tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5356313680643348372024-03-13T09:03:46.908-07:00The Angry Redheaded LawyerRants & raves from a redheaded lawyer w/an unusual career: one where she can be herself online!Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.comBlogger525125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-66408050908113371332024-01-07T15:25:00.000-08:002024-01-07T15:25:45.919-08:00The Surreal Adventures of The Angry Redheaded Lawyer: "Killin' Republicans", a Rock Opera at Theater for the New CityIf you knew me, you might wonder “why would she go to a show called this?” Isn’t she from a conservative atmosphere and not a big fan of leftists? Hi, I’ve lived in NYC for over 15 years and never said I was a devotee to one team or the other. I’m the one who’s been saying BOTH of them are the problem and remain a registered Independent who thinks the only way to fix these issues is to get money out of politics. Also, I have a sense of humor and appreciate humor based in some honesty.
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The setup of this show is very cool since you literally got checked in by the dedicated flight attendants, got a very cool ticket stub and the airplane set was great. Careful attention was paid to getting it right and it definitely took me to my experience riding first class recently with the comfy seating. For some reason, the subway was packed on my way to this show and more like what you’d expect during weekday rush hour vs. a Saturday evening. Fortunately, I hadn’t missed anything and we were treated to a live band playing as the show got started.<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJtje_LWDO53aMkV1znvYIJVLodR7GzP193ePKhm42oAYddoNUDiYo3nem5Hv1vPsXGyGtsTNg5fGy5LCTMC43tJzoXbQeQ0Wpz6-XWA1x2GvNqLv3HzK5l_juCg0W7nnBPhaN5mgeDx0ufnRKa8LxBwG4klsxgkWMih4Bjo9K6j-0cc7OZzoswpBiwds/s4352/Inside%20Airplane.JPG" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="3264" data-original-width="4352" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJtje_LWDO53aMkV1znvYIJVLodR7GzP193ePKhm42oAYddoNUDiYo3nem5Hv1vPsXGyGtsTNg5fGy5LCTMC43tJzoXbQeQ0Wpz6-XWA1x2GvNqLv3HzK5l_juCg0W7nnBPhaN5mgeDx0ufnRKa8LxBwG4klsxgkWMih4Bjo9K6j-0cc7OZzoswpBiwds/s320/Inside%20Airplane.JPG"/></a></div>
<i>Abby Gumpper, Gabriel Wilkler, Ava Jones. Photo by Jonathan Slaff</i>
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Right before the show started (thankfully I had time to settle and find a good seat), we were told there’d been tech issues. Sadly, I wasn’t able to hear as much of the show because of difficulties hearing most of the actors as the music played but I did catch the gist of the show. However, the actress playing Goodness Gracious (Queen Koleurz) was not someone I had trouble hearing and her character was awesome. She's also got a fun and entertaining mate in BillyBob from Biloix (Edwin Vazquez).<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_XoUuHLV7UJ8U4zJbUGfsiqfL6Fn7rVllS8WlwtJ_S0LMJnC_FPz5VBfSFDK85c6oXHC_BRe6CsNFiRaHPUJo7TzzEOo5UFdwja4KBSz1sQleBjBGNJrpOcHSfE11P2XaK-UK7brRXV1EpmwruXxFKTWh37uzzMtWkwMMObs3zH2Pt_MLnoh8QgPXiTs/s3688/Goodness%20Gracious%20and%20Billbob.JPG" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="3264" data-original-width="3688" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_XoUuHLV7UJ8U4zJbUGfsiqfL6Fn7rVllS8WlwtJ_S0LMJnC_FPz5VBfSFDK85c6oXHC_BRe6CsNFiRaHPUJo7TzzEOo5UFdwja4KBSz1sQleBjBGNJrpOcHSfE11P2XaK-UK7brRXV1EpmwruXxFKTWh37uzzMtWkwMMObs3zH2Pt_MLnoh8QgPXiTs/s320/Goodness%20Gracious%20and%20Billbob.JPG"/></a></div>
<i>Queen Kolurez and Edwin Vazquez. Photo by Jonathan Slaff</i>
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Our flight attendants/ticket takers (Ava Jones and Gabriel Winker) also deserve recognition as they definitely played those parts well and when I came in, I wasn’t aware they were going to be performing in the show complete with great dance moves. I’d simply thought someone had put in far more detail to the audience experience than I’ve seen in my years of acting in or attending theater shows; it’s a simple detail that probably should happen more often since it was memorable and definitely helped set the tone and feel of the show.
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The attention to detail continued in the prop design. One prop that I thought was cool was the Abe Lincoln hat that when it opened, had a brain pop out in bits. This particular piece was the work of <a href="www.erinmathewson.com" target="_blank">Erin Mathewson</a>.
<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9iXeE3UGno2_ufrn-OslQHV1viqRlnSisVfFWuPm_2USWoFjRYb4ifEpQEyPx6FCGDXgqf_PwvT0aeq7eZGDYt1pIrj1JJLK4u8NFFprTsvv4wEljl8yqELKMkwznoYAYKJPPsXS8LiIP4CipkpHeZv1Ki4Oh-B0_-1769FSLz9pIr26EkGAiQo8Wgcc/s4352/Abe%20Lincoln%20Hat.JPG" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="3264" data-original-width="4352" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9iXeE3UGno2_ufrn-OslQHV1viqRlnSisVfFWuPm_2USWoFjRYb4ifEpQEyPx6FCGDXgqf_PwvT0aeq7eZGDYt1pIrj1JJLK4u8NFFprTsvv4wEljl8yqELKMkwznoYAYKJPPsXS8LiIP4CipkpHeZv1Ki4Oh-B0_-1769FSLz9pIr26EkGAiQo8Wgcc/s320/Abe%20Lincoln%20Hat.JPG"/></a></div><i>Queen Koleurz Koluchi as Abe Lincoln. Photo by Jonathan Slaff</i>
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Now I’m curious if real life Jodie Foster has heard about this show or had any comment about John Hinkley Jr. If she did, I’m pretty sure the song she sings proclaiming “Why Me” wouldn’t be off base. This show’s Jodie Foster (Abby Grumpper) also knows how to rock and definitely had moves that belied her image. If real life Jodie Foster has the moves, I’m sure she’d be happy that someone has acknowledged them in this show.
<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgo55rnVVIkwnWVXBC8u_enTnfHC_AUsaoEgfsr2uPpaR5lRRUVreiznOeGfy7zIcmRWEpYTXgc161cuLJWCzkDZ91O-20109uEi5RLuGjZdht8y_UnQTpQ7Hx4r8OtfJBzwRz9Ab0rQSIFWVPXkvpJUnWgWrgd6-RLFui5NLpvlDLynJHlkmqgz0jUCVg/s4136/Jodie%20Foster.JPG" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" height="320" data-original-height="4136" data-original-width="2744" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgo55rnVVIkwnWVXBC8u_enTnfHC_AUsaoEgfsr2uPpaR5lRRUVreiznOeGfy7zIcmRWEpYTXgc161cuLJWCzkDZ91O-20109uEi5RLuGjZdht8y_UnQTpQ7Hx4r8OtfJBzwRz9Ab0rQSIFWVPXkvpJUnWgWrgd6-RLFui5NLpvlDLynJHlkmqgz0jUCVg/s320/Jodie%20Foster.JPG"/></a></div><i>Abby Gumpper as Jodie Foster. Behind: Ava Jones. Photo by Jonathan Slaff</i>
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If you read the title and think this show is only about bashing Republicans, you’d be off the mark. This show does offer historical accuracy though I wonder if the airplane and general flight experience is a commentary on today’s Republican party. After all, the announcements are how many would describe a lot of their experiences and perceptions of the far right element (such as the plane arriving nowhere near where anyone needs to go and the general passengers being lucky they even get oxygen to breathe while on the flight). Maybe it’s a case of “the more things change…” and how history repeats itself? Nonetheless, I think the last song “Don’t Kill Republicans” is the best support for showing anyone of any party could find enjoyment in this show.Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-7951955772130955372023-06-23T14:25:00.002-07:002023-06-23T14:26:04.719-07:00The Surreal Adventures of The Angry Redheaded Lawyer: “Misconceptions” at 122CC Theater by Blessed Unrest My interest in seeing this show came about for a few reasons. There’s the obvious, my being a childfree person and having recently seen a documentary called “<a href="https://myselfishlife.com/" target="_blank">My So-Called Selfish Life</a>” for the second time. As some may or may not know, I got a tubal ligation at 26 years old after a major battle with trying to find someone willing to do it. I made that choice since I’ve always been career oriented and working in 2 fields that aren’t known for being child friendly; I’m not even sure law or entertainment have become more child friendly since that time but my story didn’t even happen in the 20th century or further back in time. I’d hoped a woman in 2023 trying to get voluntary sterilization would have an easier time of it now but apparently, that’s not happening.
<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJ0xY8W0sAi05Tn50uTd8nbQGit0A3xTpNzjRrItoU-BGGLFjKZKHGDuvxan8Z9mRAf0zp8MxlNzdtIhJ9-Qf6h3XuLU1BYcJSHbQAJJG_kOMZ1sLNJRCrk6469_T8TmDFdEeWIK4uSlfw11dq5IDIu_DR0_OmlSUGJn_uhvkl1Ctxx6eHvUJUieSmmlM/s800/Baby%20Killer.jpg" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="534" data-original-width="800" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJ0xY8W0sAi05Tn50uTd8nbQGit0A3xTpNzjRrItoU-BGGLFjKZKHGDuvxan8Z9mRAf0zp8MxlNzdtIhJ9-Qf6h3XuLU1BYcJSHbQAJJG_kOMZ1sLNJRCrk6469_T8TmDFdEeWIK4uSlfw11dq5IDIu_DR0_OmlSUGJn_uhvkl1Ctxx6eHvUJUieSmmlM/s320/Baby%20Killer.jpg"/></a></div><i>Photo by Maria Baranova</i>
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So this brings us to “Misconceptions,” the story of a young artist named Harriet (Hilary Dennis) who finds herself pregnant and having to decide what she’s going to do. She has a daughter named Alicia already and the father of this pregnancy, Jorge (Sean Mana) is a guy who seems to mean well but his track record hasn’t been ideal. Harriet also has reservations about forsaking her artistic career as she is gaining more public prominence while Jorge decides he wants to step up and be a full time father, ready to embrace the suburban narrative of the white picket fence, 2.3 kids and so forth.
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Darcelle (Celli Pitt), Harriet’s agent and close friend has to school Harriet on a few facts related to abortion and the historical experiences of women of color as Harriet decides to explore this topic in an effort to decide what she’s going to do about her own pregnancy. If you’ve read Toni Morrison’s book “Beloved” (like I did in undergrad and college), you may be surprised to know that there was a real life Sethe though that story didn’t go into details as to what that woman’s motivation was; she was simply arrested & confessed. I will not disclose the details of Sethe’s story since you can read “Beloved” for yourself but it presents a very pertinent idea and notion that’s very true for the time of slavery. Harriet presumes Darcelle being a lesbian will never encounter unwanted pregnancy and hasn’t thus far. However, the truth is far harsher than Harriet even knows.
<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTGuYCO3c8x4AK600U3ezMwetDpZAScRhoqM3vqyoOE-yo9VjI4bs2Y_CthsjuhCiRDhoImIUQlOvMeYF9egS5I_xzs-t3GCkE5SZsMWWORmBSv4uF-12oirtmFGGKIXqPASmL20kDu6sWKFETPR6-fGCJ0aJRoYf_l_oTwqx9EZjmBIeNUQJdWGgz9P4/s800/Shot%20of%20Real%20Life%20Sethe.jpg" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="534" data-original-width="800" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTGuYCO3c8x4AK600U3ezMwetDpZAScRhoqM3vqyoOE-yo9VjI4bs2Y_CthsjuhCiRDhoImIUQlOvMeYF9egS5I_xzs-t3GCkE5SZsMWWORmBSv4uF-12oirtmFGGKIXqPASmL20kDu6sWKFETPR6-fGCJ0aJRoYf_l_oTwqx9EZjmBIeNUQJdWGgz9P4/s320/Shot%20of%20Real%20Life%20Sethe.jpg"/></a></div><i>Photo by Maria Baranova</i>
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The staging for this show was very cool since it was a 360 view. The director, Jessica Burr, introduced the show and did the most humorous money ask I’ve ever seen. Writer Steve Wangh also puts some elements of humor into the show aside from the seriousness of the topic and I feel like he covered the perspectives of both sides quite well with a conversational style though both this and “My So-Called Selfish Life” don’t examine my specific take on this subject or how I argue it with people. There were even a couple meta moments like Harriet exploring writing a stage play based on her project with abortion as she’s talking to people on all sides of the spectrum.
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This also marks the first time I ever saw an actor (Perri Yaniv) come out from underneath the audience seating to get onstage. He does this to play the fetus. In one segment, a pro-life attorney (Rich Brown) tries to get the fetus’s take on whether it would like to be born or not. The pro-life attorney goes into the arguments you typically hear from the pro-life crowd and asks about existence, a concept far over the head of this fetus who’s simply hanging out. This imagining also marks a first and is probably accurate to what would happen in real life since how would a fetus be able to contemplate living independently and outside a womb?
<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6fyiGTvPsX_6PbQYO16MHwIzHYOQMB60yvbxO8sQF8OBOE9QSUV_ypaca2Scme8aG96yYHzyRjdA_2IwFv2sDs1MI2j_pT8hD07LrQTbafQC9gAHfrAtrpWxx6pfkw-_UhuVwTcwNvIJkomhJwHluBIkakfQrYFsMbccxtHyA-O5m6Kw06vmf_B9t0K0/s800/Fetus%20Questioning.jpg" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="534" data-original-width="800" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6fyiGTvPsX_6PbQYO16MHwIzHYOQMB60yvbxO8sQF8OBOE9QSUV_ypaca2Scme8aG96yYHzyRjdA_2IwFv2sDs1MI2j_pT8hD07LrQTbafQC9gAHfrAtrpWxx6pfkw-_UhuVwTcwNvIJkomhJwHluBIkakfQrYFsMbccxtHyA-O5m6Kw06vmf_B9t0K0/s320/Fetus%20Questioning.jpg"/></a></div><i>Rich Brown (Pro-Life Attorney), Hilary Denis (Harriet) and Peri Yaniv (Fetus). Photo by Maria Baranova</i>
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Overall, I feel like this show covered the spectrum of views on the subject and wouldn’t totally alienate conservative types. After all, Harriet’s own mother (Ethelyn Friend) even showed empathy for her even though she was said to be a conservative pro-life type. However, it would not be the show to take young children and would be more appropriate for adults or older teenagers you’ve had the abortion conversation with.Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-30594422796481407912023-06-03T13:26:00.003-07:002023-06-03T13:26:36.090-07:00The Surreal Adventures of The Angry Redheaded Lawyer: "Bliss Street" at Theater for the New City in association with Sound Dog Properties* As an FYI, apparently Blogger has gone woke and is engaging in censorship. Eventually, I may move to another platform that's not endorsing corporate censorship and has no concept of humor or artistic context to make a point. Not to mention there's no protected category for stupidity not related to a clinical diagnosis of mental illness or hypocrisy (which has no mental illness diagnosis to mitigate it unless we're talking about being brainwashed & that's not really a mental illness per se). Oh, and it's not a LAWYER'S job to co-opt woke narratives or march in lockstep with the PC police; we're the people who care about the laws as written and applied to all, not specific groups leftists have decided to give passes to (which simply furthers discrimination and problems those groups experience). That being said, let's begin the review:
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This show caught my attention based on its setting. The location has a personal significance to me but you only get to know what it is if you actually know me in real life. I will say it represents a clean slate and a new beginning away from some bad stuff. Which I suppose is where we can begin this review.
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The Sub patriarch, Paul (Jeff Canter), is a man just trying to catch a break in the world of entrepreneurship while taking care of his devoted family in the Upper East Side. He goes through a couple failed businesses before we get to Coventry, the club where many of the greats got their start. If you’re familiar with the history, I’m not going to give you that here. That particular task is for our guide through it all Ethyl who enlightens us at her own spot (Ethyl’s) where the show is rocking and the story is brought to life.
<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGjsQufCh4pSKWO_thrADooSeolyoScY5BsXw7_HaM4Bk4S9AyNMUi2ffUV-lhGS6WJSY1qMA81MCNbQhHaCwJKnhlMbgl-USBtqSZXxl8VQotkq013pM4yFtNrqeg0ag9flusLqgW22kSetrbBXzpmhbkF0qgPGwgHaKfcQ_GhNaPHfHYi4wRQJpO/s4352/Ethyl%27s.JPG" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="3264" data-original-width="4352" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGjsQufCh4pSKWO_thrADooSeolyoScY5BsXw7_HaM4Bk4S9AyNMUi2ffUV-lhGS6WJSY1qMA81MCNbQhHaCwJKnhlMbgl-USBtqSZXxl8VQotkq013pM4yFtNrqeg0ag9flusLqgW22kSetrbBXzpmhbkF0qgPGwgHaKfcQ_GhNaPHfHYi4wRQJpO/s320/Ethyl%27s.JPG"/></a></div><i>Photo by Jonathan Slaff</i>
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A special shout out to Sarah MacDonnell who sets the scene and presents this tale with wit, humor and accessibility to the TikTok and social media set who often can’t be drawn away from that world so easily. This particular performance had a wait list and that may have been specifically to see Sarah if the conversations I heard were an indication of her appeal to the audience. Seating was quite a challenge, an event I haven’t seen so much in my reviewing tenure. I’m also not sure if Theater for the New City no longer reserves seats for press though I prefer to slip in unnoticed on general principle.
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Abra Bigham’s script is informative while also humorous. I definitely saw places where I laughed such as the reference to Paul as the “big boss man” (which made me think of the movie “Office Space” which some may know is one of my favorite movies of all time as well as influential on how I structured my career). The costuming was awesome as well as the scenery and usage of the projector screen set up where you didn’t feel like things were cut off or confusing.<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZ4wR11edkVlRMS4Pps0KKcZyBv3Wbf2pKmGh_Lg0SZpapXcKMhXq35ZapCTGuhLvsMzEVWtWRlqx0kfch9AVkjcuAP09m4HiF-M_4rrfMs6Od1FhGKcrKMrlSIxa7I_TV3nAOEOUmeiZckPU4VV776bhQ0MasuY08UQ1JnkaOVdJLp5Uon0WpIEv2/s4352/Costuming%20Example.JPG" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="3264" data-original-width="4352" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZ4wR11edkVlRMS4Pps0KKcZyBv3Wbf2pKmGh_Lg0SZpapXcKMhXq35ZapCTGuhLvsMzEVWtWRlqx0kfch9AVkjcuAP09m4HiF-M_4rrfMs6Od1FhGKcrKMrlSIxa7I_TV3nAOEOUmeiZckPU4VV776bhQ0MasuY08UQ1JnkaOVdJLp5Uon0WpIEv2/s320/Costuming%20Example.JPG"/></a></div><i>Various cast members. Photo by Jonathan Slaff</i>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhODv3ijPLIjQkCKmwHu6FAMeYbsZ9lms40RN3sKoZTmLfHDZWgwacnky3FO0YDfXuhN4nVKQ41IfC1F8_6OgYKXO_N4IASUFuG9z6WuLVbnrf5IeYJp6y5CoATRJcCyCxMJCUPMi0JanBMDOqP8eVSrRHoDh4bhu_PHtuYYYTEPTdzFswxuJD9Ksu4/s4352/Coventry%20Poster.JPG" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="3264" data-original-width="4352" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhODv3ijPLIjQkCKmwHu6FAMeYbsZ9lms40RN3sKoZTmLfHDZWgwacnky3FO0YDfXuhN4nVKQ41IfC1F8_6OgYKXO_N4IASUFuG9z6WuLVbnrf5IeYJp6y5CoATRJcCyCxMJCUPMi0JanBMDOqP8eVSrRHoDh4bhu_PHtuYYYTEPTdzFswxuJD9Ksu4/s320/Coventry%20Poster.JPG"/></a></div><i>Posters for The Coventry. Photo by Jonathan Slaff</i>
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Louie (Milo Longenecker), the guy who came with the Coventry’s previous previous incarnation and never spoke but definitely needed his time off was great. He didn’t have to speak but simply provided comic relief with his mere movements and presence in the scenes. This was even more presence at Charlie’s (Blaize Alder-Ivanbroo) birthday party where I kept wondering if he was going to hit the birthday cake or lose his balance. Physical comedy is an underappreciated skill that really deserves more credit. On his birthday (his 25th), Charlie’s family gifts him with a burial plot. Talk about a mix of practicality and maybe a morbid sense of humor.<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0YJldoKJOYzNyImQkzsY13e82mGkfCotw1dEOE-KjRix5ibCn3n4eWTdL3jj_zMfDPyYsnJDJI8ZKX_0b2TbvUbXSYDFUvHVIJanWvuaQ0u8cEwyS5853UdiFezY0vezWmytE_-q4973CEkFmhg0m9fobdotALeUNFJi-YC0OCliY6O12PBAys96X/s4352/Louie.JPG" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="3264" data-original-width="4352" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0YJldoKJOYzNyImQkzsY13e82mGkfCotw1dEOE-KjRix5ibCn3n4eWTdL3jj_zMfDPyYsnJDJI8ZKX_0b2TbvUbXSYDFUvHVIJanWvuaQ0u8cEwyS5853UdiFezY0vezWmytE_-q4973CEkFmhg0m9fobdotALeUNFJi-YC0OCliY6O12PBAys96X/s320/Louie.JPG"/></a></div><i>L-R: Alyson Reim, Blaize Adler-Ivanbrook, Milo Longenecker, Jef Canter. Photo by Jonathan Slaff</i>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXNfugUCKWHUZXmdvgGxb_dXRyTvRe3WK1mv7-IE357sCV4kvgLZXHuEva6Y4DtTa9hiDzlfEHiURRIzMmvbTDBMc3fDD8MoXSUI9xbqgo1zMuG_an6eUvCftPdesed-2GJnVwYSPlEnXP6-YN6Qz5NIFQd39SYL_1wUPuXgektsUpd_-5ooJoQ1Qm/s4352/Charlie%27s%20Birthday%20Party.JPG" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="3264" data-original-width="4352" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXNfugUCKWHUZXmdvgGxb_dXRyTvRe3WK1mv7-IE357sCV4kvgLZXHuEva6Y4DtTa9hiDzlfEHiURRIzMmvbTDBMc3fDD8MoXSUI9xbqgo1zMuG_an6eUvCftPdesed-2GJnVwYSPlEnXP6-YN6Qz5NIFQd39SYL_1wUPuXgektsUpd_-5ooJoQ1Qm/s320/Charlie%27s%20Birthday%20Party.JPG"/></a></div><i>Charlie (Blaize Adler-Ivanbrook) is presented a deed to his burial plot. Photo by Jonathan Slaff</i>
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It reminded me of when my sister’s first husband died and we were going to his funeral. My mom joked that when my father died, she’d have to make sure the casket didn’t come out until about 15 minutes after the funeral started and he’d have to have his pants unzipped while holding a Burger King bag. She didn’t actually do this when my father passed about 10 years later but we got a good laugh out of that imagery.
