Seriously, it has. After a relaxing vacation last week, my husband returned to work to have to continue dealing with the same old bullshit...
Until the same old bullshit became threats to personal safety & activated my radar. Here's the story:
Yesterday, at my neighborhood public library, a brawl concerning 8 teenaged boys breaks out right next to the desk where my husband had been covering. Thankfully, he wasn't there & isn't fucking stupid enough to play cop when he's not paid to do that. His manager, on the other hand, decides she's going to intervene. Idiot. She got what she deserved for that one. Who would actually do that & NOT call the cops to let them handle it?
Though for her to REALLY get what she deserves, she should be demoted & forbidden from ever being in a position of authority until she learns not to write checks her behind can't cash.
Apparently, this event was unprecedented and this means my husband can't do his job without threat of violence. Oh, and if I were a woman I wouldn't bother going in there without a handgun or Taser on me since our police precinct is known for being ineffectual & showing up far too late to do anything.
Where were the cops on this one? The liaisons for this particular branch weren't even in the borough at the time. By the time they arrived, the guilty had fled & the victims weren't talking.
My husband isn't going back. That's by my edict & everyone else who's heard about this.
The wheels are in action for him to go elsewhere, which is complicated by the fact that he's on supervisor probation though this particular manager (whose name I'll gladly give you privately) is known for arbitrarily failing folks just to be a bitch. I'm pretty sure she gave head to the right person to still be manager there after pissing off staff members & the community at large.
Apparently, she's not smart enough to have set up this little brawl so she could fail my husband for not being He-Man. Sounds like she'd be a pitiful lawyer. She won't be manager much longer in my community if I get any say on it. I have a real problem with my tax dollars paying that bitch's salary. If you live in my area, so should you.
For now, my husband has some faith in management not fucking around. I don't. After contacting the head of all this (whose nickname includes "the Ineffectual" since he refuses to transfer one librarian who hates it there & is openly hostile to everyone b/c he "doesn't want her to win"; fuck the community or morale or the working environment there--in fact, fuck his manager who has to supervise this unhappy camper & deal with it day to day unlike his ineffectual ass), he apparently still thinks my husband should put his safety at risk.
I don't think this ineffectual prick knows who I am & what I do. If he did, I don't think he'd be handing me a slam dunk legal case if something happened to my husband or an excuse for me to end his life in a manner befitting a Quentin Tarantino film.
My husband has been all adamant about not mentioning who I am but I'm in fight mode. I will rain down a shit storm with hydrochloric acid rainfall mixed in; I have my official ways of doing things as well as unofficial ones.
I suggest that when they decide on where to transfer him (since it will fucking happen or I will meet with them personally on this), they ask themselves "Would I feel safe working here? Would I feel comfortable if my children were in this neighborhood after dark?" If the answers are "no," then that place is not an option. Capice? I will also have to have a conversation with the Queens Library attorney and see if he can motivate some dumbasses with the letter of the law. Perhaps tell them that maybe it's not a great idea to put an attorney's spouse in a danger situation since there will be an instant lawsuit. I'm not exactly just any attorney, either; I've got a public profile & contacts all over the spectrum. My spouse is far more likely to get adequate legal representation than most of the employees (or as they think of them, peons).
I can make life hell for someone who crosses me & I'll certainly do it if needed. When it comes to my loved ones & my friends, I'm downright sociopathic if you mess with them.
I know Thomas Galante, the library director (oh, excuse me President since he's got a God complex & likely wanted to evade the new salary regulations for the heads of non-profit organizations) has zero empathy or respect for the employees. He or his underlings want to try shit with me, they will live to regret it & I will make it my mission in life to take these people down including and especially him. I already spread the word wide & far about how utterly incompetent the management is & other business owners who have heard about their antics agree with me. Only an idiot would side with them.
Let's be honest: the management is laughable at best. My youngest niece & nephew (both under the age of 4) would be better at running the library system than these pathetic toads who are utterly devoid of ambition, basic human respect or any quality that would define one as a human being. This is my view as a business owner.
