Monday, March 15, 2010

A Church as a Nightclub??

I just found this provocative.

How do I feel about this?? Good question. My mother was one of the people I knew who suggested meeting men in church.

To be honest, that idea always made me feel sleazy. First off, aren't you supposed to be going to church for the service & because you believe in that church's platform/teachings/philosophies? Second, if I'm using church to troll for men, how far should I go?? Should I just walk in wearing a short dress with stilettos & tons of cleavage? Do I just start looking at men's butts or trying to get an idea of dick length while I'm sitting in a church? Should I start chatting w/other women my age in the church to get an idea of the eligible men?

Come to think of it, what if that church's dating pool is like a soap opera? If everyone's got a history with someone, I know I'd want no part of it. That's a big reason I never dated anyone I went to school with--I didn't care to have everyone there know what my private parts look like or how good I am in bed. If they had, I'd have never gotten any homework done & eventually flunked out. My dating life was crazy enough without anyone knowing that kind of thing about me.

Finally, I just think it's like having sex on someone's headstone: it's disrespectful. I don't see getting horny in a church or forging a real connection with a guy you meet there. Not to mention there are plenty of scummy men who attend church; plenty of pedophiles & serial killers have been active church members, you know?

I like the idea of having a non-religious nightclub in a church w/no conversion attempts. It probably helps that church get credibility and membership from people who'd never attend otherwise. However, I wonder about the practicality of it all.

I know meeting guys in bars & clubs isn't all that great but I was WAY too shy to approach anyone. I also know I'd have been uncomfortable approaching anyone in a church; plus, with my luck the guy would be super-devout & simply not worth my time due to the obvious differences.

Call me shallow but I don't prescribe to the idea of being a virgin until you get married: look at "Sex & the City." Not to mention the simple fact that sex is an important part of marriage & you'd better know ahead of time whether you have anything in that department. I wouldn't even stay in a celibate marriage; thankfully, my husband feels the exact same way. How many problems have happened b/c of people denying their sexual urges or seeing sex as shameful? Not to mention how society makes fun of people who are still virgins at 25 & upwards. Plus, do you want your first sexual experience to be the result of a rape?

That's not to say I think 15 year olds should be having sex. You just need to be old enough & mature enough to accept the responsibility + consequences that go with it. If you can't raise a baby on your own or get birth control, you don't need to do it.

The basic thing I come down to on this issue is whether you can face yourself the next day if you decide to have sex. After all, it's your life & you have to live with your own life choices. If you can deal with that, then to hell with what anyone else has to say about you.

As my high school Chemistry teacher once said, have meaningful experiences when you're young so when you're 60, you won't look back & wish you'd done more with your life.

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