Growing up, my family didn't have the money to do things like fly to far off destinations for vacation. In fact, we didn't really have money to go on vacation. We were doing the staycation long before that term ever existed. For the record, I HATE the term "staycation"; it's just a fancy & very pretentious way to say you're too broke or have too stingy a work schedule to take a vacation.
So when we actually got to go anywhere later on (mostly due to my desire to look at schools for undergrad before spending time and money on applications), we would take a road trip.
Personally, I love road trips though you have to do them right. You don't want to travel with anyone who has to stop every 5 seconds to use the bathroom or without clearly established rules on music, driving labor, food, etc. Nor do you want to travel with anyone who's going to deviate from the pre-established route like in the last episode of Nickelodeon's Doug. Go here for a reference to what I'm talking about. Believe me, if I'm driving there's no way in hell we're going out of the way like that. I don't care if Jesus and Santa Claus are appearing at the bug ranch & handing out bags of cash to everyone who shows up. Everyone I know who has driven or navigated road trips is the same way.
Now why are road trips so great? First off, if you take the right route (not overly scenic & not a massive toll plaza) you get a lot of room for exploration.
Second, they are a great test of a relationship. After a few hours, the veneer of politeness & reserve vanishes and you'll see people's true natures. Annoying personality quirks, crazy behavior, all that stuff comes out. Sometimes you're riding with the sleep deprived; just make sure they aren't the ones driving. I went on a road trip with my husband's family early in our relationship & I had the pleasure of dealing with the guy I was dating in a sleep deprived state. He gets looney & wacky. We were in the back seat. I think a road trip is much like an extended stay at the person's house; it will either tell you it's time to dump your significant other or that you should marry the person since you don't have the urge to kill him/her after it's all said & done. My husband was the first guy I spent an extended amount of time with & didn't want to kill after it was all over. If I couldn't handle being around him in a road trip, I wouldn't have married him since I'd have wanted to leave him at some restaurant in Fair Play, South Carolina (that is a real place where a family friend of ours once had car trouble when he was driving to Atlanta).
The same goes for friendships but I think going on a road trip that is at least 4-5 hours is a good test of a relationship since you'll either never want to see your significant other again or have overcome so much in the trip that you're bonded forever. I'd totally recommend doing that before ever getting married to someone. Flying, though it's a hassle, just isn't the same since you don't have to worry about anyone navigating or doing the driving. People in the car with you can actually screw that stuff up. If you can't stand being in a car with your significant other for at least 4 hours, you will never be able to live with him/her without being seriously tempted to commit murder.
Third, it's a bonding experience. You get shared experiences & stories about things you might never see at home. For instance, condom machines in the bathrooms were a big deal when we drove to Atlanta and stopped at gas stations in South Carolina to use the bathroom. There was also that weird gas station next to the video store my husband & I went to in Georgia when driving back from Florida. This place was legendary & it's something we know about but no one else would unless we told them (or they happened to get off that exit on 95). There's also being able to manage a crisis like bad weather or road closures. Those are always fun, especially if you don't have a GPS system or a phone app to help you reroute.
Again, that veneer of politeness comes down sooner or later so you're dealing with the real person; if you manage to travel with someone who can maintain that veneer for 10+ hours in a car (the distance to drive from NYC to my hometown in NC), that person should probably be awarded sainthood. There's no way a normal person could do that unless (s)he was asleep or passed out for at least half that time. Obviously, you don't get sainthood unless you were asleep or passed out for less than a couple hours of that 10+ hours.
Finally, you figure out your roles. Some of us are good drivers, some of us are awesome navigators, some are good at entertaining everyone even if there's no radio reception or great music to play. I think romantic relationships work better if you've got a good driver & a good navigator.
