Monday, March 29, 2010

Some Words About Art

I have a theory I really wish I'd used when I first started dating people: take a prospective date to a museum. Not so much for something specific, just a generalized museum that has a little of everything. I've found you learn a lot about someone based on their feelings about art.

Despite living someplace I consider a bit of a cultural wasteland, I still got some exposure to art & theater as a child. I remember going on field trips to the Stevens Center & really liking the architecture. The idea of being able to picture yourself in another time b/c of being around something that's from a long time ago is one of the reasons I picked my college. I even worked at my college's museum for 3 years & I wish I could have gone to Art Expo this weekend since I like looking at art.

One day, I'll be able to afford some. I even have some I'm going to hang if I ever get an office.

Why do I say take someone you're dating to a museum? Because I would have saved myself some serious time & heartache had I done that w/an ex.

When I was in college, Psycho Boy came to visit me. He happens to show up while I'm working at the museum one day. Upon walking in, his first statement to me is "Those people are naked!" & indicating a poster for a prior exhibit where there's a topless woman.

Now personally, I'm not one of those people who makes a big fuss about artistic nudity. I find it tacky & incredibly low class to do so, especially when you're announcing it to the whole world. To make this story even better, my boss walks by & he says loudly within her earshot "That chick is hot!" I said "That's my boss." I don't know whether she heard him or not but if she did, she never told me.

Honestly, a museum separates the cultured from the non-cultured. If you want to call me snotty, fine but I do think I have a little more culture than some of the people I know from my hometown.

I also think aside from figuring out where your potential boy/girlfriend falls on that divide, you also learn about people based on what they like or hate. My husband & I have similar tastes in art, actually. I consider myself comfortable in almost any social setting but I can't really deal w/people who are like Psycho Boy in that regard. At least, I couldn't have a serious relationship w/someone like that or spend huge amounts of time with them.

Thursday, March 25, 2010

The "Casting Couch"

We all know about the casting couch: sleep w/me & I'll make you a star. It's a huge part of the movie "Chicago" & the stories are legendary. Seems like you'd better put out to be a success, right?

How many people do you think I slept with to get where I am? Come on, guess. Two, ten, one? Give up?

ZERO. Seriously, zero. I got where I am based on being a professional, good at my job & people believing in my abilities. I'm also not the only person who can say that. Plenty of people have gotten somewhere without having to sleep with anyone.

An actress I know from the film company who's already awesome impressed me even more when she proclaimed on her Facebook that she would NEVER sleep with people to get to the top. Jace Nicole is the sort of actress that you should feel honored to be compared to: aside from being a great actress & conducting herself as a professional in all my dealings w/her, she has integrity. Integrity is important to me & I respect anyone who has it. Showing me you have it makes you go up even more notches in my book.

No one should think for a second that ALL film & TV companies have a casting couch. I don't see my film company ever doing that. If they did, I'd be the first person trying to stop it & it's my job to make sure nothing underhanded is going on. A lawyer is supposed to keep you honest.

Nor do I think the CEO would put up with it. For one thing, I doubt he & this actress would be friends if he would. Second, no one wants to work w/someone who's only talent is sexual. Knowing this man is one of the most professional people I've seen in the industry, I have no doubt he'd stop it in 2 seconds. I have always avoided even the appearance that I got something b/c of sexual favors. I make no secret of being happily married & that I don't mix business w/my personal life. Didn't even date law school classmates based on this principle.

I recently learned of a situation I had a connection to where there was indeed a casting couch. It makes me sad that any woman would think she has to do that to get ahead. For all I know, it may still be going on. That's a HUGE problem for me as a lawyer & a person with ethics. I feel concerned that anyone who did that will think that I or my company are the same way. We're NOT!

So it's not my place to judge in life & I don't mean to be judgmental when I say "I wouldn't do it." I don't live inside anyone else's head so I can't speak to their experiences, lifestyles or struggles.

What I can say, though is if you really have the talent then you don't need sex to get ahead. Just network like a fiend & if you impress the right person, they'll take notice. I know getting in is tough but it's not worth losing your self-respect or integrity to get famous, okay? The people worth working with don't play this game.

The Spiderweb

As an attorney, I have ethical obligations (believe it or not). Under state admission rules, an attorney's conduct is watched far more carefully than that of the average person. Attorneys who participate in criminal activity or wrongdoing of any sort could lose their bar licenses. Aside from this, I happen to be an ethical person.

Unless you're harming a huge, faceless corporate entity that has screwed others over in the past (in particular me or a loved one), I'm not the person you bring in to help pull a scam. I'm fairly honest & value my reputation.

That being said, I learned recently that my day job is a complete & utter scam operation. Here's some reasons why in the order I learned of them:

A) A writer informed me that the CEO gave her & others checks that bounced like rubber balls.

B) In a writer's meeting, the CEO apparently told the writers that one of the network's shows is "filming, airing on TV right now" & finally, claimed it was being edited. I know for a fact all 3 assertions are bald faced lies.

C) Another writer apparently called DirecTV & learned there was no contract w/the CEO or the company. There's also no budget for ANY of the shows or the company itself. Even if you're not good w/that kind of thing, you always get someone who is & can produce those things from office files if asked.

D) The CEO is running a casting couch. Apparently told an actress that old lie & may STILL be sleeping w/her. She's apparently now working in the office after the tidal wave of resignations.

E) The CEO put a former employee's safety in danger after this person tried to be ethical & gather evidence. The person has received written threats & was on an elevator where the CEO tried avoiding getting his face on camera + looked as though he'd kill this person.

F) The guy has done this before. There's a RipOff Report about him doing it w/a prior business venture & using a different last name.

G) The guy has not only done it twice but did it multiple times across the country AND has multiple aliases.

H) Finally, he's apparently been sleeping w/not just one but MULTIPLE young actresses. Probably feeding them the same BS.

So, no $, a casting couch, slandering people & trying to threaten them. Nice, huh? The financial thing was enough but truth be told, the casting couch is sufficient for me to move on.

Why would I leave over the casting couch? Well, the first reason is what I said before in this blog about that issue. The second reason is I'd have to admit defeat. After all, I'm NEVER sleeping w/a boss to get ahead.

I believe in keeping your work life separate from your private life. Don't shit where you eat, fish off the company pier & all that stuff. I have no chance in hell of being perceived as a capable professional who deserves more responsibility if I have to compete w/someone who's giving sex away like candy. I also don't care to be viewed as some hooker instead of a legit professional doing a job.

