Thursday, April 28, 2011

The Auntie Wrath Has Been Triggered

So I learn yesterday that my nephew, the sweetest, cutest 7 year old I know, is the victim of some school bullies. I did a post covering this issue before & like the typical bullying story, the school personnel are being ignorant chuckleheads who apparently want to become victims of gunshots when a bullied kid finally snaps and engages in his/her own little Columbine.

I already have a zero tolerance policy on bullying & at least my sister did the right thing by telling him not to let any little brat push him down without giving the little prick what for. I'll be teaching this kid some self-defense tactics when I'm down there if he needs it. Hell, I lived bullying more than my sister so if anyone's the authority on it, I have to be right up there. My husband also faced serious bullying & could be of help. My sister constantly remarks that living with him is like living with me all over again & that he's also a shy kid so who better to address it?

That leads to another thought: why is it that shy people are almost never appreciated for who they are? Why do we have to cater to the agenda and prejudice of the social butterflies of the world? Even the Queens County Bar Association did this. I can tell you from my sorority recruiting days that you'd never get away with passing the buck like this if you didn't make some shy potential member feel welcome in your house. Not in my chapter, at least where diversity of thought and personality were praised just as much as any in skin color or ethnicity.

Today, I don't consider myself outgoing though I can network like a fiend. I'm just someone who's passionate, knows the game & tries to focus on creating genuine relationships with others. I don't contribute to conversations unless I have something useful to say & I need time to warm up to a social setting where I don't know anyone. That or you can start talking to me. After that, I'll respond.

These school admins better get their act together. The parents of these little brats better start handing out discipline before I roll into town or, oh boy. One of my exes once told me I had the capacity to be like Livia Soprano; people don't tell you that if you're some docile wimp that the world at large can walk on.

I will happily remind them of the lawsuit potential, about Columbine and inform my nephew that he'll be doing far better than these assholes if he keeps his eyes on the prize & realizes that there's a great big world far away from the redneck enclave he's being forced to live in. The jockos will just become Al Bundy anyway. My detractors also have a way of suffering misfortune after getting on my bad side though I had no personal hand in it. Call it karma or turnabout. I have the last laugh anyway since I'm getting to live my dreams and I'll bet 99% of them aren't.

If he wanted to go to boarding school & I had the money, I'd make it happen for him in a second because God knows I wanted to do that at his age. If you'd offered me that as a kid, you wouldn't have had to ask me twice. A place where you can create your own identity & be away from your dysfunctional family while learning truly useful lessons? Hell yeah!

So hopefully, I'll get to impart some of my knowledge & world savvy onto him so he doesn't suffer the emotional shit I and others had to.

If you're a bullied person or know someone who is, a little tip. Your detractors are nothing & not worth impressing.

They are shitheads, pricks, scumbags, whatever insult you have to call them to put them back in the gutter where they belong. They aren't better than you and if they dare to belittle you, they aren't even as good as you. They are nothing, end of story.

If you belittle others, you aren't special. Your shit smells just as bad as everyone else's (probably worse, in fact) and you bleed, die, get sick and eat like anyone else. Get over yourself if you believe otherwise.

When I stopped worrying about what people thought of me, I had a much better life complete with self-esteem. I think eventually, the popular kids & so forth respected me because I respected myself. That realization didn't kick in until very late in high school and it didn't really hit until I was doing stage work and people applauded for me. No one booed or heckled me when I sang or acted; I even got compliments and standing ovations. People mess w/you, remember these sage words from The Angry Redheaded Lawyer: fuck 'em.

That philosophy is probably why I'd never work in a mega-law firm. I've just long evolved from the 7th grade clique shit mentality (which I call it b/c I had to face the worst bullying when I was in 7th grade & from the smart girls clique).

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Arresting Someone for Trying to Better Their Kids' Lives? Piss Off!

There are a few stories I've seen that have my dander up (and I really should update this blog more but between a steady paying temp job, paid writing work & other responsibilities, my schedule has been a little crazy lately) but this one takes the cake. It also hits a personal note for me since I was a smart kid and education was huge in my household. When I was little, my father insisted that we both go to college. There was no negotiation on that point. Neither of my parents went, though my mom actually didn't want to aside from cost issues. Plus, in those days college was akin to a graduate level degree today.

This story is also personal to me since I lived in CT at one time and know the stories about how bad Bridgeport is. I also spent a fair amount of time going to the ferry.

The powers that be in Norwalk should be ashamed of themselves. Where is their outrage for the conditions in the Bridgeport schools? Why should this woman's son be forced to get a substandard education because of who he was born to? Do you think he asked to live in a poor community? What parent wouldn't do this for their kids? If mine were in this woman's shoes, you'd better believe she would.

Should I have been denied admission to AP level classes because of where I went to school? Don't people living in poverty have enough problems to deal with without being forced into a substandard school system to get an inferior education that won't do shit for them in life? Is it any wonder the dropout rates are so high & kids in those areas turn to a life of crime, living on welfare, or whatever else they have to in order to survive?

They'll never get admitted to good schools when they have no foundation or real education to speak of. I feel bad for the kids at my school who were taking regular level classes. You did not learn squat in them, largely because the troublemakers were put there but that's another story.

That is yet another reason I support homeschooling but what if you can't afford it because you are a parent who has to work or there is no local homeschooling teacher to go to who will not cost a fortune?

How about instead of punishing this woman for trying to do right by her kids we go after the real issue, which is education funding and equality for everyone in that regard? I, in particular, don't think the quality of your education should be based on accident of birth.

Want to run that "pull yourself up by your boostraps" argument to me again? You're just starting to sound like a bigger moron the more you use it. Personal motivation can only take you so far.

If you ask me, this woman should be celebrated as an example of a great, dedicated parent giving 100% to her children. That's more than you can say for some of these lazy asshole rich folk who refuse to admit their little precious is capable of wrongdoing and threaten to sue when the school doesn't put up with their crap or a teacher "hurts their little feelings." I'd like to see how involved the parents in this school district are in their kids' lives and what the teachers think of them. I'm sure we'd find some deadbeats in the bunch who refuse to be PARENTS and whose children are wasted in this "good" school system.

How's about an exchange system or an education system like in Europe where smart kids with potential get to advance and are not held back because their parents don't have a million bucks? You call it socialism? Well, I call forcing smart kids to be on the same level as the slowest kids & never letting them move forward an act of socialism. How do you like that?