I wouldn't shed any tears or feel bad if they or one of their family members were raped, tortured, killed, or had any hard times at this moment; I have a strong feeling that my stance on them is not going to change.
None of these pricks had better think for a second they are better than me. In fact, I'd safely say I'm better than them. What education do they have? What contacts do they have? Who regards them? What is their public profile like?
Could they get their equivalent positions in a private business? From what I've seen, the answer is "Hell no."
So, here's where we stand. My husband hated being at this branch & will not be returning. If anyone asks, I'll be asking if they plan to provide an armed guard to escort him to & from work & be with him the entire time he's working, provide him with a loaded gun/Taser along with a bulletproof vest/body armor. If the answer to either is "no," my answer is "Then he won't be going. End of story." I'll also have to get personal since cunty behavior invites my asking you how you'd feel if it was YOUR kid, spouse, etc. If it were my local politician trying to make life easier for rapists or limit access to contraceptives, you'd best believe I'd ask them about scenarios involving THEM or THEIR loved ones.
If he can get in a better branch, at least we've solved that problem of him wanting to quit every single day & dumping that stress on me.
If they do nothing & then fire him, my life will most likely become a Taratino film since everything I worked my ass off to do will have gone up in a puff of smoke. I will have no place to live & there's no way in hell I'm going down without a fight. I won't have reasons to care about things like law & order, especially if my husband is harmed or killed. Nor will any of these mental midgets be allowed to take away my livelihood, my family or my purpose in this world.
I will also be livid that total incompetents like multiple branch managers in the system and various others will be keeping THEIR jobs & sucking up taxpayer money to continue fucking things up.
At this point, I have zero neighborhood pride or loyalty. Would YOU feel pride in a neighborhood where you can't even go to the public library & be content in your safety? I'd be better off going to a nightclub in Manhattan; at least they have bouncers. We didn't move here to live in Thug Town. I hate that area of my neighborhood anyway since it's in a public transit dead zone.
This just gives me more reason to root for gentrification & their families being priced out. I met with someone in charge of a social group in this neighborhood. I'll have to share & mention that this is just emblematic of my general attitude of Queens and this neighborhood.
A comedy producer I worked with once said she slept in New Jersey but lives in NYC. I feel I sleep in my neighborhood but I live in Manhattan. That's where everything I do business wise is, including my bar association memberships.
Why, especially in light of this library thing where Galante refuses to get any effective security in there, would I give a damn about this place? Who wants to hang around a bunch of little pussies who can't even fight effectively & whose parents would probably enable and defend their "menace to society" status to the very end?
Any moron can get a posse to beat up 1 guy. Any moron can get a weapon.
When I was in high school, there was the specter of fights. We were nicknamed "Thug High" by the community & the local newspaper even covered our fights, though normally got the details wrong.
Most of them were during break in plain sight of teachers & a big crowd of students. I refused to fight anyone in that setting since the teachers broke it up in about 5 seconds. You'd be lucky if you got 2 good hits in.
If I'd been challenged to one, I would have said "It's me vs. you. No friends, no weapons, no witnesses. You have to fight me during class time & behind one of the outdoor trailers. No one to bail you out or a little toadie to do your dirty work. Even odds or nothing."
I was like "Fight me like a woman or don't bother!" I hate half-assed measures at anything. I also might not be the strongest person but I'm a lot smarter & I'm far crazier, however that form takes. I could also fuck people up in the social order in ways that someone known as a thug/troublemaker couldn't do.
As I've said before, I'd have been a far more dangerous killer than the average thug/troublemaker since I knew the social rules, had a reputation as a kid beyond reproach & had access to things the average student didn't. That's probably still true but I'd rather take the pro-social route if it's available to me.
If that were closed, I know myself enough to know that I wouldn't have recourse or be able to roll backwards from all the shit I got out of.
What would that teach me or anyone else? You came from nothing so fuck getting good grades, getting an education or doing anything socially productive since you'll just end up a teen mom, a crack whore or homeless & hopeless in the end?