One actor I informed of this said something that I'm very happy to hear. She said that I was the only person in the office who seemed to be concerned w/doing a job & was the most professional. I also gave an air of credibility to the whole thing, according to her & my leaving made her think twice about hanging around.

I wish more people thought that way. Unfortunately, there are some morons who haven't gotten it & will end up going down w/the ship if they keep it up. Even a few employees have held out & the person who informed me about how prolific this con man is says they'll be getting arrested along with him as accessories since some of them know the deal & are staying anyway.

The idea itself is sound but not w/certain people & not in that toxic atmosphere. I even found out the CEO was talking trash about me to others. Being your classic "mean girl," so to speak. That's something else I can't stand & it's pretty much a Southern tradition.

I don't know if there's a way to make it legit but if there is, there won't be the utter disorganization, total lies or lack of an open forum to air one's grievances. Not to mention that if you're going to do something, you need to do it right or not bother at all. I despise half efforts.

Now I have another rant in me but this has needed to be said.

Monday, March 22, 2010

Extreme Actions Over Piddling BS

I was half watching the new episode of The Simpsons last night & it triggered a rant that's been on my mind for a while but I haven't entirely expressed yet. That would be extreme actions over piddling issues.

In this episode, a girl basically plays up to the worst stereotypes about females & after claiming to like him, gets kissed by Bart. After she engages in one of many mind changes on this issue, her parents get attorneys who come to the school & go to the principal w/lawyers as well as practically demand Bart to roll naked in hot coals to atone for his "sin."

Let me just say these words: GIVE ME A FUCKING BREAK!!!!!!!

A) Most elementary school kids don't even know what sexual harassment IS. I'm pretty sure if you went to my 6 year old nephew on this, he wouldn't have a clue.

B) A boy kissed me one day at recess when I was in 2nd grade. I didn't actually tell anyone but if my parents had run to a lawyer's office, I would have thought they were morons & they'd have made me a bigger target for torment than I already was (I was a VERY intelligent child).

C) Girls acting like this child on The Simpsons are setting themselves up to be future rape victims in my book. I don't abide by the "tease" and have NEVER done that to a guy. If I want to do anything romantic w/you, you'll know it. If I don't, you won't see me running around acting to the contrary.

If anyone ever dared to try that with my sweet, intelligent & cute as a button 6 year old nephew (and for that matter, if it happened to my soon to be born nephew), I would call the offending child's parents exactly what they are: total & complete morons who need to attend a child psychology course ASAP b/c they are too stupid to breed. I would say that as a lawyer, I find them morally reprehensible & that they need to have their children taken away so their daughters won't grow up to become rape victims.

The other major gripe I have here is the arrest of a 16 year old for making the announcement at the NJ Wal-Mart that "all black people should leave the store." Yes, it's tacky & stupid but ARRESTING this kid?!?!?!?!? Don't we have more serious criminals to pursue? Shouldn't we be arresting illegals who harm people or serial killers, child molesters & other criminals who are far higher on the food chain than some stupid teenager.

Here's a cheaper solution: just put this kid in the middle of some black neighborhood. If this child is indeed a bigot, then vigilante justice can save everyone the time, manpower & resources the cops could use to deal with bigger problems. Perhaps government corruption, for starters. Personally, I think maybe this kid was engaging in a stupid prank & that Wal-Mart should have been more careful in where it placed access to its PA system.

If it were me, I'd just call for the stupid people to leave. I loathe morons & can't help but take joy in some of the demises on 1,000 Ways to Die since it's simple Darwinism come to life. You don't want to eat during that show & I've turned away from the TV plenty of times b/c some of the deaths are creepy but if you're dumb enough to do some of that stuff, you deserve what you get. Enough said.

Friday, March 19, 2010

Focus on Writing

I guess it's pretty fortunate that I got a new freelance writing assignment that's going to take me a pretty decent amount of time & required me to go to the nearby bar association library to get state specific materials but will lead to a decent amount when it's all said and done. I looked at my calendar today & said "Wait a minute! Tomorrow's 10 days from when this assignment for 51 articles is due. If I show up to my day job, I can't finish by the deadline."

At least I have gotten the required materials for most of the articles & can get the rest when I go to my Entertainment Committee meeting at a different bar association on Tuesday. However, I know that I need to work from home for many reasons:

A) Controlled environment
B) Access to my food & my fridge
C) Using my computer
D) Ability to listen to music so I can get into the creative flow
E) Wearing what I want

I also have to prevent planning anything in that time since I'll need a quality of life & if I do too much, I'll get stressed out. That leads to my feeling rushed & then not getting things done as needed.

So if you don't see any new postings for a while, it just means I'm busy working on this assignment.

Thursday, March 18, 2010

On a Lighter Note

I'm still personally irritated right now over other personal matters but the situation at my job has died down due to the advice & guidance of one of our writers. The suggestion was just to ignore Little Miss Supervisor.

Apparently, Little Miss Supervisor has not learned the very first rule of working in a new business.

That rule is: Your job is to do whatever is needed for the business to get ahead.

Doesn't matter what your title is or what you're skilled at. Phones don't answer themselves, paperwork doesn't write itself & the people coming in have to have a GOOD impression of you or they're not going to care if you succeed or fail. There's a lot of crap that no one wants to do in a new business but guess what? If you want to move up, you have to do it.

I hear that Little Miss Supervisor thinks she's too good to answer phones or speak to the people; I also notice that when the phone rings, she won't answer even if she's closer to it than I am. Then again, when everyone who comes in thinks she's rude & unfriendly, it might be better to have the rest of us do it.

Even I, the resident pit bull/enforcer, am liked by co-workers & registering actors/crew members/writers/etc.; at a minimum, people respect me & my knowledge + the fact that I can see the big picture. I don't waste time on losing propositions.

Since I've not gotten an apology of any sort, I'm ignoring her. This writer, whom I have a great deal of respect for as an artist & professional, said that we shouldn't let this person push us out of the company--she makes a good point. My husband said something similar, in fact.

As this individual is also avoiding me (a smart person would be afraid of what I might say or do later on & of getting the blame if I choose to leave permanently since I'm much harder to replace), I think it can be managed for now. I will, however, keep an eye on the situation.

EVERY SINGLE person who has heard about this agrees that no young kid who just got out of college should be bossing around an attorney, especially one doing what I'm doing & certainly not the resident pit bull. I don't feel I was unreasonable & it warms my heart that others agree w/me on this. My boss also knows I'm not putting up w/it & that if it ever happens again, I'll leave + won't offer to work from home.