Another type of person you don't want in the car? A backseat driver. I discovered my husband was one when I had to drive part of the route to NC last Thanksgiving. As a rule, I always insist that the driver gets to play the music (s)he wants; after all, you don't want the driver getting into an accident or getting pissed off and doing stupid stuff that risks everyone's lives. I switched to my CDs. Having driven from Atlanta to NC many times by myself, I made sure to create a good mix of music for my CDs. In a 5 hour drive one way, you need to have some loud music with a beat so you don't cave in to being tired or have your trip last longer because you got drowsy and had to pull over. This is especially true if you're doing night driving, as I'd had to do pretty often.
My husband, a man who hadn't done that or even made late night drives to my home like I did to his when we dated & I was leaving from my last law school class on Thursday evenings to see him, even commented on that. Then, he yelled at me for doing 70 miles per hour in a 70 mile per hour speed zone. Considering my father taught me how to drive & he was extremely good at it, I got quite upset. I also consider driving semi-relaxing if I have the right music on. I view it as akin to mastering a dance routine. You have to make sure you have the right steps & if you misstep, that's when you have accidents. That analogy is probably how I'm able to drive in construction areas and narrow spaces instead of being terrified like I was when I was first learning.
I also come from a family that prides itself on not driving like arthritic grandmothers. My mother regularly complains about slow drivers & she lives out in the country. My husband's family is the opposite & I did tell him he was acting like his mother, who will do the same thing when my husband is driving.
It seems if you're married & a straight woman, your husband will insist on driving the entire 14 hour trip himself. My mom had this happen to her & it's happened to me. I've offered to drive & my husband usually tells me no. When we were coming back from Florida, he later complained to people about driving the entire way from Florida to North Carolina even though I offered to take over anytime he wanted me to.
Are all men that stubborn? I say don't bitch about driving once you've turned down someone's offer to give you a break. When I traveled with my family, we shared driving responsibilities so no one would feel like they drove the entire way all alone.
At least I'm a good navigator so my husband doing the driving works for us. It's got to be worse if you're a driver and your significant other can't navigate for shit. I was the one who got my family out of NYC and back to Nanuet without the benefit of GPS back in 2002. I figured out the direction we needed to go & used the One Way streets to get us back where we needed to be. Guess my driving in Atlanta helped there. I'm also the one everyone goes to when they got off the wrong exit and have to get back on the interstate.
As a rule, I never rely solely on GPS for directions. We always used MapQuest directions and would learn the routes enough to see where alternate ways might be easier. I still do that today, in fact since GPS wasn't part of my life experience until more recently and I feel like you don't really learn how to get someplace unless you have the directions on your own. Just relying on GPS makes you too mindless and doesn't really allow you to recognize landmarks, exit numbers and things that would help you acquaint yourself with a route. Suppose I'm also speaking partially as a former courier since I also got directions when needed while doing that job.
Though eating is more of a challenge on a road trip if you don't eat fast food or at most chain restaurants, I still enjoy road trips. If you're smart, you research where the restaurants are on the route. This is something I've done when going near restaurants I'd never get to eat at in NYC or even where I'm going to visit. Unlike in New York and New Jersey, there are signs along the interstate in the South that will tell you what's off a particular exit. Even then, though, you sometimes can find a place is hidden. I once found a Chick-Fil-A in my route that wasn't listed on one of these signs. I joke with my husband that up here, it's "If you don't know what's off this exit, then fuck you! We're not telling you. Figure it out yourself, jerk!"
Road trips also work better if you don't have young kids, a small bladder, a hatred of adventure & novelty or fears of other people driving. Those people make the road trip much longer or more horrendous in some way. Fortunately, I don't have any of that stuff so I'm much more apt to go on one if given an opportunity. Being able to entertain yourself also helps sometimes. I also don't get car sick so I'm probably the perfect road trip companion if I've had enough sleep. I like evening trips better. Not sure why, I just do.
However, I'm not sure if you could call me a morning or a night person since my sleep schedule has varied so many times over the years that I didn't feel a difference when I was used to whatever schedule I had to follow at the time for work or school. As long as we're not leaving at 6 am & I have to drive first, I'm fine.