Gee, if I believed that I'd have ended my life long ago & taken as many oppressors as I could with me. I wouldn't have been able to live my happiest life so I'd see no point in wasting my time when it would never get better. This is the logic that makes me wonder why people who hate being attorneys so much & who feel there's no light at the end of the tunnel continue to be on the planet and write blog posts bitching about it.
Do we want mass suicide of young people who don't come from means? Or do we want them to use their brains to become societal nightmares? Make up your mind. This is world that's being created in the US.
Showing posts with label fighting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label fighting. Show all posts
Wednesday, April 10, 2013
Saturday, August 11, 2012
My Predictions Are Coming True & People Reading Craig's List Ads are Fighting Back
Yes, some of them are.
The first is that for now, things are working out on my husband's job front. Maybe someone did their homework on me or realized that maybe it wasn't a good idea to start triggering angry natural redhead lawyer wrath so they'd better not transfer him to some hellhole area & invite trouble. So that whole being spared from falling trees on Amtrak turned out to indeed be a sign that the situation would be resolved.
The second is that people are fighting back against shitty job ads on Craig's List. I swear I didn't write any of these but I kind of wish I had, especially the last one.
Here's the first ad that begged to be shared on free writing services:
WHAT? Looking for Free Editing (deadbeat city-POST IN VOLUNTEER)
Date: 2012-07-17, 10:17AM EDT
Reply to: 4m7xg-3144786649@gigs.craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
listen, who ever you are, this is a JOB BOARD where people are seeking to EARN MONEY to live on.............
You seek a volunteer not a professional writer...get it....PROFESSIONALS=GETS $$$$. The avg cost of a good freelance
writer is at least $25 an hour. Can't afford it? Well guess what, you can't have a website based business unless you write
it yourself...can't write? OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, then you can't have a website related business.
THAT'S LIFE
I wish you people who are looking for jobs would flag people like this and most of the intern
bull dinkie as well...no where on CraigsList are there more moochers than in the writing
section....
IF YOU CAN'T AFFORD A WRITER, YOU CANNOT AFFORD TO BE IN A WRITING RELATED BUSINESS.
Do not, young writers, write for free unless it serves you own personal writing goals as writing
for some of these Bozos ( most of them) can ruin your reputation for good. THEN WHAT?
I didn't make this information up-it comes the Idiots Guide to Professional Blogging...what
ever you write today may bite you tomorrow.
Do these people go to the supermarket and ask for free food?
Do their landlords give them free rent?
But they want writers to edit, write, etc for ZERO
Get lost, okay....FLAG EM
Location: deadbeat city-POST IN VOLUNTEER
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
Compensation: no pay
PostingID: 3144786649
The only free writing I do is for myself. Whether to increase my public persona, vent or expose people to something new that begs to be in their radar, I make those decisions on my own.
I also get to work on my schedule, not anyone else's & retain some creative control. If I didn't get that, what on Earth would be the point? I did a book review for NYCLA that's going to be published soon. It was through my choice & at my husband's suggestion. Plus, it's on a book that I felt the legal community should be exposed to since how many people do we have who hate their law firm jobs, other lawyers or any variation of those? Lots.
I also like to see things that aren't your typical bland, boring or stuffy content that gets characterized as being "for lawyers." I sure don't fit those things myself so if no one else is going to step up, I guess it's up to me to inject the controversy.
Considering I've gotten paid to write (and done lots of different styles of writing) plus was told I'm talented by people who actually know what they're talking about, I won't work for free. I also get offended by resume/cover letter ads asking people to write them for $25. Please! I'm a business professional & a licensed advocate. Getting a letter from me is at least $100 for an hour considering the high praise my letters have generated & my knowing what it's like to be an interviewer. Give your $25 to your best buddy, not some stranger on Craig's List.