I've seen the education vs. experience debate firsthand countless times; it's why I usually ask for advice from people if I'm doing something new instead of presuming that I don't need anyone's guidance. I'm not an idiot & will be the first to tell you if I don't know something off the bat.

This chick has some serious tone & perception problems she needs to work on if she wants to get along w/us or get anyone's respect. You can't demand respect; you have to earn it. It's also a good idea to have some rapport w/your co-workers or at least SOME common ground.

I swear, my book will probably be on how to run an entertainment company & not screw it up.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010


I love the sense of freedom you get when you're working in an abusive job environment & you say "Enough! This is going too far & I'm out the door."

The only difference between me & many other people is that I actually have walked out of jobs where the work place environment was abusive or protocol wasn't respected. I've only done it twice but I did give one Regional Manager an earful in college when I was treated unfairly.

First time I walked away: a document review assignment in New Jersey. I was there about 10 days. The first sign of trouble was being moved from a room in a separate area to this law library.

The second problem was when the supervisors took a vote about whether to open window blinds, everyone voted "yes" & one of the supervisors who should have been working as a high school Vice Principal decides to close them.

The third was when I was told we could not speak to our co-workers yet some man a few rows away was chatting so loudly on a cell phone, I could hear him clear as a bell. NOT ONE supervisor OR librarian tells this man to lower his voice.

The fourth was when the supervisors set up an "Internet cafe" in the workspace so people can check their personal things with supervisors watching them; that's a no-no w/my business e-mail.

The fifth was when we had nothing to do & supervisors were trying to give people busy work despite the common rule/custom that when there was nothing to do, your time was yours as long as you stayed in the building. I went down to the break room a few floors down to chat w/people to avoid this nonsense.

The straw that broke the cammel's back was when I returned to the break room & supervisors claimed that someone's food had been taken from their sitting place. These people had the gall to threaten to ban our access to the break room.

I decided then & there it was time to hit the road. I made up something about having a film company emergency, signed out, gathered my things, left the building, called the temp agency & called the CEO of the film company. He sided w/me on leaving & we're a functional family at the film company so no worries about him trying to make me do something I didn't want to do. Even my own husband, who was concerned about our finances sided with me on walking out of this micromanaging, Wal-Mart pit.

I'd hoped others would gain courage from me walking out the door but they stayed like drones & I never heard from them again.

I remember that when I got back into NYC, I decided to walk around for a while. Take it easy since I had all this free time. I felt like Peter Gibbons in "Office Space" after he sees the hypnotist & no longer gives a crap about if he's going to get fired. I LOVE that feeling; it's informed much of what I do & how I function in life.

So today, I did my second walk off from a job. Only this time it may not be a permanent walk off but more like working in a location where I'm more comfortable.

To make a long story short, if you hire a lawyer to work in an entertainment company & write contracts/perform services that lawyers tend to handle then do not think for one minute that lawyer's going to listen to some "Office Manager." Especially if that lawyer has her own company & was placed in charge of her own office building akin to the position of the CEO. Don't let this Office Manager think she can treat her like an underling & expect that lawyer to return. That lawyer will tell you just where to go. This lawyer especially.

If I wanted to put up with abuse or nonsense, I can just go be a hooker or stripper. I'd make a HELL of a lot more money & put up with plenty of abuse, hassle, nonsense, etc.

Monday, March 15, 2010

A Church as a Nightclub??

I just found this provocative.

How do I feel about this?? Good question. My mother was one of the people I knew who suggested meeting men in church.

To be honest, that idea always made me feel sleazy. First off, aren't you supposed to be going to church for the service & because you believe in that church's platform/teachings/philosophies? Second, if I'm using church to troll for men, how far should I go?? Should I just walk in wearing a short dress with stilettos & tons of cleavage? Do I just start looking at men's butts or trying to get an idea of dick length while I'm sitting in a church? Should I start chatting w/other women my age in the church to get an idea of the eligible men?

Come to think of it, what if that church's dating pool is like a soap opera? If everyone's got a history with someone, I know I'd want no part of it. That's a big reason I never dated anyone I went to school with--I didn't care to have everyone there know what my private parts look like or how good I am in bed. If they had, I'd have never gotten any homework done & eventually flunked out. My dating life was crazy enough without anyone knowing that kind of thing about me.

Finally, I just think it's like having sex on someone's headstone: it's disrespectful. I don't see getting horny in a church or forging a real connection with a guy you meet there. Not to mention there are plenty of scummy men who attend church; plenty of pedophiles & serial killers have been active church members, you know?

I like the idea of having a non-religious nightclub in a church w/no conversion attempts. It probably helps that church get credibility and membership from people who'd never attend otherwise. However, I wonder about the practicality of it all.

I know meeting guys in bars & clubs isn't all that great but I was WAY too shy to approach anyone. I also know I'd have been uncomfortable approaching anyone in a church; plus, with my luck the guy would be super-devout & simply not worth my time due to the obvious differences.

Call me shallow but I don't prescribe to the idea of being a virgin until you get married: look at "Sex & the City." Not to mention the simple fact that sex is an important part of marriage & you'd better know ahead of time whether you have anything in that department. I wouldn't even stay in a celibate marriage; thankfully, my husband feels the exact same way. How many problems have happened b/c of people denying their sexual urges or seeing sex as shameful? Not to mention how society makes fun of people who are still virgins at 25 & upwards. Plus, do you want your first sexual experience to be the result of a rape?

That's not to say I think 15 year olds should be having sex. You just need to be old enough & mature enough to accept the responsibility + consequences that go with it. If you can't raise a baby on your own or get birth control, you don't need to do it.

The basic thing I come down to on this issue is whether you can face yourself the next day if you decide to have sex. After all, it's your life & you have to live with your own life choices. If you can deal with that, then to hell with what anyone else has to say about you.

As my high school Chemistry teacher once said, have meaningful experiences when you're young so when you're 60, you won't look back & wish you'd done more with your life.

Sunday, March 14, 2010

More Caving to Public Pressure

I saw this story not long ago about how animal rights activists & PETA are targeting this figure skater.

Unfortunately, this guy decided to let these protesters dictate things to him. If it were me, I'd be saying "Fuck you." There's a right to free speech for ALL, not just for the opinions we like.