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Some Food for Thought & Yes, Attorneys CAN Be Pervs

This morning, I went to the dermatologist. Now I don't like reporting on my life exploits b/c usually they're not all that interesting. Plus, I really don't like stalking or stalkers whether they're mine or someone else's. Had some bad experiences with that & I'm not even famous.

Anyhow, the dermatologist asked me if I had experienced any recent stress. I talked a bit about my career experiences & she said that you can see the effects of stress on your skin as well as other places.

So in light of that, I have to mention a few articles I have bookmarked & prove that attorneys are indeed NOT exempt from being perverts. More on that shortly, though.

First off, this article on career lessons from the recession. They missed one important lesson: don't count on anyone else to do anything for you! Maybe that's also a good life lesson but it's been my experience that you shouldn't expect that you'll still have a job at someone else's company tomorrow or that a networking contact will help you. Be the steward of your own life & if you don't count on others, you'll appreciate them even more when they go out of their way for you. I never do things for others for any reason other than sheer kindness or to help, but I do know industry protocol in my field dictates that you put yourself at serious risk if you don't reciprocate, especially if it's someone who could really screw you now or later.

Second, there's no way in Hell I'd go back 10 years on a resume like this article advises. For one thing, I was in college 10 years ago. I had about 13 jobs when I was applying to the CT bar to become an attorney. I had to contact all my past employers so they could tell the bar examining committee about me. NY, mercifully, only asked for past legal employers (which was about 3).

If I included all my jobs from the past 10 years, you wouldn't have a resume. You would have a tome! At least I've never been fired from a job; I've just lost them due to lack of work, scam artistry & intolerable working conditions not caused by me. My rule of thumb is to only list legitimate jobs I've had since becoming an attorney & mentioning things I did before only if it was relevant to a specific job I'd applied for. A museum might care that I worked at the campus museum for 3 years on work study but no one in the legal field or entertainment world would base a hiring decision on that fact. For the record, that is an actual job I had in the past 10 years. No employer I know of has asked to see more than my past 3-4 jobs, certainly not more than 5 years.

Want the past 10 years from me? Prepare for a tome. You don't want to hear about my retail work considering I'm an attorney & I think it's highly irrelevant since my earlier job skills are largely integrated into things I've done more currently. I'm never returning to retail so how does it help you to hear that I did it if you're considering me for a job outside that industry?

Not to beat a dead horse here but I also saw this article & have some thoughts. If you've been reading this blog, you already know my views on the use of social media & how I think employers ought to be looking at it. That lawsuit I mentioned is likely a foreshadowing of what's to come when someone eventually sues on such matters.

Anyhow, I can sum up most people's career advice on such matters in one sentence: Have a bland, vanilla profile & never be controversial.

Thank God I get to speak my mind. How do the people working for Nazis & Stalinists handle it? Someone does something shitty to me, you're damn straight I'll say something. I have a public duty to warn people about that kind of thing, especially as an attorney. Also you know these same people will try buddying up to me later on & I'll need a record to make absolutely certain I know why they're on my blacklist.

Now, to explain attorneys being pervs. Saw this Craig's List ad today:

Hostesses (topless/nude) for small sports party (Upper West Side)
Date: 2011-04-21, 12:24PM EDT
Reply to: [Errors when replying to ads?]

Hi we are a group of friends having a small party (10 -12 guys) next week that is sports related. We are looking for 2 hostesses to help serve drinks and food and generally add to the fun while we are glued to the tv. And since this is craigslist, we are hoping that the hostesses would be topless or nude. We are a bunch of otherwise boring lawyers so this isnt a gropefest. We are well-intentioned , respectful guys who just want to have a little fun. We have done this a few times in the past and its been a blast. This should be about 4 hours and we will guarantee $200 each for that period amd $50/hr each thereafter. And in the past the fellas have also tipped the women as well. This is a good opportunity to make some easy money and have food and drinks as well in a fun environment. If interested, please reply with a bit about yourself and a contact number and we'll call and arrange to meet so you beforehand so you can see this is a good situation.

* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
* Compensation: $50/hr (4 hours guaranteed) plus tip

PostingID: 2338632406

I had to respond to this convoluted logic that attorneys are never capable of being filthy perverts. If you believe this convoluted logic, you don't actually know many attorneys or you're full of crap. Why do I say this?

For one thing, I've gotten hit on by attorneys at networking events. One actually invited me out for a drink after I was attending this job fair I didn't really need to attend since I'd already secured a legal client by the time it happened. I was just there for freebies like food, mints, etc. No attorney who's hit on me ever truly offended me since I don't offend easily but if one did, boy would he ever know it!

Let's also consider the experiences of female law firm associates and others who have been the victims of workplace sexual harassment & propositioning. You'd think they worked in the entertainment industry & were subject to the casting couch with some of the tales I've read. It's a huge reason I'd never bother working in some big law firm; if I wanted that kind of harassment, I could just become a stripper & make more money + have some work/life balance to boot.

Attorney doesn't always = upstanding person. There are some who take their ethical obligations seriously (I hope it's a large number) but there are those who don't. Some are despicable enough to where you'd be safer around a crazy homeless person who mutters. Read some stories about disbarred attorneys & law firm working environments. Even document review isn't immune from these scumbags so it's not just the attorneys pulling in $500K+ a year.

I also reminded the author of this ad that actress doesn't = slut. I think many actresses I know would be pissed if you called them that or thought they'd do something like this just b/c they are actresses.

Hope that's enough education to make you realize that being an attorney doesn't make you an upstanding, moral citizen who'd never harass, grope or bother a topless chick. If you were a scumbag before, being an attorney won't magically change you into an upstanding citizen.

Maybe this guy should just go to a strip club if he wants topless waitresses and nude women or hire a stripper that makes house calls. Just my take on it.

Monday, April 18, 2011

Thanks for Inspiring a Post, Something Positive!

So, some good life news: I'm starting a temporary day job that will offer steady pay but still permit me to get decent parking spaces & not have to wake up with the chickens. Flexible hours & low stress are beautiful things, particularly when it's not YOUR business.

Just happened upon the latest Something Positive this morning. See an earlier post about me & my husband meeting the creator of this web comic at Wild Pig Con.

If you read his news item, he chooses not to share his views on assisted suicide. However, I realized I haven't shared mine & being as I'm not concerned w/the mutterings of the PC police I figure it's another thing I can rant on since I certainly have an opinion on it.