Man, I miss going on road trips. We're going to have to go someplace where we can do a road trip. I wouldn't mind doing one cross country as long as the proper planning happened & I got to travel with people I didn't want to strangle. I also wondered when someone mentioned a need for the means to have one to an event she was trying to get to whether there's a company that does that for you. Hires people to go on a road trip with you or use their car to make it happen? I think that kind of company would be interesting, don't you? Screen out the people so you don't get whiners and backseat drivers. If you could make it happen, I think it would be cool.
Showing posts with label driving. Show all posts
Showing posts with label driving. Show all posts
Monday, July 1, 2013
Saturday, November 19, 2011
How to Get Shot By a Stranger: My Continuing Venom for Most SUV Drivers in the 'Burbs
Having gotten my driver's license in college and spending more of that time driving in Atlanta (a major city), I'll admit to having some road rage. In fact, my entire family has a degree of road rage. See, unlike many people of their age, my parents do not drive "like Maw Maw & Pap Paw." They HATE people who drive like that on the roads! Hell, my father is a former truck driver & owned a black Camaro. He's also the one who ended up teaching me how to drive after I felt it was impossible & had a fear of doing it.
My sister also ended up getting in numerous car accidents as a teen (including a near total of her new car when I was a senior & her front seat passenger, weeks before the prom; luckily, we were not injured as if the car that hit us had been going much faster, we could have crashed into a nearby power pole). Her driving scared the Hell out of me when we were younger but now, she still doesn't play around & will freely curse out the slow drivers. She doesn't drive like anybody's fat, old, harpy, bitchy soccer mom!! If you lumped her into that category, she'd probably hurt you (she's also a natural redhead & we're all nuts, remember). Oh, and she's got a yellow Mustang since like my father, she likes a car that has "guts".
So, while I do admit to having road rage & that my family does have lead feet at least we will not be the people doing 30 mph on a busy interstate unless there's a damn good reason for it (weather, construction or the traffic in front of us). These are the people other drivers want to kill, especially when they have things to do & there's no reason for it.
Oh, and if you are a man who drives like this? You will NOT pick up women that way!!! You will not impress young chicks & all you will succeed in doing is pissing off the rest of the motorists. Take it from an industry certified hottie. We are also mindful of cops and seek to drive with traffic instead of causing jams & bottlenecks.
This is contrary to the aim of many drivers I see in areas outside of major cities, where you will be gutted like a fish if you cause traffic problems. City cops may even join in if they're not too busy raiding peaceful protests.
Today, my husband & I were traveling to Long Island. He was driving, as he normally does, and we were getting off an exit from one busy parkway to a busy highway. The particular highway we were trying to merge onto was a particularly busy section where cars travel at least 40 mph. Behind my husband is a moron driving a silver SUV.*
* Let me pause this story for a moment to share my feelings on SUV drivers. On the whole, I fucking HATE them. Unless you have a large family, own a business where you have to carry lots of things like a construction company & most importantly, know how to drive one, you've got no business having one. The location issue is irrelevant where I live. I don't mind sitting in them but I would hate driving one since they guzzle gasoline (isn't it high enough?), you can't see well in them & most people can't park them to save their lives (that was said by an ex of mine who owned an SUV; however, he had a painting company & kids so he did have justification to own one). You can't see around them in traffic & I just hate to see them coming. I also agree that it seems many drivers have these vehicles to compensate for a very small penis since they will zoom in them, blast high beams at you if you don't want to be their speed shields & generally behave like pricks on the road, especially in Long Island.
Getting back to the story, this moron nearly rear ends my husband then cuts in front of him. In the middle of this busy highway, the dumbass slows down. My husband tries to pass, figuring maybe he's just some clueless turd who doesn't know where he's going (as there are many in Long Island who will stop in the middle of the street & make no effort to pull over). Dumbass decides to weave in the lanes, slowing down all the while. We're wondering what in God's name is going on when all of a sudden, this idiot stops in the middle of Sunrise Highway! If you are familiar with NY driving, you can already see the absurdity of this.