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The characters in this show were quite interesting: there’s Charlie of course the son trying so hard to make his band “Cliff and the Pits” happen but life just was not helping him as his front man Cliff (Thomas Deen Baker) had a nervous breakdown, his father was not about to give them stage time and in the wake of the nervous breakdown the other band members felt it was time to move on, his mother Mina (Alyson Reim) who kept everything together and Mandy (Alisa Ermolaev), the California girlfriend with more sunlight aversion than even yours truly (and you know most natural redheads go from pale to lobster in 20 minutes or less without sunblock).<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTVHghoBK9O387gyvkBE9JIrkADmNPekPv-PXVn2BwUF4dp16jYFW5Rv-yuqDtfk-Wq-Z1u_YsW3wLPWO3A6yGcXf-6nLN4VP6FkT9SmOwtqgYG-b_-Z-JoTFgcSEmByOMo5aY0lk6kNYOaUJWhFHWuodb3hXw6IfZGrsDoc8ZS3UWko6hUVpVWP3G/s4352/Cliff.JPG" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="3264" data-original-width="4352" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTVHghoBK9O387gyvkBE9JIrkADmNPekPv-PXVn2BwUF4dp16jYFW5Rv-yuqDtfk-Wq-Z1u_YsW3wLPWO3A6yGcXf-6nLN4VP6FkT9SmOwtqgYG-b_-Z-JoTFgcSEmByOMo5aY0lk6kNYOaUJWhFHWuodb3hXw6IfZGrsDoc8ZS3UWko6hUVpVWP3G/s320/Cliff.JPG"/></a></div><i>Thomas Dean Baker. Photo by Jonathan Slaff</i>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfk_y8IPskjT3RUJcGxhpo8qb0zS64azatrpryXUVGGMQ9-LcANvta2s8e11UsoEBimJpuvdHzpGZVy1FmVq9VF4D73u-oJuqvdwG8xh-eEXXEZbPOYBsOh7kNT-DzOvxbR8fHbcoVqvi1gcNFOPCcuP7yO7muVsoInLP_cnjuTOewUoHzV4lXMDja/s4352/Mom%20with%20Charlie.JPG" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" height="320" data-original-height="4352" data-original-width="3264" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfk_y8IPskjT3RUJcGxhpo8qb0zS64azatrpryXUVGGMQ9-LcANvta2s8e11UsoEBimJpuvdHzpGZVy1FmVq9VF4D73u-oJuqvdwG8xh-eEXXEZbPOYBsOh7kNT-DzOvxbR8fHbcoVqvi1gcNFOPCcuP7yO7muVsoInLP_cnjuTOewUoHzV4lXMDja/s320/Mom%20with%20Charlie.JPG"/></a></div><i>Blaize Adler-Ivanbrook, Alyson Reim. Photo by Jonathan Slaff</i>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgExVy3OzPFEliBf0nT9hjSASF1erbGbghaRU6LT2hmKjng2fKjck85Ngs73pbcfIUgiFpcpjBEYH2H5h8Sxrp6zWh1h6IUuhUKWF8IIteIsXM9ExsyTRod_5jOFrfA2ETA03VVyjbdio6YUrO5M9NO2CzrTCk9OBDPpf01Z0NhFjAM5SDT0IaLq0Vo/s4352/Mandy.JPG" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="3264" data-original-width="4352" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgExVy3OzPFEliBf0nT9hjSASF1erbGbghaRU6LT2hmKjng2fKjck85Ngs73pbcfIUgiFpcpjBEYH2H5h8Sxrp6zWh1h6IUuhUKWF8IIteIsXM9ExsyTRod_5jOFrfA2ETA03VVyjbdio6YUrO5M9NO2CzrTCk9OBDPpf01Z0NhFjAM5SDT0IaLq0Vo/s320/Mandy.JPG"/></a></div><i>Blaize Adler-Ivanbrook, Alisa Ermolaev. Photo by Jonathan Slaff</i>
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After the show, I was happy to meet the real life Charlie Sub who was in attendance and whose life was being portrayed onstage. He struck me as a relatable, good guy whose family raised him well and would appreciate how they were portrayed in this show.<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEfHYfPW65Zghbe2-71v8l2BtTK7JO6Bkth0G-0FemP-2s_kQT-UHTY3NyQ1JcK_VL5ew-2KA4o1lzP6PFT7TabUX2YA40UgZaBUEwYujp9kaEjbq8ZDNHW3zm4VVvMxe-bQNtQundl3CjEu7J7SLvg6lCYHAOcb7WtoN7YEGLTnrZBT9ToFF2qvEN/s4352/Parents.JPG" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="3264" data-original-width="4352" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEfHYfPW65Zghbe2-71v8l2BtTK7JO6Bkth0G-0FemP-2s_kQT-UHTY3NyQ1JcK_VL5ew-2KA4o1lzP6PFT7TabUX2YA40UgZaBUEwYujp9kaEjbq8ZDNHW3zm4VVvMxe-bQNtQundl3CjEu7J7SLvg6lCYHAOcb7WtoN7YEGLTnrZBT9ToFF2qvEN/s320/Parents.JPG"/></a></div><i>Jeff Canter, Alyson Reim. Photo by Jonathan Slaff</i>
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Overall, this was an entertaining, engaging and educational show that I enjoyed seeing especially with the +1 I selected who it turned out had more connection and interest with this show than I knew about when I initially invited him. He’s also a bit of a Lower East Side celebrity in his own right so that experience made the night even better for me. I wouldn’t bring little kids but I think teens on up and especially people who know this era would get a kick out of it.Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-3417852180176166512022-08-14T15:04:00.001-07:002022-08-14T18:32:29.667-07:00The Surreal Adventures of The Angry Redheaded Lawyer: “Love Quirks” by Love Quirks LLCIf you want to get insight on the NYC cynic, go see this show ASAP. Get the soundtrack and definitely listen to the songs. After all, our heroes reside in NYC.
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This is a show about quite literally the “quirks” of love: the good, the bad and the ugly. Chris (Matthew Schatz) has been recently cheated on by his fiancée so their engagement is off. Ryan (Erin Lamar) is his gay pal who harbors a maybe not so secret crush that everyone except Chris has picked up on while suffering his own relationship troubles. Lili (Maggie McDowell) is the militant anti-man feminist who had her heart shattered by Ryan’s homosexuality and Stephanie (Lauren Testerman) is a woman going through a divorce and consulting with a therapist while having to deal with the unwelcome arrival of Chris. This group, who has a history but we only hear bits and pieces about it, is trying to sort out their lives in the wake of breakups and heartache against the backdrop of NYC, where the romance atheists and agnostics far outweigh the romance faithful.
<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9OC1ZWshQq_HIipSgqwXmMBNZBw7DKIvxDUOlxanugMxa6fNX7gL2K7ju2rw7eSOUMaI3RVh3CPgjgEXClByL1ug_5cQqEUK3wF_QpioQ-CLB2xAPp4Ypiq4wyDA3D6DqbQ-fEaQ6uXKHxT9Lii9qQoX2pHwRaJqa2rjYMyDnsSJc7HEWTJUhKUvD/s1080/Full%20Cast.png" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="608" data-original-width="1080" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9OC1ZWshQq_HIipSgqwXmMBNZBw7DKIvxDUOlxanugMxa6fNX7gL2K7ju2rw7eSOUMaI3RVh3CPgjgEXClByL1ug_5cQqEUK3wF_QpioQ-CLB2xAPp4Ypiq4wyDA3D6DqbQ-fEaQ6uXKHxT9Lii9qQoX2pHwRaJqa2rjYMyDnsSJc7HEWTJUhKUvD/s320/Full%20Cast.png"/></a></div><i>Lauren Testerman, Erin Lamar, Matthew Schatz and Maggie McDowell. Photo by Mark Childers</i>
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When you step into the AMT Theater, it’s a mix of the modern and the underground. You get the air conditioning and wonderful seating as the modern while the side walls indicate the underground. The blend works very well here and I encourage those of you putting on shows to consider this venue since your audience hates sweltering in the summer (certainly if they’re Southern natives like yours truly).
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The opening song alone is worth the price of admission and the music gets even better from there. A special shoutout has to go to Seth Bisen-Hersh for that. If he doesn’t have some stories relating to this show, I’d be shocked since some of these lyrics feel like things you have to have lived in order to come up with them.
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Credit also must go to writer Mark Childers and director Brian Childers since this show reminded me of both “Friends” and “Reality Bites” but unlike those projects, this one had diversity in Ryan (a black gay man). In fact, Ryan kind of reminded me of one of my roommates who’s very similar but to my knowledge didn’t date any women who’d had marriage designs on him before he came out or live as roommates with them in the years following that declaration.
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I also loved hearing someone else use the term “cater waiter” since the only person I’ve heard use it was the Model Flake, who told me he was tired of being a “cater waiter.” Chris reminded me of a more functional version of the Model Flake though Chris was apparently a college jock, not a male model. One scene in particular definitely reminded me of what Vickie in “Reality Bites” says to the leads who are flirting with “will they, won’t they” and bugging everyone around them with it.
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I also wonder if the writers read a particular Cosmopolitan magazine article I heard about many years back concerning a particular sex position my sorority sisters spent a lot of time debating on whether it was actually possible to execute. Is “pinwheel” code for “passion propeller”??? I actually discussed this tale with the gentleman I brought with me to the show since that scene brought back the memory (my verdict was it’s not possible and if it were, the guy would be injured in a very uncomfortable way).
<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQJgeHa9vvBiMfAgAKvHdvKrPCPJ0SFt03KpAMOIGOHYgtAojwlDseAP4R-F0Nqn0vHCiyB8Nxv7Qdhi0WB84LXxE7Eednzyme9LZg8q-D2pwTuK1m0MhWqzPadr-AphbZHSJ58aV0DdMej-0Q1MptqMpCZibH_rrqSFBYqs0uQjBjIP8h5Pvg2pVA/s1080/Sex%20Talk.png" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="608" data-original-width="1080" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQJgeHa9vvBiMfAgAKvHdvKrPCPJ0SFt03KpAMOIGOHYgtAojwlDseAP4R-F0Nqn0vHCiyB8Nxv7Qdhi0WB84LXxE7Eednzyme9LZg8q-D2pwTuK1m0MhWqzPadr-AphbZHSJ58aV0DdMej-0Q1MptqMpCZibH_rrqSFBYqs0uQjBjIP8h5Pvg2pVA/s320/Sex%20Talk.png"/></a></div><i>Lauren Testerman and Matthew Schatz. Photo by Mark Childers.</i>
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However, this show had a slide show presentation that probably should have been planned a little better with the screen set up. It was a little distracting to have a large black line in the center as this was showing background in telling the story. I also hope our actors weren’t consuming actual alcohol during this show; I’m still not certain since there was a scene where one character is opening a bottle and it looks like she’s opening a fresh bottle. I’d have hated to be them doing so many shows and rehearsals where drinking is called for since eventually someone would have gotten sick or maybe developed alcohol poisoning. I didn’t see anyone have ill effects but a true professional never lets the audience see them sweat or will seamlessly integrate whatever mishap occurs into the action so the audience is none the wiser. The use of the balcony in this show was also new and I think added to the story, perhaps even making the action a bit more inclusive for those who didn’t have front row seating. Supposedly this theater has second floor seating but I wasn’t sitting there. If anyone was, it’s nice that the staging took that into account.
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This show is tailormade for any of us who didn’t meet our soulmate in childhood and are still with them to this day (by the way, we all hate you) so that covers a huge group: divorced people, cynical NYC dwellers, the “nice guy” who never gets out of the friendzone, the woman who can’t find a non-sleazy attractive guy to save her life or is dismissed for being too fat, a less popular ethnic minority, too old, too pretty, too interesting, too smart, whatever. Those of you who’ve been through a horrific breakup, especially if was recent, will really love this show and definitely want the soundtrack since the songs are fabulous. They have the cheeky irreverence of “Avenue Q,” a show that I hope hasn’t been ruined by the woke mob.
<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3it792lHqbSW22JZe07pDmF5Kw6nyc7qSCZNe_Y0bWs2GKYyfwo7-ViQOnsJi1egiw0HiverYRq4P8eM7_4bXNBM3vNHn9D1UVDh9ex-HzXyGpdQnaxPW1efxAkPp23EBs6bE43w_lpXZ-QJkpEhy9tg52DgMtk7UsePDmJLo6DPL09yhzJb5UXa9/s1080/Drinking.png" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="608" data-original-width="1080" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3it792lHqbSW22JZe07pDmF5Kw6nyc7qSCZNe_Y0bWs2GKYyfwo7-ViQOnsJi1egiw0HiverYRq4P8eM7_4bXNBM3vNHn9D1UVDh9ex-HzXyGpdQnaxPW1efxAkPp23EBs6bE43w_lpXZ-QJkpEhy9tg52DgMtk7UsePDmJLo6DPL09yhzJb5UXa9/s320/Drinking.png"/></a></div><i>Lauren Testerman, Maggie McDowell, Matthew Schatz and Erin Lamar. Photo by Mark Childers</i>
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I came here with a guy that I’m still not quite sure is really interested in being exclusive with me or seeing me again after a subsequent travel excursion. I guess I’ll know in about a week when I lay down the law but for a moment there, I thought maybe there was hope after the devastation wrought on my heart by the Energizer Bunny. Maybe there still is since he said he did like the show and hasn’t seemed to attack me for being a cynical, jaded New Yorker since he grew up here himself….
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In short, you could let your cynical teens see this one but don’t bring your babies and toddlers. Otherwise, if you’ve ever been dumped, felt rejected by someone you adored or you’re suffering from a broken heart you should see this show at once since you’ll instantly feel better afterwards.Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-86130345781690839362022-07-18T09:39:00.001-07:002022-07-18T09:39:19.816-07:00The Surreal Adventures of The Angry Redheaded Lawyer: "The Winter's Tale" -- Shakespeare in the Parking Lot Presented by The Drilling Company and The ClementeYou might have thought the Surreal Adventures series was dead or even going to performances would be dead after the crazy 2+ years we’ve had.
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Well, life can surprise you sometimes. The pandemic, being out of NYC for most of 2020, an intense relationship with a guy who brought back feelings I thought died with my divorce and who continues to confuse me months after discarding me, learning that I indeed am not suited to work in the average law firm, finding my dream job and trying to get my own apartment once and for all….those are their own surreal adventures.
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I’d heard about shows starting again and knew I should get back out there but I suppose inertia, apartment hunting, emotional pain and general feelings of frustration and disconnection had been holding me back until I personally got an invite to see this one. This isn’t a show I had read or was familiar with despite being a Drama kid in high school and having an acting background so I had to read up on it to see if I might be able to review it properly. I could so off I went and here we are.
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First off, great move on the organizers to do this at 7 pm vs. prime time sunburn hours. This super pale natural redhead who burns in 2 seconds thanks you kindly. The parking lot at The Clemente also happened to have a shady area where seating was set up and where I sat so no worries I’d burn. This one is also an actual parking lot; I would never notice it was there if I hadn’t had the street address to look for. The entrance was quite subtle but the venue itself definitely had that Lower East Side city feel if you’re looking for that.
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When it got dark outside, the lights came on very gradually and I didn’t even notice the change so someone paid very good attention to this.
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Second, they had comfy chairs. This might have been because I was attending on a Thursday night but I had no issues with seating and kept some distance since I’d do that under normal circumstances.
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I read of this going into the modern age and I saw that in wardrobe and some of the staging. For example, this show starts with 2 characters in an arm wrestling match.
<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmOvy4igAlMKgXoE5vRqVwF2VkHb3Sf7ZKdHKTqseLlObXqwgDeUyzwJGX9XKtw2xnFWm3C-shb5Y-0TjWyWA9qTKbYqfsgKS3VJ1zPqE6sR6x34DeZNxqM7mRQE_KZGc9pd6IjNANtbPa2Y7w95eamt-OBkn4dTNZFvSva3jssMK1bfaNgLiSk06-/s1500/Arm%20Wrestling%20Pic.jpg" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="945" data-original-width="1500" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmOvy4igAlMKgXoE5vRqVwF2VkHb3Sf7ZKdHKTqseLlObXqwgDeUyzwJGX9XKtw2xnFWm3C-shb5Y-0TjWyWA9qTKbYqfsgKS3VJ1zPqE6sR6x34DeZNxqM7mRQE_KZGc9pd6IjNANtbPa2Y7w95eamt-OBkn4dTNZFvSva3jssMK1bfaNgLiSk06-/s320/Arm%20Wrestling%20Pic.jpg"/></a></div><i>Bradford Frost (Polixines) arm wrestles with Hamilton Clancy (Lenotes) . Behind: Jaan Rothschild, (Mammilius). Photo by Lee Wexler/Images for Innnovation</i>
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Tell me that doesn’t still happen in real life when you get guys involved in some kind of conflict. I suppose guys I dated never really did that but I know some might have straight up gone for throwing punches if they had to or told me they’d run away in the face of conflict. The doomed prince is also shown completely consumed on his smart phone while the interactions between his parents and his father’s suspicions of the pregnant Hermione’s fidelity grow as they interact with Polixines.
<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLb9CiKONPPzTIPuunlu8UV8A13ZvDf3dCcb-Htlh25wjhbi5n2Z4EYEaVsmy2zfBnSJdNZP19qkJMJxw8VrzpxP6KSEVZz5nHsHf1IjwGPx2a6HqTyzGekpLPwDFzLFG_Ke_RRaKcFPQF3GVj2p2aLCGfCTbZ0alYYEEw6B5ID2kuCTrsWkBd5_hG/s1500/Pic%20with%20Son%20on%20Phone.jpg" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="902" data-original-width="1500" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLb9CiKONPPzTIPuunlu8UV8A13ZvDf3dCcb-Htlh25wjhbi5n2Z4EYEaVsmy2zfBnSJdNZP19qkJMJxw8VrzpxP6KSEVZz5nHsHf1IjwGPx2a6HqTyzGekpLPwDFzLFG_Ke_RRaKcFPQF3GVj2p2aLCGfCTbZ0alYYEEw6B5ID2kuCTrsWkBd5_hG/s320/Pic%20with%20Son%20on%20Phone.jpg"/></a></div><i>L-R; Jaan Rothschild, Hamilton Clancy, Jane Bradley. Photo by Lee Wexler/Images for Innovation</i>
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9IcAQpSpGX0QnHV04hrpn94fPsBEBkR1H52zCJW6y5O1NCI3-Fdh8bGkDbpY1BzQZ9uXMRWMGAaXUgQnzy46PCZ5dbBqgQgdOEGaQRd5gD9ViFxHjemdwjd9sjaZ7ySnrE0gRUGLmZ6G9mIfDypGdRLLEGP6bOdIWWnQQgavI7sNUVtNauCxvQPQq/s1500/Suspicion.jpg" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="924" data-original-width="1500" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9IcAQpSpGX0QnHV04hrpn94fPsBEBkR1H52zCJW6y5O1NCI3-Fdh8bGkDbpY1BzQZ9uXMRWMGAaXUgQnzy46PCZ5dbBqgQgdOEGaQRd5gD9ViFxHjemdwjd9sjaZ7ySnrE0gRUGLmZ6G9mIfDypGdRLLEGP6bOdIWWnQQgavI7sNUVtNauCxvQPQq/s320/Suspicion.jpg"/></a></div><i>Hamilton Clancy, Bradford Frost, Jane Bradley. Photo by Lee Wexler/Images for Innovation</i>
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I’m also not sure if “my wife’s a hobby horse” is a line from the original Shakespeare but if it is, it only shows that Shakespeare’s work is just as relevant in the modern age as it was in the past. We certainly still have false accusations ruining people’s lives, people getting stuck in the middle of someone else's conflicts as Camillo was, people trying in vain to convince someone to see reason and have compassion for others, class conflicts in relationships, kids being blamed for things they had nothing to do with and people sticking to their stories even when contrary information no longer supporting them is presented in their faces.
<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCzNSjYiEy-8XISWOWzeSNAJsK-u-Fjv4RDmF1mPDx18KEycjibjEDohgj4RnVaCLbEeMBqVxD0nzpD0eJ8XGS57B-cFpA3bto3oBl3ulH7zFmjmccd-M6EiFs0rUdIiibowlphCEaPLIn72fRdvScUmwsN40vEwbFvbuOjt5l0TA6HCLgyHW8FdSX/s1500/On%20Trial.jpg" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="1062" data-original-width="1500" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCzNSjYiEy-8XISWOWzeSNAJsK-u-Fjv4RDmF1mPDx18KEycjibjEDohgj4RnVaCLbEeMBqVxD0nzpD0eJ8XGS57B-cFpA3bto3oBl3ulH7zFmjmccd-M6EiFs0rUdIiibowlphCEaPLIn72fRdvScUmwsN40vEwbFvbuOjt5l0TA6HCLgyHW8FdSX/s320/On%20Trial.jpg"/></a></div>Hamilton Clancy and Jane Bradley. Photo by Lee Wexler/Images for Innovation<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdWtOrFNQ8P4pEG3k0g1nIUvAcx-x-zK4V0_4iyYp2SDaTv5W4N4p6tDUn0VN2XNaBcOcwaSxUS-OLF1cGHotb-enAe1W9PAFc1ZnRyVN1fWYCNVhxnjybjhS0Xe9YY5l5pOi_DZHZNJP4REGHoHNMsTpV6rpc9g7PYjAoFXWKtm091BIIkEOx6L03/s4352/Camillo%20in%20the%20Middle.JPG" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="3264" data-original-width="4352" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdWtOrFNQ8P4pEG3k0g1nIUvAcx-x-zK4V0_4iyYp2SDaTv5W4N4p6tDUn0VN2XNaBcOcwaSxUS-OLF1cGHotb-enAe1W9PAFc1ZnRyVN1fWYCNVhxnjybjhS0Xe9YY5l5pOi_DZHZNJP4REGHoHNMsTpV6rpc9g7PYjAoFXWKtm091BIIkEOx6L03/s320/Camillo%20in%20the%20Middle.JPG"/></a></div><i>Jack Sochet, Bradford Frost. Photo by Jonathan Slaff</i><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9D1c3xg5mae_gYCG1M5QDBcdNJcLJ5I75yLaHPc1LH3bc-XEgBBjTXyMZ3QyHA6BPn6_ktPzwCuQjtz5wQmRGwX10tfuF6s3sK4wHuvfOcOStj_z-9_5AZjViVJdWiPPpHashAxHoeinJLiYWBArJ1gUkRIEr-HL-jx_XSRG_3lj-fVotLrQGX2KH/s1500/Appeals%20to%20Reason.jpg" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="836" data-original-width="1500" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9D1c3xg5mae_gYCG1M5QDBcdNJcLJ5I75yLaHPc1LH3bc-XEgBBjTXyMZ3QyHA6BPn6_ktPzwCuQjtz5wQmRGwX10tfuF6s3sK4wHuvfOcOStj_z-9_5AZjViVJdWiPPpHashAxHoeinJLiYWBArJ1gUkRIEr-HL-jx_XSRG_3lj-fVotLrQGX2KH/s320/Appeals%20to%20Reason.jpg"/></a></div><i>L-R: Bob Arcaro, Lisbeth Allen, Hamilton Clancy, Una Clancy. Photo by Lee Wexler/Images for Innovation</i>
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Contrary to some who say this play is “problematic” for Shakespeare’s work, I feel that maybe Shakespeare came to some heavy realizations later on in life that informed his final works (as this one is part of). I, for example, thought I had more of a goth sensibility until both my father and my ex-husband’s sister died within 1.5 months of each other and I had to go to the funerals almost back to back. I’ve also come to bigger realizations in my own life such as having far more maturity and restraint that I did when I was younger, being far less tolerant of roommate situations these days than I was in years past, not putting up with treatment from guys I’d have been okay with in the past, that sort of thing.
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Perhaps Shakespeare felt at the time he wrote this that life was a balance of tragedy and comedy and that both can exist in the universe of some play. Maybe he didn’t want to deal with all sadness all the time and wanted to give the audience some hope after you’ve had everything taken and you feel contrition for your bad behavior. Just my two cents.
<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCBQd3IQGFDsqEq4Z9JWTetouLRyFp5fIsdsp4e96WsDYLtP9GzShtKRBW1_WZ9PEEBSMkT1LZ6-fmsBta7Rcb-T54Dh5GdxAtNZtL7n255mGIuCRJu2w8fTc1jWfTvf1M3ifCSJnhMv1qIToXtMkwtaIdG6f3J5P0nmwZt-FjCQZf0CNQ0BBgMfNZ/s1500/End%20Scene.jpg" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="961" data-original-width="1500" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCBQd3IQGFDsqEq4Z9JWTetouLRyFp5fIsdsp4e96WsDYLtP9GzShtKRBW1_WZ9PEEBSMkT1LZ6-fmsBta7Rcb-T54Dh5GdxAtNZtL7n255mGIuCRJu2w8fTc1jWfTvf1M3ifCSJnhMv1qIToXtMkwtaIdG6f3J5P0nmwZt-FjCQZf0CNQ0BBgMfNZ/s320/End%20Scene.jpg"/></a></div><i>Photo by Lee Wexler/Images for Innovation</i>
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The costuming was definitely on point. I love the “I (heart symbol) (sheep symbol)” shirt the shepherd’s son was wearing. He and his father got the laughs along with the salesman at the festival and the pickpocket who later becomes something of a “good guy” in this tale.
<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXni6O-tw6-Ist4NPUfDVyhbd4Nrp3kQAvHtGz4Hgzz4a7PhXxPrMyplJ472d89n8etqX7XCUB3gtBB3fxCKxQgLHK-IJcx3D552Hh4r1ke3ej7xjAAdlAtk5tFkxhNya4_U51FE2cohrRKctpipV_Poc5wrw6kAGIorpLsp7UBX7gbiYMduEGul0F/s4352/Sheperd%27s%20Son.JPG" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" height="320" data-original-height="4352" data-original-width="3264" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXni6O-tw6-Ist4NPUfDVyhbd4Nrp3kQAvHtGz4Hgzz4a7PhXxPrMyplJ472d89n8etqX7XCUB3gtBB3fxCKxQgLHK-IJcx3D552Hh4r1ke3ej7xjAAdlAtk5tFkxhNya4_U51FE2cohrRKctpipV_Poc5wrw6kAGIorpLsp7UBX7gbiYMduEGul0F/s320/Sheperd%27s%20Son.JPG"/></a></div><i>Matthew Krob. Photo by Jonathan Slaff</i><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6-2LTKa0A8sAJul5sOsUIXI5AKqpCft7vpl08dZncFj5PelCWfK8rAEisnaI7z_vU0YeNkSDQjQzSdYhekIxsECvBVqvYjXRVu1BnhNO_O9yvfyaAYropjpQzB-mVwPcv5QJ5CwPE7IEJSRzjClZHkTttna_EMP0KAQ15xMJz-OzKxV1fU7ECEz3Q/s1500/Sheperd,%20Son%20and%20Baby.jpg" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; "><img alt="" border="0" width="320" data-original-height="1158" data-original-width="1500" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6-2LTKa0A8sAJul5sOsUIXI5AKqpCft7vpl08dZncFj5PelCWfK8rAEisnaI7z_vU0YeNkSDQjQzSdYhekIxsECvBVqvYjXRVu1BnhNO_O9yvfyaAYropjpQzB-mVwPcv5QJ5CwPE7IEJSRzjClZHkTttna_EMP0KAQ15xMJz-OzKxV1fU7ECEz3Q/s320/Sheperd,%20Son%20and%20Baby.jpg"/></a></div><i>David Marantz, Matthew Krob. Photo by Lee Wexler/Images for Innovation</i>
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Overall, definitely worth seeing even if you’re not a Shakespeare scholar though you’re probably not going to sneak some of the dialogue or context past young kids. I instantly knew what the “hobby horse” line meant so I’m pretty sure most kids will as well or you’ll be the parent being asked about it. I’d say this show is fine for your teens and maybe your tween as long as you’re the sort of parent who’s okay with questions and explaining complicated adult stuff to your kids.
Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-72047398380964616542022-06-19T00:00:00.002-07:002022-06-19T00:00:38.693-07:00NYC Apartment Hunting -- Pandemic, My Butt!!!Even though crime is rising in NYC, that's apparently doing nothing for rental prices or getting into an apartment. Even trying to get a roommate is a bitch in this place. I'm beyond frustrated and definitely don't remember it being this f-ing difficult even at the peak of my hard scrabble post-divorce life when I'd just gotten out of the transient life. When I was looking in 2015, it was at another point where the rental market was said to be impossible and I was in an emergency situation where I had to get the F out ASAP since my roommate was literally trying to interfere in my relationship with my then boyfriend Mr. Orgy. At this point, it's time for an upgrade and I'm fed up with one of my landlady's sons who has no respect for personal property, personal space, neglected a cat who recently died as part of it, doesn't pay a dime in rent + has a girlfriend who's been in my face over things she's got no business bothering me about or trying to make rules on. Nobody would pay any form of rent to live in these conditions and I offered to pay more rent to get the second room and them leaving but my landlady would rather accommodate these leeches than a quiet, long time tenant who even paid her rent when she wasn't in the state for most of 2020. I don't have to enable these assholes and plan to pay only for utilities and a reduced rent reflecting the loss of my quiet enjoyment of my space.
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By law, I have to get a 90 day notice before I can be evicted and I'm pretty sure a court would consider the fact that I have to lock my door when these leeches get into fights and the damage to property that would lead a rational person to fear for their personal safety among the various issues that are intolerable such as eating food I paid for (which made it necesary for me to get a lockbox for the fridge in the kitchen), crowding me out of spaces that were part of my lease when I moved in, etc. My landlady's other son told me he was also looking to move because of these leeches and every single person who's aware of this situation has said it's time to move, I don't need to be there, etc.
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Now, you may be asking "But WHY is it so hard to find an apartment in NYC? Aren't you having massive crime waves and lots of lefist lunacy that's led hard working people with common sense to flee to FL? Didn't a lot of people find their distant digs much better than NYC and refuse to return? And what about how dangerous the subway is and how people are getting shoved onto tracks, murdered by homeless people who are mentally ill and criminals are literally running the streets? Shouldn't there be tons of vacanies and much cheaper rent?"
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If reality existed here, I'd say you're absolutely right but here are the problems with finding apartments in NYC:
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1) Finding a place legitimately being rented out by an owner is like finding a pearl in a bed of oysters. It seems like it was more common when I first moved here in 2007 but now you might as well try to fly from the top of one of NYC's infamous high buildings. You'd probably be more successful at taking flight by flapping your arms and not just plummeting to your death than you would be finding a legit listing where you deal directly with the owner of a place.
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2) Everything is listed by brokers. Brokers by and large are all about the money and treat potential tenants as numbers. Some seem okay and some might be honest but most are all about the Benjamins vs. actually getting you a good fit into an apartment. I go to viewings and see places but if you want to apply, some won't tell you how many people are in front of you, will keep showing places even when there are multiple applicants in the pool or won't even bother to contact you and then you get notification that the place you asked about is already off the market.
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Do you hear from the broker again on other listings they have??? Hell no! Some will tell you they'll contact you but in my experience, that's been a lie. If you don't have a close friend who does this or find a renter's broker (which may not even exist), you get zero respect or consideration even if you actually need out of a situation.
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3. Application fees: almost every place has these. By law in NYC, you can't charge more than $20 for this (credit, criminal, background checks) and if you have a report from the last 30 days they can't charge you an application fee. I have such a report after getting rejected from a place (more on that later) but haven't had the opportunity to try this part out. I have, however encountered ads and brokers trying to charge well above this. Just this evening, I see an ad on SpareRoom for a ROOM charging a $40 application fee (supposedly "after the initial application" like somehow that's a legal loophole permitting it).
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If you start seeing places and want a chance in hell of being considered against throngs of others, you have to pay a fee for each one. Imagine how quickly this fee adds up. Did I mention that this fee isn't refundable if you get rejected? You still need money for deposits, broker fees and moving expenses since you most likely don't have a truck or a van and you aren't He-Man so you're going to need help moving your stuff. When you're over 35, your friends and parents (if you even have fit men with muscles or women with lifting power) aren't going to haul all your belongings from one place to the next, often involving walking up flights of stairs. Some places I've seen have 5th and 6th floor walkups with no elevator in the building. I'm in a 4th floor walkup and that's my absolute limit; before I moved here, I never lived above the third floor anywhere.
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I've even seen roommate listings demanding application fees. <b>FREAKING ROOMMATE situations</b>. You know, where you're not getting your own space and have to share kitchens, bathrooms and occcasional living rooms and ask permission to do things you'd be able to do easily at your own house? I've encountered some of these where roommates had open "you can't have anyone over" rules and some don't allow pets (though that's a bit more understandable if your rent is much cheaper than it would be to rent your own apartment in the area). As I explained to people like that, I could live with my mother for free and deal with that. I could also live with some guy for free and deal with that condition (and did when I had to though I didn't make that rule); at least I'd also have regular sex in that situation so I wouldn't become a pain in the ass to everyone I encountered in society.
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4. Scammers abound thinking you are supposed to hand over thousands of dollars before even seeing a place or worse, to apply for a place. Never, ever pay money without seeing a place first and don't give more than $20 to anyone to apply for a place. Also, demand a broker show you their license since they are required to carry this on them at ALL times (this was told to me by a long time broker and she did show me her information). Some scammers are even pretending they are brokers and brokers have even lied about being brokers to see a place (this happened to an owner whose place I checked out but got rejected for).
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5. Delusional management companies: one apparently demanded applicants to pay a full months rent via certified check just to apply to a place according to a broker I met at one property during my lunch hour (and ended up late back to work because of this on a hot day so no looking at apartments during my lunch hour unless that place is walkable from my apartment). I adamantly refused and noted that I'm not stupid nor am I hearing the word "refundable" in this context.
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I also got rejected from an apartment where rent was far below the metric for affordability in NYC (your yearly salary > 40x the rent) because I didn't have a guarantor (or as I call it, a rich daddy since this means someone who makes more money and has better credit than you).
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Now keep in mind I have a very high credit score well over what it's recommended you have to get into a place and just got on full time in my current job where I'm being paid a lot more than I was in the past and finally in the atmosphere of what my skills are worth (which is also more than what a lot of people who aren't members of the 1%, STEM employees or work in finance are earning). I even got a peek at my own rental report and my score was over 800 out of 1,000 on my candidacy of rentability. Nobody should be asking me for a rich daddy to co-sign for me in this scenario, especially when I don't even have a father at this point. I definitely am pissed by this and still feel these are a bunch of idiot classist assholes.
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If I had a rich daddy, why would I be trying to rent a place for $1,800 a month uptown when I could just buy a place directly or live with the rich daddy? Like were you born stupid or did you work at it your whole life (to borrow a line from a song I heard in the John Waters movie "A Dirty Shame" that apparently was called "The Asshole Song")??
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6. The general attitude of management companies is akin to that of government employees: from what I've seen, you're not allowed to have objections to the price, apartment layout or any issues the company should account for. Nope, you should be thrilled to pay obscene rental prices to live across from the projects (or crime havens), have your closet for your clothes in the hallway, live in a 6th floor walkup with no elevator, have a micro kitchen, or deal with having no space whatsoever for your stuff. Having standards?!?!? How dare you!!!!!!! I've never seen anybody seem to take these realities into account when setting rent prices. Apparently landlords were desperate when NYC was burning and it was deserted but now?? They view it as business as usual and say "Fuck you for not settling. You'll take it and you'll happily accept my extortion." Well, not directly but they ought to; I'd probably have more respect for someone who openly said that vs. lying about it.
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I guess I've gotten older and more jaded about the idea of living in Manhattan but I've seen this attitude permeate in neighborhoods nobody would call toney or upscale. I've not even wasted my time looking in some areas since I'm not interested in wasting my entire paycheck on rent. I'm deliberately looking at places below the 40x metric and trying to avoid situations where I'm going to be slammmed with crazy rent increases like so many were post-pandemic after getting some good deal in 2020 or early 2021. I'm also avoiding areas I know are unsafe since I also consider that a dealbreaker unlike some of these delusional housing pushers.
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7. Moving companies are known for extortion and ripping people off in NYC. You have to really search to find a good one so that's a whole other ordeal. They always charge extra to move from or into walkups and I've definitely read some nigthmare stories. Oh, and they also charge extra if you're moving at the beginning of a month. I bet they also charge more for weekend moves yet some of us work and don't have PTO or want to take PTO for that. I don't even have as much but I know that's yet another expense I have to deal with.
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8. Finally, delusional roommate situations. Do you really expect grown people to never see their significant others? Or worse, that you get to live with <b>YOUR</b> signficant other but expect someone else to pay rent to NEVER have overnight guests (I have seen this in ads)? That's inequality and absurd right there. I refer to it as sex policing and demanding me to live in a convent.
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I think a "no guests longer than a week" policy solves the issue of unwanted live in SOs. Not dominating common spaces, not using other people's stuff or eating their food and not leaving your mess in places is fair but policing my body and what I do with it in my own space I pay rent for, demanding me to maintain Danny Tanner cleanliness standards and spend my weekends being Cinderella is not acceptable, especially at this stage of my life. To me, that's why I <b>DON'T</b> want to live with roommates. Somebody like that is too high maintenance and seems to be a wannabe church mom as well as no fun whatsoever.
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There's a fine line between having orgies and having dates or your significant other come over where you are respectful of space + volume. Why do I have to ask permission to have guys over in a space I pay for? I didn't deal with this shit in college and I adamantly will not pay rent to be living with some Mom wannnabe. I also don't police anyone else's love life. They can screw anybody's brains out they want in their own room as long as I'm not having to see it or be kept awake with it. You also can't get the sex smell that easily in a room; it takes real effort for that. It seems like women in particular are harpy bitches about someone having sex. I'm definitely not one of those. I did speak to one man who had that condition and I gave him this response exactly but most men I've encountered don't make a thing of it, I guess because they wouldn't want to live under those conditions themselves.
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Family and others have told me to focus on getting my own place vs. roommate situations. My sister even told me I didn't have a good track record with them and should be getting my own place. I feel like at this point, I should unless I found a really good situation with people who aren't fuckups or sex policers. It always seems like the normal people don't have space here. Who wants to bet the sex policers are also "woke" and claim to be tolerant? Yes, I think I've always been the type who wants to live alone and now I should actually do that since I am responsible, have a means to do that now and need minimal stress in my life.
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What's shocking is I'd expect sex policiers to be closer to my mom's age or from conservative religions but many of them are in their 20s and don't declare some fundamentalist religious affiliation. It seems we have Puritans dominating the new generation and finding people who aren't this way is a battle.
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I just want to find a place that meets my parameters (which are far from unreasonable even by NYC standards) and be left alone while I'm paying rent. I believe one pays rent to be left alone and you don't need to be up in a roommate's business when you don't know them. I've not been friends with roommates since I was in law school and never lived with a bestie.
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Friends familiar with the absurdity of renting here have sympathized, made neighborhood suggestions and said I needed my own place. They've also confirmed this process being nonsense and one pointed out that apparently I'm doing this in a crowded market and a busy season. But when hasn't housing demand been high and crowded here? Am I supposed to just rot in this situation, enabling these leeches or settle for garbage? I feel like if you don't keep standards for yourself, you'll just make yourself miserable and unhappy.
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I'd like to have some advocates who give a shit about ME and actually SHOW this vs. paying me lip service. I need a broker friend or someone who'll advocate for me with a decision maker on this front even though you'd think any sane buidling owner would want a tenant like me, particularly at this stage of my life. Why should I be forced to beg for an apartment when I have that score of over 800 out of 1,000? What gives here? I have long term tennancy situations where nobody would trash me as a renter. I've known landlords who had some nightmare stories about tenants and I have never done the things they told me about those tenants doing.
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Is it just a society that punishes people for being responsible, law abiding and not beingn trust fund brats? At least I can't be evicted for a while and nobody's going to sex police me here (I'd refuse to pay a dime past utilites in that scenario) but this is mental sanity stuff right here. I don't think my mental sanity needs to be tested after all the shit I've had to deal with already. Why hasn't the balance moved to people like Hunter Biden or DeBlasio or other truly despicable types? Just saying. At least I'm more than happy and capable of knocking people down from their self-created pedestals and don't worship anyone.
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For those in NYC, I leave you with this question: Do you think it's harder to get housing or get a man you have a future with in NYC? It feels like both are impossible at this point.Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-4612768752097215162022-01-28T23:03:00.003-08:002022-01-28T23:03:55.386-08:00Some Leaders and Change Makers Aren't Chosen but SummonedIf you are a person governed by personal integrity and the type who feels you should BE the change instead of complaining about why things don't change, then you can definitely relate to this sentiment. As I'm going through my life I definitely have found that to be more and more true.
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Sometimes, the choice to speak out or do something is not even really a choice. You're minding your own business, content to go about life and do you thing when all of a sudden there's bullshit confronting you. Maybe it's a rude salesperson. Maybe it's a boss being emotionally abusive. Maybe it's some rando who nearly killed you in traffic. Maybe you're getting slammed by bureaucracy because you don't come from money but people assume you do. Either way, you've been thrust into some time of intolerable conflict where your choices are "sit back and take it" or "give 'em hell." Not sure how common it is or how many people identify as this but I like to think that many people in America are of the "give 'em hell" mindset. We claim to revere and respect the "give 'em hell" types. In fact, I think it's an unofficial requirement that you be a "give 'em hell" type if you're going to be a lawyer.
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But have you ever noticed that whistleblowers are never protected by society's decisionmakers or many of the "woke" activists? Where's the fund for them? Don't tell me "just create a GoFundMe or a GiveSendGo campaign." Not everybody's story goes viral or has that kind of support from the world at large. Where's any concern for one's survival in the meantime from any camp? Don't you get that lots of people get blacklisted by employers if they speak up against anyone, even the Harvey Weinstein figures? Where are the employers who fight this bullshit? Why don't any say "I'd be proud to hire that person since they have principles?" Do entire industries just cover for assholes, in contradiction of their supposed claims to value all people or care about the populace at large? I suppose stuff like this makes me look skeptically at the whiners who bitch at people for protecting their own self-interest. Will those woke scolds feed the children of the "good" cops who speak out against corruption? Will they be supporting the fired creatives who report some well known sexual predator? It doesn't look like they do.
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In the legal world, lawyers are requried to report ethics violations and can't be blind soldiers just following orders at their jobs. There's a specific rule that says this. But what do legal employers do when someone makes a report against some other employer who's straight up got no business trying to solicit clients or supervising anyone? What if it's an employer who's a sexual predator or hits people in the workplace? I've been given the impression that legal employers have no respect for whistleblowing and outright discourage it by punishing the people who do it with blacklisting in spite of the reality that attorneys are commanded to report ethical violations in their profession. Who thinks the people who'd blacklist some whistleblower is guilty of things that they deserve exposure for or are feckless wimps who'd never report anything since it would be harmful to their personal comfort in some way?
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If you're acting against your personal comfort, clearly you're governed by something else & have far more integrity than losers who will blacklist others for taking a stand. I feel like those people would just let some rapist continue harming people, a child molester continue harming kids, a wife beater keep beating his wife, thieves continue to steal, you get the idea. To me, staying silent when shit happens in front of your face is enabling that bad behavior and you might as well be participating in it yourself. Those who are "give 'em hell" types find this intolerable. Their feeling is "I have to do what's right" and it doesn't matter what personal comfort is lost or how much money you pay them to drop a claim or what threats you make to them. It's just "this is what I must do." It's a moral imperative, God's will, however you interpret it.
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In my own speaking out and stepping up experiences, I was thrust into some intolerable situation that was unfair to me in some way. Whether it was threat to my academic record, being denied a job I was perfectly capable of doing, an abusive work environment, witnessing racism being practiced on my friends, or seeing loved ones being treated terribly in a job, I didn't choose to inject myself into situations. I was facing negative impact or the threat of negative impact and simply decided it was time to fight against it. In the case of friends being subjected to racism, that was something I was asked to watch then be involved in but I didn't like seeing my friends being treated badly as that affected my life (when you care about your friends, you don't want people abusing them and making them unhappy). This is something I did as early as middle school. It's funny that people actually had positive words for me after I took action even though I was far from Ms. Popular. I've also never regreted taking these actions and I guess this is how I became a lawyer though I'm not a litigator.
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When you've been called to take action, you get it. I also keep seeing anti-mandate protesters taking action and I'm like "they're doing the Lord's work." So is the widow of that officer who just got killed. I love that she called out the feckless Bragg in her eulogy, this creampuff DA who thinks criminals should get to freely roam the streets and harm others. I bet he'd feel differently if HIS loved one or HE were a victim of some of his beloved criminals. Same goes for all the politicans who enable that shit. It's time the criminals actually targeted those people. That's what I'd do if I were a criminal.
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I suppose, though, that's because I'm also rebellious and big on giving people some "fuck you" alongside something I'm doing. Why individual armed security people or staff members haven't poisoned these people or simply gotten out of the way when guns were aimed at these losers is a mystery to me. My personal integrity would command me to make these people suffer the consequenses of their stupidity. I can't be that rare a breed but perhaps I am. Someone who did that stuff would be a personal hero to me. I understand that officer's widow got a standing ovation when she called Bragg out and is sure to become a personal hero to many in NYC and beyond who are fed up with creampuff DAs and lying politicians.
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One thing for sure is that I have tons of real life influence for my creative pursuits. Apparently, we're getting a blizzard so I'll get to sit pretty at home.Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-90559351040165834662021-12-18T18:00:00.001-08:002021-12-18T18:00:19.243-08:00Long Overdue Life UpdatesA lot has happened since my last post.
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I got to go on my first ever trip outside the United States. That was huge, lots of fun and something I definitely want to do again but want to be more proficient in the language first; I went to Paris so got my first passport stamp in my passport. I got that lifetime subscription to Babble so I could try learning some of the languages they have on there. Sadly, I haven't tried doing that yet but it's on my list of things to do. So is more travel and I do have friends who live in different places I could visit and some who've traveled around the world I can consult with on travel tips.
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I also got a new job in an area of law that I learned you could do elsewhere so long as you have a state license SOMEWHERE. So if I ended up leaving NYC, it looks like I could work in a firm that does immigration law as long as I kept at least one of my law licenses. You have to remember that I don't support illegal immigration but if someone's already here and is trying to become legal, that's an impluse I think should be encouraged. If someone's trying to do right and asks for your help, I think you should try to help them in that goal so long as you're not breaking the law or legal ethics rules. However, that's a job I don't feel will last long term. Not because of the work itself, my immediate boss or the support staff (I have no technical colleagues since it's a very small office) but because of the owner. I don't play disrespect towards me, period. If I didn't tolerate something as a 15/16 year old working at JcPenney, I'm not about to stand for it with 2 law licenses and a JD behind me. That's a simple fact. The upside is learning a new area of law and that there is room for creativity and personality in a law firm litigation job. I didn't believe there was any. I still want to make a living in entertainment law or doing in-house work but since I'm learning the paperwork part of litigation, I could end up having more options than I did in the past.
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Then, my boyfriend decided to break up with me but it's just like a Woody Allen movie at this point without any teenagers or near teenagers involved in romantic entanglements. I'd never take up with someone that young since I have a nephew who just turned 18. I've always had a minimum of "the legal drinking age" post-divorce (in the US, 21) but since my last birthday, I feel like it's pathetic to pursue 20 something guys. I also don't want to be some sugar mommy or feel like someone's mom. Probably too many generational differences. Plus the guy I was dating is much closer to my age and generation. That breakup has just been puzzling and confusing but I've been pondering things. I've had more time for "me" things (like finding a yoga studio much closer to my apartment than the one I used to go to that closed in the pandemic), though freakouts over the latest variant might fuck me up (my spheres tend to get way more paranoid and dramatic about it than his do). He's been at my apartment more since dumping me right before Thanksgiving than he'd been in 7 months of dating.
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It's not been a normal breakup since in a normal breakup, I cut off the guy completely. He's literally X-ed out. An ex can't get into my life again without making effort past me blocking any point of communication he'd previously used. I don't pick up calls from unknown numbers, won't deal with anything with that guy's name, deal with any of his buddies, that sort of thing. I saw these hearts in a booth at Grand Central years back that I still wish I'd at least seen what they cost apiece since if you fashioned one with a layer of thick ice, concrete and barbed wire (not necessarily in that order) you'd have a visual of how guarded I keep my heart. If you'd dealt with lots of people letting you down over the course of decades and had the upbringing I had, you'd also be guarded.
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This guy still wants to be in my life and talk to me. He claims that he didn't break up because he lost romantic interest or hated my cooking; part of me still wonders if I'm going to have to see him with some other girl all over him like we were in our dating life. That would be a definite "leave me alone & you might not ever be around me again" thing. I also never stay friends with exes or deal with them. I didn't do that with my ex-husband. 7 years later, I don't see myself ever doing that if I saw him. He did major shit to hurt me; I'm not sure if anyone else could inflict as much psychic damage as he did. I like to pretend exes don't exist. Sorry, I'm not that mature or evolved.
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The main reason I've let this guy hang around is because it wasn't an angry breakup like every single other breakup I've ever had. He didn't lie to me about some fundamental aspect of the relationship, he didn't just wake up and tell me he was no longer interested and he was being nice. I've had to take care of myself in life, especially after I lost some contact and support in my life. It's like "fuck you, I'll still get shit done even though you just made things harder." He's also still talked to me on his own volition after the business of retriveving my stuff from his place was done. It's more akin to my marriage than all my other relationships were. I'd told him I won't bother with some guy who's thinking "I broke up with her right before Thanksgiving and she still wants to talk to me. Look how pathetic she is." There's also been a lot more closeness in many ways than he told me he had with other friends and he told me this isn't how his other breakups ended so I don't feel like "this is just some routine he gives to everyone." Apparently him giving me a key so early also wasn't something he did with all the girls so knowing that makes me feel like I matter, that I'm special to him. He mostly said he wants to stay around because he likes me as a person, feels I have potential but will never reach it if I'm not around generous people (of which he's one). Friends have said he's the only guy I've ever dated who wasn't a loser or an asshole. That feels like a very sad commentary on my life; what's even worse is this guy has treated me better in a lot of ways than my ex-husband, the man who married me and took vows with me, ever did.
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But I guess you could look at that and say "yes, the breakup was sad but it means the commentary can change." He assures me there are other guys like him in the world with regard to personality. I'm definitely skeptical of such guys existing in NYC though you can find conservatives and guys who don't want to be players in their 50s and 60s+. My question is do any of them have a comparable education and life perspective to me or are they the type to say to me "you use big words" (I've literally had guys in NC say that to me).
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In recent weeks I've definitely seen things I can point to and tell this guy "here's how you aren't perfect." He told me a rather illuminating story that made me even more empathetic to his ex than I already was (since I know what it's like to be ambushed and have the man you love leave you). I heard this, thought "I 100% get why she feels as she does" and told him if he'd done that to me I'd have said "I hope that chick has space because you're not staying in my home." I'd have been civil for kids but civility would have been all my ex would have gotten from me; I'd never take him back and sure wouldn't approach him even if I felt my absolute lowest or loneliest. I'd simply get a sex doll and make sure I had a cat for cuddling and affection needs; cats are good for that, at least ones I've been around. Most cats like me.
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Cats are also easier since they are very transparent about where you stand with them. They don't pretend to like you and aren't nearly as needy as dogs apparently are. If a cat wants to sit in your lap or get head scratches and you're not the one who feeds him/her, that's genuine fondness. Plus they kill mice and bugs. I can't hate a species that does that and just looks darn cute. I actually missed the ones I had when I was married more than my ex-husband. My roommate's cat has also been very comforting but unfortunately, he's not mine and isn't well cared for by his humans. I've vowed to get a brush for his fur so at least his tail and back will be smooth and fluffy again. He's the Harry of this place (reference to my mom's cat Harry who's a massive love bug but isn't the cat who's so good with vermin killing); if I knew he'd be around New Year's Eve he could be my furry New Year's date but no guarantee there.
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Not looking forward to New Year's. I can't stay in NC longer because of my job (though that means money) and I no longer have a boyfriend (the reason I wouldn't stay in NC longer pre-pandemic since court appearances almost never happened between Christmas and New Year's; at least the one year the guy I was seeing had moved away, I was moving into a new place and got to be in a fashion show on New Year's Eve). I don't even have a familiar I could hang out with though maybe I could hang out with a friend who says she'll be around. That's it's own drama, however. At least on Valentine's Day, I have a dedicated single person's ritual. Not a clue what I could do for New Year's that's not spending a crap ton of money on a party. I don't even have some new experience I could do like going to the Times Square ball drop.
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One good thing I've noticed is that talking to that friend has given me perspective on my own life troubles. My stuff is much easier than hers. Perspective on your own troubles is impotant; knowing others have survived worse or are going through worse takes you out of feeling sorry for yourself, which is important if you want to cultivate better in your life. Plenty of sources will verify this including guides on manifestation and creating abundance.Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-14319060407611809442021-07-31T15:39:00.004-07:002021-07-31T15:43:56.157-07:00Social Media Background Checks -- What The F***?!?!?!?Yeah, life has been extremely busy lately. I recently got to have my first international travel experience (more on that in a separate post, maybe after I get some pictures off my phone) that I would never have been able to predict happening even a couple months back. I've also been trying to do mindset work since it seems my former manager and countless others who discuss mindset work may have a point though I'm probably going to remain some level of cynic until I'm dead. Trying to get rid of all my cynicsm might be akin to asking for miracles and no mere human can do that. The best I can do is "be more like my family members."
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My boyfriend, who I love if he loves me though he's not actually TOLD me "I love you" (so I'm playing my hand very close to my chest though if he didn't love me, I'd be curious to see how he treats a woman he DOES love; he's been better to me than any other guy I've dated), isn't a man without baggage. I had to warn him about not taking my ex's side in the divorce or trying to brand me as "lazy" when I simply happen to be selective when it comes to what I'm going to do for work. He also seems to ignore his own good fortune at having friends in high places to help him in the working world while I don't have that privilege nor do I have a STEM background or (what seems to be critical in my field) experience or interest in the paperwork part of litigation. Some people get that I work in a niche area, am not your typical attorney and appreciate those things about me while others insist that I conform to be just like every other boring person and that I apologize for not being from a T1 law school, working in a big law firm or wanting to do any of that stuff.