My thoughts on this topic are much like my views on abortion: if you haven't lived it, then you really have no right to comment. Another topic far too entwined with religion for everyone's own good.

I know what the law is but if I had my way, we would change that. I think it should be a private matter & a private decision between doctors, the dying patient and relevant family members (not Cousin Mabel, the fundamentalist busybody who protests at abortion clinics but children, parents, those who might be directly impacted by the person's death in a serious way). That way, if someone chose assisted suicide, it could be done humanely and with a minimal amount of mess, trauma, etc. At least doctors don't pull out guns & shoot the patient.

I don't think there's a one size fits all solution but if there is zero hope that I could recover (incurable ailment) or live a normal, functional existence, I would not want to be kept on life support for 20 years. I told my mother that if she had me end up like Terri Schiavo & fought w/my spouse over it, I would haunt her for eternity. I think most of us want to live but who knows how you'd feel if you were in chronic pain, couldn't do anything most people do now & had no quality of life at all? I certainly wouldn't want to spend my time on Earth not being able to have any kind of enjoyment.

Perhaps it helps to explain that when I hear "God is everywhere," I take that literally. I take that to mean God sees your circumstances, hears your thoughts, and understands human motivation or that you may not be in your right mind when you "sin." The God I believe in doesn't condemn & damn you to Hell with no opportunity to explain yourself. Otherwise, God's not everywhere or your conception of God is a complete & total dick. That's not MY conception of God, thanks.

I also feel like the anti crowd is a bit selfish. They don't really care about the sick person's happiness or quality of life; they just care about their own feelings if not political posturing, appeasing religious groups (including their own churches), getting benefits from the person being "alive", etc.

I can't really say what I'd do since I've not been there & I certainly wouldn't run around judging someone if they consider it or actually do it. Try being in that person's shoes before shooting off your mouth!

Perhaps if more people had empathy for others, we'd have fewer jerks causing problems and butting into everyone else's private business.

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Reasonable or Another Example of Entitlement Behavior?

So I saw this Craig's List ad today:

Seeking part time attorney's position with daycare allowance (NYC)
Date: 2011-04-16, 2:09PM EDT
Reply to: [Errors when replying to ads?]

I am a 33 year old married female attorney with a one year old daughter who would need to come with me to any office I work at. I had had this arrangement at my previous office however, my former boss passed away last year. She was not a bother and I took care of her myself throughout appearances and even during depositions!.....I would additionally request that any employer reading this ad keep an open mind and that things are not nearly as difficult as they may appear to be. I should know, I was living this scenario personally!

I have been admitted to the NYS bar for the past 8 years; have also been admitted to all Four District Courts, the 2nd Circuit and the United States Supreme Court. I have performed various levels of trial, and and covered numerous conferences on trips/slips and falls, auto accidents, construction accidents, medical malpractice, and the like. I have jury picked in 4 out of 5 boroughs, and have additionally performed several bench trials.

I can work from the most basic pleading complete through depositions, subpoenas and trial preparation. As I know this market is not this best, at a FULL time position I would request 60K but for approximately 40 hours a week I am herein requesting 50K. I have references and of course a CV upon any request! I am looking to work in the Manhattan/Bronx/Downtown Brooklyn/or LIC areas in particular.


* Location: NYC
* Telecommuting is ok.
* This is a part-time job.
* Principals only. Recruiters, please don't contact this job poster.
* Please, no phone calls about this job!
* Please do not contact job poster about other services, products or commercial interests.

PostingID: 2329006269

We're not simply talking about some payment for a maid or daycare center or time to drop a child off; this person is making demands to bring a 1 year old to the office. A few facts may need mention.

1. The legal field is notoriously unfriendly to small children. There are client meetings, court dates, depositions that are transcribed by people who are paid huge hourly amounts, etc. You have demanding bosses making you work very long hours. Part-time in law land is full-time everywhere else.

2. Many law offices are in buildings where other professionals have offices. Unless you are a very big, rich firm you will not have multiple floors or even one floor that is all yours.

3. If you are surrounded by other working people, there are inevitable noise complaints. Everyone is expected to keep noise to a minimum and screaming would be noticed.

See, where this seems a tad unrealistic & would rub me the wrong way as an employer? I don't know you. I don't know what type of parent you are or anything about your work ethic.

I presume this other boss may have worked with this woman for years and knew if she was capable of doing the job, how her parenting skills are, if she was a reliable worker, demanded childfree employees to accommodate her, etc.

Now I think it would be great if employers provided on-site daycare for employees or at least a space for this small kid that would not mean leaving her in the office during client meetings or expecting the whole office to play babysitter while this mother is in court. If she takes this baby to court, I have to wonder what the judge & court personnel say. Maybe this kid's a local celebrity but for all I know, it could piss off some judge who's trying to dispose of cases to hear a screaming baby in his/her courtroom. If there's anything you don't do, it's make a judge mad at you when you have to go before him/her in court.

But that's not the world we live in. Most law firms won't even give you flexibility in hours like the one I worked at where parents could leave at 4 so they could pick up their kids from school. My nephew is almost a year old & I can't see my sister demanding some employer to let her bring him to work. I've also never met a baby that was silent through a whole work day or never gets grumpy, cranky, bored, etc. without letting you know it by screaming bloody murder.

I say if you want to be a lawyer & bring your child to work, you should consider becoming a solo so you can work at home unless you can pay for a quality daycare center, leave your child with a babysitter or find a workplace that has an on-site daycare center. Little kids do not belong in an office setting (unless maybe your product is marketed to them & there are no confidentiality laws involved) and I think have more potential to be a hassle than a dog or a cat. Animals will at least kill insects, attack intruders, warn you of gas leaks and do other things little kids won't.

Not to mention how the child would feel. Grown ups wouldn't even want to be in a law office for 8 hours, forget 10 or 12 per day if they weren't getting paid for it. Doing it to a small child may as well be child abuse. Law offices don't have toys, games, books or other age appropriate fare for 1 year olds.

Oh, and fairness to co-workers anyone? Some of us don't want to be pestered about having kids or demanded to worship at the altar of your child. We also don't want to hear about the details of little Johnny's diaper mess or his feeding schedule. How does anyone know you aren't the type of mother childfree people hate (basically, those who expect everyone to fawn all over their kid or to get a metal of honor for breeding)? Not to mention seeing a baby brings out the evangelizing from parents to childfree women on the Church of Baby.