Then, when you think this story can't get better, the driver comes out of the car and moves toward us. This is some little punk guy, no more than 25 if that. My husband reaches down, tells me to get my phone out (which I do since it's looking like it's time to call the cops on this douche) and I feel for some weapons to make this guy sorry if he dares to try anything.
All of a sudden, before getting too close to our car, the guy turns around, goes back to the car, starts it and continues on like nothing happened. He goes very slowly, heads over to the right hand lane (we were in the left lane & he's had to cross about 2 lanes to get where he goes), then turns off at the VERY FIRST right turn at a major intersection.
I'm watching this guy like a hawk as this goes on because I'm not going to be followed and then harmed.
I wasn't aware of it at the time but my husband said he reached down to make the guy think he was getting a weapon like a gun. He thinks someone was in the SUV & yelled some sense into this hothead so he'd back off. With that quick turning, you have to wonder if this guy may have thought we'd take action.
The answer: hell yes!! Believe it or not, I'm not the sort of person who starts things. As my mom says "Don't start nothing, won't be nothing." My husband is the same way. He was merely trying to merge onto the highway, not tailgating this guy or doing something anyone would consider antagonistic.
But if you fuck with me or my family, you will get yours & I will not be responsible for what happens.
Furthermore, if I ever saw someone even leave a scratch on my spouse, that person would be dead in a heartbeat. My life would no longer have value to me if he was killed or got hurt. No gun or anything would phase me at that point; you could call it the same kind of reaction I had when I saw my ex-friend's husband kick that cat carrier. That fucker would be praying for the police to show up because let me tell you, you don't do that to someone's true love if you don't want to have your nuts chopped off & fed to you or something equally grotesque/scary/disturbing happening.
Especially when that person is already off mentally (you can make this argument for most creative people) & knows they've got no chance at finding anyone who could top that relationship. I would be warning any police officer on that scene that they're going to need to restrain me because I will murder such a person with my bare hands out of uncontrolled rage. If that person fled, it would become my mission to hunt him/her down like a dog & take care of that for my own soul.
I'm sure you'd see empty, soulless eyes if you ever did something like that to us. No one messes w/my man & I know he feels the same about me.
This is why for all my strong views and my "enforcer" cred, I really don't get into fights or conflicts very much. If I have to resort to physical violence, it's going to be one of those "We're taking this to the woodshed & one of us isn't coming back" moments. If I take on any endeavor, it's going to be done right or not at all.
Now if you think I sound scary without even having a gun, imagine how many people on the planet may feel just like me & have far fewer pro-social impulses to obey the law or even basic regard for human beings. Might you want to consider that some person in a car might have a loaded weapon and shoot first, thinking you're going to harm them? Or even just shoot you in rage? I've read & heard enough stories about shootings over parking spaces in mall parking lots to know better than to go approach a stranger like that.
I would dare any law enforcement officer to punish a driver in my husband's situation if (s)he shot or killed someone in the position of this random asshole who stopped in the middle of the highway for no good reason & then got out of his car to approach him/her. I don't recall a law that says potential crime victims have to sit there & take it + I think if it happened, that person would end up like Bernard Goetz (hopefully without the racism aspect though I think an asshole is an asshole is an asshole). I would want to help that person find a good lawyer.
By the way, today's shithead was white. I predict he won't be living much longer if he keeps that up.
I also find it ironic that this happened in Long Island, an area where many people live in fear of the "big, scary city" that is Queens, Manhattan, Brooklyn & the Bronx (maybe you can get Long Islanders to go to Staten Island since Staten Island is more suburban than the rest of the boroughs, I don't know). Getting some Long Islanders into NYC is literally like pulling teeth. In fact, those people will swear to you that Long Island is a safe place while NYC is a bastion of crime, violence & in short, a hellhole. Never mind some of the more grizzly crimes that have happened in Long Island, especially recently.