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Apparently one such form of shaming creatives/non-conformists comes in the form of "social media background checks." Per my boyfriend and online research he showed me, companies that can pay viable wages employ third party companies to monitor anything you write online then screen you out if you have any opinion whatsoever on a subject that doesn't march in lockstep with the rest of the social conformists or maybe the woke scolds depending on what industry you wish to work in. This post is specifically for you cretins along with those who employ you :)
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His stance was "accommmodate these jerks by stifling your creative voice." He's not the first person to say that & ironically I'm not sure any employer has even bothered talking to me long enough to go on such fishing expeditions (if you're an attorney, you definitely know about the use of this term from law school or trial practice work). You apparently have to give consent for this to happen and some companies do have a provision that says you will be permitted to get all the information from such reports. Such reports also omit information based on protected categories (which technically, stuff about your significant other would qualify since that would presume your sexual orientation and an employer can't discriminate based on that in many localities if not the entire US; I do know it's not allowed in NYC).
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Apparently these reports include political and religious rants, complaints about previous jobs or bosses (what if your boss was Harvey Weinstein and he'd touched you or made an indecent advance towards you?), participation in activities and so forth.
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Is anyone else hearing of this and thinking "this is ripe for abuse and discrimination against someone"? I definitely think it is and would say to some company who interviewed me, went through this process and then rejected me "why would I want to work for you when you are bigots/have no respect for creativity or one's creative voice/enable the Harvey Weinsteins of the world/act like you are Jesus Christ when I'm sure we'd find worse on you if we did a similar search?"
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I have maybe near certainty that employers in liberal regions or in the entertainment field would never have an issue with the ANTIFA protester or rioter who destroyed some small business or harassed someone on the street if it wasn't a minority owned business or a minority they'd harassed unless that person was wearing a MAGA hat or supported Trump in some form. Trump supporter seems to cancel out any form of minority status in Leftist Land. Just ask Candace Ownes, Larry Elder or countless black conservatives, independents and anyone else who's not a registered Democrat or speaks against those sacred cows.
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I would also question if this employer actually knows what attorneys do and anything about the attorney ethics rules? The attorney ethics rules expect an attorney to report slimeballs & speak out against them, not cover up for them or enable them to harm more people. Attorneys also aren't supposed to be bowing to government corruption or enabling criminality though plenty seem to be completely clueless about the text of the US Constitution, various laws and the state ethics rules for attorneys. I've had to block and wade through those idiots, whom I'd never hire as MY lawyer. You probably wouldn't want to either.
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The irony is I've had praise for my blog, my podcast episodes and so forth from industry contacts, propsective clients and even some attorneys. People will tell me "your blog is so funny" or "your comments on this topic resonated with me" or "I think you're exactly right on that point." <b>Those</b> are the people I want to work for, the people who think my storytelling, my humor, my entire essence are wonderful things that deserve to be valued and praised. People who think I shouldn't have to be a starving artist and cede my brain or be a stuffy old boring lawyer and cede my creativity. That's the audience I want. You notice no race, sexual orientation or any other form of identity politics is part of that equation? That's because I've gotten such praise from people of all stripes and in various corners.
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The question is why is it that I can't find anyone in that audience who has the ability to hire me for a stable job that would pay within market rates? How come <b>only</b> the boring, hating jerks are in leadership roles in the fields I rock at instead of people who aren't envying others, crushing them emotionally or asking them to dim their light? I have wondered for years why I'm not meeting the ones who value me, respect my time/humor/resourcefulness/creativity/basic essence and only meet the jerks. This feels like a mindset thing, hence my doing that sort of work so I can attract the group I want.
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But stuff like that social media background check requirement? That just sets me further back or makes me say "I don't want to work with you." I think many others are probably more equipped emotionally to tolerate or settle for bureaucratic nonsense that I just won't. Not having anyone to back you is a big, fat problem and I love that when I've brought up class factors and economics having to be resolved if you truly want "diversity and inclusion" or truly live by it, people have agreed with me.
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In all fairness, diversity of mind and perspective should also be included and not doing so screams "we were lying when we said we cared about diversity and inclusion." That ethic isn't just for minorities and if you want to get more of them in the doors, you have to address class factors, the impact of living in a bad neighborhood or a dysfunctional family where you had to do things on your own or didn't even have the resources to turn to if you wanted to get out of that environment. That stuff affects your psyche, your thought process and how you approach the world. Some people own it and know it's their issue but not everybody has that self-awareness and telling them "get over it" or "do this" isn't effective. You must show them <b>BY EXAMPLE</b> why their particular belief is wrong. Here are some Cracked articles for references: "<a href="https://www.cracked.com/blog/the-5-stupidest-habits-you-develop-growing-up-poor">The 5 Stupidest Habits You Develop Growing Up Poor</a>" & "<a href="https://www.cracked.com/blog/5-ways-middle-class-taught-to-despise-poor">5 Reasons Why the Middle Class Doesn't Understand Poverty</a>"
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I also took a quiz recently called "The 4 Tendencies" and guess which one I got? The Rebel!!! Not a big surprise considering I'm an attorney who's a natural redhead so contrariness is kind of how we roll. However, the thing to know about rebels is that issuing commands at them is how you get them NOT to do something. They view commands as "fuck you and the horse you rode in on, you authoritarian cretin." You have to use LOGIC and REASON with rebels. I have to decide to do something on <b>my</b> time and by <b>my</b> choice, not be bullied or forced into something. Trying that makes rebels resist all that much harder. You'd think the US government would get that and certainly some other governments in the Western world where certainly other rebellious types exist. But that's a whole other story.
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I view such checks as an authoritarian effort to bully me into conformity and kiss butt to someone who's most likely not worth my emotional investment or the disturbance to my mental peace, work-life balance and the like. I don't think mental peace or work-life balance is something that only the rich can aspire to or get to have. Shocking, right?? I believe everyone should have standards for themselves since nobody else is going to care about them or have to deal with the repercussions of violating them. You know, I may even end up saying that very loudly to someone at some point and they'll either think I'm exactly right or incredibily intelligent and after considering my points think I've got a valid point. If you're such a screener, yep I'm calling you out and you can tell that employer I said it since I probably will say that or ask probing questions to anyone saying it's part of their process.
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Now to await the presence of people who'll read this and say "right on!"Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-61728164121999596652021-05-04T06:33:00.000-07:002021-05-04T06:33:04.305-07:00And the Future Is...NYC for now. Happened to be awake before 8 am so since I'm up, why not update this blog???
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How did we get to NYC? Eh, a few things.
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For one thing, I met a new guy. I've not made a big production of it, partially because I'm more private in things, didn't want to jinx it and I've been doing my fair share of dating post Mr. Big Stuff. There's also the inherrent nature of dating in NYC (see <a href="http://www.theangryredheadedlawyer.com/2019/03/charlotte-york-get-heck-out-of-nyc.html">this post</a> for details). I still think that post is generally applicable though undoubtedly the pandemic has changed things in NYC.
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One big question that's lingered in my head is "Is NYC dead?" From my own travels and my own conversations with people, I'd say "there's still life here and even still some of that old school spirit." For those holding nasty notions about black people, I've seen black people have words with other black people who were panhandling or lowering the quality of life in NYC by harassing others. One of those incidents happened on a bus I was taking to go home. Doing bus travel (as I'm not feeling the subway right now, despite claims that it will go back to 24/7 service in a very short time and the city is re-opening in a very short time; I smell politics at work vs. "lowered virus threat"), it's been "Harlem: the same as it ever was." I've also not heard back on my community board application so I've got to at least see what happens there.
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FYI, getting onto community board in NYC doesn't even completely have to do with you the applicant. I learned this after going on a group interview (two words that made me shudder immediately but it turns out this was much better than expected since this wasn't the most extroverted person dominating the entire conversation as it was when I did a group interview for a job at Abercrombie back in my college days; demanding the introverts suddenly morph into extroverts isn't cool and I'm saying that as more of an ambivert vs. a stone cold introvert with no extrovert tendencies to speak of) and being told what the next steps are. Not sure if people will actually look at the demographics I fit but I had a good laugh there answering the one "how do I identify myself" question noting my whole natural redhead thing and having to completely be self-made. Regardless, I'll get to actually tell you how the application process works, what the selection criteria is and get to bitch about politics on a whole new level that someone who's never done it has no right to.
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I think there ought to be a rule in life that if you have never done the thing you're criticizing, such as worked as a police officer/been on a ride along/known any cops, you don't get to bitch about it. You don't get a mic but you get silenced and ridiculed for being an idiot trying to pose as an expert. That way, people who actually know what they're talking about will be the ones who get the mic and real change can happen. I always cheer on people speaking on topics they've lived or experienced since that actually means they're worth listening to on something. If people would only stick to topics they're actually educated on, the world would be a much better place along with them staying in their own lanes (I'm looking at you, vaccine).
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But the new guy....that's something that blows Mr. Big Stuff totally away. I actually haven't felt that way about someone since I was dating my ex-husband. 4 months later and in the wasteland of NYC, I'd never believe someone who wrote on my Hinge profile "I'm going to prove you wrong" when I claimed that a guy on my level in looks, intelligence and the like didn't exist actually <b>WOULD</b> prove me wrong. Never one to resist a challenge like that, I instantly responded to that guy. He promptly asked me out. I told myself I would be good and not do instant sex (something that's rather common if you live and date in a major city, to the chagrin of you church ladies); I also had to see the gyno on medical stuff the next day and told him this directly in order to avoid any misperceptions or confusion (I wasn't playing any games and also figured it would be awkward to be doing such things then going into the gyno's office where they have to mess with those areas). I went to the gyno and was then out of commission for a bit. This guy asked me out again very quickly: I told him certain things are out of commission. He says "It's just your pussy that's out of commission, not you. I want to see YOU, not just your pussy." I don't feel like a lot of guys who'd just met you in NYC would vocalize such a thing though maybe more would be thinking it than my inner cynic would believe. He saw my tiny room and we hung out here. I also introduced him to my roommate's cats including the one who is super sweet and affectionate. Long story with those cats but as we get to talking, I note that we have more stuff in common. I also learn that he's as good at managing around setbacks as I am. When certain things were finally back in commission, there was definitely a natural progression towards incorporating that element into the proceedings.
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At this stage in my life and certainly living in NYC, even in pandemic times, I figured finding a guy where that existed was about as likely as winning the lottery, getting struck by ligthning or maybe my family leaving NC and moving closer to where I live. I didn't even feel that whole thing with Mr. Big Stuff until later in the relationship and it was never on that same level of intensity. Going on dates post divorce, I didn't feel the same energy as I had with my ex and just thought "that's stuff for your teens and 20s and Single 1.0 life". If you've felt it, you know what I'm talking about. It's the difference between a mere surface "I like this person and having sex with them" and a feeling that just thinking of that person makes you all giggly, smiley and silly to where strangers wonder what the hell's wrong with you. It's wanting to be around that person a ton, even when you're sad and depressed and not feeling like dealing with the world. To you, that person isn't "the world" they're just "that person." You don't feel like you need pretension or to put on your face or be "the me I show the rest of society." It's something you feel organically, not something you can manufacture or push yourself into feeling no matter how much you want to feel that way. Ideally, as you're feeling it the other person is too. Otherwise you just feel naked in a metaphysical sense (God knows we've all felt that at one time or another; a classic example is unrequited crushes).
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On literal 4/20, I get asked about becoming exclusive. I accept so here we are. No regrets or itchiness to bail at the moment. He tells me he looks forward to becoming an old couple together. I'm like "okay." That prospect didn't scare me and I'm the woman who's had to deal with stalkers and clingy guys with no love for either. Coming from him, however, just felt natural and like it could be a possibility. It didn't feel like intrusion. I think when remarks like that don't feel like intrusion, that means you've got that heady rush and more than a mere fling or sex buddy scenario going on. It feels nice to finally have a local guy I want to spend time with. My sister, upon hearing about this boyfriend, claims I won't be going to NC this summer since now I have a boyfriend. I don't really know if that's true but it definitely makes me feel like my future could indeed be here vs. feeling like there's nothing left & where the heck am I going to possibly start over at.
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I also bit the bullet and hired a professional resume/cover letter writer to target entertainment law jobs specifically. As a likely result, I did score a couple good interviews (one job turned me down but the other I'm still waiting to hear about for a second interview; I need to follow up on that today). Such a job would change things dramatically if I can't get another stable, viable income stream from independent work and now that I have this boyfriend (the fabled guy my former therapist told me I <b>should</b> be going out with), I feel like "it's time to up your game; you can totally do this." If we're the sum of who we hang out with, then this guy blows everybody else away in that regard. As far as I'm concerned, if Mr. Big Stuff tried talking to me again I'd throw that in his face and inform him that he's got no chance. He should have thought about my value when I went to see him in December. His loss is my boyfriend's gain. Every single person I've talked to is Team New Boyfriend.
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One of these days, I'll get a nickname for him but it's something that's got to come to me. Those are something else you can't manufacture or invent since mine come from using it to sum up everything you need to know about the person without excessive detail. The best is when other people use my nicknames to describe the same person. What's even more interesting is I found out recently the emergency room in NC misdiagnosed my toe injury and it's actually broken but never healed (and that's why I can't bend the lower joint in my index toe). If my toe had been broken, I might never have gone to Indiana since scheduling it before going back to NYC and not missing holidays with family was hard enough beforehand. If I'd not gone to Indiana, I wouldn't have had my heart broken and learned Mr. Big Stuff was a dead end. If I'd thought there was still possibility with Mr. Big Stuff, I wouldn't have gotten dating profiles anywhere (including Hinge). If I'd never gotten a Hinge profile, I'd have never met my new boyfriend and if I'd never met my boyfriend then he wouldn't be in my life now, wouldn't be my boyfriend and I'd not be feeling that heady rush stuff. It definitely feels like something out of "Sliding Doors" (a movie you should see if you haven't). What's even cooler is that he's seen lots of movies and TV shows I reference. He even mentioned a show that I'd also seen and claimed he was the only one who'd seen it!!! You get to do a lot more shorthand when you're in one of those heady rush situations mainly because you discover that you're on the same mental plane. Dating my ex-husband consisted of a lot of that and we were definitely a couple who disgusted people with their PDA. I'm sure my boyfriend and I would also be that couple if more social settings were happening but perhaps people in NYC are more chill about such things & there are fewer people around here though things are perking up.
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Sleep may just about be hitting me so I might be doing more of it in a bit. Let's see.Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-84417718963370582432021-01-29T13:15:00.005-08:002021-01-29T13:15:38.470-08:00Just Waiting on What the Future HoldsMade it back to NYC, got a negative on that first COVID test now just awaiting results on the second one. I'll have to call that place tomorrow if they don't have my results today (though they told me 2 days and it's been 2 days since I went). Thought I'd go to CityMD again but when I got there before 11 am they were at capacity for the day (they opened at 9 am). I was like "if I have to get up to be here at 9, I'm probably going to be very pissy being up that early". Not a lie; if I have no real reason to be awake early I like to avoid doing it. Wouldn't we all??<br />
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I've been on those upscale dating apps and some other ones for a bit and getting back to NYC, I discovered far more hotties in the area, got more likes and an interesting new contact who wants to discuss me assisting on a non-profit he wants to set up. Got rid of my pic with me and Mr. Big Stuff on my vision board & know what I need to replace it with (a pic of my youngest niece for one since she actually hugged me on her own volition while I was down there though I'm not going to have the bond of Mama or Gaghee, which is literally how my mom spells the name my oldest nephew dubbed her as a "grandma" term).<br />
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After finding out that your address information and other details of your community board application don't become shown to the world, I opted to apply for community board in my area. If I got that, I'd have to stay in this area. Whether they accept me or not, I have no idea since I don't have direct involvement in THIS community but have lived in NYC for a very long time, did speak at a community board meeting in my old neighborhood in the marriage days & am probably responsible for a small segment of Queens subsequently getting FiOS after years of promises that up to that point hadn't materialized into FiOS service. Also, if you really want to affect change in government you go do stuf like this. Go to the community board meetings, speak to people, apply for it when the applications open up, call up your local reps and state your views, run for government roles & so forth. You <b>don't</b> burn down buildings, loot neighborhood businesses and put your neighbors out of work. You also don't turn your community into a shithole if you want anybody to give a damn about it. I was doing this sort of thing long before the rise of SJWs so I look at their tactics and say "they've perverted legitimate protest and legitimate issues." Decades of psychological study also defy the leftist manifesto and general tactics. This is also why I'm going to keep laughing when people with zero knowledge of what they speak talk about politics and civic matters.<br />
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When you've run for office, lobbyed or even spoken with anyone from your local rep's office <b>THEN</b> I'll listen when you speak on such topics. Otherwise, stick to acting, modeling, producing or whatever it is you do & actually know something about.<br />
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As far as politics, I'm like "dazzle me, bitches!!" Talk is cheap, action is everything. We'll see what happens. I like to think many other people have a similar take and are watching to see what Biden does here. Will he call out the leftists? Reign in BigTech? Get that stimulus out as promised? Will Cuomo revitalize NYC (he claims we need to reopen but what's he going to do about the rampant crime that's caused a literal "Escape from NYC")? Will he remove DeBlasio, who might be hated by just about everyone in NYC and a lot of people outside of NYC?<br />
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Hatred of DeBlasio and his race pandering wife (yes, you can be a minority & a race panderer just as you can be any color of the rainbow & be a shitty person) might be another point of common ground along with love of Betty White. I've never seen anyone say "I hate Betty White."<br />
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Just noticed "Youth of a Nation" by POD playing on my iTunes list. That seems fitting for the moment we're in, huh?<br />
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Realized that I don't think NC is going to be my future. For one thing, it's probably not very good for dating to find the predominant accent of an area to be one of your turnoffs. It probably also isn't good to be in a place where you need to have a car to get around & not have one of your own. Then there's not having many people involved in your niche in the area, being constrained by too many past connections you'd like to get away from & not wanting your life to feel like "Our Town" or some very boring soap opera. It's also hard to find guys down there who are childfree & won't want you to pop out their babies or adopt a mom role with their kids. I also don't want to be the only cool person in the room; there's got to be more people like you to hang around. But the question is, where do you go if NYC is dead?<br />
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I'm not sure if it is yet. I know what my personal tipping point will be but I'm sort of seeing where life will take me. Is it going to be here, some bigger city of North Carolina, northern Arkansas if I get into that incentive program, some other locale that is offered? My law license would like New York or Connecticut but I could do in-house counsel work most other places. I could even motion into the US Virgin Islands if I wanted to because of having a Connecticut law license, which I think is cool.<br />
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Then I also met this guy in NC and had a very weird experience since he never actually tried making a move on me, had invited me to stay in a room at his house aside from any romantic interest then he bails on taking me out for my birthday though I'd stayed over at his house and he never even sat next to me when I sat down at his home. I'm like "what the hell?!?!" That would never happen in NYC, even with the most gentleman of gentleman. I'm divorced, caught up on my missed years of adventure and while I'm not a whore, I'm also not a teenager. He was also a NC native while I've had better conversation with 2 other guys who moved there but aren't from there. One even wants to visit me up here and I said there'd be some video chatting before I even considered that. We didn't even go on a date while I was down there so I kind of insist on that. He told me he didn't have the Southern accent so that's points for me.<br />
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I'll still be writing this blog and trying to figure out if I can do more surreal adventures I can post but I definitely will be looking more towards my podcast so when I get that official link with the new name, I'll have to post that so you can hear it. Might have to start fielding off more crazies after that as well but fielding off crazies has been part of my life for a good while so that'd be a whole "what's new?" kind of thing.Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-35796173025300681562021-01-02T19:11:00.005-08:002021-01-29T11:52:22.517-08:00Looking Back on 2020 & Thinking About the FutureDoing this on someone else's laptop is a total pain. Hoping my own laptop will be back in commission sooner rather than later. I went to see Mr. Big Stuff in Indiana at HIS invitation back in December and discovered my screen was cracked when I got there. Perhaps that was a portend of the other events that happened in that time.<br />
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The day I arrived, things were good and he was well aware that I was staying for 2 weeks. The next day, he brings up three ways when I'd told him before I didn't want to feel like that was a condition to me being in his life, felt he was asking me to degrade myself for him & wouldn't be comfortable with that since I couldn't tell him I wouldn't rip some woman's hair out if I saw her with him in that way. As time goes on, he tells me he's stressed out with his Masters in AI program, has all these grand plans to travel, is eager to take the coronoavirus vaccine and that trip to FL we were supposed to take as a test of our future if the pandemic hadn't happened?? He was planning to invite "friends" he fucked and planned to fuck women in front of me like I was going to be cool with that.?<br />
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Yeah, I pointed out that he violated the basic rules of relationships and our 5 year history by lying to me about his "not being built for monogamy", growing up Mormon (he'd told me he was Catholic when we met and he claimed he converted in college when I met him & I pointed out that Catholics aren't on board with the sharing shit), his stance on me not sleeping with other guys when we were exclusive boyfriend/girlfriend, his claim to love me even as we were doing intimate things (I'd also told him not to even invite me to travel if he was going to introduce me to some local ho or be going out on dates while I was present) and generally deceiving me about his "lifestyle" knowing I was going through a painful divorce when we met + decided to return to my life in 2017 after I'd told him to fuck off, that he was dead to me and blocked him from everything. He even violated the rules of his own lifestyle since you're not supposed to force people to be okay with sharing and sister wife shit & you certainly aren't supposed to keep that from someone for 5 years, make special effort to follow and see them and act like somebody matters like he did to me.<br />
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Looking back maybe a week afterwards, I thought that maybe he'd been trolling me since he's got a history of doing that but realized that it doesn't matter since that's his loss, I could get a far better guy than him and immediately reactivated one dating app I was on as well as got accounts on a few other ones. I even got approved for 2 upscale dating apps (both of which are against sugar daddy seekers) and have had guys contact me on them. One reason for that is to prove to myself that he's indeed wrong when he claims that all guys who live in NYC and have Type A personalities are anti-monogamy and demand you to degrade yourself for them by sharing them with other bitches if you ever hope to have anything with them. I feel like that statement is wrong and not all guys with money are wannabe Caligulas.<br />
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Before I took that trip, I thought about the worst case scenario and decided I'd rather be free from any illusions of a future with that guy or feeling any love towards him & at a minimum, I could say I'd visited a state I'd not been to before. I actually told him I took back any claim to love him if he didn't love me. He claimed to "care a lot" about me but I find that illogical since he wanted me to do that sharing shit; he can hire a prostitute for that, not waste my time and expect me to become some bisexual ho to please him. I view asking someone to share when they're able and willing to satisfy you + you have no real commitment to them like marriage or kids to be the opposite of caring for them.<br />
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I realized that 1) I'm the one who left since he would have been a-okay with me going along and told me I didn't have to leave immediately when he claimed he didn't know I'd planned for 2 weeks (staying 1 week turned out to be a blessing since 2 weeks would have been unbearable), 2) I kept my dignity intact and that's a good thing & 3) that whole thing is over. When he moved away from NYC, he wasn't really an ex since we didn't have a formal breakup but this was a breakup and an end. There's closure.<br />
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He was also nicer to me about it than my ex-husband ever was. His last words to me were "best of luck to you" and he claimed he wouldn't be bashing me to his friends and contacts for being for monogamy and seeing jealousy as a part of human nature vs. a character flaw as he claimed it was. I told him he's also in the minority for wanting to do communal living, a life I'd never be suited for (facts: most communes failed and open relationships don't last long term). My last words were "ciao" since I didn't feel charitable enough to wish him well though I didn't feel like wishing him to Hell either.<br />
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I still hope karma gets him and he lives to regret what he did since I didn't make it easy for him in the least & won't since that's not the kind of woman I am. Had he done that before any emotional investment happened, say when he met me 5 years ago we could have walked away with no harm, no foul. Maybe then he could have been friends with me.<br />
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Friends and family have no love for him. I don't even have to wish bad on him since they're wishing more than enough bad on him for this & he claimed he wouldn't be doing that to me (it's not in his interest to try it anyway). His claim for apologizing to me in 2017 when he really had no reason for it was "I missed you." Well, this time I don't think he'd get a second chance since "fool me once, shame on you" but "fool me twice, shame on me." He claimed to have forgotten many things he'd said to me before and I don't want a guy with such a bad memory.<br />
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Not to mention he didn't get the symbolism of "I Can't Go for That (No Can Do" by Hall & Oates playing as he was driving me to the airport from his house. I also found the weather symbolic since it was raining and awful outside that morning but as we were on the interstate, the dark clouds were clearing away to make way for a bright sky. Actually, I took that as an omen and took pics of it to remind myself of things being dark now but that brighter days were ahead for me. I can't deal with a guy who doesn't get symbolism; that's as bad to me as a guy telling me I "use big words."<br />