Here's another choice ad:
STOP Asking for Free Graphic Work (Your Black Soul)
Date: 2012-07-24, 1:04PM EDT
Reply to: msjdm-3159986449@gigs.craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Unless you are a BONA FIDE non-profit who is looking for someone that believes in your cause, just STOP asking for free graphic design/motion work. And you, designers, just STOP enabling these fuckers by DOING THEIR WORK for alleged "film credit!" It's bogus and you all know it. And spare me the "Hey, Man, we're all about community and creativity and spreading the love and getting experience and there's gonna be TONS more work down the road and blah fucking blah." Please. The only one being helped is yourself. For fucking free. Just. Stop.
Oh yeah, Ryan Gossling is a prick.
Location: Your Black Soul
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
Compensation: no pay
PostingID: 3159986449
I agree with this sentiment. The art director at my company is highly talented & highly respected. We don't waste her time with bullshit since that's just disrespectful.
Now if you have no $ to pay anyone & you offer deferred pay plus expenses or equity, that's one thing. At least don't make it a loss for people working with you. Deferred pay or equity tells me that even if you don't have the money today, you're not going to dick me if you do make something from the project. Outright freebies, however? Totally a dick move.
If you want to be a legitimate company & get respect from people, don't do it. You will be known as those cheapskate assholes who exploit creatives. People talk & you could easily get blacklisted if you mess with folk.
Plus, I just don't trust anyone offering future work unless they're going to put that in writing. No writing = go fuck yourself. Professionals aren't stupid & anyone with a brain respects people for protecting themselves. Anyone getting nasty about the presence of lawyers, agents, managers, contracts, etc. is an obvious scam artist & you will get screwed over. Don't say you weren't warned. Even friends & family who are professionals take care of formalities when it comes to their business.
As for Ryan Gosling being a prick, I have no personal knowledge on that one. However, if he were a prick to me he'd not get to work with my company & I would be spreading the word. My husband would also kill him or make him wish he was dead if he tried to bother me in a sexual manner.
This last ad, though is the fulfillment of what I've warned employers about for posting ads for illegal internships. Read here:
PAID INTERNSHIP? (Midtown)
Date: 2012-08-09, 10:56PM EDT
Reply to: qdxvh-3195676900@job.craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
We are currently seeking past or current interns for a possible lawsuit against employers. Increasingly, greedy companies are using "interns" to avoid hiring entry-level employees. According to the US Department of Labor, this is illegal.
Several lawsuits are now challenging the legality of unpaid internships.
These include suits against prominent media companies such as Fox Searchlight and PBS.
If you feel that your place of work has abused your status as an intern or student, you may be entitled to compensation. If, as an "intern," you were required to work full-time, or for long periods, without pay, contact us immediately. You may have a claim, even if you received school credit. You may be entitled to compensation even for work that you have performed 4-6 years ago.
If you do the work, you should get paid. With our help, you can fight back for lost pay and overtime.
For a confidential consultation with an attorney, please email us.
Compensation: To Be Determined
Principals only. Recruiters, please don't contact this job poster.
Please, no phone calls about this job!
Please do not contact job poster about other services, products or commercial interests.
PostingID: 3195676900
I'm proud to see someone doing this. I hope it's legit since that would make this one of the most awesome law firms ever. If you've previous entries on ads I responded to that offered illegal internships & how shitty the circumstances were, you know I've said stuff about knowing they didn't have an attorney around & that they were going to eventually be sued.
Looks like there's an attorney working on that. I love it! I'm tempted to contact this firm & tell them of their awesomeness; I hope this ad is still up on Craig's List. Maybe they should read some of the ads I've seen & the dressing down I've done of people doing that shit.
I wonder if they're exclusively going after entertainment/creative companies or if they're also going to go after the law firms offering this bullshit. I hope they smack down the law firms I've seen doing it; that would tickle me & make me laugh at some folks' misfortune (and some people truly deserve it).