The co-workers probably won't get to say "I don't want that child here!" and get their wish. They could be forced to quit (or hostile work environment if they're being harangued daily about their breeding plans) and then the firm loses talented people who may have been there for years because of one person who can't be bothered with lining up daycare services.

Honestly, this ad just rubs me the wrong way as an employer & based on what I know about the legal field. I don't think most firms would accommodate this & I would never expect an office where no one knew me to do that for me.

Those looking for jobs: how would you feel if an employer told you after hiring you for a job that they had little kids in the office on a daily basis that you'd have to work around? I'd personally be pissed since I don't have kids for a reason & unless the child is related to me or I'm being paid for it, I'm not going to be a babysitter or take on motherly tasks. I would also wonder how much real work got done there & what the landlord, others working around the office, etc. thought of it. Based on this woman's demands, you can't help but wonder if she'd be the type of parent to foist child care duties onto co-workers.

Just goes back to the saying "You breed 'em, you feed 'em." Don't inflict your lifestyle choices on everyone else; be an adult & handle your own responsibilities.

Friday, April 15, 2011

General Musings Part 19

This one may end up a little longer than normal because I have some serious rants for some of it. Some could make up their own blog posts in an of themselves but I'll see what I can do to reserve some of it for separate posts.

* First off, I don't know if Betty White actually said this or not but if she did "brava." Some famous people are spoiled assholes who don't appreciate that A) most people don't make in a year what they make per movie & some make less per year than they make per TV episode, B) lots of people would trade places with them in a second & C) the criminal justice system is completely biased in favor of celebrities.

Do you think a regular person would get the same punishments, second changes, etc. as Lindsay Lohan has for doing precisely what she's done? I don't think so.

Any famous person who appreciates those facts and finds "bad behavior" reprehensible should be praised. That's a person who appreciates the admiration of the common people & presumably is in touch with them.

Yes, celebrities have to go through all sorts of stuff & I can understand why drug and alcohol addiction are so rampant in the industry but if you're going to do that stuff, not get treatment then continue to break the law and flout your superiority to others, I have zero sympathy for you. In fact, your total failure will be even more glorious to the common person. Want people to root for your success or throw parties after your death because they hate you?

* This is just funny. It makes you want to create your own town & come up with fun street names.

I was contemplating variations of the "Baby on Board" sign since I happened to see one as we were driving yesterday. I came up with "Satanist on Board" and "Flirty Homosexuals on Board." If I had one of those signs, I'd want something clever & interesting like those that just happened to be true for our situation; not sure what that would be for us. "Crazy People on Board" is just too easy.

* Oh, and do me a favor. Let's just shut up about how gay marriage is immoral and that other crap, all right? Stop persecuting gay couples & grant gay marriage in all 50 states already! Gay people are absolutely right about the fact that they're treated like second class citizens. Consider this.

Want a theocracy? Claim your own island & take all the nutbags of your faith with you. When I say "nutbags," I'm referring to people who have zero logical reasoning skills, make no effort to live in modern society and think they are Lord & Master (or Lady & Mistress) of everyone else's lives. The people who protest abortion but never adopt unwanted kids or try to reform the foster care system while also indulging doctors who demand all childfree women to breed before getting voluntary sterilization.

Better yet, move to an existing theocracy. Leave the rest of us alone & we'll leave YOU alone. Fair? Gay marriage has NOTHING to do with YOUR marriage.

Let's repeat this: a gay couple getting married has NOTHING to do with your marriage to your fundie spouse. Stop being an ass to the homosexuals because of your sexual frustration within YOUR marriage!

* Thank God I don't have kids who live in Chicago. I'd say "hell no!" to this one.

Let's see: there's the unappetizing lunches, the health content involved (to my knowledge it hasn't changed since Super Size Me), general selective eating, etc. These school board members and powers that be who made this choice should be forced to eat the cafeteria food themselves. If they wouldn't touch it or even feed it to their dogs, they have no right to demand school children to eat it if they don't have medical conditions. Meddling at its worst.

What next? Force everyone who's skinny to take injections to be just like the fat kids so the fat kids won't feel bad about themselves? I see this policy just helping anorexic kids out since they'll have a good excuse not to eat.

* Speaking of the picky eater argument, I read this Dear Prudence column yesterday.

Okay, here's the thing. I am a picky eater & there's no medical reason or some such nonsense. Nor do I need "therapy" for it.

You want to know why I'm picky? Genetics or environment, take your pick.

First off, my mom is a very picky eater. Don't give her onions, cabbage, garlic, etc. She's not going to eat it. Because she wasn't one of those hypocrites who made her kids eat things she wouldn't eat herself, we weren't given certain things as kids. No brussel sprouts, turnips, salmon, etc., etc. I also grew up in the South & certain cuisine is not good down there. This was even more true when I was younger & there were very few "ethnic" people.

Second, my family did not have the money to take us out to eat at fancy restaurants. I didn't even get to go to a casual dining restaurant to sit and eat until I was in high school and that was because I got inducted into the National Honor Society. We were lucky to get fast food once a week as kids.

Finally, most people I know do not eat "exotic fare." They are "burgers, french fries, chicken tenders" kind of people. Some of them don't eat any vegetables while others eat a few, including me.

I saw a lot of comments on this letter about how "this person eats like a little kid" and anyone who's a picky eater either needs therapy or should have their diet critiqued by snobby foodies.

That's not what I needed. I ate more things by hanging out with different people, going to college and actually getting to go places + try food without having to waste lots of money on things I might not like. That's how I got to eat Mexican food.

News for you foodies: stop playing food police & denigrating people who don't eat squid, eyeballs, tofu or other exotic fare. Shut the fuck up about what I put into MY body. It has no effect on YOU unless it causes gasiness & you're in the same general area. There's no harm to YOU because of what I eat, got it? And health concerns? Butt out & focus on your own health. I'll bet you weigh more than me.

I'd rather die at 80 eating what I wanted than live to 100 eating nothing but tofu & cardboard. Enjoy life a little; maybe then you'll remove that stick from your ass.

I've tried particular things. I don't like them, I won't eat them. If I go to a restaurant and PAY for my food, you'd better believe I have every right to have my meal without onion, cilantro, salmon or whatever I don't eat that I will taste if I simply "pick it off." However, I do like cooked asparagus and zucchini (which I never got to have without going to events as an adult). I actually had black caviar at a lawyer event that was topping an appetizer I ate & it didn't even register a taste to me; I'd eat that again.