As for my stance on animal rights & the environment as a whole, I really don't fit a set category. I'm not a vegetarian hippie but I'm also not a supporter of unnecessary harm to animals. Guess you could say I'm more of a pragmatist: you're not going to stop the entire world from eating meat, using cosmetics, buying fur coats or not recycling.

If these things cost more money or involve more hassle than doing something harmful to the environment, of course people will do the more harmful activity.

I also think animal experimentation is here to stay unless/until you can use stem cells or human beings for those experiments. Part of this comes from the fact that I took science courses in school & originally planned to be a pharmacist so I'd know how to make drugs. I have a respect for science & common sense as opposed to regressing to living in the woods and not having modern conveniences.

So if PETA and environmental groups really wanted to advance their causes, they would not run around preaching to people. Instead, they'd try to make it easier, cheaper and more convenient for people to not harm animals. They'd push hard for viable public transportation everywhere, more incentives to recycle and stop expecting people to spend more money or waste more time doing something more difficult. PETA has just alienated themselves among the general population & become as hated as religious groups trying to get abortion outlawed. Same busybody attitude & no willingness to step up to the plate to solve the bigger problems that CAUSE people to eat meat or harm animals in the first place.

That sort of thing pisses me off when people go on & on about improving one's diet or buying organic food. Make it cheaper if you want people to do it & stop defending the high prices; maybe if that changed, more people would buy better foods.

The only people who don't see this are obviously spoiled trust fund babies who've never worked a real job in their lives and have no clue how the other half lives.

Saturday, March 13, 2010

Where Does the Work Life End & Private Life Begin?

This post in the Punk Rock HR blog is a great sum up of what I'm concerned about w/respect to working in a day job.

Basically, where do you draw the line b/t someone's personal privacy & their abilities to do a job? I've asked this of HR bloggers since it seems that some HR employees are too busy playing Grammar Nazi w/someone's Twitter posts & berating people for having pictures of themselves w/beer bottles to do any ACTUAL WORK.

My boss recently friended me on Facebook. I asked whether I was going to have to worry about being fired b/c of anything I post there (since my profile does pertain to aspects of my private life). He says "No," and seemed shocked I'd even ask the question. I explained my reasoning & he seemed to think it was as messed up as I think it is.

That's just one reason why this guy is a good boss, at least to me. Most other bosses want to micromanage & stick their noses into your private business; at least, that's what I'm seeing today w/more technology. Let's fact it, if you're a business owner you'd need a boss like mine or you'd be miserable. It's great having a job where you're expected to be honest & deliver straight talk, no matter what the person wants to hear.

Thank God I did my low level work before Facebook, MySpace & Twitter became popular. I'm also glad I dated before that time; ironically, it was my husband who introduced me to MySpace. This was back before Rupert Murdoch owned it.

I have some very personal beliefs concerning abortion.

First off, unless you've been in the situation you need to shut the hell up! Men, until you can get pregnant don't even speak to me. As long as you can't contractually obligate a man to care for a baby once it's born & take him to court for damages to your body, medical appointments, etc. they're going to have fewer rights in those decisions than the woman who's carrying the fetus. The men who agree w/this basic reality are golden w/me. I made sure never to date a man who'd dare tell me what to do w/my own body if I were faced w/that situation; pro-lifers were out.

It would be like me trying to tell rape victims how to cope; I've never been in that situation so I know better than to open my mouth on that subject.

Second, I beg to differ on the "all women regret it" argument. There are people who don't take it that seriously & think like Sethe in the book Beloved: basically, that the embryo/fetus is better off not being born than being born into a drug den, abuse, poverty, rape victim, etc. I think we should reward people who make responsible choices & know when they shouldn't be bringing innocent children into the world to face abuse, diseases, ridicule, unfit parents, lives in the court system, excessive therapy, etc. It's the same reason why grown ups should make their own decisions on sterilization w/out pompous, know it all doctors trying to play God with their lives.

I personally had to fight tooth & nail to get a tubal ligation at 26 years old. Here's what's wrong w/that:

A) I'm a grown up
B) I agreed to sign a statement waiving liability to the doctor performing the surgery if I "changed my mind" since that would be my problem & mine alone
C) I'm a professional person who really loves her career & would resent a child for taking it away from me, thus negating my fitness to be a proper parent
D) My husband & I made the mutual decision not to have kids
E) It's MY FUCKING LIFE!!!!! MY body, MY life, MY marriage & MY family being affected. Not some doctor's. I don't have to play "Mother, May I" when it comes to my body, okay?
F) Legally speaking, I have every right to make my own decision on this one. The Supreme Court & the Constitution protect me & my marriage from this kind of intrusion via rulings on contraception.

If voluntary sterilization were more widely available to women who wanted it and agreed to waive liability for "changing their minds", I think we could start dealing w/the abortion issue. Until that time, women are stuck paying a lot of money for birth control, popping out at least 2 kids (and sometimes even that's not enough) or remaining life long virgins if they don't want kids.

Finally, the religious issue. For God's sake, don't quote the Bible to me.

Not everyone is a Christian & not everyone is a member of YOUR faith.

No one's making YOU get an abortion so unless you are going to adopt the child of the pregnant person you're berating for going to an abortion clinic, shut your pie hole & keep your Bible at your church. This is the essence of a free country; if you want a religious dictatorship, get out of America & form your own on some island no one is ruling over. Better yet, go live in Iraq.

If any employer at a job having nothing to do with the issue tried to disparage me at work or fire me for my views, there'd be some serious problems. I have to wonder when we're going to see some constitutional lawsuits on things like this since this is a free speech & expression issue. I predict that once we get some lawsuits on this kind of thing, employers won't get to use employees' personal lives in workplace matters when those stances or actions have ZERO to do w/the business or the employee's job title.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

To Be an Entertainment Executive

I guess I'll eventually have to write a book on doing this type of stuff in small entertainment companies. I've certainly learned many things working at my day job & in the film company.

One of the biggest things I've learned from my day job is this: Being an executive means sometimes having to hurt people's feelings. It means not taking shit from anyone & acting in the best interests of the company and your team.

When one person is trying to bring things down, it corrodes a company from within. Especially if the person is a wannabe who is A) young, B) doesn't know beans about the industry & C) immature. If you can't hack it with a soon to be national television network, then you need to be out the door.

One of the actors (let's use that term loosely) is known for being difficult, having an attitude problem and being immature. She's also known for being a liar. A co-worker who is also one of the network's writers informed me of this wannabe actor's shenanigans, including:

* Massive insubordination in the form of ignoring this person's authority
* Whining about personal problems (if you're hungry, eat before you get to the reading)
* Defaming the company to new actors & a new employee; and
* To top it off, telling one of the writers that she "didn't have to listen to any
f-ing body" but my boss b/c my boss is the one who signs her checks.