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Mr. Big Stuff also has plenty of flaws and I remind myself of those in order to avoid them in the next guy. He may be cute but he's not the only good looking guy in this world and I went on those dating apps to remind myself of that fact. He's not even the only good looking guy who'd give me the time of day & his being gone so much makes things far more easier. I also am happy that I found out in this way rather than in FL where I might have been stuck surrounded by bitches and with no escape hatch to be found. That would have been even more traumatic for me. It also occurs to me that apparently he thinks he's Christian Grey without the BDSM stuff. Certainly his voice sounds like what you'd expect the devil at your shoulder to sound like though I won't deny that it's sexy.<br />
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So the knowledge that I did the right thing for myself is one positive from the pandemic. As my sister said, maybe the virus will make his dick fall off. I laughed at that and felt like that would be a true lesson; sterility wouldn't hurt either since he claimed to want kids but would never be selfless enough for them since he didn't even celebrate his own birthday, much less any holidays despite us spending a Thanksgiving together that he claimed he enjoyed. As I said, I want karma to fix him for that and it will eventually since we're all accountable for the harm we inflict on others.<br />
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Another positive of the pandemic is plexiglass shields in places, curbside pickups for things including clothing, not having to see people you don't even like (so great for those who didn't do extended family events or hated going to them in the first place), spending more time with nieces and nephews than I have for any part of their lives, resolving some conflicts from my past and perhaps the ultimate time to reevalute things (in my case, seeing my hometown from a new perspective and resolving some old conflicts with family). It's still not as hard for me emotionally as my divorce was, this breakup or the pandemic taking my main income source away. My mother assures me that I'll be fine since I'm "a Phoenix". Part of me is still like "how the hell DO you still maintain a sense of reality while keeping the positive vibes you need to have if you want to manifest the things you need/want to have a good existence?" Perhaps that's the struggle of all practical types who run their own businesses.<br />
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I also have to figure out how to create a business brand that's authentic to my personal and who I am since I'm not some boring ass lawyer & can't do that. That feels like something I need to have my own laptop for though it is something I fully intend to do. Revising my resumes today, even my per diem legal resume, made me feel more accomplished and like a boss babe than I was feeling. I've discovered in the dating world that income isn't nearly as relevant as what you're doing in your life & the struggles you overcame to get there. One guy today told me being the first person in my immediate family to go to college and the first in my entire family to go to any law school is an accomplishment that I should be proud of. I've been looking back at how I thought and my mindset in those days.<br />
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The main thing I remember is that I simply said I was going to do certain things. I was going to go to law school. I was going to live in NYC. I was going to get out of my hometown. There was never a thought of "what if you don't do that?" That just wasn't in my psyche. I don't even think "what if you don't find a better guy than Mr. Big Stuff" exists in my psyche since I just adamantly believe that such guys do exist. When or how I find them is a whole other story but I do believe they're out there. I didn't know exactly what law school I was going to attend but I did get to do it & here I am still licensed in that state.<br />
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Perhaps too many people have been trying to talk me out of my career stuff and there's just too much boring crap out there in my field for me to see a way to do my own methods. I probably need to pinpoint someone specialized in this world who gets that I am who I am and can offer a plan that works for ME, not any old entertainment attorney or even any old lawyer. That plan isn't something that's materialized in my brain like so many other plans did. Then I need to find the devotees who've got money for my services.<br />
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I have some fans, even some who liked my podcast I started doing and will continue to do. It's the same name as this blog and if you want to do listener support, be my guest but I'll not beg people for things or expect them to carry me. I'll change the name at some point but I need that to come to me as well.<br />
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One other big thing that surprised me this year was winning a Yelpie award that was based on a vote by the Yelp community. I've got a trophy and a gift basket of goodies waiting for me once I get back to NYC so that'll be fun; I also had no idea I was that popular or my reviews had such an impact on the community for me to get 2nd runner up in the Veteran Impact Award. I've also got a fashion shoot to do and a guy in Connecticut who wants to meet me in person so that makes me smile some. A dreaded milestone birthday is also on the horizon but I guess I can lay claim to not remotely looking that age, still attracting younger guys (though I decided I'm over guys under 30 since they're too unreliable and I'm not looking to be anybody's sugar mommy even if I had the means for it) and getting to spend it with family. I even lost weight since the pandemic weight gain though it remains to be seen if I can fit into my old bottoms again or not. My great black jeans fit me better now but perhaps I should have brought other bottoms to see how they do.<br />
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I'm also thinking I'll apply for community board since if I got that, I'd certainly have a reason to stay in NYC. I also may have the option of getting into Connecticut or even traveling with one of my buddies I've traveled with before (who reminded me that when things seem the worst with you, there's always somebody who's got more troubles to deal with & money can't shield you from life's troubles). With community board, at least there's learning how that process works and seeing that from firsthand knowledge. Plus if you actually want to do something productive to help your community and the world that's far more effective than torching public buildings, assaulting cops and vandalizing people's homes.<br />
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My life is still a big question mark and that's frustrating but everybody kind of has that going on at the moment. I'm also trying to remember that old lesson from 2014: life is the ocean. Life <b>IS</b> change.<br />
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Now I'm just seeing where my direction is going and I know of the things I want and things I won't tolerate at all. Who's wondering where the tipping point is for society, individuals and the like??Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-11249106894217298392020-10-29T18:30:00.003-07:002021-01-29T11:54:53.473-08:00Why Lawyers and BigTech Don't MixI'm sure we're all familiar with Facebook and Twitter engaging in leftist cheerleading and censorship of opposing views under the guise of "anti-harassment and bullying policies". Yet these are supposed to be platforms for ADULTS, right? Aren't children directly banned from them? And you're looking for civility on the INTERNET?!?!?! Like, what world did these people drop in from?<br />
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I actually got out of Facebook jail and for some reason, pedandic crybabies haven't tried getting me banned again but I haven't really done Twitter so much since it's not my medium. I'm a woman of words, not of cutesy brainlessness.<br />
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So I noticed LinkedIn, the vanilla version of everyone, started getting more political. Not sure why LinkedIn decided it wanted to be a Facebook clone by allowing photos, videos and other unrelated work stuff including political pages. The problem, however, is it decided to become China in regulations and endorse leftists. For simply making comments and pointing out lack of credibility in certain expressed opinions from users who either were fake, didn't even get a vote on the topic (think foreigners discussing American elections) or people who engaged in blatant hypocrisy, "Ross" claimed that apparently LinkedIn decided to ban me with zero warning, notice or specifics on exactly what words were considered "wrong" to them. LinkedIn is even more so supposed to be a platform for ADULTS and for that matter PROFESSIONALS. Presumably, professionals have actual jobs or businesses and aren't cheering on rioters, corruption and the like.<br />
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I thought about this e-mail I got from Ross after doing an appeal (I made it a policy to appeal anytime they tried censoring some comment I wrote though they never sent you a copy of the comment or spelled out WHY they were censoring your statements) & decided that LinkedIn is not essential to my life. I made some good contacts in my pandemic vacation and kept information from those people since they contacted me directly. I'll be informing more of them about the situation soon enough. I also know of other platforms that haven't been corrupted and signed up on those. I also thought to myself "I'll just do more blogging and podcast episodes so I can speak freely." I could even try that on my own website since it's got a blog feature as well. I know of others who've created accounts elsewhere, decided to say "fuck BigTech", that sort of thing. It's also been said that the more known you are, the less reachable you need to be. There are lots of celebrities who either got off social media or didn't opt to be on there in the first place. If it's good enough for them and many others who've decided not to stand for the Chinese law these platforms want to follow, why shouldn't I do the same?<br />
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For the numbskulls out there, lawyers are NOT supposed to be onboard with societal BS. It's the job of lawyers to point out oppression, rights being ignored, speak for the voiceless & call out the corruption where it exists regardless of what popular opinion dicates is good or bad. Lawyers are not supposed to be a wing of the censorship police or sit back while the brown shirts oppress others. If you follow history and the rise of communism, then you know that the lawyers were killed just as the intellectuals were since commies HATE independent thinkers. Law is all about critical thinking, especially law school. Oh, and we actually know what the laws say, what the Constitution means and so forth. Leftists in the legal profession are as ironic as rich people supporting communism. Stupid is probably also an accurate term since both will be targeted and offed in those same movements. It's like the ringleaders never read "Animal Farm" or actually studied the rise of communism. I've done both, even reading "Animal Farm" on my own while doing a document review assignment. The parallel to communism is obvious to anyone with basic reading comprehension. My liberal arts college required us to take a class called "Human Nature & the Social Order" where we defintely weren't taught about communism being a great thing. What I got from any class on the subject was "communism is a nice idea on paper but fails in the real world since you're never going to change human nature." Any real lawyer doesn't let anybody bully them into silence and trying to bully me is straight up laughable. I've survied things that most of these brats would have been destroyed by. I seriously wonder why any of these overgrown toddlers are getting media coverage and why these platforms should get to maintain Section 230 protection when they want to be editors instead of publishers. Many class actions are on the rise so the results will be quite interesting. I hope they get slammed as they deserve to be.<br />
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Now I'm just waiting to see how the election and so forth plays out. Made plans to see my sweetie for a couple weeks to determine if we've got a future together, hanging out with family, not trying to get overweight though apparently I "look healthier" now and am actually within a normal weight for my height. It took 6 years & a pandemic to get back to my pre-divorce weight. Also looking at the bright sides though my family never did big family holiday gatherings (my sister is probably thrilled about not having to deal with in-laws she's not keen on). I have a great Halloween costume that's even COVID friendly along with fun mask ideas if I ever have to design my own. I also am hoping I get my absentee ballot in time after thinking I wouldn't get to vote at all; as of today it STILL says "reviewing application" with a date of a few days ago. I asked them to send it straight to where I'm staying now and I have to get it postmarked by November 3rd. Hoping that goes off without a hitch but who knows. Otherwise, just more day to day stuff and hoping my income actually matches my training and background sooner rather than later. Now I'll have to do some quality niece time. Who wouldn't want to spend time with her? She's a little cutie.Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-433811307500562002020-09-17T12:11:00.002-07:002021-01-29T11:53:41.151-08:00NYC & Life in the Pandemic AgeGot back to NYC somewhat recently from NC and discovered that many of bottoms no longer fit. No more H&M size 2 skirts that fit the same. Most of my dress pants are now too small and even many dresses don't fit. I weight myself and now I'm 120. Granted, not fat ass territory and probably me at a normal weight (most people tend to say I'm TOO thin) but I can't help but feel like a fat ass. Yes, my diet is drastically different in NYC and there's far more walking to be had here; I even live in a 4th floor walkup and realized I could also just do stair running if I want to really get exercise. Everyone's like "you'll get to your same size again; just do some situps". I went to get a COVID test in my neighborhood then to a nearby grocery store and when I got back, I woke up the next day to leg pain. I thought "Get over it, legs. There'll be much more of that around here." I also realize a lot of people have gained weight; some even went through worse (like my landlady, who's still recovering from her hospitalization at the peak of COVID and is now trying to regain the ability to walk; she used to do a lot of the household stuff around here but now can't do such things).<br />
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Coming back here feels like starting a new school since so many things are different. None of my stuff was in the kitchen fridge and freezer. My stuff was still safe and I didn't have to walk into bug fest so that was a relief. When I first walked into this room with my new luggage, I thought "this room is much smaller than I remember it." After a few hours, I got over that space difference.<br />
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Yet as I've been traveling around here, it feels like there are still things that are the same. Broadway in my neighborhood is still the same. On my bus ride yesterday, the areas I passed through looked the same. The Upper East Side is reportedly still safe (a couple of friends live in that area). Not all the cute guys left NYC from my observation. I'm still not feeling the subway or being out after dark right now but at least I'm not hearing gun shots in this area or having to worry about being attacked on the streets in my neighborhood. I also get a lot more privacy here than I would in NC. Total lack of privacy there and everyone agrees that if my sister and her family had their own house, things would be a lot better for everyone concerned since there's a lack of space. It feels like that plan is getting farther and farther away for them. I was doing a lot of livestreaming but then my family leaders got bullied off the site, other family members joined new families and I'm not into paying money into this app to get means to give gifts to people who'll likely never gift me if I'm going live. I actually haven't gone live since I've gotten back to my apartment but may do my farewell address today. I also know I need to do some creative writing and more podcast episodes (and put a link to the podcast on my website!!).<br />
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Then I got put in Facebook jail about a month ago and am not feeling returning since Facebook wants to openly be a fascist network as of October 1st. To me, that's "why should I bother here?" It's like they know nothing about attorneys or what they actually DO in life. Catering to or endorsing societal BS isn't in the job description, nor would any sane person want it to be. I also know the fate of attorneys in commie regimes so attorneys supporting that look incredibly stupid to me. I also had a much better time not being on Facebook other than in Messenger or elsewhere and not really posting. Plus, I've been doing more networking on LinkedIn, using a legal posting service and trying to spend time with friends and family. Still getting my unemployment and just trying to hang in there, pray and so forth. With a viable paying income, I'm not sure exactly what I'd do or where I'd go but still trying to evaulate what I'm going to do (give up my room & move my stuff to some storage unit in NC, move someplace else in NY or CT, store my stuff in NY or CT and go back to NC). I'm honestly not sure but I know what I'll find intolerable and won't go giving my mother a heart attack. I think she and my family are probably happy I came to NC instead of remaining in NYC to possibly get sick. I understand that positive cases are about 1% here at the moment. I have no issues with mask wearing and was doing that before most people were.<br />
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I'm also wondering if I could get my clothes "unaltered" since most of my things had to be altered to fit my smaller size from before. Not sure about evening gowns and I know some of my formal dresses or cocktail dresses weren't altered before so I'm out of luck on those. However, clearing stuff out has actually given me more wardrobe space. I haven't decided how I feel about that yet. I also know there may be no need for me to wear dress pants or evening gowns in the near future. My mom told me not to get rid of clothes yet since I may lose that NC weight. The major factors behind that are much bigger meals, less healthy food in those meals and far less physical activity (though I tried to go to the store with family on weekends to get out of the house and get exposure to sunlight + make sure my immune system would be okay). I'm thinking I'll stay until maybe shortly before Halloween and I'm trying to figure out a costume where a face covering makes sense & that's not too scary for my niece and nephew. I have 2 major ideas and one might be more affordable though will come with something that may be hard to find storage space for later. Unless I have a physical reason to stay in NYC, I'll probably just stay in NC for Thanksgiving and Christmas. Maybe I'll even do my birthday though I couldn't tell you what I want or if I have any plans for going someplace. I haven't even though about Christmas or Thanksgiving.<br />
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I will be SOO pissed if my leather pants and my evening gowns will no longer fit or can be altered. At least those pants aren't the right style for a costume idea I have planned and if the previous tailor didn't remove material, most of those dresses could just be "unaltered" to the original sizes. Yes, we shouldn't get too attached to clothing but fortunately I didn't spend tons of money on most of my clothes and some of it is replaceable. I spoke with Mr. Big Stuff and others about the fact that my bottoms no longer fit yet my underwear still fits and asked him about a major relationship matter: would you drop someone over not looking exactly the same as they did when you married them? He said he's picky about such things, including for himself so I think his answer is "yes." I'm like "I'm not referring to being obese or overweight or being formerly active but now becoming a couch potato; I'm talking about the slowing of metabolism and aging." I'm not sure whether he realizes people usually get fatter when they age due to slowing metabolisms and that has me wary but I told him my concern is personality changes like becoming a substance abuser or get Alzheimer's; now I realize Alzheimer's isn't exactly something you can control nor is depression or mental health matters but those are personality changes and personality is a big part of someone's idenity and why you'd care about them in the first place. If he and other men get to be shallow over weight (a physical change), I certainly get to be shallow over substance abuse or mental health issues since those are mental changes. That kind of made me wonder "okay, how is the issue over weight different from the drug addict or the Alzheimer's patient?"<br />
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Perhaps one thing is weight alone doesn't necessarily hurt your partner though what if the person is obese to where they can't leave their house? Or where the other one has to be a caregiver? Or where the other one now has to adopt a different diet since the other one has to eat differently? I wouldn't like impositions on me, my body or my lifestyle. It's an interesting thought, right? Because of that, I'm like "not sure I can entirely dismiss him as shallow" but I did inform him that pregnancy messes up a woman's body, especially if she has multiple kids. This might become one of those "I'm older and wiser" sort of things. I also informed him about the sedentary lifestyle of the South (a woman who was riding an Amtrak I was taking to NC summed it up best: "all they do down there is eat & sleep") and said if he wanted to live there, he might want to take that into consideration (meaning he'd better find a good workout regime and ways to be active and monitor his own diet carefully since it'll be much harder to do that there than in a place like NYC). I'm still a stick person by Southern standards & always was according to anyone who knew me in those days.<br />
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NYC lends itself to far more physical activity and I feel like food here is much more rich so you don't need to eat as much of it in a sitting. You can also find cuisine for the health conscious more easily and some of it is actually pretty good since there are lots of people who've developed it and taken time to craft healthy + tasty recipies. I still have to figure out which Trader Joe's I'll go to and how I'll get some of the food. I wish I could have brought my butter chicken dinners with me but at least I got my orange juice and my veggies in my suitcase & used some of the chocolate in s'mores.<br />
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Still evaulating what I'm going to do. I feel like the medical checkup blitz & seeing friends will tell me more but I am definitely feeling some comforts of home.Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-25386463958396499992020-06-19T19:31:00.003-07:002020-06-19T19:31:37.756-07:00What a Difference a Few Months Make...So, shortly after I did my last post I quarantined myself in case I'd possibly gotten coronavirus from all my court travels (I had a cold on March 5th). The next week, when I was feeling better, is when NYC went to hell in a handbasket. It actually happened on a Friday the 13th, a day that's usually a very good one for me. Overall, MY day was okay then since I didn't have to go grocery shopping. Later, I learned that during the week of March 9th is when a lot of attorneys were exposed to coronavirus & quite a few caught it. I gave up court assignments, even cancelled a deposition I was supposed to go to the morning I woke up with that cold. Funny thing is that on March 12th in particular, the courtroom of a judge who later died from coronavirus was completely packed. An attorney in that court had complained of the crowding and the judge had told the attorney "if you don't like it, you can leave." Isn't that interesting?<br />
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I'm glad I got my last bit of normalcy in seeing my sweetie and going to my friend's birthday party before the month changed to March. He actually warned me that "things are going to get bad in NYC." After the next week started, I restocked food I ate while doing my self-quaratine. Looking back, I feel like maybe I saved myself from getting coronavirus by sitting that week out. Other than getting meats, I was able to get a lot of things I wanted and managed to figure out what I was going to cook during this quarantine. I even got prepared to pay my rent for the next month, thinking I was going to sit this thing out in NYC.<br />
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Then my sister called me on March 21st, begging me to get out of NYC and come to NC. I was resistant to this idea since I'm not at my best in NC + I have a bad history with my hometown but my family made valid arguments and things weighed in favor of me going: my mother and BIL both had/still have essential jobs (my mom has 2, in fact), the courts were closed by that point so I had nothing requiring me to stay in NYC, my mom said "we'll feed you" so I didn't have to worry about food or the food costs like I would in NYC, I could go to my youngest niece's first birthday party and see 3 other kids who usually only get to see me at Christmas and Thanksgiving and were excited for me to show up and they have air conditioning, internet, large kitty cats I could cuddle with and I wouldn't be scaring my mother by staying in a room in NYC. Plus, my sister was dealing with having to homeschool 2 kids and watch a baby. I felt like I would be more useful in NC than I would be in NYC. NC also wasn't the virus epicenter and I didn't want my mother to get a stroke or have a heart attack from having to worry about me. Social life also wasn't happening for me in either place and, as I continue to remind myself, NYC isn't NYC right now. I still talk to people who are up there who've told me I don't need to rush back or that I don't want to be there right now or that it's a good thing I got out. I also felt that being in a state that respects 2nd Amendment rights and having access to firearms would also be better than staying in NYC, the land of leftist loons who think crime will be solved with hugs and cookies. Most of the rich people even fled NYC and I heard it said that everybody who had the option to leave NYC left.<br />
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To me, choosing to go to NC was very different from the situation in 2014 since this isn't me being a failure but opting to help family & engaging in basic common sense. So I boarded a nearly empty Amtrak train on March 22nd before shelter in place took effect. I did some videos of that experience. Penn Station was a ghost town. I also opted to take a Lyft to the station, wore a mask and got in the back. By the grace of God, I made it to NC, isolated as best I could for 2 weeks and never got sick. So far, all I've had in all this is allergies.<br />
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NC is not a mask wearing culture and I have a sister who can't wear them, not even for 30 minutes. I also have noticed mask fatigue setting in around here. One friend recently told me that's also happening in Manhattan. A plus is that NC is in Phase 2 while NYC just got to Phase 1 and is apparently starting Phase 2 soon but I don't know when I'm actually going to need to be back in NYC. Protests around here have also been peaceful instead of looting and violence fests like in NYC and elsewhere.<br />
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FYI, I don't do the performative bullcrap and pap gestures that are in vogue at the moment. I've noticed "Black Lives Matter" never includes the lives of black conservatives or black law enforcement officers or black people who aren't seeking special rights or black people who don't cheerlead things like community destruction and violence (say black business owners who've had their businesses destroyed or black employees who've now been forced to apply for unemployment in the face of months of backlog to get money). I also think the people jumping on this bandwagon are full of it since they should have been doing things decades beforehand and we know damn well they'll never actually DO anything. If my former business partner becomes a household name in Hollywood, then I'll take Hollywood seriously when they claim to be giving opportunities to minorities. I also thought to myself when this first started it was a communist takeover attempt and now they seem to be going full fascist. Some predict that after the elections, this will be a mere memory. I say if you think Biden is the truth and the way, you've not been paying attention since Minneapolis is ruled by DEMOCRATS as are many of the major cities. The reality of their lack of care for minorities is staggering and obvious to anybody with functioning brain cells (that leadership is the one who failed George Floyd with letting that cop stay on the force despite numerous complaints against him). Look at rich white liberals trying to push for reverse racism and lecturing about "privilege" to poor people and those who've actually got minority friends and contacts while they pander to black people and think them incapable of advocating for themselves. <br />
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As a rule, I have to block anybody who uses the term "white privilege" since that evidences not only complete disrespect to me as a natural redhead (a group STILL being trashed in today's society with no ACLU to advocate for it; do you think "redheaded stepchild" is a compliment????) but disrespect of my lived childhood and experiences which most certainly don't qualify as having "privilege." People who grew up around my neighborhood ended up getting criminal records, became drug users and made all kinds of "bad" choices (most if not all of them were white; the black people I knew from school grew up to be functional members of society and parents taking proper care of their kids -- some even ended up in roles of responsibility including a classmate who's a city councilman in my hometown). Years ago, I learned from my own experience (and had it confirmed in a sociology class) that it's really rich vs. poor. Plus, you're an idiot if you think lectures or threats motivate people to change their hearts or minds. Only real life experiences people have with one another do that. You also can't force people to talk to those outside their bubble or be friends with people they don't want to be friends with. It also doesn't help if the only things people have heard about a group are negative and then a real live member of that group proceeds to live up to all the worst stereotypes about that group. My family's been having those contacts and friends forever (and most of ours were positive so we can separate crappy people from an entire race/ethnic group) so I'll thank some rich white liberal not to lecture me on things they know zero about. That's just as bad as non-lawyers trying to tell me how to practice law.<br />
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Everybody's been equal in trying to get PPP loans or unemployment benefits. I had to wait around for that for quite sometime myself in NY (one tip: contact your local reps if you hadn't; my state senator's office was very good in that regard and I made a new contact in a very nice woman who seemed quite dedicated to making sure I'd get my money -- she called me back from home so I can't speak highly enough of my local senator's office). One lawyer I work with said he'd not been able to get PPP funding in the first round since the money was gone so quickly so I'm hoping he got into the second round.<br />
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A few other things have been going on: I had to buy summer clothes since I had none with me (why would I when it was 35 degrees when I left NYC & I packed to "stay home" not to go out and impress anyone?). I got a broadcast hosting gig on an online app called Bigo (go check it out), started my own podcast which is for now the same title as this blog (4 episodes so far & plans for at least 1 more). I also got in contact with a legal recruiter and a career coach who are trying to help me get a job in an entertainment company without me having to lie about being a BigLaw devotee or a T1 law graduate. I also happen to refuse to be some leftist toadie when I've actually had the conversations and done things these Judy Come Latelys haven't bothered with and without having to make a conscious effort like they have to (I guess it's the reality of being part of a minority with no tribe to hang out with since you definitely weren't "one of us" with white people if you grew up with red hair in my hometown in the era when Ariel first came out; gee, I'm the only person who looks like me in the room almost all the time even in NYC -- let's also look at how redheads are still stigmatized and treated in many corners in modern times). To me, things aren't worth it when you have to pretend to hold stances you don't or cater to someone else's echo chamber as I never require friends or contacts to agree with me on every single topic known to man (I just insist on factual argument and no personal attacks or expecting me to do YOUR damn homework). I fought that battle when I first joined the legal profession and so many people told me to just be me instead of some frumpy lawyer stereotype. This is no different in my mind. <br />