Go to Hell if you think picky eating is a deal breaker. Many people don't live in major cities, have relatives from foreign countries or like fusion cuisine. Find a fusion or Thai restaurant in my hometown that you'd eat at and not worry about the food quality. There's a reason you won't find that kind of thing on the scale you find fast food, BBQ places, casual dining, etc. I think that's probably the case in Middle America.

Interestingly enough, no one I know has ever bitched at me about what I do or don't eat in a restaurant. If anything, the picky are saving a restaurant money because they can save that onion, red cabbage, guacamole, egg, cilantro, etc. for those who DO eat it. It's why I prefer places that make their foods in the kitchen and don't use mixes. I've also not noticed many men playing food police. Most of the ones I know are "meat and potatoes" types & some downright won't bother going to certain types of restaurants.

I also think this debate is a tad classist. The "I eat everything" folk apparently come from money or health nuts. Personally, if you are worried about that in a life partner you have very big problems and would be labeled a whiny, preachy person around "meat & potatoes" people.

* Special bravo to Prince for this. He's entirely right, you know. Ticketmaster IS the devil!

* This I would not do for an ex. Thankfully, my husband has no plans to leave me or cheat on me. We have a very simple solution for that one. It seems like children seem to play more in those decisions; one more good reason not to have kids. If you'd still been friends years later, that's one thing. Otherwise, I'd just let karma handle it.

* However, I'd do this in a second. Again, kill a family member of mine then get smug & laugh about it? I won't be responsible for my actions & I think any lawyer could have a viable argument for temporary insanity if not total insanity.

I also think the terms "little bitch" or "slut" apply to this ex-girlfriend & I'd have called her this much for making such cracks. Remember, you probably had sex with him & most likely cheated on him. What does that make YOU?

I'd also have to say "I'm sorry your family is going to have to pay for your funeral expenses because I'm going to rip your head off if you don't shut the hell up and get out of my sight permanently." These scumbags wouldn't be able to walk the streets without 24 hour security if it were me.

The world at large should be thrilled I'm only putting this kind of thing in my creative work instead of going out & doing it in real life. Give most people opportunities, you prevent criminal acts.

* And gee, why am I not shocked by this? I almost want to thank the company that left me in job offer limbo for months for not getting back to me. Now I don't have to endure the belligerent and abusive skies!

* Also not a shocker. Gee, who wants move to Sweden now? I'd consider it.

Seems part of worker abuse in America is cultural differences that allow it to flourish. If you ask me, that difference is the dumbing down and sheepledom that result.

I bet if segregation were the norm today, you have millions of apologists saying "Oh, don't cause trouble." and "Don't go protest this. You're interrupting law & order." Look at how people react toward those who protest constitutional violations in the form of TSA screenings, graduation ceremonies and high school racism. If you don't think I'm right, then you have much higher hopes for humanity (& perhaps more naivete) than I do.

* Finally, read about high school girls using Facebook to claim their prom dresses.

If you want a unique, one of a kind dress I have a more radical idea. Get someone to MAKE your dress!!! Pick a fabric & style you want. If you browse stores & the Internet carefully, I guarantee no one will be copying you + you won't be ruining the moment by announcing what you're wearing beforehand.

Or get something & alter it if you have some sewing skills. That or let someone else do it.

Ladies, you NEVER tip your hand when going to a prom. Would you post pictures of your wedding dress on Facebook if all your friends were getting married at the same time so that your friends don't copy you? Do you think celebrities do this for red carpet events? I don't think so: the element of surprise is just as important.

Plus, how do you know someone's not just going to lie & hold a dress you like so you can't wear it to then show up in something no one else "claimed?" Teenage girls can be real bitches; I was one once & I certainly could be one when I wanted to. If you've got hundreds for a prom dress, I'm pretty sure you can pay the same money to a dress maker for a one of a kind; bonus if you know someone who has the ability to do it.

So there you have it. Now I should have time to watch another movie I haven't seen this afternoon.

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Dispelling A Few Myths

And yes, they are myths. Two issues (among many, of course) that really rile me up & irritate me to no end. Here goes:

Recently, a single friend of mine was lamenting on some dating drama. Despite being an ambitious, successful person you'd objectively say was a total catch, this person is still on that search for "the One."

Now having faced a lot of that myself as a single person & still believing it was a total fluke that led me to meeting my "One," I can relate well. I also had a lot of rejection from guys + tended to be the dumped party more than the one who did the dumping. I got a lot of flack for being who I am & refused to apologize or change my personality for anyone. I felt I ought to be accepted for me, not what someone wanted me to be. Truthfully, I think everyone deserves that in a relationship. I feel that if you would change who you are for someone, it means that you don't value or love yourself. You know what they say about people who don't love themselves & accept themselves for who they are? You can't love anyone else + they can't love you either.

So, leading to myth #1 to dispel: Women want guys who treat them like shit. The "bad boy," if you will. Not leather jacket or adventurous person but "bad boy" like "player."

This is the biggest crock of shit I've heard, if I do say so myself. At least, if you're talking about women who are mature adults operating within a rational mindset. Women who are not abuse victims or suffering from alcoholism, drug addiction or other afflictions that mess w/your head.

Perhaps youth but I knew better than to put up with that crap from others when I was 7/8, okay? I knew not to moon over my first grade boyfriend who gave me my first kiss and then decided to make goo goo eyes at my best friend the next year. I recognized him for the slug he was & I was 7/8 years old.

If you are over 18 years old and operating under a rational mindset, then what's your excuse for rejecting "nice guys" in favor of the "bad boy?" You're the kind of woman who makes my gender look pathetic & who is kicking us in the teeth. You are a far bigger embarrassment than any adult film star, stripper or prostitute could hope to be.

If you're putting up with that because you can't afford to leave, well that argument is an endorsement for prostitution. After all, aren't prostitutes trading sex for money & often not enjoying it? Yet, some of these same people are holier than thou religious types who'd shun prostitutes, web cam girls, etc. in a second while shouting about how they'll burn in Hell for "sinning."

I told my friend that if someone doesn't want to date someone w/ambition, value for other's dreams, income and who'd treat a date with respect, then they've got serious problems. NO ONE should have to change who they are to have a romantic relationship; again, everyone deserves to have a person who supports their dreams & loves them for who they are.

I partly said it b/c I know that if my friend were in my hometown, he'd have to fight off the women with a stick. He may not like the caliber of some of these women but he is a staircase up from the deadbeats some of them took up with. Maybe it was slim pickings? I don't know.