NONE of the writers want to work w/her & she's ticked off nearly all of my co-workers. The writer/co-worker informed my boss yesterday that if this actor didn't get terminated, she'd be quitting. My boss said he'd think about it.

The wannabe hasn't been nasty to me since I openly called her out for it the first time she tried it (my boss & another co-worker thought I was going to curse at her but I didn't). I also try to tell her things as someone who knows how execs, directors, producers, etc. think & the impression they form of actors doing things I hear about her doing.

After hearing this little comment about not having to listen to anyone, I would have dialed her up right then & there to confront her if her number had been in my reach.

Instead, I decide to have my boss hear what this co-worker just told me. Then I say that if this person isn't terminated, I will leave & take the actors I know w/me. I mentioned that I will not damage my film company's reputation by working someplace where some wannabe gets to ride shotgun over industry professionals & by extension, me; people there already know I'm not taking shit from anyone. I also pointed out the exact provision of the contract she's violated & that she could be sued for defamation of character for her statements to new actors.

Now, I like my boss. Nice guy. But I don't think he's had to get rid of people so much since he's given far more chances to folks than I or some of my co-workers would have. Maybe people have been more amenable to him than they have to me or some of the writers (their stories would make you shudder). Maybe he sees some of himself in this person. I don't know.

What I DO know is that I'm not paid to be a "yes" woman. I'm paid to help get the network off the ground & ensure that no one's sneaking around on the higher ups while they're doing more important things.

Being a lawyer should clear up any confusion about my duties to be "nice", a "doormat" or to let anyone push me or my co-workers around. I don't have to suck up & wouldn't do it anyway; I'm supposed to be candid & direct. If you try to stop me from doing these things, there's no point in wasting my time or yours.

I also know that when one inexperienced, immature person has alienated so many other people w/more important jobs, you need to side w/the people who are harder to replace & who have more industry experience. For me, I have responsibilities to the writers, investors, sponsors and anyone else whose reputation is being put on the line by working w/the network. No one wants to be around that. I'm also far harder to replace than any wannabe actor.

I understand the struggle to make it in this business but part of that success also falls on YOU. If you can't treat it like you would a day job, you don't belong there. Stick to school plays & less restrictive places where they might put up w/that mess. Don't do it w/any production company if you want to work as a full time actor.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

How You Know You're Following Your Passion

I work in Lower Manhattan & almost every weekday morning, I'm on the subway to go to work. Riding the subway is a unique, interesting experience. Some mornings you get free entertainment, an opportunity to buy candy bars, hear some interesting conversation and/or see some captivating people. It's one of those things I intend to do as much as possible, even once things start taking off in my career.

I feel like doing it is a way to keep yourself grounded & appreciate what you have. Not to mention the inspiration you can get from this ritual & it being cheaper than always taking cabs. I took MARTA in Atlanta but it has nothing on the NYC subway system.

This morning, I was sitting on the train as usual. What was different is that this guy in a suit carrying a style of bag you normally see lawyers with as well as what looked like a law book walked on. He stood in front of me & held the pole above my seat. He then opens the book, holds it in his other hand & starts reading. Since I always notice evidence of lawyers & law students on trains, I peered at the cover; it was a Constitutional Law book.

Two thoughts struck me:

1. Amazement that this guy could fully open & read the law book using one hand, hold the pole & not once stumble or lose his balance on the moving subway, even when we were traveling faster later on. I know I couldn't.

2. I LOVE doing what I do in the entertainment business. I love the fact that I can wear jeans & sneakers to work as well as be truly honest in doing things. I love that my opinion matters & that people listen to what I have to say. Even though I'm not making all that much doing it, I feel a true passion for it. The workday generally flies by, I have great co-workers to talk to & even if I'm not that busy, the day still moves on. I honestly look forward to going to work in the mornings & usually WANT to get up in the morning.

When I see lawyers on the subway, I'm happy not to be them. They usually look miserable & don't seem to have the passion I have for what I do. This is especially true w/younger lawyers.

I was struck by the fact that I'd be completely miserable if I were working in a law firm & having this calm, content feeling is great (finances be damned). I really think more people should figure out and follow their passion; the minute you start behaving like "a grown up" or tell others to do it & stop following "silly dreams", it means your soul has died.

People like that aren't able to see possibility & would rather whine about being miserable than take steps to change anything wrong in their lives. They really piss me off; if you aren't bothering to improve your own life, then don't whine to me about how bad you have it. Don't begrudge people of their happiness when you refuse to make yourself happy, okay?

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Employment Based on Credit Records

This just pisses me off!

Okay, genius tell me how anyone's supposed to improve their situation when A) you refuse to consider someone for a job since they didn't pay their bills & B) the person has been unemployed or otherwise had no money to PAY for said bills.

This is the same reasoning used by character & fitness committees for attorneys trying to get admitted to the bar. It is 100% classist & completely offensive. As someone who was caught in this catch-22 herself, it still infuriates me to this day. Contrary to their theory, I had nothing else on my record. Not even a parking ticket to my name.

It's obvious to me that anyone looking at credit reports for a job that has nothing to do with the handling of money is a total moron who came from privilege. These types are almost at the top of my list of people who should die slow, painful deaths with no one to mourn them.

Now I know a fair number of people who came from money & the ones I bother to associate with are decent people. They understand that classism is no way to help a poor person; it just keeps people down & makes them resort to crime in order to survive. If I personally were in such a situation, you'd better believe I'd do whatever I had to in order to survive. That's simple human nature.

If I had my way, credit reports would be far easier to correct & carry much less weight in basic decisions such as getting a place to live, having car insurance and employment. Oh, and if you expect someone to pay a debt they'll never repay it if you get a judgment on them. That just messes up their credit report & guarantees he/she will NOT get a legitimate job that might pay enough to repay it.

Studies have shown that credit reports are not completely reliable & furthermore, these alleged connections to things like bad driving, not paying rent, being vulnerable to bribes, etc. are junk. Plenty of people with sterling credit are doing these things; yet no one gives a damn about THAT.

It makes me want to withdraw from society & not have a credit history at all; I'm not a Michael Moore fan or anything (in fact, I'm a fan of no one since I won't go through anyone's trash or scream like a teenager at anyone's presence) but I will give him credit for his statement in "Sicko" about the conspiracy in this country to keep young people in line by putting them in debt forever. Check it out sometime.

