So I learn yesterday that my nephew, the sweetest, cutest 7 year old I know, is the victim of some school bullies. I did a post covering this issue before & like the typical bullying story, the school personnel are being ignorant chuckleheads who apparently want to become victims of gunshots when a bullied kid finally snaps and engages in his/her own little Columbine.
I already have a zero tolerance policy on bullying & at least my sister did the right thing by telling him not to let any little brat push him down without giving the little prick what for. I'll be teaching this kid some self-defense tactics when I'm down there if he needs it. Hell, I lived bullying more than my sister so if anyone's the authority on it, I have to be right up there. My husband also faced serious bullying & could be of help. My sister constantly remarks that living with him is like living with me all over again & that he's also a shy kid so who better to address it?
That leads to another thought: why is it that shy people are almost never appreciated for who they are? Why do we have to cater to the agenda and prejudice of the social butterflies of the world? Even the Queens County Bar Association did this. I can tell you from my sorority recruiting days that you'd never get away with passing the buck like this if you didn't make some shy potential member feel welcome in your house. Not in my chapter, at least where diversity of thought and personality were praised just as much as any in skin color or ethnicity.
Today, I don't consider myself outgoing though I can network like a fiend. I'm just someone who's passionate, knows the game & tries to focus on creating genuine relationships with others. I don't contribute to conversations unless I have something useful to say & I need time to warm up to a social setting where I don't know anyone. That or you can start talking to me. After that, I'll respond.
These school admins better get their act together. The parents of these little brats better start handing out discipline before I roll into town or, oh boy. One of my exes once told me I had the capacity to be like Livia Soprano; people don't tell you that if you're some docile wimp that the world at large can walk on.
I will happily remind them of the lawsuit potential, about Columbine and inform my nephew that he'll be doing far better than these assholes if he keeps his eyes on the prize & realizes that there's a great big world far away from the redneck enclave he's being forced to live in. The jockos will just become Al Bundy anyway. My detractors also have a way of suffering misfortune after getting on my bad side though I had no personal hand in it. Call it karma or turnabout. I have the last laugh anyway since I'm getting to live my dreams and I'll bet 99% of them aren't.
If he wanted to go to boarding school & I had the money, I'd make it happen for him in a second because God knows I wanted to do that at his age. If you'd offered me that as a kid, you wouldn't have had to ask me twice. A place where you can create your own identity & be away from your dysfunctional family while learning truly useful lessons? Hell yeah!
So hopefully, I'll get to impart some of my knowledge & world savvy onto him so he doesn't suffer the emotional shit I and others had to.
If you're a bullied person or know someone who is, a little tip. Your detractors are nothing & not worth impressing.
They are shitheads, pricks, scumbags, whatever insult you have to call them to put them back in the gutter where they belong. They aren't better than you and if they dare to belittle you, they aren't even as good as you. They are nothing, end of story.
If you belittle others, you aren't special. Your shit smells just as bad as everyone else's (probably worse, in fact) and you bleed, die, get sick and eat like anyone else. Get over yourself if you believe otherwise.
When I stopped worrying about what people thought of me, I had a much better life complete with self-esteem. I think eventually, the popular kids & so forth respected me because I respected myself. That realization didn't kick in until very late in high school and it didn't really hit until I was doing stage work and people applauded for me. No one booed or heckled me when I sang or acted; I even got compliments and standing ovations. People mess w/you, remember these sage words from The Angry Redheaded Lawyer: fuck 'em.
That philosophy is probably why I'd never work in a mega-law firm. I've just long evolved from the 7th grade clique shit mentality (which I call it b/c I had to face the worst bullying when I was in 7th grade & from the smart girls clique).