But the women who put up with the deadbeats and have no affliction that you can get treatment for (meaning they voluntarily and freely put up with it) are women I can't respect. They are worse than the deadbeats since they allow it to happen & are showing great examples for any children they may have.

Don't give me that "I'm doing this for the kids" bit, either. Do you REALLY think my living with an alcoholic parent in a 2 parent household was better for my well-being than my parents separating and having to live in a "broken" home? My home was already "broken" by living with the alcoholic. Same goes for any kid living in a home where their parents are unhappy & are not the Cleavers.

They also perpetuate that little "bad boys" myth. Contrary to Family Guy, a real woman would kick you right in testicles if you treated her badly & that's if she felt charitable at the time. I expect any female friend of mine would do it just out of respect for the female gender.

Now to myth #2: any part of New Jersey qualifies as NYC.

It DOES NOT, for the hundredth time. East Rutherford, NJ is NOT, nor will it ever be, NYC. This is in reference to a music concert my husband & I wanted to go to years back that claimed it was their NYC show when the concert was in East Rutherford, NJ. People had to drive to get there & undoubtedly would have had to pay a fortune for parking after going through the tolls.

I don't care how any of you want to color it, Jersey is a separate place. Be proud of being in New Jersey. It's not a bad state and it does have things you can't find in NYC or other areas. After all, they have cheaper gas, actual Chick-Fil-A restaurants, Dairy Queen & other things you can't find in NY state, much less NYC. I think it has its own little quirks, really.

But don't call yourself a NYC resident if you're living in Jersey. It's not the same thing. You're not on our transit line. Stop being a wannabe & claim yourself as a Jersey resident. Think of it this way: at least you don't live in West Virginia.

* Sorry, I'm from NC & we actually rag on West Virginia just as NY residents rag on Jersey.

And event promoters, same goes for you! We're not stupid and we're not buying it. Why don't I just start calling Connecticut "Boston" or Rhode Island "Connecticut?" I've never heard anyone do that. Either pay up for NY space or just be honest & admit your event is in Jersey, all right? Stop trying to steal our thunder!

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Instant Fame: Be Careful What You Wish For

A friend of mine is on a goal to become famous & recently did a music video he's trying to get You Tube views for. This friend is also a newer attorney & a Renaissance person. Unless he gives me permission, I'm not revealing his name or linking to his video. That's not really the point of this.

A friend of his asked him his views about singers being on shows like "American Idol" or "The X Factor." Since I have some particularly strong views on that, I chose to write a short response & got inspired to write a rant.

Little thing about reality TV: you will not become a legitimate source by doing it. I mentioned working with that well known talent agent before who hated reality TV just as much as I do.

First though, I should distinguish certain types of "reality TV" shows.

1. Cameras following someone on their job (think Dog the Bounty Hunter): these I take no issue with if we're not watching contrived situations. If there's no script or manufactured drama, these are more like documentaries on TV. I've actually read both Dog the Bounty Hunter books & he mentioned that they weren't doing the show to become celebrities.

That is the right attitude to have about this industry in general. To me, these are reality shows NOT "reality" shows.

2. Contest shows (think The Bachelor): I could care less. I have too much going on in my own life.

3. Throw people into a situation (think The Real World, Survivor or Jersey Shore): same as #2.

4. Revenge tactics or confrontation (think Cheaters or Disaster Date): I wish I'd come up with some of these since I think they're brilliant. Assuming you're not getting actors to play the real people, we all like seeing people squirm especially if they deserved it in some way. No problem w/these kinds of shows & I view them in the same lens as #1 if you're using real people.

5. Shows offering instant fame (think American Idol): that's the topic of this rant.

Let me make some distinction between American Idol & Star Search since they are different:

* American Idol offers recording contracts as prizes. Star Search did not. Star Search ONLY gave you exposure, which obviously did not help every single contestant.

* American Idol allows for audience voting. None of that on Star Search. You were simply judged on your actual skill, NOT how you looked in a low cut dress, your hard luck story or superficial crap that has zero relevance to your talent like how many teenage girls scream over you.

This "audience voting" has also been widely accused of being rigged, aside from the fact that you are charged money to do it so it's all based on the votes of rich & stupid people. I think you'd have to be an idiot to waste your money to vote on shows like American Idol. I bet you also would have paid some 900 number for phone sex & thought the women on the other end looked like the ones in the commercials. These days, if you're paying for texts, you'd better count on the fact that you could be corresponding with someone of your gender & not know it. Same logic in my book.

* The Star Search producers didn't manufacture things or tell people to hide their sexual orientation. This has happened with American Idol.

* Now if you have actual knowledge that Star Search did do this sleazy stuff, tell me. I was never on it & don't claim to be an expert. I'm just basing this on what I've seen reported in the press & don't know of these kinds of things happening on Star Search.*

I NEVER had a problem with a show like Star Search. I'd probably consider trying out for something with that format.

However, you will never see me audition for American Idol. Yes, I might have talent & enough people have said I should but there are many reasons why I wouldn't. If you are smart, you won't either:

1. Selling your soul: If you get on one of these shows & get the prize, you're forced to be what the show wants you to be. To Hell with anything YOU want to do, any look YOU want or even the details of your life. If it's not "friendly" to their demographic, you'll be forced to silence yourself & essentially be a robot. They're a business, first & foremost.

Rights in your music? HA! Branching into new areas? Yeah, right. Being married or not prancing around like trash if you're female? Get real!

Can you blame some celebrities for saying "enough is enough" & rebelling? I can't & it's why I can have some sympathy.

2. No credibility: For an example of this, watch the second season of Extras. Great show but in that season, the lead character gets his own series. Problem is, it's not his vision & panders to the lowest common denominator. David Bowie even makes fun of him in a song.

Remember when I said being on reality TV doesn't make you credible? It doesn't. You will never be taken as seriously as people like David Bowie, Pearl Jam, Bruce Springsteen or others who worked for years to get where they are & had the industry players come to them so they could be in control of their own careers. I, and others in the business, will always remember you as that person who won a reality TV contest & stepped over people who are more talented + willing to struggle for their art.

3. You're a whore: Simple as that. I view many reality TV shows as one step above doing porno. How many people have you seen successfully cross into the mainstream from adult film? Very few. You can say the same for people on "reality" TV. The people doing reality shows (the lack of quotation marks is on purpose) don't tend to make public spectacles of themselves in the name of getting famous.