These are the people I think should be trading places with people in the Midwest, the South and other smaller regions where people there would go to NYC all the time if they lived in Long Island but don't have the means to get there. The skittish Long Islanders are wasted living there & should be living in the middle of nowhere or in smaller towns since they'd benefit more from it in my view. I'd have killed for this kind of exchange myself as a North Carolinian who didn't even get to visit NYC until college.
This furthers my belief that Long Island drivers in SUVs are assholes. Now we can add "morons who want to die or serve jail time" to that list. We were about to call the cops but didn't get the plate # & the person didn't follow us so we considered it a win.
My sister also ended up getting in numerous car accidents as a teen (including a near total of her new car when I was a senior & her front seat passenger, weeks before the prom; luckily, we were not injured as if the car that hit us had been going much faster, we could have crashed into a nearby power pole). Her driving scared the Hell out of me when we were younger but now, she still doesn't play around & will freely curse out the slow drivers. She doesn't drive like anybody's fat, old, harpy, bitchy soccer mom!! If you lumped her into that category, she'd probably hurt you (she's also a natural redhead & we're all nuts, remember). Oh, and she's got a yellow Mustang since like my father, she likes a car that has "guts".
So, while I do admit to having road rage & that my family does have lead feet at least we will not be the people doing 30 mph on a busy interstate unless there's a damn good reason for it (weather, construction or the traffic in front of us). These are the people other drivers want to kill, especially when they have things to do & there's no reason for it.
Oh, and if you are a man who drives like this? You will NOT pick up women that way!!! You will not impress young chicks & all you will succeed in doing is pissing off the rest of the motorists. Take it from an industry certified hottie. We are also mindful of cops and seek to drive with traffic instead of causing jams & bottlenecks.
This is contrary to the aim of many drivers I see in areas outside of major cities, where you will be gutted like a fish if you cause traffic problems. City cops may even join in if they're not too busy raiding peaceful protests.
Today, my husband & I were traveling to Long Island. He was driving, as he normally does, and we were getting off an exit from one busy parkway to a busy highway. The particular highway we were trying to merge onto was a particularly busy section where cars travel at least 40 mph. Behind my husband is a moron driving a silver SUV.*
* Let me pause this story for a moment to share my feelings on SUV drivers. On the whole, I fucking HATE them. Unless you have a large family, own a business where you have to carry lots of things like a construction company & most importantly, know how to drive one, you've got no business having one. The location issue is irrelevant where I live. I don't mind sitting in them but I would hate driving one since they guzzle gasoline (isn't it high enough?), you can't see well in them & most people can't park them to save their lives (that was said by an ex of mine who owned an SUV; however, he had a painting company & kids so he did have justification to own one). You can't see around them in traffic & I just hate to see them coming. I also agree that it seems many drivers have these vehicles to compensate for a very small penis since they will zoom in them, blast high beams at you if you don't want to be their speed shields & generally behave like pricks on the road, especially in Long Island.
Getting back to the story, this moron nearly rear ends my husband then cuts in front of him. In the middle of this busy highway, the dumbass slows down. My husband tries to pass, figuring maybe he's just some clueless turd who doesn't know where he's going (as there are many in Long Island who will stop in the middle of the street & make no effort to pull over). Dumbass decides to weave in the lanes, slowing down all the while. We're wondering what in God's name is going on when all of a sudden, this idiot stops in the middle of Sunrise Highway! If you are familiar with NY driving, you can already see the absurdity of this.
Then, when you think this story can't get better, the driver comes out of the car and moves toward us. This is some little punk guy, no more than 25 if that. My husband reaches down, tells me to get my phone out (which I do since it's looking like it's time to call the cops on this douche) and I feel for some weapons to make this guy sorry if he dares to try anything.
All of a sudden, before getting too close to our car, the guy turns around, goes back to the car, starts it and continues on like nothing happened. He goes very slowly, heads over to the right hand lane (we were in the left lane & he's had to cross about 2 lanes to get where he goes), then turns off at the VERY FIRST right turn at a major intersection.
I'm watching this guy like a hawk as this goes on because I'm not going to be followed and then harmed.