Monday, March 8, 2010

Drugs & My World

I caught this article not too long ago online.

It's funny that lawyers have some very high rates of alcoholism and depression compared to other professions, yet it seems drug use is implicitly encouraged. I read plenty of stories in online lawyer communities about lawyers taking speed to function in major law firms in big cities such as NYC; even "Mr. Belvedere", a sitcom from the '80s, did an episode on it. Certainly drug use is rampant in Hollywood & the entertainment industry.

You'd think that among all this, I'd be a drug addict myself. You'd be dead wrong, however. I happen to be 100%, completely drug free. No alcohol, no illegal drugs, not even prescription medication to alter my personality. There's a few reasons for this:

1. Living with an alcoholic who also did pot-- When your parents are doing something, the appeal to do it yourself just isn't there. One time, my father was actually drinking with an older kid in our neighborhood (who happened to be underage).

2. Being from the old school-- I didn't grow up in the era of ADD diagnosis & taking prescription drugs to make you happy. We'd be more likely to talk to a therapist & solve problems w/out using drugs.

3. Liking who I am-- I feel like taking drugs would make me into a more sane, "normal" & boring person. Who wants to be MORE normal? I didn't even like taking prescriptions after surgery & dental work since I felt being dependent on drugs would zap my creative energy + take away who I am as a person.

Now, I'm not some judgmental harpy. If you can function while taking drugs & I don't know about it, that's your business. Your life, your body.

Just don't let me see you do it & don't have illegal substances in my presence. Unless you're planning to pay all my school loans & debt if you get arrested for drug possession, I'm not going down w/you on that.

Oh, and don't act like my father. I still don't have a 100%, a-okay relationship w/the man & I don't see that changing w/out serious change on his part. I'm not going to relive my childhood & my husband knows that if he did any of that stuff, it would be a deal breaker. I dated guys who drank but I'd have never seriously considered a future w/them since I figure I'd have ended up pressured to drink all the time and planning a wedding would be a pain on that issue.

Basically, I figure no one will get me to do any type of substance unless I have a terminal illness/disease & I'm going to be dead in a few weeks or something. I refuse to give my father the satisfaction of ending up like him (he point blank told me I'd end up like him someday).

For the record I'm also not the only non-drinking, sober person in the legal or entertainment industry, all right? Just don't call me "straight edge" since I hate that term & have some life experience, thanks.

Sunday, March 7, 2010

More Basic Problems I Have w/"Typical Relationships"

Another insipid article I saw online that I'm sure someone is using as "the gospel."

For #1, I think music can be an issue if you violently hate a genre that your SO likes. For instance, I can't STAND country music. There's no way would I have married my husband if he was a fan of Garth Brooks or big on that genre. I'd have told him to move to the South since there's probably far more country music fans there. Not to mention I'm so unlike the Southern stereotypes, it's criminal to call ME a Southerner.

#2: I dated this guy in college who has forever been known as Psycho Boy. At that time, I was heading to my 2nd year of college; he had dropped out of high school. My own mother predicted that relationship wouldn't last b/c of the education divide. Plenty of other things ended it but looking back, I think the education level does make a difference if you want a long term future.

I've also had countless people say I use "big words" when I'm just speaking as I normally do. I don't go around trying to make people feel stupid (unless someone is being an ass to me). I don't think you have to prescribe to someone else's views but if you don't even know WHO I'm talking about, I think you're going to have serious problems. Not to mention income differences that can result.

#3: I have to disagree if you're noticing a pattern. One friend who does something stupid or annoying is one thing; a pack is a different story. My sister distanced herself from certain friends who were not very great parents and had different priorities from her--truth is your friends' behavior can easily rub off on you.

#4: Nope, this is a major problem. My own parents are living proof w/my father spending money on the debit card, not writing down what he spent & then my mother getting an unpleasant surprise when some bill needs to be paid. It made me refuse to share a checking account w/anyone. Now I may have trust issues here, but I would never share finances 50-50 w/a spendthrift. My own father stole money from me as a child & my own parents borrowed money from me as a kid since I actually saved my allowance. I'm still pissed about that.

#5: Never, in a million years, would I dare tell my husband how to dress OR pick out clothes for him. I wouldn't have done that to ANY man. Why???

Because it's rude & tacky. I can dress myself but I'm not a professional stylist so what entitles me to do it? Plus, girlfriend/wife DOES NOT = Mommy. Not my job to dress a grown up or make a man over. If you like someone, you accept that person for who they are NOT what you can make them.

It's the same thing as trying to make an alcoholic sober or fix a drug addict. You CAN'T do it. If the person wants to be a certain way, either deal with it or get out. If a man had ever done that to me, I'd be furious. People aren't Barbie and Ken dolls.

Needless to say, my husband would never be described as or say he's "whipped." I don't want to be anyone's warden; if I make someone that miserable, there's no point to dealing with me. A friend of mine told me a few days ago he wanted to find a woman like me; it's sad that more women haven't gotten a clue on some of this stuff. I'm sure they'd have happier relationships & be better people.

So the take home lesson here is: accept someone for who they are, warts & all or don't waste your time.

Saturday, March 6, 2010

The Benefits of a Live Program (chuckle)

I got an e-mail a few days ago from the NYC Bar Association that had this heading. When I saw it, I laughed. I'll tell you why in a bit.

First, let me explain this entry's title for those who aren't attorneys or professionals w/Continuing Education requirements to keep working in your field. If you have a professional license to do something (in my case being a lawyer), part of keeping that license is getting CLE (Continuing Legal Education) hours. There are certain types & amounts that you have to meet in a certain time period or you don't get to renew your professional license. If you're a lawyer, not meeting the CLE requirement usually means you're in hot water w/the state bar committee since they decide who gets to be a lawyer & who doesn't.

To meet these CLE hours, you can either go to a course in person or get DVDs/CDs of the courses in exchange for meeting the hours. In NY, you MUST attend in person for the first 2 years you've been admitted before getting to buy DVDs/CDs and doing it on your own.

Now, just like every lawyer I've met who works on the creative side of this industry, I'm not a big fan of bar associations as a whole. How come? Well:

A) A general problem w/the attitude & mindset of your typical lawyer
B) No one's doing what I'm doing. I'm lucky to meet an entertainment lawyer who only handles the legal side.
C) The utter lack of consideration for new attorneys or the impact the recession has had on them. There are events I'd go to, but I'm not paying $20 to go. I wouldn't even pay that to go to a club.