So if you're looking for instant fame, you'll certainly get it by being on a "reality show" but that doesn't mean you'll get respect, integrity or any credibility. Those you have to work for & earn. It also doesn't mean you'll be happy with your art. That also requires work. Look at how many starving artists we've had. Some weren't even recognized or respected until they died.

If you're an indie person, some of the only things you have are your vision, your principles and your integrity. I don't think success/making $ from your work = being a sellout (calling someone a sellout for that reason means you're a hater) but if you're violating your principles or doing things you're uncomfortable with, then you've earned the label. For many I know, their principles aren't for sale. Mine certainly aren't.

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Extra Gig #4: Getting Paid to Wear an Evening Gown, Selecting Your Assistants and The Interesting World of Extras. Also, Foreshadowing?

Last night, I got to do my very first evening extra gig for a TV pilot. I'm not going to violate any confidentiality matters or give you names of people. As a general matter, you shouldn't rely on me to know who some famous person is b/c I just don't care. I've got my own problems & unless that person is giving me $, getting my student loan debt canceled, making sure my husband gets the promotion he deserves or otherwise doing something mega nice for me, my business or a loved one, it's not worth my time to be concerned about such things.

I was quite happy to get this call. For one thing, I own a LOT of evening gowns; I'm talking 8 or so. Many of them could use alterations, I'd like to get repairs for some & my bridesmaid dress from my sister's first wedding is way too big on me now but I still look awesome in them. After all, I make it a point to pick things & dress in a way that you won't see 10 other people doing unless they specifically copied me.

I also love getting to dress up in these things. The right dress can make you feel like royalty. For me, the evening gown is the height of feeling like the most beautiful woman in the world. I suppose it's like the leather jacket or a uniform for a guy: even the ugliest woman can look 1,000 times better in an evening gown.

I actually wanted a job where I had to wear evening gowns. I figured I could be great at that since I always feel gorgeous in them; plus, no one could make you do all that much or you'd mess up the dress.

So, unknowingly Central Casting gave me a shot to live that dream. You'd better believe I was taking it.

They asked people to provide 2 gowns; I brought 4 since I had them, including the black dress I wore to get married. That black dress was the one they picked, along with my bling that went with another dress I was originally wearing. Not a combination I'd thought of but I defer to the decision makers when I'm on someone else's set. Worked well, I think. Also didn't have to deal with my hair getting caught in the rhinestone straps of the dress I was originally wearing, which was a relief. That dress works so much better when my hair is up but I'm not a beautician. That's one job I think will always be available since people are shallow by nature. But I digress...

Some observations:

* This set had the most congenial group of extras I've ever encountered. I've been to gigs where no one made real effort to speak to me in holding or people clung to those they knew. Here, a woman sitting at my table actually engaged the table in conversation and spoke to me. Another lady at my table also liked that I got married in that black dress & how I structured my wedding. We're still going strong after over 4 years so I think flouting tradition was the way to go here.

At one point when I was waiting in the hair & make-up line (because, again, I like to let the decision makers say whether I look acceptable to be on the set), one young woman who'd just gotten her make-up done tried cutting in front of me & a bunch of other actresses. A different young woman who'd gotten her make-up done earlier says "Lots of people are waiting here to get their hair and make-up done & haven't had anything. The line starts back there." The attempted line breaker asks me if I'm in line for hair specifically & I said "I'm doing both, whatever I get first." Then, she moves to the back of the line.

The lady who spoke up said she apparently saw the look on my face when this line breaker tried that & wanted to keep others from getting screwed. Guess I'm more obvious in expressing my real feelings than I think. I appreciate the sentiment, though I didn't actually mention about being a lawyer + having my own film company & friends who could easily hear about this. Remember, you never know who's doing extra work.

This couldn't be more true that in my conversation with a gentleman who was commuting from a very long way to the shoot & had done a lot in the business.

Considering that someone who tried to call me incompetent was immediately blacklisted when I wasn't even a partner at the film company, can you imagine what would happen if you were an ass to me & I revealed it to my people? I think that says it all.

I even got a business card from the woman who complimented my dress & non-traditional wedding arrangements.

* Didn't see a single person I knew from the scam TV network or my behind the scenes work. That's a shocker, though I did see someone I worked w/briefly on Gig #1. However, didn't speak to her.

* I also saw some wonderful professionalism from a particular extra I worked with for a scene. While I see many being Chatty Cathys on the set, even though you're supposed to be silent while the powers that be are trying to direct, coordinate, set up equipment, etc. I tend to only speak when spoken to, keep the conversation brief & then in whisper (as a compromise to professionalism vs. not being rude to whoever spoke to me). The gentleman I was working with said "I hope you don't find me rude." and explains that he listens when they say to be quiet.

THANK YOU!!!!! I explained that I've been on sets, have my own company & don't like to disturb other people's ability to work.

* The person in charge of corralling the extras was the best coordinator I've ever encountered. Now others I've dealt with were good but she was great. She introduced herself, told you what her role was on the set, was congenial & didn't give me a vibe of superiority. She seemed to give authority without the least bit of brusqueness. I heard extras say positive things about her & I think some of them felt more motivation to do a good job for her benefit. As a behind the scenes person, this is the sort of person I would want on my set.

* One downside: didn't like getting a 7 p.m. time & not really having food for a while. I didn't have a viable way to eat a real dinner since I didn't get home until about 3:40 + set dismissal was after 1 a.m. There was a craft services area in a small hallway. It got backed up.

One smart ass crew person, whom I'm not sure was serious or joking decides to quote the famous Silence of the Lambs line in motivating people not to hang around the table while others were in line. A variation on "Put the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again." Something about "going back to Holding again?" Not sure if he heard my comment of "you may not want to say that to a psychotic" but I didn't hear him make that crack after I said my piece.

He'd also made comment on how craft services were a courtesy for doing the work. That's half true. We have a little thing called labor laws & unions; plus, I'd have a case for false imprisonment if you confine me to a location for a long time period & don't give me food. People in offices can go to a vending machine or leave to take a break. You can't leave a set.

Little tip: if a master of sarcasm has to wonder if you're serious or joking when you say something you may want to try a different tact. Some of us could help your career or end it. Go back to the part about never knowing who your extras are. Being a dick is a good way to end your career before it starts.

Oh, and attorneys are revered in this industry; messing with us is like stealing food from a lion or taunting a snake. Eventually, things are going to end badly for you & most people will say you got what you deserved, perhaps earning yourself a Darwin award.