I wasn't aware of it at the time but my husband said he reached down to make the guy think he was getting a weapon like a gun. He thinks someone was in the SUV & yelled some sense into this hothead so he'd back off. With that quick turning, you have to wonder if this guy may have thought we'd take action.
The answer: hell yes!! Believe it or not, I'm not the sort of person who starts things. As my mom says "Don't start nothing, won't be nothing." My husband is the same way. He was merely trying to merge onto the highway, not tailgating this guy or doing something anyone would consider antagonistic.
But if you fuck with me or my family, you will get yours & I will not be responsible for what happens.
Furthermore, if I ever saw someone even leave a scratch on my spouse, that person would be dead in a heartbeat. My life would no longer have value to me if he was killed or got hurt. No gun or anything would phase me at that point; you could call it the same kind of reaction I had when I saw my ex-friend's husband kick that cat carrier. That fucker would be praying for the police to show up because let me tell you, you don't do that to someone's true love if you don't want to have your nuts chopped off & fed to you or something equally grotesque/scary/disturbing happening.
Especially when that person is already off mentally (you can make this argument for most creative people) & knows they've got no chance at finding anyone who could top that relationship. I would be warning any police officer on that scene that they're going to need to restrain me because I will murder such a person with my bare hands out of uncontrolled rage. If that person fled, it would become my mission to hunt him/her down like a dog & take care of that for my own soul.
I'm sure you'd see empty, soulless eyes if you ever did something like that to us. No one messes w/my man & I know he feels the same about me.
This is why for all my strong views and my "enforcer" cred, I really don't get into fights or conflicts very much. If I have to resort to physical violence, it's going to be one of those "We're taking this to the woodshed & one of us isn't coming back" moments. If I take on any endeavor, it's going to be done right or not at all.
Now if you think I sound scary without even having a gun, imagine how many people on the planet may feel just like me & have far fewer pro-social impulses to obey the law or even basic regard for human beings. Might you want to consider that some person in a car might have a loaded weapon and shoot first, thinking you're going to harm them? Or even just shoot you in rage? I've read & heard enough stories about shootings over parking spaces in mall parking lots to know better than to go approach a stranger like that.
I would dare any law enforcement officer to punish a driver in my husband's situation if (s)he shot or killed someone in the position of this random asshole who stopped in the middle of the highway for no good reason & then got out of his car to approach him/her. I don't recall a law that says potential crime victims have to sit there & take it + I think if it happened, that person would end up like Bernard Goetz (hopefully without the racism aspect though I think an asshole is an asshole is an asshole). I would want to help that person find a good lawyer.
By the way, today's shithead was white. I predict he won't be living much longer if he keeps that up.
I also find it ironic that this happened in Long Island, an area where many people live in fear of the "big, scary city" that is Queens, Manhattan, Brooklyn & the Bronx (maybe you can get Long Islanders to go to Staten Island since Staten Island is more suburban than the rest of the boroughs, I don't know). Getting some Long Islanders into NYC is literally like pulling teeth. In fact, those people will swear to you that Long Island is a safe place while NYC is a bastion of crime, violence & in short, a hellhole. Never mind some of the more grizzly crimes that have happened in Long Island, especially recently.
These are the people I think should be trading places with people in the Midwest, the South and other smaller regions where people there would go to NYC all the time if they lived in Long Island but don't have the means to get there. The skittish Long Islanders are wasted living there & should be living in the middle of nowhere or in smaller towns since they'd benefit more from it in my view. I'd have killed for this kind of exchange myself as a North Carolinian who didn't even get to visit NYC until college.
This furthers my belief that Long Island drivers in SUVs are assholes. Now we can add "morons who want to die or serve jail time" to that list. We were about to call the cops but didn't get the plate # & the person didn't follow us so we considered it a win.
Monday, May 30, 2011
The Wedding Saga Part 1
So, you may have noticed I didn't get to update this week. How come?