I also wouldn't go to NYC Bar for basic CLE programs since the price for them is highway robbery. NYCLA (New York County Lawyers Association) is my preferred vendor since their courses are about 1/2 the price of City Bar's & for Bridge the Gap, it was a decent rate. Now I've not taken courses as someone who isn't a newly admitted lawyer & City Bar may have more things for my industry but for basic stuff, I'd recommend NYCLA.

So you may wonder why I'm in ANY bar association? Fair question. CLE discounts, retailer discounts, access to the library & being on City Bar's entertainment committee.

I also figure I'll do much more quality networking through my involvement in City Bar & honestly have had more pleasant experiences at their events than I have at NYCLA's. Lawyers at many of the City Bar events have treated me as a colleague instead of as some newbie lawyer that has to impress them.

I don't have to impress ANY lawyer; in fact, it's not my task to actively impress most people. If I can't stand on my own without schmoozing or brown-nosing then I don't deserve anything from you, right? I generally don't have that kind of problem but tons of lawyers act that way & if you want to make me an enemy, just act like an elitist asshole w/no personality. Telling me to tolerate the game really doesn't make me want to hang around lawyers or have a damn thing to do with them, regardless of my being one. It just makes me cling to my perceptions even harder.

To give you an example of how out of place I am w/most lawyers, I actually left the NYCLA Young Lawyer's committee because I felt ignored. I made comments at the only meeting I went to that weren't even in the minutes. I didn't feel like a valued member or someone whose opinion counted; nor did anyone make me feel like they wanted to talk to me & obviously, no one was doing what I do.

How many people would you think have talked to me at any live CLE event? Come on, guess? Give up?

Two. These weren't even conversations that led to any future contact or friendship, nor went beyond simple pleasantries. So I find it hilarious that a bar association would try to encourage me to go to a live course by saying I can network there.

How can I network when no one bothers to even exchange pleasantries with me? I've heard other people at these events talk about the snobbery of other lawyers attending. To any lawyer's snobbery to me, I say "Fuck you & the horse you rode in on." I've forgotten more about being a snob than you're ever going to know, believe it or not. I was called a prep in middle school despite being tormented by that very crowd & being stuck in classes with them. I'm sure people are STILL calling me a snob since I'm quiet and have to get to know you before I'll even think about trusting you with minor stuff.

People who do the same stuff I do in the industry have told me about feeling the exact same way about going to live CLE events & seeing the exact same attitude. I bet a good chunk of it is envy & jealousy among these jerks since we don't have to impress THEM or play their game.

Let's also get something else straight about networking: when it's with lawyers, you're NEVER on equal footing unless one's years in practice, technical skill or ability to stop you from moving up are a non-issue. I think it's a non-issue in creative stuff like stage performance or playing a game unrelated to the legal field but otherwise, forget it. It's just a dog & pony show.

The creative arena is MUCH more supportive of newer people in the field & doesn't work as a hierarchy with respect to people doing different jobs. Not all actors can become directors or producers & the skills are different for all those jobs. There are directors and producers who were never actors. Yeah there are rules but overall, there's also much more respect & a willingness to pay it forward than I see in the legal field. Not to mention encouraging individuality & doing things differently, unlike with typical lawyers. I see a lot less snobbery among higher ups in entertainment since there's consequences for that.

The biggest thing that bothers me about lawyers is a total lack of loyalty to fellow lawyers. There's so much back-biting, put downs & clique mentality, it's not funny. I left that 7th grade behavior in 7th grade; it was immature then & it's even more immature to see it in grown ups.

So needless to say, I'll be getting CLE credits on my own & through alternate efforts. I'm thrilled I never have to go to a live course ever again. The only lawyer acquaintances or friends I have either worked in the industry, have some creative bone in their body or had similar struggles to mine so they're also calling BS on stuff like this. Those people are cool with me; otherwise, I join in the chorus of people who say they hate lawyers.

Friday, March 5, 2010

Children in Bars

My husband was telling me about comments on this issue yesterday but I hadn't seen it until I did a web search. Apparently, this is what happens in Park Slope.

I'm not big on hipsters to begin with. What I mean by "hipster" is "artist living off a trust fund & behaving as a poser instead of a TRUE artist." Someone who has no originality, blindly follows trends & walks around w/an attitude of entitlement: that's my definition of a hipster.

But worse than a hipster is the "hipster breeder." This means someone who has children & refuses to behave like a decent parent. Taking kids into bars (as opposed to TGIFridays, Chili's or some place that's more of a family restaurant) is disgusting. I think someone who does it should be called out & have CPS investigate them.

Guess what? You get ONE or the OTHER. You can be a single person & go to bars or you can be a parent & raise kids. When you become a parent, it's not appropriate to take your kids to bars, do drugs or expose them to adult activity. Do you also let them watch you have sex??? Light up joints? My sister knows parents who have done drugs while their young kids were asleep in the SAME house & no sober adults were around. How responsible is that???

Part of my disgust comes from the fact that my father's a practicing alcoholic & smoked a fair amount of pot in my late high school/college years. As in, walking into the house and being hit with a cascade of pot odor. Didn't exactly like growing up to see my father get drunk & throw things at us. It's not much fun to have someone embarrass you all the time & having it limit your outside interactions with people for fear they won't talk to you if they know the truth.

When a parent gets so drunk they can't take you to things you were looking forward to or you fear people you know seeing that parent intoxicated somewhere in town, it makes you less enthused about exposing children to drinking.

If you want to be a parent, then be a PARENT. Don't be stuck in your single days.

At least being married, I can go out with my husband and we can speak as adults. If we want to make out or curse, we don't need or want some ignorant entitlemoo (to borrow a childfree term) telling us to shield her little precious from adult content in an adult space. Burn in hell!! No parent I know of would even THINK of taking their kid into a bar. I wouldn't even take a kid to the Comedy Cellar or some of the UCB Theater shows. I would be just as disgusted seeing a kid in a dance club considering the type of dancing that goes on.

I know what raising a kid properly entails & that's why I refuse to do it. I won't give up my career or the fun aspects of my marriage for one; if you'd resent a kid for cramping your style, it means you shouldn't have one. Get it?

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Illegal Immigration & Racism

I'm way behind on my rants & I told you it was coming, but it seems that if you're pro-illegal immigration, you're also a racist.