Not to mention attorneys are looking for any hustle they can get to pay off six figure loan debt considering the legal job market stinks.

So, what was it like getting paid to wear an evening gown? I think I would want to wear comfortable shoes for a good part of the day, get sitting breaks & according to my husband, I'd need arch supports. My lower back kills me if I'm standing for too long & my toes were killing me when I got back. A carpeted floor might be okay as well. Good news is I broke in my new black high heels that I bought specifically for formal wear & in anticipation of extra work.

Aside from that, I'm officially doing fewer submissions. I might take gigs if asked & don't have schedule conflicts but I have to guard my image carefully. I don't want extra work obscuring other things I do. Even with over 100 people present, I was still the only natural redhead who looked like me. The person who helped with the attempted line breaker was the only person who even came close to me in appearance.

I think I've just about gotten the learning experience, which is the main reason I decided to do this in the first place. As a naturally observant person, I'll always take notes of who is professional vs. who's not & hopefully have more conversations w/people since that gives me insight on people's views, motivations, etc. I also think the experience has given me a general respect for background actors & direct insight into motivations that I might not have had.

Plus, I have to pick #5 carefully since after that, I'll no longer do any submissions. It will be a strict asking thing by that point. I've also still got job limbo issues to deal with so I figure my schedule could easily change up & I'd have no time anyway.

On another note, after I got home & settled I went to sleep and had an odd dream.

In the dream, my ex who was 14 years older than me was in it & had a younger brother. This sex buddy I had in college called him "dirty old man." Whether he was jealous or not, I have no idea. To my knowledge, the dirty old man ex didn't have a younger brother.

In this dream, my sister was having sexual relations with the younger brother. I happened to pass outside & see them in her bedroom through a window. At a separate point in the dream, I see her, the younger brother & a friend of hers naked on her bed. I was outside with my ex and in the dream, we weren't together. I asked him "When we were dating, did you think I was sexually adventurous?" I remember feeling that my sister was taking the crown away from me since my dream self (and my real self, for that matter) wouldn't do a threesome. He reassured me that I was & seemed somewhat concerned about the brother but not nearly as concerned as I was about my sister.

Now, I'd been wearing these pajama pants that were part of a set this ex got me for Christmas one year. It was the most a boyfriend had spent on me for a Christmas gift before my husband (he'd gotten me a lot of other clothes from the same place as well as some Sketchers sneakers, starting my love for Sketchers sneakers). I don't associate these clothes with this ex, they're just part of my wardrobe like anything else.

Anyway, I notice that there's a hole in the center of the back & point this out to my husband. I asked if he knew about it & he said no.

Later on, he pulls me onto his lap where I'm facing him. He decides to make this hole bigger & literally rips off the back of the pants. I told him he should buy me new ones; he was cool w/it.

I find it creepy that I'd had a dream about that ex & then that happened. No conscious thought trigger memories of that ex. The only thing might have been my niece's passing 2 years ago yesterday & my hanging around him the evening my brother in law died in 2003 despite our having broken up earlier in the year with no real closure. He proved he was capable of being a decent person that night & as I've not had much of that in life, I still appreciate that gesture since it gave me a sliver of faith in humanity. Plus, he's one of the few exes I don't wish harm on though I'd never try that being friends stuff. Symbolism? You decide.

Friday, April 1, 2011

Don't Hate on Me Because I'm Skinny

I just saw this story yesterday, after getting more details on an extra gig I'm doing this evening. That will be #4, meaning that I'd better pick my next one very carefully since I plan to unofficially retire from extra work. I have my own projects in line & don't want to become known as "that extra." When you look like me & there's so few people around who do, you run into that potential problem. I'll only do gigs after my 5th one if I get asked & have the time in my schedule.

Anyhow, I read that yesterday & agree that it sucks that the employees got treated that way. I'm all for wanting to file suit if it was some sneaky way to get rid of higher paid, older workers.

That's not what has me ticked. Read the comments.

Notice all the skinny hate? People get all whiny & mad when fat people or anyone higher than size X get ridiculed. Yet, the same "big is beautiful" crowd will turn around & make cracks about skinny women. Like "size 2 & 4 women are meth addicts, teenagers, suffering from eating disorders, Asian, flat chested, exercise excessively, etc."

Guess what? I'M a size 2 and I'm none of this crap. The most I did was take my intro Jiu Jitsu course a month ago. Otherwise, I don't even leave my house that much & really don't work out save the occasional walk to the bank or some other place I have to go.

I also don't starve myself or feel pressured to be skinny. I've always been skinny (I was a size 5 in high school). Forget about me gaining weight until I hit 40 or so. I couldn't gain weight if I wanted to. This is a genetic thing: my mom was a size 7 until around that time & this was after having both me + my sister.

If you're a size 2, what's life like? I'll tell you.

* You have to rummage around to find clothing that fits you & doesn't cost a fortune. Know what it's like to have to find someone who can alter your stuff so it fits you properly? The only business suit I have that makes me look like a bad ass came from a store that is tailored to Asian women.

* You have family members wonder why you're so thin & fear you getting thinner even though you don't diet. Telling me to go on a diet or eat super health food would earn you a good, hearty laugh & convince me you're stupid.

* You have to worry about being sexually harassed or getting treated as a sex object. Not really an issue for me since I've been in more academic settings & don't conduct myself as a typical flirty girl. If I did, I'd have 1,000 times more haters. At least I'm a natural redhead so I have natural redhead legend to back up any assertion that I'll cut off some guy's dick if he pisses me off. That tends to make a smart person think twice.

* You get hit on a lot. Well, I have. Despite being married & no longer interested in anyone other than hubby. At least I do have backing if my husband took me for granted or cheated on me: I could find someone to cheat with much quicker.

This gets awkward when you're trying to do professional networking. How would you like to think you're having a professional conversation with someone only to learn they're too busy fantasizing about you in your birthday suit?

Is it no wonder I work in the entertainment industry? People there don't have green eyed monster bitchiness towards me for looking as I look. Plus, the industry deems me pretty without me having to put in effort I didn't want.

So if you attack me for being smaller, call me names or assume nasty things about me, expect me & every other skinny woman to dish it right back out at you. It goes both ways, people.

Oh, and excuse me for living because I chose not to have kids & gain baby weight (for those mothers who resent me because I'm thin & they're not anymore). You made your choices; I made mine. Deal with it.