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I just wonder how many people will step up for decency and not equating minority status with God status. If we're doing that, well I'm more qualified for God status than most people since real redheads are a 1-2% global minority. Nobody's going to deny a marriage to 2 black people or 2 Asian people because the staff thinks you're marrying your sibling and assumes you're committing incest. If I walked in with a guy whose hair was bright like mine, I'd absolutely get that hassle since everybody assumes natural redheads are related to each other. We had a neighbor growing up who was also a redhead and people thought he was our little brother. If I don't think I've got God status for being a natural redhead, then nobody else gets to claim that status. <br />
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Equality isn't about special rights or freedom from being wrong or freedom from criticism. Equality is about an equal playing field and equal access, not handouts as of right. I say if you want reparations, make George Soros pay them. That way, everybody wins. He's got more than enough, he'd no longer get to fund dissention if he paid them and it's the least he + his ilk could do. We need more Nipsey Hustles in the world (look up what he did for his community before being killed) and prosecution for false 911 calls for black people doing normal stuff like having cookouts or walking down the street not politicians taking knees instead of actually DOING their jobs to help ALL people in their districts (notice it's Democrats who've been peddling handouts for eons instead of self-sufficiency or enough for people to save up and improve themselves in this game we call life). <br />
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Yeah, I have lots of reasons I can't relate to SJW lefist snowflakes and don't respect them at all. This blog and I am not for those types. Before all this, I was thinking an exodus from NYC would be in my future. If I don't get a full time job there or work requiring me to be there it just might happen; I've got a 5 year plan. I'm not even sure NYC will be NYC again in the near future and I came to NYC for the old school, ambitious, working your way forward, people of all types coming together in common goals NYC not the whiny snowflake NYC that looks like Mad Max + cares more about statues than improving subway service or encouraging businesses to set up shop and hire locals. I'm glad I get to talk to my sweetie on occasion, that my gay bestie and another gay friend have gotten a federal court win in the change in discrimination laws and both friends and 3 guys have been awaiting my return to NYC (which I'm still not exactly sure when that will be; I'm just making the best of my situation in the meantime and declaring it an extended vacation away from sweaty subway platforms).<br />
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One goal I have before I leave is passing Zelda II on NES. I just got to the 4th castle (of 6) and know how to beat the enemy but it's a matter of proper execution. It's definitely not as good a game as the first Zelda but I've figured out tactics. I also reluctantly got some Apple AirPods (they were on sale) but they are useful while I'm down here dealing with family and trying to watch broadcasts on Bigo or play SongPop 2 while my phone is charging. I just tested them out with my iPod and they have a heck of a range with where your item they're connected to is vs. where you go. I was feeling blue earlier but this needed and long overdue post has done me some good. Trying not to feel like I'm horribly lazy when I don't get all the tasks done I set out to do in a day or sleep much later than I normally would if I were working. I wanted a break when I was working so it's like "here you go; now what are you going to do?" I'm also trying to prioritize family time and not being lost in devices.<br />
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My final words: stop reading mainstream media and get the heck off Facebook. Focus on your real life connections and family. Look at the advantages you've got in this time and use them.Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-1483424905392015622020-03-07T15:15:00.003-08:002020-08-07T12:01:07.869-07:00Uh-Oh, Love Comes to The Angry Redheaded Lawyer's WorldYes, I borrowed that from a Talking Heads song called "Uh-Oh, Love Comes to Town". I'm a Talking Heads fan and mastered that category in about 5 seconds in SongPop 2. I really don't care if you call it cliche since I'm a "smart" type and their music is billed as "for smart people."<br />
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I've had a lot going on and got news that obliterated any concern or regard for my nasty divorce. Over time, I was starting to feel romantic love towards Mr. Big Stuff. A lot of the tenor of things started to change & more recently he'd invited me to travel with him and visit him in other places. My thought was "I'd travel for a guy who loves me but I don't want to go someplace to find that guy going out on dates with other women or him introducing me to some local ho he's carrying on with like I'm going to share or something." He knows my history and my feelings about such things. I may have lived in NYC long enough to be a native New Yorker but there's still that whole Christian upbringing in my core so I don't do polyamory or sharing with others or playing second fiddle. I either have to be the bottom bitch or there has to be no rank. This guy is someone it's much easier to talk with on the phone than to text with. He might be one of the few Millenials I've met who is good with the in-person interactions and offline conversations.<br />
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I was thinking "I do NOT want to fall in love with that guy if he doesn't love me" so I felt I needed to know the answer to the $64,000 question: Do you love me?<br />
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The very idea of asking that question was nerve wracking to me. I probably realized I had those deeper feelings over a year ago but I didn't really want to own them until I knew where I stood with him. He's been doing a lot of travel and had to deal with the coronavirus craziness in China though he had no illness, had never been to Wuhan or the Hubei province. The guy had to do self-quarantine for a month in 2 separate countries (2 weeks in China and 2 weeks in the US). After that, he came to visit me. I told him we could go out as much as he wanted since I'd go nuts if I'd had to be confined for that long. Currently, I have to self-quarantine because I have at minimum a cold and want to make sure it's not actually the coronavirus (there are currently 11 cases here & the second confirmed case was a lawyer who works in Midtown East who went about his merry way while having milder symptoms then got hit with it; during that time, he hung out with somebody who works at Kings Civil Court, which had to be sanitized because of this--I've not been to Kings Civil in over a month but still, if you do appearances you're often going to many of the courthouses and who knows what appearance attorneys may have had contact with that employee who then went to other courts?). It's gotten to be a big issue in NYC, a land with lots of people who are on public transit and in a smaller space. This is not good for those living in NYC.<br />
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But finally, I had the opportunity to talk to my sweetheart and asked the question. He said "yes."<br />
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I was legitimately shocked but maybe I should have known. He made me ask about exclusivity after calling me his girlfriend without notice to me at this event we went to. He also told me he's not a guy who tells you how he's feeling in words but shows you in his actions. His actions have indicated love & sweetness for quite a while in the past few visits we've had and in our interactions (we talk to one another more than we had in the past after making up from a major fight). Friends of ours have heard about the other one. He told me friends of his know who I am and I mentioned that mine also know who he is.<br />
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I hadn't thought deeply about the future but I did come to the realization that I could leave NYC and live elsewhere with him if that was something he asked. I've had over 12 years here and would like my own space sometime. My law licenses are transferable to many places and a name kept popping up in my head: John Hughes.<br />
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John Hughes is the guy who did "Home Alone", "Sixteen Candles", "Pretty in Pink", "Curly Sue" and many other films. He had a Hollywood career but he didn't live in LA. He lived in Illinois in a suburb of Chicago even during his peak. He still maintained his career despite this and didn't succumb to the leftist nonsense or change who he was.<br />
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Considering we have the Internet and so forth today, there's no reason you couldn't still have an entertainment career and an oasis from leftist loons, high taxes and rent that's too damn high. So I felt like "if I get remote gigs and have things rolling in the entertainment world, there's no reason I couldn't move to someplace where I can motion in using my law licenses and still do what I'm doing now." I wouldn't feel like a failure if I didn't live in my hometown, where I have lots of emotional baggage. A new place that lacks such baggage and associations with my family could be doable. Greater distance from crazy relatives could even be advantageous for me and Mr. Big Stuff.<br />
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Being someone who vowed she'd die in NYC, this is a huge leap for me. It's me saying "that's something I'd do for love but love wouldn't be the sole reason by a long shot." The reality is I'm not going to live in a place where criminals have more rights than me (see the new bail reform laws) and I don't want to be stuck with no property to call my own in my 60s + have to have roommates. A cheaper cost of living and being able to get my own place would definitely be selling points for me. Places where the values of common sense, personal accountability and respect for laws/other people would also be good to consider. I need to travel more first but since I did traveling in November, I felt like "I could go elsewhere and feel some peace there."<br />
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In fact, I saw Mr. Big Stuff and went to my new friend's party last week and forgot all about the start of my transient life in 2014 until days later. This is progress. It also feels good having love with Mr. Big Stuff since he doesn't make me feel suffocated or trapped or like he's just paying me lip service. It's a lot easier since both of us have loved before and it's not like either person is unequal like it was with my ex-husband, who'd loved before me while he was my first true love.<br />
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Eventually Mr. Big Stuff & I will be traveling and we both acknowledged that it will be a test of our relationship. Will we pass it? That's a good question. I have no clue.Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-513121120945290062020-02-14T17:14:00.002-08:002020-02-14T17:14:39.472-08:00Making Peace With Valentine's Day and Other MusingsSo you may have noticed I've not done a ton of posts lately other than reviews. This time, it's not because of being repressed by the legal system and a jerky ex's legal counsel. This reason is much nicer: I've been out LIVING life. It's really hard to live life and write about it simultaneously. Writing requires reflection, which doesn't really happen when you're out living the experiences you need to reflect on. <br />
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I've been doing a lot. I got to go on a cross country road trip with a friend I made in my advanced hosting class. It was long past time for me to take hosting classes and you need a hosting reel to do hosting jobs, hence my taking 2 hosting classes. My advanced class was really tiny, a total of 4 people (including me). Nearly everybody I've met in the industry has said to me "you'd make a great host" and I've even done a paid hosting gig. I also did a hosting audition for a fashion event and was praised for my audition but didn't get to do it at the last second due to mysterious "change of plans" I wasn't told about until I showed up at the event. I also took a personality assessment recently for a job application and got ISTJ-A as my result (which is a "Logistician"); quite informative though I have done things spontaneously and will take calculated risks. Going on this road trip is one such example of me doing something spontaneous. I got invited with shorter notice and looking at my work schedule, decided "Yes, I'll go in the midst of November and forego assignments since I've never been further west than Texas. The pros of getting to know my classmate (one of those local female friends I'd wanted for years & hadn't had any luck getting until more recently), going to LA and passing through Phoenix so I could see my gay bestie and getting to broaden personal horizons) was worth my feeling antsy about getting back on time and concern about paying bills. The weird thing is it didn't knock my finances out of whack, not even a little bit. <br />
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This classmate is someone that if you looked at our lives, you'd notice major differences and major similarities all at once. She came from much more money than I did but also had an alcoholic parent, doesn't have extended family she's close with and has also been dealing with divorce. She also made her own way and definitely didn't get wads of money from her family. She's also got more access to legitimate contacts and knows where the cool kids hang out; life ended up making her fall behind in our class but she, like me, believes God puts people into your life for a reason & I feel like she might be a good counterbalance to my lawyer style rigidity. She said I'm probably good for her since I'm really assertive, organized and will do what I say I will. I have some empathy from my own divorce experience and I didn't feel she was making that offer to patronize or attach strings; in college, I learned that sometimes you should let people do nice things for you and we got to travel in a style I've never gotten to in my entire life and would only be able to dream of at present. I also never actually got a vacation after my ex threw me out and everything happened. She didn't make me feel like she was trying to be Superman or control my life. That never happens with people I don't know well (bear in mind this was our first out of town outing).<br />
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As I've said of long road trips, you'll either be bonded for life when you're done or you'll never want to see the other person ever again. Fortunately, we ended up bonded and I got invited to do international travel. She is more spontaneous, more outgoing, more experienced at travel and I think has less cynicism than I do; she wants to go back to the West Coast when her kids get to college. She'd probably call herself more of an archetypal California girl while I'm definitely an archetypal New Yorker (Southern roots notwithstanding). Kind of writes itself, doesn't it? I felt like I was Felix Unger or Larry Appleton for parts of that trip (the character who's more rigid, fearful of the unknown and so forth). Plus, she's got the looks and male attention + intelligence so there's none of that jealousy aimed at me. She also had the same complaint I have about the South and elucidated it even better than I did. I think of her like a cool sister or BFF who's more worldly in some ways but has never been patronizing about it since we're in agreement on a lot of things.<br />
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Mr. Big Stuff and I have also been talking way more often. He's coming to visit soon after he's got no more risk of icky corona virus germs (he's over a week into the mandatory self-quarantine though he never went to Wuhan or the Hubei Province). He also spoke of a possible future road trip and he knows I'd go on one with him. That'd be another test. He'd previously told me about where he's going to be spending a lot of time in the US and says to me "It'd be good for you to get out of NY for a while." <br />
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So that's led to a lot of questions on my part, as I'm sure most women would have: Do you love me? Where am I staying (I've usually hosted him when he visited here and he hosted me when he had a place to stay while doing a job here where he got accommodations at Columbia University)? Are you paying for me? Where do I stand with you? This is a guy I dated exclusively for a time when he lived here but life took him out of NYC and when he visits, I always see him since neither of us are exclusive with anyone else (when I thought he'd gotten an exclusive girlfriend without telling me, we got into a major fight where I told him to fuck off, he was dead to me and blocked him everywhere; he is the one who made the effort to contact me + apologized to me for that fight and saying we'd never been serious when we were together & this is a guy who never apologizes for things). We have discussed resuming our old exclusivity if we ended up living in the same area. He knows where the door is if he wants to take up with some other bitch & he is the one who chose to come back.<br />
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I straight up told him I'd travel to see a guy who loves me but I'm not going to pack things, pay money/lose money to then find him going out on dates or introducing me to some local ho like I'm supposed to be okay with that. Two can play that game & if he views me as "the NYC girl" it's wasting my time to invite me elsewhere if he doesn't feel anything real or sincere or has any future with me in mind. His actions have shown seriousness on his part, even more recently. I even said he acted like a guy who loved me and he didn't say "I don't love you." He didn't say "I love you" either, though. He knows I've got lots of blocks around that phrase in a romantic context & it would devastate me to say that to somebody first and not hear it back or even hear "I don't feel that way about you." In his case, I'd really feel robbed and deceived & he knows my history around it. Asking someone who's only loved one person in her entire life who then ended up betraying her in one of the worst ways to say "I love you" first is a huge ask. This is also a man who practically forced me to ask him about exclusivity after he called me his girlfriend (without advance notice) when we went to a formal event together. He told me we weren't exclusive because I'd never asked him so I decided I'd ask him, though I prefaced it with "you know I fear rejection but I'm going to ask you anyway." Something tells me he'll force me into any admissions of love. I never even said "I love you" first with my ex & I'm not a person who likes being vulnerable. I just feel like at this point, the evidence I've seen of his behavior towards me outweighs the risk of rejection. He has told me he wasn't just killing time with me until some mythical better girl shows up. He apparently also thought I'd go off and find some other guy then forget about him.<br />
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So this brings me to Valentine's Day, a day that lived in infamy for me for many years. Getting divorced years back also didn't make Valentine's Day a holiday with great associations for me. During that year, my then husband went off with his homie (a male coworker at his job who was a custodian, the job he held in the past & was also into the comics/sci-fi/gaming stuff that I wasn't) and said "I don't have a Valentine" while I was in the apartment. I stayed in, watched the movie I typically watch to commemorate it and ate alone. I've done this single person's ritual every year I was single and when I wasn't single or got invited on a date, I was out with a guy. Last year, I was on a date with a guy I met at a single's event I went to on my birthday proper. The year before, I got some boneless wings and fries at Wing Stop, had chocolate covered strawberries I'd ordered online and watched the movie I typically watch on Valentine's Day ("No One Would Tell" with Candace Cameron Bure & Fred Savage; look it up).<br />
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Today, I haven't felt a need to do a single person's ritual. My stomach feels crappy due to girl trouble but it's not that. It's not even the blistering cold outside. It just doesn't feel necessary for me to commemorate it at this point. Not sure why. Friends had talked to me about wanting to hang out but I feel cruddy so I'd just as soon stay inside and make myself something meaty (probably some turkey meat sliders since I need to eat something with meat in it) then take a shower and watch "Unsolved Mysteries." I heard a couple stories on there about people being murdered on Valentine's Day.<br />
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At least that hasn't happened, right? Maybe I just feel loved every other day of the year and have felt that more often in recent times so I don't see a need to "treat yo self" or make a big thing of it. Mr. Big Stuff doesn't acknowledge holidays or even his own birthday so he'd probably be happy to be with someone like me who doesn't have crazy Valentine's Day asks (if you take me to a nice dinner and get me something with good chocolate, I'm happy though I won't turn down roses or nice jewelry or stuffed animals and the like; plus I like getting laid so it's not like that's the only time a guy who was with me would get to do THAT). That's not most women considering Valentine's Day is usually designed to make them feel like shit if they're single. I really felt that in NC and dealing with my family but it's much easier in a major city, especially NYC since there are lots of single people here. You can go to singles parties, hang out with friends, be far away from the pressures and obligations Valentine's Day imposes on people. You won't be the only person in the office who didn't get roses or you could just order yourself roses and it's all good. Self love is important as well so I suppose I'm reframing today as about self love & being grateful I'm not in a bad relationship, have good friends, am getting my financial house in order (even delving into the world of investment), and according to one friend "lead a glamorous life." Plus, I've got more possibilities and opportunities ahead of me on so many fronts that I'm starting to see.Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-81970488732529151902019-12-23T11:46:00.001-08:002019-12-23T11:49:43.367-08:00The Surreal Adventures of The Angry Redheaded Lawyer: “A Cocktail Party Social Experiment” by Wil Petre at Chelsea Music HallThe concept of “A Cocktail Party Social Experiment” is to forge real time connection with your fellow party goers. Smartphones were strictly prohibited at this event (no silent mode or airplane mode!!). However, if you are a non-drinker like me you did have the option of something non-alcoholic. In my case, I chose seltzer with lime. The seltzer was definitely fizzy, probably more fizzy than I typically get it. That put a smile on my face.<br />
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For those unfamiliar with Chelsea Music Hall, it's a venue tucked in plain sight right near the Chelsea Market and other more familiar haunts in the Meatpacking District. I was directed to the basement (which, even if you wanted to have an Internet connection to use your smartphone you likely wouldn't be getting). Being an introvert, it's probably interesting + ironic that I chose this event to review (though I'd have to correct you & explain than I'm an ambivert, which means if you talk to me I'll have a conversation with you and not be an ass unless you behave like one towards me). My ambivert self was definitely wondering at first whether this would be my scene since I came alone with no crowd & even smiling at random people tends to lead them to conclusions I'd rather they not assume (I'm out of THAT phase of my divorce & even when I was in it, I had standards). Call it a combo of the New Yorker in me and the massive crowd. I liked the jazz feel of the venue as well as the rows of lights on the ceiling and the pushed out look of that ceiling. There were also some repeat attendees at this event, which at first I found odd until we went through it.<br />
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Before the show, you have the option of putting your name in a bucket (perhaps the one I saw labeled “test subjects”?) to be drawn at random. If your name comes up, you are invited to the cocktail party. This party takes place on the stage where our host and creator of the event, Wil Petre guides the action along with various organizers in lab coats. There was also a random question asked in paper form to audience members: What is the thing you dread or are most excited about concerning the holidays? (I'm paraphrasing this). I saw people write their responses then stick them in a bucket labeled “samples” so I followed suit.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-1jPG334I-ZcXofGONEyVyXmY6P0G9EUPcfg2cTRWdD0o2EBvFMZqqfKO9t4hmonmfKd2ai2ABCAxZAHEY7OaobejC0459OloRCxDY1J0jJaS9FgZX0wEFTCWU_HzOjkvuEsjXG1R-g4/s1600/Wil+%2526+His+Lovely+Assistant+-+Photo+by+Karen+May.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-1jPG334I-ZcXofGONEyVyXmY6P0G9EUPcfg2cTRWdD0o2EBvFMZqqfKO9t4hmonmfKd2ai2ABCAxZAHEY7OaobejC0459OloRCxDY1J0jJaS9FgZX0wEFTCWU_HzOjkvuEsjXG1R-g4/s320/Wil+%2526+His+Lovely+Assistant+-+Photo+by+Karen+May.jpg" width="320" height="213" data-original-width="799" data-original-height="533" /></a></div><i>Wil & His Lovely Assistant - Photo by Karen May</i> <br />
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So once our guests were established, (though one was a late comer; there's always one in every group) the game began. For you old school folk, they had an overhead projector to display where we were in this event and what cards were selected. The way this works is there's a host who picks someone to draw cards. Our “guest of honor” draws a large card and a small card.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgS-KK3aPMYX6138t9ZRh54_jGfw1p424h_cNUxfAG6r3X7O5CRb-Hez0Iu6bHxqF3ii8f-LbHswMYd4hHo7LoO7Odv-dgTSKQ0dtGSz5XOSprB6OEuZjURqBvha-pGaTGCeDJLmyehbf8/s1600/Cards+-+Photo+by+Karen+May.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgS-KK3aPMYX6138t9ZRh54_jGfw1p424h_cNUxfAG6r3X7O5CRb-Hez0Iu6bHxqF3ii8f-LbHswMYd4hHo7LoO7Odv-dgTSKQ0dtGSz5XOSprB6OEuZjURqBvha-pGaTGCeDJLmyehbf8/s320/Cards+-+Photo+by+Karen+May.jpg" width="320" height="213" data-original-width="799" data-original-height="533" /></a></div><i>Cards - Photo by Karen May</i> <br />
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The images on the cards chosen are displayed on this overhead projector (seeing it made me think of this elementary school classmate who lived in my neighborhood & was known as the local ruffian but never bothered me; he said every time our teacher used the overhead, he'd get sleepy).<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBNT3jY83NHoC_PSUqvvG0mcOx2M-1NePhon0W-M7UYRSE8CZguyQlDb3UN54ES14CtT0Y1gks6qIQ4_7sKurNOFVKfQUgucrtMqQqDPL3d05hlmFzpJlXih3H0C3nh3X5A-d-U6CrdKE/s1600/Wil+%2526+the+Overhead+Projector+-+Photo+by+Karen+May.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBNT3jY83NHoC_PSUqvvG0mcOx2M-1NePhon0W-M7UYRSE8CZguyQlDb3UN54ES14CtT0Y1gks6qIQ4_7sKurNOFVKfQUgucrtMqQqDPL3d05hlmFzpJlXih3H0C3nh3X5A-d-U6CrdKE/s320/Wil+%2526+the+Overhead+Projector+-+Photo+by+Karen+May.jpg" width="320" height="213" data-original-width="799" data-original-height="533" /></a></div><i>Wil & the Overhead Projector - Photo by Karen May</i> <br />
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The host has a book that decodes what these cards mean. Based on what the cards mean, the host asks our guest of honor a question. Here are the questions that came up at this event:<br />
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1. What is your body capable of?<br />
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2. If you had to do it again, what would you do differently?<br />
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3. In what way could a stranger think you're mysterious?<br />
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4. Who is gone but not forgotten?<br />
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5. Do your relationships define who you are? Why or why not?<br />
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6. From what have you been tempted to throw up your hands & walk away?<br />
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7. For what in your life do you feel the most grateful?<br />
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8. Of what could you say you're a master of?<br />
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Deep stuff, right? The first question got a laugh and if you don't know why, you definitely don't belong at this event because you're either too young or too dim (I wouldn't bring my young kids though if the venue didn't serve alcohol, older teens might be okay). The guest of honor is also given the beverage of their heart's desire before being called to answer.<br />
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So after the guest of honor answers the question, that individual picks another “guest of honor” who goes through the same process. The person who invited me to this event actually was one of the guests of honor and I learned something about her that it turns out might become relevant to my professional endeavors. The story she told was definitely one that connected with the audience.<br />
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However, the answers to these questions went in all kinds of directions. From humor to sadness to social justice matters and insight you might not necessarily pick up just walking along in your day to day life. One guy who was picked said that he was an introvert and shy about such matters but had put his name into the bucket thinking he'd not get picked and due to peer pressure from friends.<br />
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This game actually reminded me of Cards Against Humanity (which I didn't get in the divorce & I debated on picking up a year ago when I saw a starter pack on sale at Target). If you've not played that, you should if you're old enough; it's not a game for the easily offended or the younger set. <br />
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Knowing the history of how Cards Against Humanity came to be (my ex actually got some of the online exclusive packs), I wondered if this has been mass marketed. The host told us that they're working on this. I could definitely see this being a game lawyers could enjoy, the intellectuals that we are.<br />
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However, since you can't play at home yet you do get the option to see this show in person and gain insight on your fellow audience members along with their life experiences. It would be interesting to see how this might play out in areas outside of Chelsea, Manhattan. What about the Midwest or the South or some area where there is less variation on national origin, life experience and the like? I still think even in those atmospheres you'd gain some insight and perspective that you didn't previously have. These are the kinds of events and games where you get to know someone and certainly in a more meaningful way than you do on the Internet or through Facebook/Instagram/other social media networks people are using. I also like that this isn't a game where you have to be an expert in something to have any fun or gain any value from it. When people were more short with their answers or had less to say, fellow guests would probe further and follow up on what they said so if you were more quiet you'd definitely not get lost in the blur of extroverts and loudness that typically happen.<br />