So, fuckers with an entitlement complex: perhaps this firm will sue your sorry ass for expecting people to be your slaves. I hope other firms will follow suit since this is a prime example of "serving the public" and all those high lawyer ideals we're supposed to (in theory at least) be living up to. Bravo to these folks! Glad to see I'm not the only one who finds that stuff offensive & has high standards. This also makes me feel vindicated when I've been strict on how the internships are structured in my company & how folks are treated.
The first is that for now, things are working out on my husband's job front. Maybe someone did their homework on me or realized that maybe it wasn't a good idea to start triggering angry natural redhead lawyer wrath so they'd better not transfer him to some hellhole area & invite trouble. So that whole being spared from falling trees on Amtrak turned out to indeed be a sign that the situation would be resolved.
The second is that people are fighting back against shitty job ads on Craig's List. I swear I didn't write any of these but I kind of wish I had, especially the last one.
Here's the first ad that begged to be shared on free writing services:
WHAT? Looking for Free Editing (deadbeat city-POST IN VOLUNTEER)
Date: 2012-07-17, 10:17AM EDT
Reply to: 4m7xg-3144786649@gigs.craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
listen, who ever you are, this is a JOB BOARD where people are seeking to EARN MONEY to live on.............
You seek a volunteer not a professional writer...get it....PROFESSIONALS=GETS $$$$. The avg cost of a good freelance
writer is at least $25 an hour. Can't afford it? Well guess what, you can't have a website based business unless you write
it yourself...can't write? OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, then you can't have a website related business.
THAT'S LIFE
I wish you people who are looking for jobs would flag people like this and most of the intern
bull dinkie as well...no where on CraigsList are there more moochers than in the writing
section....
IF YOU CAN'T AFFORD A WRITER, YOU CANNOT AFFORD TO BE IN A WRITING RELATED BUSINESS.
Do not, young writers, write for free unless it serves you own personal writing goals as writing
for some of these Bozos ( most of them) can ruin your reputation for good. THEN WHAT?
I didn't make this information up-it comes the Idiots Guide to Professional Blogging...what
ever you write today may bite you tomorrow.
Do these people go to the supermarket and ask for free food?
Do their landlords give them free rent?
But they want writers to edit, write, etc for ZERO
Get lost, okay....FLAG EM
Location: deadbeat city-POST IN VOLUNTEER
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
Compensation: no pay
PostingID: 3144786649
The only free writing I do is for myself. Whether to increase my public persona, vent or expose people to something new that begs to be in their radar, I make those decisions on my own.
I also get to work on my schedule, not anyone else's & retain some creative control. If I didn't get that, what on Earth would be the point? I did a book review for NYCLA that's going to be published soon. It was through my choice & at my husband's suggestion. Plus, it's on a book that I felt the legal community should be exposed to since how many people do we have who hate their law firm jobs, other lawyers or any variation of those? Lots.
I also like to see things that aren't your typical bland, boring or stuffy content that gets characterized as being "for lawyers." I sure don't fit those things myself so if no one else is going to step up, I guess it's up to me to inject the controversy.
Considering I've gotten paid to write (and done lots of different styles of writing) plus was told I'm talented by people who actually know what they're talking about, I won't work for free. I also get offended by resume/cover letter ads asking people to write them for $25. Please! I'm a business professional & a licensed advocate. Getting a letter from me is at least $100 for an hour considering the high praise my letters have generated & my knowing what it's like to be an interviewer. Give your $25 to your best buddy, not some stranger on Craig's List.
Here's another choice ad:
STOP Asking for Free Graphic Work (Your Black Soul)
Date: 2012-07-24, 1:04PM EDT
Reply to: msjdm-3159986449@gigs.craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Unless you are a BONA FIDE non-profit who is looking for someone that believes in your cause, just STOP asking for free graphic design/motion work. And you, designers, just STOP enabling these fuckers by DOING THEIR WORK for alleged "film credit!" It's bogus and you all know it. And spare me the "Hey, Man, we're all about community and creativity and spreading the love and getting experience and there's gonna be TONS more work down the road and blah fucking blah." Please. The only one being helped is yourself. For fucking free. Just. Stop.
