We're all familiar with the Snuggie and pajama jeans as well as their design solely for the lazy among us. Okay, the Snuggie would also be useful for those who want to pretend they are members of a religious cult (I'm still waiting to see someone do that on a NYC subway while begging for money); if I got one, I'd have to add some Velcro to the back so it would close.
And perhaps pajama jeans are useful if you're suffering from a long term illness where you have some good days but why, oh why, would you wear such a thing outdoors among the public? If appearances count in the world, single people who want to date & actors would never be caught dead in them. Same goes for fashionistas. Standards, people! Please? If you want a hot guy, you'll not get him wearing pajama jeans (I'm sure this is just as true for gay men as straight women).
But I just saw a commercial for a product that illustrates a new low in laziness: the Genie Bra. If you haven't seen that infomercial yet, chances are you will soon. Just in case you don't, go here to learn about it.
The pitch of the thing asks if you're unhappy having back fat when you wear your bra or having fat leaking out from the top of your breasts, pitching the "Genie Bra" as the way to prevent such things.
Okay, as someone who worked in a lingerie department for 3 years & learned how to get the proper bra size let me clear up the mystery.
The reason you have back fat when wearing a bra is because the band is too small!!!
You have fat coming out of your bra cup because your bra cup is too small!!!
50% of women don't wear the proper bra size. My mother made a big deal about making sure that didn't happen to us.
So instead of wasting your money on an As Seen on TV infomercial product that may not even work, let me give you some real advice:
1. Go to a lingerie store & get a salesperson to measure you to determine your size. Not a Wal-Mart or Target & maybe not even a JcPenney (where I did my lingerie work but God only knows if they still include that in new employee training since I haven't worked there in over 10 years). Ideally, you have access to a small, independent lingerie shop where the sales staff have time to give you personal attention but I'm sure a Victoria's Secret would suffice.
2. Stop living in the delusion that you are a size that doesn't fit. Guess what?? You might be fat now. Stop bitching about this & go buy a bra that fits. No one else is going to see the band or cup size unless you take your bra off or decide to be intimate with someone. If someone can tell this by sight, they are either a pervert who doesn't deserve the time of day or a professional who has more class than to announce such things to the world. If that professional does not, again a pervert who doesn't deserve the time of day.
Do you get it? Maybe you'd have a case if you're a stripper but most women aren't working in the adult industry & if this bothers you, chances are you don't either. Otherwise, you've got some very good drugs that people would probably pay you a fortune to get.
This is one of those things that most people don't notice or comment on unless you're whining about it.
Products like this are just encouraging laziness & making people stupid. Do we really need more of that in this country? Isn't GPS enough?
If you're in a country that's not experiencing a massive brain drain, please tell me where that magical land is so I can consider it when planning a vacation & in any future immigration plans.