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If you're tired of the lack of human connection, you really need to check out this show. Perhaps you can help make this game happen so the masses can be amused and informed, another Cards Against Humanity if you will.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJ_hO7qKKjliqLxLbY_C1KrS-nwsAwBdyp4kG0-ag2ZoAE1k4I_buEYpGfuP-0G2CQHmZhi8J-gYqxNQiA01CBf_Lk30LtiYgKmQXYHp90yDhXxf2V8NsT2-IVrQGdN_TJrXfFVq35xYk/s1600/The+Cocktail+Party+Experiment+in+Progress+-+Photo+by+Karen+May.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJ_hO7qKKjliqLxLbY_C1KrS-nwsAwBdyp4kG0-ag2ZoAE1k4I_buEYpGfuP-0G2CQHmZhi8J-gYqxNQiA01CBf_Lk30LtiYgKmQXYHp90yDhXxf2V8NsT2-IVrQGdN_TJrXfFVq35xYk/s320/The+Cocktail+Party+Experiment+in+Progress+-+Photo+by+Karen+May.jpg" width="320" height="213" data-original-width="799" data-original-height="533" /></a></div><i>The Cocktail Party Experiment in Progress - Photo by Karen May</i>Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-92038155530549187142019-10-12T13:55:00.001-07:002019-10-12T13:55:29.234-07:00The Surreal Adventures of The Angry Redheaded Lawyer: "Singin' in the ER!" by Ruby Lynn Reyner at Theater for the New CityFirst off, please don't bring your young kids to this. Seriously, DO NOT BRING YOUR KIDS!!!!! Unless maybe you're comfortable discussing sexually charged topics or you'd like to explain to your young one just how Herve got up there, don't bring minor children. This show is not for small kids or your puritanical family members (like my mother, though she surprises me sometimes). It IS, however, for those with a punk sensibility and a wicked sense of humor as this show is chocked full of that along with cleverness. I came with a friend of mine who's also a blogger & likes theater. Make sure you go check out her <a href="https://tablespoonsandteaspoons.com/">blog</a>.<br />
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Our story follows the goings on at St. Vickies, the hospital where maybe you'll be in tiptop shape again in no time. But do you REALLY want to be? After all, Dr. Shlong (Levi Wise) is the man with the healing hands and the bedroom eyes. Amanda Reckonwith (Ruby Lynn Reyner, who's also the director and writer of this tale) would certainly agree as a former Broadway star who's had her fair share of men and good times. She comes to St. Vickies with a few aliments, including a serious pain in her lady areas. With some dedicated medical attention, Dr. Shlong finds none other than Herve Villechaize of “Fantasy Island” fame. Even Amanda doesn't know how he got there but he's conflicted between his freedom and the comfort of Amanda's warm nether regions.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQjLyfMU3HW5_o5xjmRDOfJR8SfFYS3uwsOLaMwagGpvQ_ugOh4PkGsnJQTTh0WA8irbFm66muSWJCZCxBu5SYXnNDdvwW7vVtYne1V9ZZdvdhBV89gtpvYaycrO-eOa8OIf5p-toA0gk/s1600/Injured+Lady%252C+Nurse+Dynel%252C+Scabby+%2526+Dr.+Schlong.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQjLyfMU3HW5_o5xjmRDOfJR8SfFYS3uwsOLaMwagGpvQ_ugOh4PkGsnJQTTh0WA8irbFm66muSWJCZCxBu5SYXnNDdvwW7vVtYne1V9ZZdvdhBV89gtpvYaycrO-eOa8OIf5p-toA0gk/s320/Injured+Lady%252C+Nurse+Dynel%252C+Scabby+%2526+Dr.+Schlong.JPG" width="320" height="218" data-original-width="927" data-original-height="632" /></a></div><i>L-R: Mila Levine, Robin Brenner,Xan Aspero, Levi Wise. Behind: musician Mary E. Rodriguez</i><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgawM45DL5TblsLd616bjKQ5UTM-Dtwsf1wsdLiEUuUQUgUfeleGjDFNkkphcC_wW1A8bQnhN9ZSbvgS-2PKmLmr-5jZ1AFkIlU9irKYEtuPy_Xh4LoWxZKLGqPCmYoTqJxgghAJG3F5Ts/s1600/Amanda.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgawM45DL5TblsLd616bjKQ5UTM-Dtwsf1wsdLiEUuUQUgUfeleGjDFNkkphcC_wW1A8bQnhN9ZSbvgS-2PKmLmr-5jZ1AFkIlU9irKYEtuPy_Xh4LoWxZKLGqPCmYoTqJxgghAJG3F5Ts/s320/Amanda.JPG" width="265" height="320" data-original-width="523" data-original-height="632" /></a></div><i>Ruby Lynn Reyner as Amanda Reckonwith</i><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwD2uVYO3kkLowGS6r8euOptilMnZ4fCeVZhJfuttysf5FbBAFga4zKhfjJvODrS_uKXDoy4rDVB2Bi4RunknzNstXf5JidnItosFu2dWX8HOLojlUnBwdKOPcF1yeSofTctYfddCwGB4/s1600/Amanda+Giving+Birth.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwD2uVYO3kkLowGS6r8euOptilMnZ4fCeVZhJfuttysf5FbBAFga4zKhfjJvODrS_uKXDoy4rDVB2Bi4RunknzNstXf5JidnItosFu2dWX8HOLojlUnBwdKOPcF1yeSofTctYfddCwGB4/s320/Amanda+Giving+Birth.JPG" width="293" height="320" data-original-width="578" data-original-height="632" /></a></div><i>Amanda Reckonwith gives birth. L-R: Levi Wise, Ruby Lynn Reyner, Xan Aspero</i><br />
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Nurse Dynel (Robin Brenner) was absolutely awesome as she says the things you figure most nurses want to say in real life but know they can't. She is not a woman who is kind to the patients, especially Scabby (Richard Craven) the junkie who seems to have taken up de facto residence at the hospital and Amanda who she claims is only there to see Dr. Shlong for her own extracurricular purposes. Like in real life, it's Nurse Dynel who's really running the show as she informs Dr. Shlong that she'll have to inform his wife about his dalliances if he doesn't play ball.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqhWZcRkNhRVaKj6dZtZxMur7eFW8PiNfmmxrhsh3WMy32KAYiYTyk5lX2gtTnVxMyVJ2qT0feKArQ1IaNiuZgrPnuMWBsvOmahqCJiXdPFA24yUMQ60GjSxxhWPor0y-NKqMHKmfLll4/s1600/Nurse+Dynel+%2526+Scabby.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqhWZcRkNhRVaKj6dZtZxMur7eFW8PiNfmmxrhsh3WMy32KAYiYTyk5lX2gtTnVxMyVJ2qT0feKArQ1IaNiuZgrPnuMWBsvOmahqCJiXdPFA24yUMQ60GjSxxhWPor0y-NKqMHKmfLll4/s320/Nurse+Dynel+%2526+Scabby.JPG" width="320" height="240" data-original-width="843" data-original-height="632" /></a></div><i>Robin Brenner, Richard Craven</i><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_iOmF7wfRErP6N0E3vrYn8E_vOw-M6Zy0a0Ob73XuYvIHEPoXQaI_nX4xt5s6l0cBam8FhfVTDtyL1OoqxZKu-YGkax3dKROp3zI4RWuW9AWLZhh4VCIpbaxUTi1iPjWZXo4imw_9rKQ/s1600/Dr.+Shlong+%2526+Nurse+Dynel.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_iOmF7wfRErP6N0E3vrYn8E_vOw-M6Zy0a0Ob73XuYvIHEPoXQaI_nX4xt5s6l0cBam8FhfVTDtyL1OoqxZKu-YGkax3dKROp3zI4RWuW9AWLZhh4VCIpbaxUTi1iPjWZXo4imw_9rKQ/s320/Dr.+Shlong+%2526+Nurse+Dynel.JPG" width="320" height="240" data-original-width="843" data-original-height="632" /></a></div><i>Levi Wise, Robin Brenner</i><br />
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There's also Jennifer Berkowitz (Joyce Miller), the dedicated social worker who decides to turn over a new leaf after meeting with Scabby (or “Skuh-bee” as she calls him) and Dr. Doomskya (Laura Pruden) who had the coolest costuming with IV tubes in her hair as pins. Don't dare call Dr. Doomskya “Mrs. Kevorkian” even if that's literally her function at the hospital. Nurse Dynel will also let you know that “die” and “crazy” are also forbidden terms at St. Vickies. There's also some additional craziness but let's leave a few surprises, shall we?<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4-3VmyTLBeDrbiBQSlVs6L-k3tynxwKovdjpqoZnXD-ta3Jq-K21JhWRyZBR2cGNUN22mfHSTrBbNYzSUhv4tiK1wHxpRBOzR0uWFtqqr0aZG3P1RaPrgC51kkalCQ-J2fA34ZnYQLA0/s1600/Social+Worker+%2526+Scabby.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4-3VmyTLBeDrbiBQSlVs6L-k3tynxwKovdjpqoZnXD-ta3Jq-K21JhWRyZBR2cGNUN22mfHSTrBbNYzSUhv4tiK1wHxpRBOzR0uWFtqqr0aZG3P1RaPrgC51kkalCQ-J2fA34ZnYQLA0/s320/Social+Worker+%2526+Scabby.JPG" width="320" height="240" data-original-width="843" data-original-height="632" /></a></div><i>Richard Craven, Joyce Miller</i><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJ0cEMC69sxc7EQrdJ4Go5XkpYXV1YIerkcIaIXbpBGbxjejy3WBzbVbhtidYGCTXyBAWwjeo8ztid2eFdNd6rZigJIR5RnYMgQhVLfHJp49_FvfDjB-rDUhIDa08LgVeaG2uPEfmHvG4/s1600/Dr.+Doomskya.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJ0cEMC69sxc7EQrdJ4Go5XkpYXV1YIerkcIaIXbpBGbxjejy3WBzbVbhtidYGCTXyBAWwjeo8ztid2eFdNd6rZigJIR5RnYMgQhVLfHJp49_FvfDjB-rDUhIDa08LgVeaG2uPEfmHvG4/s320/Dr.+Doomskya.JPG" width="320" height="240" data-original-width="843" data-original-height="632" /></a></div><i>Laura Pruden</i><br />
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The décor for this show was awesome. I loved the blood splattered on the wall & the IV in Dr. Doomskya's hair. The nurse narrator (Sara Cook) was great with exposition and seemed a great contrast to the commanding presence of Nurse Dynel. She seemed like the nurse you'd hope to get if you were at St. Vickies. You also must hear the songs in person, especially “Biggest Balls” and the title song “Singin' in the ER.”<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyUkE3BSYv3-RNBSOXu8MadFODOjj-XFUvF6dsH9yndldvsOapyc43rQowDJKVy9Qcgs4h3cnMxLKdTEqC4Np_RQKNOTX0iqT0A-IKWGi2vlCiZEVOVQAxMrCb7Ny6cESFlMAsw3OGu6k/s1600/Exposition+Nurse.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyUkE3BSYv3-RNBSOXu8MadFODOjj-XFUvF6dsH9yndldvsOapyc43rQowDJKVy9Qcgs4h3cnMxLKdTEqC4Np_RQKNOTX0iqT0A-IKWGi2vlCiZEVOVQAxMrCb7Ny6cESFlMAsw3OGu6k/s320/Exposition+Nurse.JPG" width="320" height="240" data-original-width="843" data-original-height="632" /></a></div><i>Sara Cook. Behind: musician Mary E. Rodriguez</i><br />
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I went into this as someone who's spent some time in hospitals, more recently when my father was unconscious then unplugged from life support and to visit a friend undergoing treatment for gastrointestinal matters. They aren't the most fun places and I've heard great tales of the gallows humor permeating in the medical profession. Since humor is the best way to cope with tragedy in my book, this show was certainly intriguing to me. It actually went to an entirely new level of humor I didn't quite expect. My friend, who I'd learned that evening had worked in a hospital before, also got a kick out of this show. It definitely fits into that old school NYC sensibility so if you've been missing that, go see this one ASAP.Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-16784668019511066512019-09-15T21:04:00.003-07:002019-09-15T21:04:49.044-07:00Jury Duty: Why People Hate Doing It & How We Can Fix ItRecently, I was called to jury duty. I ended up getting it postponed since I had things to do in the next 3 days. For those of you outside the US, the US has mandatory jury service for citizens and you generally get called for it at random. You only have to do it something like every 6 years but if you're called, you must go & nobody is exempt from it.<br />
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It seems a very desirable county in my city has a dark side: if you're called to jury duty you're told to allot at least 3 days of your life to do it at the whopping rate of $40 a day for a full 8 hour day. This is lower than both the state and federal minimum wage. There also seems to be no concern for economic hardship if you are self-employed & missing higher paying assignments means you could be in danger of not being able to pay your rent, utility bills, car payments, other necessary bills that not paying will cause your life to suffer in a very negative way (like being homeless, not having electricity or Internet access, not having a car in a locale where there's no viable public transit which means you'll eventually lose your job because you can't get there or do it, especially with no Internet, no telephone to call anyone or be reached at, no food, etc.).<br />
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When I did jury duty in a different county, I only had to be there for one day. It was a lot of waiting around, they called me for a case, excused me then I got to go home. No, in this "desirable" county there's a ballot system where if you are rejected for one case, you have to give your ballot back and they may draw your number AGAIN with seemingly no end in sight. I opted for an adjournment since I had planned assignments and didn't care to lose $500+ in not doing those assignments. I figure with prior planning, I can just clear my schedule and let people know I'm free the day before if things don't take as long as the clerks involved with jury duty tell you they will. The clerk where I was said "If you can't commit the whole day to the next 3 days, you should leave right now and get a postponement." I opted for a time where I might get fewer assignments & hopefully will face less stress.<br />
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One big thing about jury duty is you'd better bring something to do. Ideally you'll want something not involving electricity or technology like books or writing material. I'd thought of doing writing while I was in jury duty as well as doing legal CLEs; hey, if you have time to kill you may as well do legal CLEs (which I have never found exciting or interesting; maybe it's because most of the programs I've done had nothing to do with entertainment law & few speakers have an engaging, passionate style that makes you stand up and take notice). From my own conversations with lawyers, many aren't enthused with the whole CLE thing and view it more as taking medicine than learning useful things about their particular practice area. Saving the outlines and materials is always a good thing so you have those resources for later if the subject matter comes up but most lawyers are so freaking busy they don't have time to watch and pay full attention to this stuff. The CLE provider probably also factors in here since some offer more interesting courses than others. One lawyer I've heard about bills himself as a "comedian of law" & that just builds up expectations of fun in my mind. I want to see if this guy lives up to the hype sometime. Another thing about CLE courses is that many are pricey. But it's a requirement and if you HAVE to be someplace anyway, that's making productive use of your time. I've also watched some courses while taking Amtrak to see my family (a train ride lasting at least 10 hours, usually longer when there are delays). This aspect you can plan for.<br />
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I guess if you're also inclined, you could use jury duty as a pickup scene & get to know hot prospective jurors who also want to leave & can think of better things they could be doing. Why not, right? That's better than harassing women on Facebook or LinkedIn under the guise of business networking. There were some hotties when I went; maybe there will be more next time & some will have the balls to approach me. I always like to see about prospective networking as well so if that can happen, what the hey? Another productive use of time.<br />
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But let's see: <b>Why</b> would you want me to be on your jury when my presence is NOT being compensated by my employer (as I'm self-employed) & I'm worrying about the loss of income from being there? What type of objectivity or any sense of fairness are you going to get from a juror who resents the state stealing their income by forcing them to work for below city, state and federal minimum wage? Attorneys used to be exempt from jury duty by virtue of being attorneys. This apparently is no longer the case yet attorneys make significantly more money, know how trials work and could easily sway non-attorneys on that jury to agree with them if they have some bias against the accused or the prosecution. I was hoping maybe me knowing a lot of attorneys in my city could get me kicked out since you can't be on the jury of a lawyer you know personally (the other side would assume you're going to side with your friend's client or if it's an enemy, your enemy will presume you're going to nail their client). Solo practitioners are being taken away from clients & not getting compensated by anybody else so why shouldn't they be exempt? Same for appearance attorneys like yours truly. Entire practices could crumble from such requirements. Isn't that screwing over other people who might have cases going to jury trials?<br />
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Honestly, though I think you'd get fewer people objecting if they were paid at least minimum wage for the city, state or country. If someone isn't being compensated by an employer, they would not have to worry they'd lose their home or ability to work due to jury service. Minimum wage at least would make people feel less resentful about serving & you wouldn't have people doing what Pauly Shore's character did in "Jury Duty" (see that movie if you haven't; I was so happy one of my Facebook friends actually knew that movie when I mentioned it since it's somewhat obscure and many people don't get my obscure references). Money for lunch would also be nice. Weirdly, I'm not even sure what's in the area of the courthouse where I have to serve. I know it for the county I served in before.<br />
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I've heard some great lines to use to get out of jury duty as well that I could consider but for now, these are my ideas for why people don't like doing it and how we could fix that.Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-55635552951451885002019-09-02T22:27:00.001-07:002019-09-02T22:27:30.455-07:00A Basic Lesson in Entertainment Networking with a "Gorgeous" Entertainment Attorney (Or Really, Any Professional)If you haven't faced this problem as a woman, consider yourself damn lucky or extremely ugly.<br />
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What problem am I speaking of? Business networking or attempting to meet people in your industry. This little problem is worse if you're A) society's definition of "smoking hot" and/or B) work in an industry known for its casual, laid back atmosphere such as entertainment.<br />
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The entertainment field is one of those places where you either fit in like a glove or you're a square peg in a round hole. One hazard of entertainment, as many of us are certainly aware, is being hit on. Typically this is men hitting on women, particularly attractive women. It's very common for actresses and models but it can also happen if you work in other jobs like as a producer, an assistant and even if you're an entertainment attorney. Women probably do it as well but that's a topic for the straight men and the lesbians to weigh in on; the straight rolls off me like a stench so women don't hit on me.<br />
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Now when you're an entertainment attorney & experience this, it's just completely fucked up. I mean, the word "lawyer" inspires shock and terror and respect among many an entertainment professional. They figure the lawyer is going to mess them up in some fashion or destroy their enemies in some epic manner to where they'll think they've been castrated, suffered a massive blow to the head, had an orgasm that blew their brain right out of their head, SOMETHING scary, epic, intense, life changing and usually terrible. Smart people don't fuck around with lawyers or people who have them. Many still tell me that lawyers are a figure that inspire respect, awe and the like among creatives though many distrust and dislike them by the nature of that job. I think many also feel lawyers are cold, don't understand the art/craft part of the industry and will walk right past some shivering, starving family on the street without a wit of concern for their welfare.<br />
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When you're an actress/model or work in some other job where being pretty is required, this is simply an occupational hazard. Most people who do those jobs encounter plenty of this in their real lives as well no matter what they wear, how neatly their hair is brushed, even if they've gotten enough sleep the night before. I've gone out in my worst and STILL gotten hit on by guys. I remember this even happening when I was a teenager though my mother was super strict and glared at guys who checked me out, I couldn't buy a date in high school (I've since learned my male peers were likely too intimated by my looks and my brain, a hazard I still live to this day) & it's almost never the guys I WANT approaching me.<br />
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But while you expect this generally if you're an actress or model, you don't expect this to come up in places like the classroom or on job searching sites like LinkedIn. You don't expect it in the context of business networking events or when you're responding to friend requests from people who work in the same industry as you or when you're at work in your career.<br />
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Ever hear of the saying "Don't shit where you eat?" This means, don't have beyond platonic relationships with people who work in your industry. Do you want to be known as the actress who only got a role in a film because you were fucking the director? Do you want to be the model who's only walking in the show because you slept with the photographer or producer? How about the attorney who only got the client because you were dating him?<br />
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The mere <b>appearance</b> of having gotten something because of a personal relationship is bad enough. The inevitable gossip and breakup aftermath are even worse.<br />
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So, for the men here's why you DON'T hit on women in a business context or if you work in the same industry as her:<br />
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1. Nobody of worth wants to be known as a casting couch ho. People don't think kindly of casting couch hoes. They are a scourge on the industry, diminish those with actual talent & prevent anyone from honestly getting ahead since everyone receives the message "you won't get anywhere here no matter how good you are at your job if you don't fuck me." I & others of like mind see this and think "what's the fucking point of dealing with you since you're an obstruction to my progress?"<br />
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2. Have you been asleep for the Harvey Weinstein scandal? Or other sexual harassment scandals? If some woman isn't interested or loses interest, she can easily accuse you of trying to use your industry power to fuck with her career or imply that you said a breakup or rejection would result in her not getting roles or even getting blacklisted.<br />
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3. Do you like having your sex life and proclivities being public knowledge & a topic of gossip? I don't. Most women tend to get bashed in those sessions and viewed as whores. It doesn't lead to women being respected or valued for their brain cells or their abilities outside of a sexual context.<br />
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4. Do you stay friends with all your exes? Or are all of your exes dead to you, like mine are? I don't want to see, hear about or know my exes. I prefer to think they're dead or in some other universe far away from me. Dating in your industry means if you break up, you'll probably have to see that person again or deal with them in a business context. <br />
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Can you be professional in that instance? Most people can't. I would rather not put myself in that situation in the first place. I don't care to get fucked over by an angry ex or see someone who refuses to leave me alone to live my life without them.<br />
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5. In the case of an attorney, you're implying that woman has to sleep with clients to get their business since she's otherwise too inept to get or keep clients with her personality or her brain or her legal skills. In other words, you're calling her stupid & incompetent. Attorneys <b>REALLY</b> don't like being called stupid or treated as though they are stupid.<br />
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Perhaps you're also insulting actresses and models here by implying that they're not good enough on their own merits to get ahead and have to fuck you to get work. Some may do it but I think anyone of worth or talent would refuse to play that game.<br />
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Here's another free piece of advice: stop bitching at women who call you out when you've sent a flirtatious message just like every other cretin who's not approached them in a professional manner.<br />
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I've had a few guys get pissy at me when I told them straight up that if they have a romantic intention towards me, I'm not interested or that they can go to my Facebook fan page if they want to just see the pretty pictures. Just this evening, I had one send me a friend request who I'd wondered if he also worked in the industry being Facebook friends with numerous friends I know who work in the business.<br />
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His first message to me is telling me how he thinks my pics are "cute, sassy & yes sexy!" then inviting me to check out his profile, saying we might have things in common & inviting me to "chat sometime."<br />
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Seeing as this is someone I see no information on and know nothing about, I state that if he's only sent me this friend request to proposition me romantically that doesn't work for me and I'd wanted to know if he worked in my industry as I see all our mutual contacts are from that field. I also mention that I've got a fan page specifically for people just seeking pretty pics instead of reading my views on various issues (I don't fit inside a neat little box and lots of people get pissy at things I have to say on topics they may not agree with me on).<br />
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I figure I'll get a normal, sane response giving me answers and determining if this is some leftist lunatic who's going to try censoring me on my own page (since I believe in taking preemptive measures to avoid hassles whenever you can). Instead I get a snarky response like I'm supposed to know who he is (I don't & still don't; this is not some guy with a household name and even if he were, that wouldn't impress me since I'm not some ho who drops her drawers without talking to a guy and seeing if I at least like his personality).<br />
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I respond stating the role of an entertainment attorney isn't to kiss your ass, suck your dick or stroke your ego & the lunacy of expecting not only an entertainment attorney but a natural redhead to do that. I concluded with "How about NOT insulting my intelligence? Thanks."<br />
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When a guy gets defensive and snarky in response to a message like the one I wrote, I conclude he's nothing but a cretin with no pure intention in speaking to me. I don't think "Oh, I'm such an awful person" since I'm polite & professional while saying <b>IF</b> your intention is romantic, I'm not interested. Plenty of people who did have romantic intentions didn't act like toddlers when I wrote such a message and replied in a respectful manner. Plenty of guys respect my right to have preferences that don't include them as well as my right not to want to be seen as some casting couch ho.<br />
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Guys, if you think some woman is attractive don't make that your lead in conversation. Attractive women in particular will be on guard for that and they'll think you're just another cretin wasting their time. We have online dating apps and Instagram for romantic overtures so go there if you want to do that. Just remember that if you work in the same field and could be in a supervisory or decision making role over someone or could be their client, you're probably not getting considered & will offend the person in question. <br />
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You can ask NICELY, PROFESSIONALLY and POLITELY in the context of Instagram or an online dating app since people expect that to be your purpose on those sites & generally don't do business networking there but you need to actually talk to that woman as a human being with functioning brain cells and see if you like her conversation before you spring that on her. A lawyer asking me out on one of those sites is different from one asking me out during a work assignment or on LinkedIn. One lawyer simply handed me his business card with his number written down on it, which I thought was a classy & acceptable way of making that intent known without putting me on the spot at work (he also wasn't my adversary on a case).<br />
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I never experienced this shit in my academic career as a student in college or law school & I probably would have felt even less flattered in those situations. Clearly some guys who work in entertainment will never make competent law professors. My father would have killed some professors who tried that, I'm quite certain.<br />
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I feel like we should not have to have to vocalize this lesson. Why isn't the #metoo movement addressing it but instead demonizing ALL men & making them not want to mentor or hire women? I don't think all men are evil and I'm no delicate flower but some seem not to think about the perspective of the woman reading this stuff or what her perception of the author is. Are they fucking stupid? Over sexed? Suffering from delusions of hotness? What's the deal?<br />
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And for fucks sake, if you're going to approach a woman at least live in the same fucking STATE!!! If you don't live in the same geographic area as me or regularly come to my region (at least weekly), then you are wasting my time. I already have a long distance sort of boyfriend & he's probably much better looking than you are, not to mention he was there in the hard times so I know he can be trusted while I don't know shit about you. <br />
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I also don't waste my time on men who make my ex-husband look like Brad Pitt in terms of looks or money so <b>know your audience</b> before you send such messages!! Models are not going out with dudes who don't even rank on the average scale in looks unless they've got tons of money they'll be spending on them. If you hate that reality, I suggest you go fix yourself in looks or in job prospects or attitude. Don't come bitching to me or anyone outside of a qualified therapist about your unrealistic expectations. You're not entitled to anyone, period. Women have free will & the right to make their own decisions on such matters; if you have a problem with that, move to a foreign country where women are second class citizens and go date women who live there. Women in the US aren't putting up with that shit.Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-10340597786301409422019-08-16T23:02:00.002-07:002019-08-16T23:02:24.825-07:00Hello, Time Wasting PrickI think this is how I'm going to start messages guys send me on any kind of platform or how I greet guys who've made it clear they've got interest in me since it seems to be such a fragile thing. Double for guys who I wouldn't normally consider who've made that effort to approach me. There's a reason for this:<br />
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Last week, I get a message from a guy on Instagram. I don't do dating apps these days and don't really spend time trying to do the guy pursuit since I'm out of that phase, would rather focus on my career stuff and really need to be getting back to writing about my experiences and using those to create art. Also, like many people, I find dating way too stressful with too much time wasting and game playing. I've been through a divorce, lost a parent and lived as a transient. You don't treat someone who's lived that stuff like they're some naive idiot who's lived nothing. <br />
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I thought maybe this was some guy I had a date with eons back who faded away and then showed up again. That happens to me a lot, from guys I met in Phase 1 to guys I met later on when I still bothered with dating apps. Some have managed to linger around an obscene amount of time. They're not actual exes since we never really dated. <br />
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I only have one guy I truly chose exclusivity with since my ex-husband (Mr. Big Stuff) and he's not in NYC at the moment; if he did something awful, he'd actually become an ex since that connection is far more meaningful to me & if he lived here again, I'd be fine with resuming our old relationship. It's unfinished business.<br />
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This guy, however, was someone I met in a work context. He lauds how smart I am and how he likes my writing style. Okay...<br />
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So he asks me about getting coffee and talking. I'm like "okay, but I insist on exchanging cell numbers since I've had dates fall apart because I couldn't get to the messaging platform from lack of Internet connection." We do this, he asks me complex questions that I answer with proper clarity & length. He makes a whole big thing about wanting to hang out with me & so forth. We make plans for Monday.<br />
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Monday afternoon comes & I get a text from him saying he's going to see about working things out with his ex, who's just contacted him. He tells me "I want to be friends" and "thanks for understanding" without a word from me. Oh, and ditches me on these plans after I've made arrangements to get my laundry picked up the next evening so I'd be free that night. I told him of this and said beforehand that if he bailed, I'd be irate (you would be too if you were running out of clean undies).<br />
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I promptly get my pickup changed for that evening, inform him of the fact that I'm from the "exes are dead to me" school, tell him precisely what my ex-husband did and why it's more likely I'd get a sex change than ever be friends with that jerk and that my friends take me out, don't ditch me, including one who has a jealous girlfriend & works in the same field we do and would never let their girlfriends dictate who they talk to or spend time with. I'm envisioning a conversation and see no reason this guy can't do that if he's indeed as interested as he claims to be. I also say "see why my sort of boyfriend (Mr. Big Stuff) is up here and everyone else is down there?" after telling him just why that guy became my first exclusive boyfriend by choice and how he made amends to me after doing me wrong, me calling him out, blocking him and saying "fuck you." Most men wouldn't bother talking to that woman again or apologizing to her (especially someone you know never apologizes for anything) so I felt like he must actually care about me if he went to all that trouble & didn't get scared after I told him off.<br />