Oh yeah, Ryan Gossling is a prick.
Location: Your Black Soul
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
Compensation: no pay
PostingID: 3159986449
I agree with this sentiment. The art director at my company is highly talented & highly respected. We don't waste her time with bullshit since that's just disrespectful.
Now if you have no $ to pay anyone & you offer deferred pay plus expenses or equity, that's one thing. At least don't make it a loss for people working with you. Deferred pay or equity tells me that even if you don't have the money today, you're not going to dick me if you do make something from the project. Outright freebies, however? Totally a dick move.
If you want to be a legitimate company & get respect from people, don't do it. You will be known as those cheapskate assholes who exploit creatives. People talk & you could easily get blacklisted if you mess with folk.
Plus, I just don't trust anyone offering future work unless they're going to put that in writing. No writing = go fuck yourself. Professionals aren't stupid & anyone with a brain respects people for protecting themselves. Anyone getting nasty about the presence of lawyers, agents, managers, contracts, etc. is an obvious scam artist & you will get screwed over. Don't say you weren't warned. Even friends & family who are professionals take care of formalities when it comes to their business.
As for Ryan Gosling being a prick, I have no personal knowledge on that one. However, if he were a prick to me he'd not get to work with my company & I would be spreading the word. My husband would also kill him or make him wish he was dead if he tried to bother me in a sexual manner.
This last ad, though is the fulfillment of what I've warned employers about for posting ads for illegal internships. Read here:
PAID INTERNSHIP? (Midtown)
Date: 2012-08-09, 10:56PM EDT
Reply to: qdxvh-3195676900@job.craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
We are currently seeking past or current interns for a possible lawsuit against employers. Increasingly, greedy companies are using "interns" to avoid hiring entry-level employees. According to the US Department of Labor, this is illegal.
Several lawsuits are now challenging the legality of unpaid internships.
These include suits against prominent media companies such as Fox Searchlight and PBS.
If you feel that your place of work has abused your status as an intern or student, you may be entitled to compensation. If, as an "intern," you were required to work full-time, or for long periods, without pay, contact us immediately. You may have a claim, even if you received school credit. You may be entitled to compensation even for work that you have performed 4-6 years ago.
If you do the work, you should get paid. With our help, you can fight back for lost pay and overtime.
For a confidential consultation with an attorney, please email us.
Compensation: To Be Determined
Principals only. Recruiters, please don't contact this job poster.
Please, no phone calls about this job!
Please do not contact job poster about other services, products or commercial interests.
PostingID: 3195676900
I'm proud to see someone doing this. I hope it's legit since that would make this one of the most awesome law firms ever. If you've previous entries on ads I responded to that offered illegal internships & how shitty the circumstances were, you know I've said stuff about knowing they didn't have an attorney around & that they were going to eventually be sued.
Looks like there's an attorney working on that. I love it! I'm tempted to contact this firm & tell them of their awesomeness; I hope this ad is still up on Craig's List. Maybe they should read some of the ads I've seen & the dressing down I've done of people doing that shit.
I wonder if they're exclusively going after entertainment/creative companies or if they're also going to go after the law firms offering this bullshit. I hope they smack down the law firms I've seen doing it; that would tickle me & make me laugh at some folks' misfortune (and some people truly deserve it).
So, fuckers with an entitlement complex: perhaps this firm will sue your sorry ass for expecting people to be your slaves. I hope other firms will follow suit since this is a prime example of "serving the public" and all those high lawyer ideals we're supposed to (in theory at least) be living up to. Bravo to these folks! Glad to see I'm not the only one who finds that stuff offensive & has high standards. This also makes me feel vindicated when I've been strict on how the internships are structured in my company & how folks are treated.
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
The Wedding Saga Part 2
So on Day 2 of this vacation, I went to my sister's bridal shower. They'd originally planned to have it the day before while we'd be on the road but for whatever scheduling reasons that came up, they decided to have it the next day. Sadly, my husband didn't get to go to the bachelor party the day before we arrived but he's not big on the whole strip club thing so it was fine.