Well, I was out of town to be a matron of honor in my sister's wedding. Yes, you read right. A Matron of Honor. The second one is a now former childhood friend I've written about in the past. I don't believe in being friends with someone who is no longer the person you knew just because you've been friends for 20 years. To me, if a friendship is no longer enhancing you or making you better as a person it's time to cut ties and move on. Any family that respects you will also do its part by not forcing you to interact with the person or taking their side over yours in conflicts.
More on that in another installment, though. This is part one of the wedding saga. I call it a "saga" since that's what a formal wedding is. This one was no exception.
We drove 12 hours from NYC to NC. I love road trips since you get to know people very well on them.
I now realize that there's no way in Hell I'd ever be able to do a formal wedding unless I hired models to be my attendants. Here's why:
1. Models look great in everything. You don't have to worry about dress styles or colors if you select your models carefully. See last year's post on the great dress dispute for this. No one has to lose weight, wear lifts, etc. Your pics will also look fabulous.
2. You're paying for their time. No worries about resentful friends and family or people flaking out & being forced to tolerate their shit until the big day! Pay anyone enough money & they'll do right by you. Also helps if you aren't a total prick but generally, money will make one far more cooperative.
If there were a business of this, I think actors & actresses might like the side income. I'm not aware of one so enlighten me if there is such a thing in NYC.
3. You can hire as many people you want and keep the number of bridesmaids and groomsmen even. Therefore, those with few friends or whose friends are flakes can even out the ranks if one side has a ton of people and refuses to cut the numbers.
4. The groomsmen will be happy with the eye candy. Those hired women might also find more work as wingwomen or "dates" to get obnoxious family members off some poor guy's back. Consider the film She's Out of My League or in the case of men, Babycakes. Maybe gay people could use those services as well.
5. If you deal with an agency, you can get a replacement if someone gives you lip, refuses to do their share or otherwise is a problem. My sister put up with a lot of shit I would never have stood for. I'd have said "Fuck it, we're eloping!" by the time all was said & done since people generally annoy or piss me off enough to permit it.
Honestly, though I think decent money would motivate people to behave themselves and not get replaced.
So, that being said we go to the first event of this saga: the bachelorette party. This one was actually fun but only myself, the bride & a bridesmaid who was doing the bulk of matron of honor duties along with her mother were present. Grievances concerning the local matron of honor were plentiful & you'll get to read about them soon, I promise.
Anyhow, we went to a venue I'd not been to and it was playing a style of music that is definitely not my thing (country). Yes, I'm from NC but never cared for country. Nor did I ever have a Southern accent. This should provide some clues as to why I don't still live in the South. I wanted so badly to go to this 80's club in Charlotte and am still upset that I didn't get to go. My husband agreed to sign a contract that the next time we are in that area, we're going to that club come Hell or high water. But, I digress.
Despite the music not being my thing, I had a decent time. Even got on the mechanical bull since I'm a theatrical person by nature. A lot of firsts on this trip. The lead singer of the band even came up later & hugged my sister (who was decked out in her bride to be attire). Didn't have to fend off guys either. I usually have to, especially if I'm alone. You won't see me smile much if I'm out alone since I don't like guys even thinking I'm interested when I'm not. Going out where I don't have to be pestered about that is a great thing for me. If I can be seen as a fun person to talk to without the element of sex while I can still dress as great as I want, I'm a happy camper.
Another thing I think would be truly interesting: a wedding soundtrack of Prince songs (up to mid-90s or so). A lot of songs from Purple Rain would be the least appropriate wedding songs on Earth but you could put in "The Most Beautiful Girl in the World" for the bride coming down the aisle.
I'm not enough of a Prince fan to do it myself but I'd want to go to that wedding since I love a couple that doesn't take itself too seriously + shares my appreciation for the non-traditional. Bonus points if they use "Darling Nikki" or "Sex Shooter" by Apollonia 6, two totally unchaste songs. I'd be all for it, especially if I had to wear high heels. In case you can't tell, I did see Purple Rain not long before leaving for this wedding.