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24 hours later as jerk from Instagram hasn't responded to my points, I leave a voicemail telling him to do me a favor and pretend he doesn't know me if he sees me in a work context then block him from all sources. I notice that he unfollowed me on Instagram before I made this call and figured I'd block him.<br />
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That friend with the jealous girlfriend told me he thinks this guy actually has a girlfriend and made shit up because he got caught or got remorse.<br />
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This comes after a guy I'd been talking to for ages flakes on me for a basic lunch plan while we're both in the same area. I blocked him from everything as well since this was strike two and though he may not have malice, he doesn't have my best interests at heart and I feel that's a boundary I need to set or he'll never learn. People learn how to treat you based on the boundaries you set. If you just complain and take no action, people learn that your words are meaningless.<br />
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Go nuclear or go home, right?<br />
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So I'm thinking to myself "How do I prevent this shit in the future, aside from telling guys I hate liars (as I did specifically tell this one)?" Telling any guy who might be remotely suitable that I'll assume he's a time wasting prick until he proves otherwise could be effective. The kind of guy I'd consider would find my greeting a challenge or hysterical. I don't like guys with no sense of humor and I hate guys who are bigger wimps than me. Beta males are so not my interest.<br />
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This guy also made the mistake of telling me how I felt and what he was in my life. Nope!!! You don't tell <b>ME</b> who you are to me or how <i>I</i> feel. Ever. I told him this as well and that only <b>I</b> get to decide if you're my friend and how I feel about something.<br />
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I was not understanding since A) I don't do being ditched, B) I don't do bullshit platitudes like "we'll be friends" with no opportunity to discuss it (contrary to any "friend" behavior) and C) I'm not some ordinary woman who's dumb as a post. You'll respect my intelligence and be straight with me. If you're just wasting my time, I'll have more respect for you if you just admit it. <br />
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If you're not interested, you're better off just telling me since I might still think you're a loser but I won't think you're also a disrespectful asshole (or "a rat" or "a super rat" if you wish to use Holy Golightly speak if you've seen "Breakfast at Tiffany's"; I just watched that movie again today). At one time, my life was a cross between "Breakfast at Tiffany's" and "Midnight Cowboy". If you're a straight guy, I can forgive you not seeing "Breakfast at Tiffany's" but you'd better be seeing "Midnight Cowboy" if you haven't already; it's a classic though it's extremely depressing. <br />
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Women who've been through the things I have deserve respect for our intelligence & not a furthering of our cynicism and trust issues. You want to bitch about why some woman doesn't instantly trust you or take your word on things? Maybe you should look at your own behavior and ask yourself how you'd like it if someone did that to YOU. What if I insulted your intelligence and lied to you about wanting to be <b>your</b> friend? I don't give out platitudes and make claims I have no intention of living up to. When you're all talk & no action, I can't trust you; if you prove that your talk actually means something, then I'll listen to you but when you haven't proven it?!?!? Please!!<br />
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I'm the woman who told particular dudes she was using them for sex during Phase 1 when she was indeed doing that. It didn't feel right to me to not say something about that. The odd thing was men would usually be okay with it, even saying "can we do it again?" It was weird since I'd be pissed at some guy doing that to me. My goals and focus are different these days. I never led anybody on and if someone didn't feel content just being my friend, I didn't give them false hope. This wasn't every guy since there are some I would have gone out with in my normal life.<br />
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Another major issue that comes up with respect to me (and those of you who aren't super attractive + super smart should take note): I "intimidate" guys because of being a model AND having 2 law licenses among the other things I've done or plan to do in life. You can get rejected for being "too good" since lots of guys are insecure. If you're doing something "great" or "interesting" in life, you very well can end up being alone since no guy has the balls to step to you or stick with you. Mr. Big Stuff might be the only guy I've dealt with who didn't try making me feel like shit for having things or resent me for it; he's got no reason to feel threatened by me or like he's some inferior around me. <br />
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Lots of guys who also shouldn't feel that way apparently haven't owned themselves; the guy I blocked who has issues is a former model & I mean did this for professional pay. He told me he was intimidated around me & I'm like "You're intimidated by little old me?! I was considered ugly in high school & couldn't buy a date; I was this quiet smart kid. A guy <b>chose</b> to leave me." Granted, my ex-husband was not a real prize in the end but that's neither here nor there. I couldn't believe it. He flakes on me for lunch claiming he's not up to "a date." Meanwhile, I'm viewing this as a casual outing with a friend. I don't wear lawyer clothes for dates. <br />
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This guy also hadn't proven himself worthwhile for my consideration in that regard based on his flakiness & not having his life shit together. I felt maybe he could be my friend and might eventually get that shit worked out so I could reconsider but ditching me is not what a friend does, especially on a hot day where I put paper towels in my clothes to do my court assignments and handle my tasks for the day.<br />
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You can also fall into a weird little space where you're considered great at all this stuff but you're not into guys who think they can buy you and treat you like a piece of property so you're on your own to make your way in life with nobody unless you settle & run into the same "you're intimidating" problem. I don't do open relationships and I actually rejected a guy who tried offering me that proposition. I wasn't flattered, I was insulted; I wondered if this guy had mistaken me for a prostitute. Go ahead and do you but don't expect me to be content with being inferior or sharing with other bitches (yeah, I'm quite straight in case you can't tell). Don't expect me to hang around for it either. <br />
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Somebody like me would be some millionaire playboy's nightmare since I can't be bought and won't do disrespect. It feels like some days "God forbid you have self-respect or independent thoughts in your head. God forbid you don't ugly yourself up or dim your light for someone else. God forbid you know your value & own it." This is the message I get from modern dating & guys who don't show me otherwise.<br />
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I feel like we should cut out the pretenses and nonsense. Make things as simple as possible. I'm not going to beg you for your approval & I'm not approaching you in real life. If you're the one approaching me, I certainly shouldn't have to degrade myself or beg you for your approval. I just don't live or die based on such things. To my mind, if I survived life without the guy I loved for years I certainly won't be devastated by some Johnny Come Lately rejecting me for not being a doormat. Why do some of these guys think I will be? That's insulting my intelligence & my emotional strength. This is where my being divorced comes in. It should be code for "been there, done that, don't treat me like some clueless nymph since I'll see right through your bullshit."Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-91393208063900294032019-07-22T16:25:00.000-07:002019-07-22T16:25:07.621-07:00The Surreal Adventures of The Angry Redheaded Lawyer: Consinee Group NY Gala & Fashion Show "Stitched in Time"Through being on a random e-mail list I have no clue how I got onto (the <a href="https://cuswf.org/">China-US Women's Foundation</a>; my only connection to China has been through Mr. Big Stuff, my sort of boyfriend who actually turned down an opportunity to become a male model, being there--he's mentioned in earlier posts in this blog) then sending an RSVP for an event that struck my interest, I ended up getting another opportunity to review a fashion show. I literally sent my RSVP for a Monday and this event was on a Wednesday. Shortly thereafter, I was given an opportunity to write this review. <br />
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So off I went to Cipriani at the Wall Street location.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxMZB3VQznNZFihiu2aiLEJc3nOsp4S3DngHqul6RqIC1XzyZQPScDu5lwF9oC6GMlofghxESmZZQ1NJzcYV1sbXK4mxMmesaV_0eN3URtTFaHVnGqDepHaq5DB_4tNsikyYLyg8IQA10/s1600/Show+Banner.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxMZB3VQznNZFihiu2aiLEJc3nOsp4S3DngHqul6RqIC1XzyZQPScDu5lwF9oC6GMlofghxESmZZQ1NJzcYV1sbXK4mxMmesaV_0eN3URtTFaHVnGqDepHaq5DB_4tNsikyYLyg8IQA10/s320/Show+Banner.jpeg" width="320" height="240" data-original-width="1600" data-original-height="1200" /></a></div><br />
For those of you who've never been to Cipirani, I have to insist you go to at least one event there if you want to call yourself upscale or cultured. From the outside, Cipriani Wall Street looks like a regular ordinary building on Wall Street. When you walk inside, it's a very different experience. I would describe going in as a magical experience. You are literally transformed into a space with high columns, architecture and far from the venues I've set foot in for previous fashion shows either as a guest or a model. <br />
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Having been to Cipriani for one other event in my life (as the guest of another attorney with political office and presidency in a local organization), I was prepared for the grandness of this space. Dress appropriately if you're going to be here; this isn't a jeans and sneakers style place.<br />
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As this was a fashion show/gala event, I saw people wearing all kinds of great fashionable outfits and made sure to live up to that myself while also staying comfortable for hot weather and the impending rain storm predicted for later in the evening. I wore a dress I've owned since the 90s that I recently got altered to fit me properly (I may be one of the only people who got older and is now thinner than she was in high school; my alternations projects involve getting clothes taken in so they fit me properly). It was also fingertip length and a bright, shiny red while I did my hair in a side ponytail to manage icky sweat effects from hair on my shoulders/back. Unlike many places in NYC, Cipriani has air conditioning. I actually got cold at times and needed to grab my coverup from my purse!! The cocktail period before the show had some good food, including the type of black caviar that I like as part of an appetizer.<br />
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Needless to say if you're going to do a fashion show & it's in your budget, book Cipriani. This is even more true if you want good food and for your guests to have a first class experience. <br />
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The stage setup for the show definitely built anticipation. It was a series of steps coming from nearly the top of the ceiling to the floor. I wondered if the models were going to be walking from the very top of this step creation and thought "that's daring."<br />
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When I saw the models walk out, I noticed they definitely looked like the runway types you typically see though I was pleased to see a woman who appears to be a real redhead among the ranks. If you've been to a lot of fashion shows, you know that real redheads on the runway are few and far between. I've usually been the only redhead in shows I did; you definitely stand out and it's not a look I think is appreciated or regarded all that much based on shows I've seen and castings I participated in. In fact, I find calls of "promoting diversity" hollow & contradictory when no one who looks like me is represented while everybody else IS represented (and they were though I had to go with the best pictures & didn't get the best shots of every single model I saw). Doesn't she look great?<br />
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<a href="http://en.consinee.com.cn/">Consinee Group</a> is a company based in China. They specialize in cashmere creations and have a deep commitment to being green in their manufacturing process and in the creation of their material. They also have an international presence, engage in philanthropic efforts to help the herders who provide the animals who create the material to make the cashmere along with the children of those herders and are dedicated to environmental causes. In fact, they even have a corporate song!!<br />
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Designed by Steven Oo, these pics represent only some of the fashions featured in this show. The fashions covered a variety of colors, designs and looks. None of the models stopped to pose during the walk and I have no idea if they did photographs with the photographers before or after the show but I captured these while sitting in the press section. I hope they did get some good pictures, as models seek these out for their portfolios and I got nothing but a professional vibe when I saw this show. I only noticed one gap during the walk and wasn't sure if this was a pause for a second segment or if this was the end of the show; the models were very good about maintaining proper distance and not bunching up on each other. Despite having to traverse some stairs for this walk (none at the very tippy top of the stage but some that were more standard than you'd think of for an average stage), no one fell or looked like they were going to trip. Managing that, especially in heels, is much harder than it looks.<br />
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The show's theme was "Stitched in Time." If the theme is meant to indicate that the fashions shown are timeless, then the theme was extremely descriptive since I would consider that a true statement. I would further describe what I saw as unique twists on preppy and business attire (two areas you wouldn't typically think of as being known for having a stylish, modern aesthetic) and looks that were both sexy and tasteful.<br />
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As you'll see, there's a look here for everyone and this doesn't even cover the full spectrum of looks represented in this show. Much of the attire consisted of items you could absolutely wear on the street and look great in without looking completely out of place or having it be too impractical to wear in real life. Would you ever associate the white outfit above with the word "cashmere"? I also noticed some shoe changes during the show, which I imagine was not an easy feat to pull off but the models made it happen.<br />
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Now I'd probably never get away with wearing it to court but I'm very partial to the striped suit above & feel if I had a suit like that I would definitely look like a kick ass entertainment attorney. It reflects a sense of style (which you almost never see in business attire among female attorneys; there's a stereotype that we are "unstylish").<br />
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This dress was my absolute favorite garment of the show. I'm glad I got a good shot of it. Since we know redheads rock green and I rock forest green without a doubt, you can kind of see why I'd consider this outfit a top pick for myself. I actually went to the website to see if they sell the garments directly.<br />
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The final walk did not consist of the models clapping but this was the most professional and put together fashion show I've seen. If there was backstage craziness and last minute issues (which anyone in fashion knows are inevitable no matter what type of fashion show you're doing), no one brought it to the stage or made it the audience's problem.<br />
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After the show was a dinner that was quite filling and led to me possibly making a new friendship with a fellow blogger who's also reviewing this show for her blog, Tablespoons & Teaspoons (I tried to find a link but no such luck). I also met a young woman reviewing this show for <a href="https://honeysucklemag.com/">Honeysuckle magazine</a>. She told me that was going to be her first review and I tried to provide my own insight as someone who'd done reviews and modeling before.<br />
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The show director Christina Neault, executive producers Claire Lin & Yuhan Liu, project managers Channie Chang (also Consinee's Director of Sales & Marketing), Mary Xu, Sherry Xue and the Consinee Group Chairman + CEO Boris Xue (among the many individuals involved in this event) showcased a company representing the best of China & should be very proud of their work. Mr. Xue said this was the second show Consinee has done in NYC at Cipriani and a third show is already being planned for July 2020.<br />
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I also received a gift bag which included a seamless cashmere garment from Consinee. Mine was a mock turtleneck and trying it on, it might be the most comfortable and warm top I've ever worn that could also be worn if I want to look sexy without freezing too death. I can't wait to try it out when fall/winter hit. <br />
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Based on this actual experience with the brand, I would love to see if they have a store with garments or could make some of the looks I saw in the show (though budget and closet space might limit me somewhat, they may not be issues for some of you).<br />
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Here's to the next fashion show from Consinee in 2020.Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-87400937060506508282019-04-19T19:53:00.001-07:002019-04-19T19:53:20.543-07:005 Years Later: What Have We Learned?Lately, I've been a somewhat reflective mood. March 1st was literally 5 years to the day when life as I knew it in NYC changed permanently. What shall we call it? The day my ex-husband decided 100% I had no human worth or the day I fled for my mental sanity? Well, whatever you call it a lot of things have changed & I keep marveling at how things have turned around.<br />
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For one thing, I've figured out exactly how to structure my entertainment career. I had exclusive representation then realized it wasn't for me. Maybe it was just the manager I had but I felt like there was too much controlling nonsense going on and I'm not the type who needs Superman to swoop in and save her. A manager contact I actually know said I likely don't need a manager, just a good agent. It felt like where every attorney clamors to get the big law firm job, you get the big law firm job then you do it & realize it's not what you had in mind. In my case, I felt like I was being repressed and having my sense of self-sufficiency taken away. I felt like I was being forced into a mold that didn't fit who I am & I don't want to do a career based around what I'm not. I want a representative who accepts and likes who I am. Somebody who's not going to tell me to hide my film company experience or my law licenses or my producing abilities or get attitude because I'm not some idiot. Someone who's not going to try horning in on things I did by myself or expecting me to placate the insecure assholes who want me to dim my light so they feel better about themselves. I realized I'd rather have my own film production company and create my own content but you need money to do that properly. You'll make far more money doing legal work than you will waiting tables. Recent conversations with sorority sisters who also work in decision making parts of larger companies in the business also made me feel better about this choice since they agreed that I shouldn't have to hide my legal background or my film company experience on my own website and personal social media pages. I'm even getting that creative spark back to start doing writing again & have ideas on what I see going on that nobody is addressing or speaking my voice on. A suggestion to do standup is also something I'm giving real thought to and wondering if I can get receipts if I'm charged for open mic so I can deduct those as business expenses.<br />
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I've also been able to afford things I wanted to get and been able to feel more whole again. Getting clothes that were too big for me altered (still working on that). Got renter's insurance, set up an IRA again, got savings accounts, did LASIK and my cosmetic dental work and even got DVDs I didn't get in the big DVD split. Life feels less like deprivation to me now. I even got a new official legal bag and a baseball style jacket and a short sleeved hoodie (things I'd wanted for years & couldn't find). Since my legal hustle has improved and I've made better entertainment contacts, things feel like they're looking up. I've been going to yoga when I can, have a kitty cat around who likes me (not quite like having my own but she is a lot like one of my old kitties in her own way; I'm probably too busy to keep one at this point anyway), have had friends and FWBs who take me out on occasion, fixed problems in my room and living situation I thought would never happen, etc. There's always going to be room for improvement but it feels like many of the problems I've had to deal with aren't impossible to overcome. I even have far better looking in terms of romantic prospects though I'm holding out for Mr. Big Stuff at this point since nobody's come close to surpassing him and I don't think he'd have bothered apologizing to me before if he didn't care at all. He seems a lot like Captain Horndog in the sense that no matter what I do or how hard I push him away, he's just not going to let me push him out of the ring that is my life. I don't feel like a lot of people have that kind of spirit and temerity to deal with the redhead even if she's told you to fuck off, leave her alone, that sort of thing. Part of me feels like maybe he won't ambush me with saying he's going to take up with some other bitch; I know I couldn't do the "let's be friends" thing since I'd really feel resentful of not being given a true shot and like I meant absolutely nothing, <br />
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I've been contrasting the new normal with how things were 5 years ago. I still remember it but it's very surreal to me now. I had no means to be independent, I was living in the Scarface mansion, this might have been when I met this really cute guy at an event and he was wowed by me being able to drive a pickup truck after I'd done that out of mere necessity (getting the cat who lived there his cat food since no one else was around to get it and there was no other vehicle I could use for that purpose), I was full on in Phase One of the divorce & had no idea if I was going to be around after October 13th of that year. Months were endless for me, I felt like a ghost and I was fighting to keep things that were just slipping away and vanishing. It also felt like I'd just woken up from a coma when I went to the Scarface mansion & everything had changed. <br />
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The perfect symbol of my life is the Cadbury Chocolate Creme Egg.<br />
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When my whole "Sex & the City" lifestyle first started, I was eating tons of those. I was staying in the East Village and saw them in the nearby CVS on sale. It was "Chocolate!!! Must get!" Those were something I was able to get and having them helped my emotional state a lot. It's literally super chocolate, a must for the chocolate fiend. Anytime I saw them on the cheap, I bought at least 3 of them. They also got me through 2015 when I was dealing with being on public assistance. I hadn't really had them so much before that whole situation happened.<br />
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This year, I go to find those and can't find them to save my life. I look online and no such luck. I can't even figure out what happened. Did they get discontinued? Were they recalled? Why can't you find them? Anything else just pales by comparison. It's made me annoyed but it's also felt like the end of an era, the era of me feeling cheated and wronged from what happened to me. Sometime last year it just felt irrelevant but now since I've been able to do for myself more and get things I've needed for ages but hadn't been able to do in years past, it feels like the scales have balanced out and I don't have to feel cheated and deprived anymore. I also feel like I've survived the worst and anything else that comes my way is far easier to deal with. How can you possibly tell someone who's survived the things I have that she needs to be concerned about what the rest of the world thinks of her or that she's got to cater to someone else's self-esteem problems? On what universe would that ever make sense? I also keep hearing and reading about situations where people followed their hearts, charted their own paths and it led to success. I'm just wondering when the heck I'm getting MY due on such things. As I said, there's still room for improvement though things are far better than they were 5 years ago.Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-535631368064334837.post-78464809310746429992019-03-01T20:45:00.001-08:002019-03-01T20:45:22.352-08:00Charlotte York, Get the Heck Out of NYC....Captain Obvious?? Maybe. But if you have ANY shred of Charlotte York in you, you have no business living in Manhattan or dating there if you want to find a Prince Charming sort of guy. Let's establish a few things first:<br />
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You may be asking "Who's Charlotte York?" For those of you not old enough to remember the show or who never saw it because you're a straight guy, Charlotte York is a character from the HBO show "Sex & the City" of the late 90s/early 00s. Charlotte was the "Sex & the City" posse member who was the least slutty. Actually, Charlotte wasn't really slutty at all. She was this idealist with high hopes of meeting the man of her dreams and getting married. Charlotte had some idealist notions and could easily have been a Southern belle if she'd grown up in the South + had even a Southern inflection. Of the 4 stars, Charlotte was the most traditional. Charlotte was the woman who found herself in situations the other characters were less phased by and really felt "ick" about them but managed not to be a 24/7 judgmental prick. I like to think she was the romantic one. Most women know a Charlotte York or have some Charlotte York in them; it's part of our culture and the "happily ever after" of fairy tale romance.<br />
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Now why do I say "don't bother dating in NYC if you've got any Charlotte York in you"? Here goes:<br />
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1. Most of us want to commit to a guy with ambition and a career path. Those guys are either busy toiling in offices, traveling all over the place or are complete douchebags who view women as nothing more than walking sex robots (see finance bros for one such archetype).<br />
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2. If those guys are in town & meeting our looks standards, they are usually married/in a relationship or so tired from working to afford housing/food/other stuff in NYC that costs far more than elsewhere that they aren't in the mood if they actually get any quality of life hours. One friend familiar with this had to explain "coke dick" to me, a drug some people take to stay awake for those long hours of work.<br />
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3. NYC is not a place for those who aren't ambitious. Problem is, if you're not a retired person or don't want to date guys old enough to be your father then you are either stuck with dudes who are never around or unemployed bums who are always around. Or you get the resentful guys who aren't doing as well as you on career & will eventually take it out on you if you get successful or have success in some fashion.<br />
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I'm here not even able to find a dedicated FWB meeting my standards of living nearby, actually being in town at least 8 months out of the year, having or finding the time to meet me at least once a week, being my equal on the looks & intelligence scales and treating me as a lady instead of some sex robot. Since the painfulness of my divorce, I've gone more to my old self. <br />
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My old self was not a prude but it wasn't completely devoid of standards either. It's interesting I met Mr. Big Stuff when I was in Phase 1 of the divorce; if he'd met me as my normal self, not only would I have thought he didn't legitimately like me if he'd approached me but I might have been too conservative for him. I'm not in the best mood with him right now since he asked me about doing something that while it was reasonable terms, was something this "nice girl" just can't get behind and it made her wonder how he's seeing her. I wouldn't care to have some guy view me as a prostitute he has his way with then throws away like garbage. Even a self-confessed wannabe Charlie Sheen like Captain Horndog (at least if Charlie Sheen was sober) didn't throw me away like garbage, maybe because I made him promise not to have anything of that nature happening affect our longtime friendship & he might actually be scared of me (he's told me he was before). The scariest was hearing guys I met in Phase 1 of my divorce tell me they never thought I was a slut or easy even though I was trying very hard to wash away the memory of my ex-husband.<br />
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As for my ex-husband, I didn't meet him while living in NYC. I met him when I was living in CT & he was living in Long Island. We married when I was living in CT and he moved into my apartment, where we lived together for a time then moved to NYC together (Queens, to be precise). He was not a fan of Manhattan & said he wanted to live in Queens where his "people" were. If he's dating to this day, I'm certain he's not dating some trust funder in Manhattan; I'd question that woman's sanity & standards.<br />
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The upside of dating post-divorce is that I have gotten to be involved with much hotter guys than I was the first time I was single. Lately when I went places and noticed some hot guy, that hot guy ended up talking to me. I met such a guy at this speed dating event on my birthday proper after I'd turned in my paper for matches (he'd not talked to me during the event) but he approached me after the event. Having the Bipolar Fraud from a couple years ago approach me was also a great ego boost; my psyche is being healed with guys I consider cute approaching me. It's brought them down to earth & given me more confidence to own my looks, which is a very good thing in my opinion since we should all own who we are vs. being shamed into dulling our light for others.<br />
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The problem is none of the hotties with good jobs seem to be available physically or emotionally in the long term. This would be unacceptable to the Charlotte Yorks of the world. I'm thinking it's more highlighted in a big city but it's like "You can't even get a dedicated FWB. What the HELL is this?!?!?" Maybe if somebody convinced me I wasn't just going to be dumped again or lied to once again, I could consider marriage after a lot of trust being established and built but I'm just not there with anybody at this point. I feel like that's never going to happen and I'm done with being with someone just because I'm flattered they paid attention to me or wanted ANY attention vs. the right kind of attention.<br />
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I'm not sure any sane, straight men fitting my level of looks or intelligence have any Charlotte York in them. I've seen they're not all wannabe Charlie Sheen but I can't deal with wimps either. The only guy I've met who might have that lives further into New Jersey and is super busy (but not too busy as he's one of my great fans & champions).Film Co. Lawyerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11995928421833366660noreply@blogger.com0