Do you have a sister? Know someone who has a sister? If you do, then you know that sisters always fight about something. Especially if those sisters are close in age, too similar or different from one another or natural redheads. If you are a sister, you always think your parents and everyone else likes your sister more than you. I'm no exception.
In my case, I feel people favor my sister because she's a social butterfly, a traditionalist and has kids. She feels our family favors me because I'm the smart kid who became a lawyer, live in NYC and have always been the pretty one. We have all three of those "especially" factors (here, it's being too different from one another).
One thing you do not do, under any circumstances, is cause problems between sisters. This is downright stupid since that relationship is already volatile to begin with. My husband, whose mother has many sisters & has seen those relationships firsthand, knows better than to get in the middle.
Inevitably when I see my family members & especially my sister, it's not a matter of if but when I'll get into a big fight with them. On this trip, it was 20 hours & right after this bridal shower as we were going home.
Here's what happened:
We got to the location, a chain restaurant in the area. It's a grade B. Not just a grade B, mind you but it recently obtained a numeric score of 80.
So this isn't even a little bit of a B but a B verging onto a C. In my area, grade Cs were reserved for restaurants that had sewage problems. Makes you real hungry, doesn't it?
I pointed this out to my mother, who avoids grade B restaurants like the plague (in fact, we've walked out of a few in the past). Unfortunately, when someone else is throwing the event, you're obligated to stay.
To top it off, I had to deal with that matron of honor I mentioned. She's a familiar face if you've been reading this blog; she's the same one who basically lost her mind & did a personality 180. Before this trip, she assures me that she's heading down the right road again, will be standing up & doing SOME matron of honor duties, etc. I'd told her that we may still be able to be friends but not in the BFF sort of way that we were in the past; she also assures me that she doesn't value my sister more. I also neglected to mention that she lists my sister as one of her "bests" on Facebook but did not have me listed that way. Need I say more? These facts become relevant soon.
She arrives 40 minutes late, behind everyone else. I do my best to avoid talking to her, a theme throughout this trip. My sister loudly talks about how she stole this particular friend from me and basically caused me to get the short end of the stick all the time as a kid, including stealing gum from me that I paid for. I do a little mentioning of my own about her being a snoop (intended to be humorous & continuing on a theme she started). This triggers the big fight.
One note about my sister: she's FAR more worried about other people's opinions than I am. This includes people who know her well and know darn well she's not an actual thief or snoop. She accuses me of calling her one & making her look bad in front of these people. In fact, that attribute is a trend in my family: my mother worried about the opinions of her former neighbors, whom she didn't even like!
While we were at this restaurant, we find that one of our servers is a cousin we'd not seen since elementary school. Completely shocked at all this, we start chatting with her and learn that one of my uncles died a couple years back. The catching up was fun and I hope she'll stay in touch. She's one of the few younger relatives I have who doesn't have kids. Of course, I have to deliver that caveat about not wanting to be asked for favors.
Speaking of my sister & asking for favors, she claimed that no one wants what I have & I have no business issuing that caveat to people in conversation. I told her that she knows nothing about the entertainment industry & doesn't have a clue what it's like so she shouldn't speak about it. I also said I don't want someone to ask me for a favor & then pull the "but I thought we were FRIENDS" card. Better to nip any kind of BS in the bud before it can happen. After all, I then have a right to get mad & say crude things if someone does that.
The recent Aspiring Filmmaker's Bootcamp I went to before leaving town confirmed that I've got every right to be paranoid and suspicious since there are LOTS of crazies out there + many people willing to exploit your friendship w/them to meet celebrities, ask for professional favors, etc. It confirmed that I and my colleagues will face even more than we already have.
At this point, though I feel it's my film company or bust since I really don't care about anyone else's business & could never have the same level of passion I have for my own. Just a reality. My husband also told me I couldn't get a steady day job b/c I'm a genius & too smart to take bureaucracy + other BS; I disagree w/the genius part but that's a topic for debate.