Have to say I do agree w/the point of the article. I remember being in high school & a friend of mine (she happened to be black) had the EXACT same things to say about the sudden rise of illegals in our hometown as I did. The biggest problem we saw was the utter rudeness we had to encounter; men in these families would leer & stare at you as though you were Cindy Crawford. My own mother was subject to racial slurs, being called "Lucy" by the illegals living in our neighborhood at that time & my sister's friend had some of these assholes making nasty remarks about her butt in Spanish.

Guess what? NO ONE likes being stared at. NO ONE likes unprovoked racial slurs, especially when they've lived someplace a LOT longer than you. NO ONE likes newcomers who refuse to adapt to their way of life & demanding everyone else cater to them by learning THEIR language, letting them run wild on the streets and generally acting entitled to all this nonsense.

My family lived in the thick of this back in the late '90s. It's STILL a problem today; now they're happy living elsewhere. It's not even limited to the South. My husband has told me about the same issues going on in Long Island and the rather clever response of the local racists when there was talk of building a community center for the waiting day laborers; that response was "now we can bomb the place & solve the problem of their presence."

Having lived in major cities as well as my hometown, I have to say that certain areas of the country should not get involved in this debate. In New York City and Atlanta, I have not faced the same kinds of problems. People either know the language or are incredibly polite if they don't. There's very little demands to cater to the foreign language speakers. Many people who immigrated to this country can't stand the illegals who refuse to adapt to American life or deliberately jumped the line & didn't legally become citizens like many of them did; they agree that when you go to a new country, you need to adapt to that country's ways instead of demanding the country to adapt to you.

When I was very young, we lived on a military base in Texas. In Texas, there was a similar congeniality on languages.

Here's my basic thoughts (if you're not fleeing genocide or basic threats to your life):

If you learn the language, don't commit crime, follow our laws & aren't living off the government, you're cool. You're the kind of immigrant who SHOULD be living here & should probably get to exchange citizenship w/some unhappy American who wants to defect (or one of the many sheeple). You deserve fair wages, decent housing and to be treated the same as anyone else in this country.

But if you're refusing to learn English, standing in rallies demanding rights, stealing someone's identity to get a job or license you shouldn't even have, not carrying insurance, being a bigot, didn't bother becoming a legal citizen, have a million kids you refuse to take care of and otherwise acting like a jerk, get out!! We have enough problems w/actual citizens.

I also have some harsh words for employers and people hiring illegals. Cut the crap!!! Plenty of citizens are unemployed right now & deserve better than 3rd world wages. For that matter, you shouldn't be allowed to pay those kinds of wages to illegals either. Just b/c that 3rd world wage is lots of money in some other country doesn't mean you get to shortchange that person when (s)he is in THIS country where things cost much more.

Yeah, there's the noise about the economy & "blah, blah, blah." Prices going up & all that. My response is stop excusing law breaking. Should we also let rapists & child molesters run free? Should murders be treated like nothing since we never punish illegals for anything? I know an illegal who beat an infant & that little girl will never be the same. He also beat my sister's friend; do you think anyone tried to have HIM deported???? NOOOOO!!!

Yet someone from a Middle Eastern country can do something minor & the government will lock that person up instantly. This disgusts me on so many levels, it's not funny. Life isn't easy & I'm right behind the people who say no amnesty for popping out a hundred babies that are getting government aid. I'm sure the next terrorist move will be to make a deal w/Mexico & having terrorists walk in alongside the illegals who stream in daily. That's where the smart money would be.

Let's make such decisions on a case by case basis & keep the people who are following basic laws, learning the language and think of themselves as Americans first & foremost. If my husband or I were in politics, we'd either be beloved or hated depending on who you talked to.

Oh, and if you're not LIVING in neighborhoods w/illegals acting in offensive manners keep your mouth shut. Don't call someone a racist while you're living in a McMansion in the suburbs far away from the realities of an entitled, clannish population that considers you an intruder. When YOU live around these people & see what goes on, then you'll have an opinion worth listening to. Otherwise, no one wants to hear it.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Internet is FINALLY Back Up

After what seemed like an eternity, we finally figured out the problem w/our home Internet. Apparently, we not only had the line go down but also had a problem w/our modem. The ethernet connection isn't connecting properly so now we're getting a replacement modem.

Good words to Verizon for giving us a free one in exchange for signing up for a very fairly priced service plan for the replacement. The tech my husband dealt with today had a clue, unlike many prior people he'd dealt with.

So my little rant about Internet tech support is as old as the hills but I do agree w/the camp that says "stop it w/the offices in India." At the very least, train those people to do more than read a freaking script!!! Perhaps there should be regional tech support services when dealing w/regions of the country where accents are impossible to understand or there's a significant barrier to communication due to slang. My husband & I are much better at understanding certain accents b/c of working or calling local food places so much. This isn't true everywhere, though. Even a Pakistani co-worker of my husband's doesn't like dealing w/tech support people outside of the US so that has to tell you something.

A company doing this could make a killing in getting new customers, employing lots of unemployed people & getting great PR. I know the outsourcing craze w/IT has apparently ended due to slipshod work; I await that for document review in the legal field, though I have no personal stake in the matter & left the one assignment I went on after the person in charge dared to ban people from going to the break room a few floors down from the work space. Don't put ME in a Wal-Mart type job atmosphere; I'm the sort who'll come in w/guns blazing if you push me too far. I also tend to inspire people not to take BS, freely talk to others to compare notes & am more than willing to assert myself if someone dares to mess w/me. If you messed w/me & you have me handling your food, I'm just the type who'd tamper w/it. Guess it's a good thing I've never been a waitress, never had to go through hazing in my sorority days or worked w/anyone who dared to play power games w/me--I freely admit to having a temper & holding grudges.

My tolerance for BS has decreased even further since I went to law school. Doing what I do in the entertainment business demands a backbone; you can't enforce policies or keep people in line if you're not firm or matter of fact. Sweetness & light is for the South; if you expect it from a lawyer or in the entertainment business, you need to get out. Even a Southern lawyer isn't going to take nonsense from people & half the time people are being sweet to you down there, they're cutting you down behind your back. Take it from someone who lived there close to 20 years.

To solve this in the future, I'm looking into getting a laptop for business when we've got the money. However, this is exactly why everyone should have a friend who's a computer expert. Even better if you manage to date one; I got a free computer from a GA Tech guy I dated who did coding for a living & cared that my PC was messing up on me. That was the only good thing I got out of that relationship, though. My views on relationships could support a stand up routine or a novel.