Do you have a sister? Know someone who has a sister? If you do, then you know that sisters always fight about something. Especially if those sisters are close in age, too similar or different from one another or natural redheads. If you are a sister, you always think your parents and everyone else likes your sister more than you. I'm no exception.
In my case, I feel people favor my sister because she's a social butterfly, a traditionalist and has kids. She feels our family favors me because I'm the smart kid who became a lawyer, live in NYC and have always been the pretty one. We have all three of those "especially" factors (here, it's being too different from one another).
One thing you do not do, under any circumstances, is cause problems between sisters. This is downright stupid since that relationship is already volatile to begin with. My husband, whose mother has many sisters & has seen those relationships firsthand, knows better than to get in the middle.
Inevitably when I see my family members & especially my sister, it's not a matter of if but when I'll get into a big fight with them. On this trip, it was 20 hours & right after this bridal shower as we were going home.
Here's what happened:
We got to the location, a chain restaurant in the area. It's a grade B. Not just a grade B, mind you but it recently obtained a numeric score of 80.
So this isn't even a little bit of a B but a B verging onto a C. In my area, grade Cs were reserved for restaurants that had sewage problems. Makes you real hungry, doesn't it?
I pointed this out to my mother, who avoids grade B restaurants like the plague (in fact, we've walked out of a few in the past). Unfortunately, when someone else is throwing the event, you're obligated to stay.
To top it off, I had to deal with that matron of honor I mentioned. She's a familiar face if you've been reading this blog; she's the same one who basically lost her mind & did a personality 180. Before this trip, she assures me that she's heading down the right road again, will be standing up & doing SOME matron of honor duties, etc. I'd told her that we may still be able to be friends but not in the BFF sort of way that we were in the past; she also assures me that she doesn't value my sister more. I also neglected to mention that she lists my sister as one of her "bests" on Facebook but did not have me listed that way. Need I say more? These facts become relevant soon.
She arrives 40 minutes late, behind everyone else. I do my best to avoid talking to her, a theme throughout this trip. My sister loudly talks about how she stole this particular friend from me and basically caused me to get the short end of the stick all the time as a kid, including stealing gum from me that I paid for. I do a little mentioning of my own about her being a snoop (intended to be humorous & continuing on a theme she started). This triggers the big fight.
One note about my sister: she's FAR more worried about other people's opinions than I am. This includes people who know her well and know darn well she's not an actual thief or snoop. She accuses me of calling her one & making her look bad in front of these people. In fact, that attribute is a trend in my family: my mother worried about the opinions of her former neighbors, whom she didn't even like!
While we were at this restaurant, we find that one of our servers is a cousin we'd not seen since elementary school. Completely shocked at all this, we start chatting with her and learn that one of my uncles died a couple years back. The catching up was fun and I hope she'll stay in touch. She's one of the few younger relatives I have who doesn't have kids. Of course, I have to deliver that caveat about not wanting to be asked for favors.
Speaking of my sister & asking for favors, she claimed that no one wants what I have & I have no business issuing that caveat to people in conversation. I told her that she knows nothing about the entertainment industry & doesn't have a clue what it's like so she shouldn't speak about it. I also said I don't want someone to ask me for a favor & then pull the "but I thought we were FRIENDS" card. Better to nip any kind of BS in the bud before it can happen. After all, I then have a right to get mad & say crude things if someone does that.
The recent Aspiring Filmmaker's Bootcamp I went to before leaving town confirmed that I've got every right to be paranoid and suspicious since there are LOTS of crazies out there + many people willing to exploit your friendship w/them to meet celebrities, ask for professional favors, etc. It confirmed that I and my colleagues will face even more than we already have.
At this point, though I feel it's my film company or bust since I really don't care about anyone else's business & could never have the same level of passion I have for my own. Just a reality. My husband also told me I couldn't get a steady day job b/c I'm a genius & too smart to take bureaucracy + other BS; I disagree w/the genius part but that's a topic for debate.
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