My dress had a very long hem so I had 4 inch silver heels. Really nice, though along with my super cute updo. I walked with confidence and awesomeness despite all the bullshit I had to deal with beforehand, including attempted copying of my hair by the other matron of honor.
I'm going to wear that style for future events when I have $ and know of a good hair place that will earn their rate for doing it. Me not having my hair down is truly unusual. I even took pics of it as a souvenir since who knows when it will happen again & I certainly can't do it myself.
Pics on some of this will be forthcoming, though none of the wedding since that's a personal thing. Fight totals will be posted in the second installment since it was shockingly shorter than I thought it would be.
Well, I was out of town to be a matron of honor in my sister's wedding. Yes, you read right. A Matron of Honor. The second one is a now former childhood friend I've written about in the past. I don't believe in being friends with someone who is no longer the person you knew just because you've been friends for 20 years. To me, if a friendship is no longer enhancing you or making you better as a person it's time to cut ties and move on. Any family that respects you will also do its part by not forcing you to interact with the person or taking their side over yours in conflicts.
More on that in another installment, though. This is part one of the wedding saga. I call it a "saga" since that's what a formal wedding is. This one was no exception.
We drove 12 hours from NYC to NC. I love road trips since you get to know people very well on them.
I now realize that there's no way in Hell I'd ever be able to do a formal wedding unless I hired models to be my attendants. Here's why:
1. Models look great in everything. You don't have to worry about dress styles or colors if you select your models carefully. See last year's post on the great dress dispute for this. No one has to lose weight, wear lifts, etc. Your pics will also look fabulous.
2. You're paying for their time. No worries about resentful friends and family or people flaking out & being forced to tolerate their shit until the big day! Pay anyone enough money & they'll do right by you. Also helps if you aren't a total prick but generally, money will make one far more cooperative.
If there were a business of this, I think actors & actresses might like the side income. I'm not aware of one so enlighten me if there is such a thing in NYC.
3. You can hire as many people you want and keep the number of bridesmaids and groomsmen even. Therefore, those with few friends or whose friends are flakes can even out the ranks if one side has a ton of people and refuses to cut the numbers.
4. The groomsmen will be happy with the eye candy. Those hired women might also find more work as wingwomen or "dates" to get obnoxious family members off some poor guy's back. Consider the film She's Out of My League or in the case of men, Babycakes. Maybe gay people could use those services as well.
5. If you deal with an agency, you can get a replacement if someone gives you lip, refuses to do their share or otherwise is a problem. My sister put up with a lot of shit I would never have stood for. I'd have said "Fuck it, we're eloping!" by the time all was said & done since people generally annoy or piss me off enough to permit it.
Honestly, though I think decent money would motivate people to behave themselves and not get replaced.
So, that being said we go to the first event of this saga: the bachelorette party. This one was actually fun but only myself, the bride & a bridesmaid who was doing the bulk of matron of honor duties along with her mother were present. Grievances concerning the local matron of honor were plentiful & you'll get to read about them soon, I promise.
Anyhow, we went to a venue I'd not been to and it was playing a style of music that is definitely not my thing (country). Yes, I'm from NC but never cared for country. Nor did I ever have a Southern accent. This should provide some clues as to why I don't still live in the South. I wanted so badly to go to this 80's club in Charlotte and am still upset that I didn't get to go. My husband agreed to sign a contract that the next time we are in that area, we're going to that club come Hell or high water. But, I digress.
Despite the music not being my thing, I had a decent time. Even got on the mechanical bull since I'm a theatrical person by nature. A lot of firsts on this trip. The lead singer of the band even came up later & hugged my sister (who was decked out in her bride to be attire). Didn't have to fend off guys either. I usually have to, especially if I'm alone. You won't see me smile much if I'm out alone since I don't like guys even thinking I'm interested when I'm not. Going out where I don't have to be pestered about that is a great thing for me. If I can be seen as a fun person to talk to without the element of sex while I can still dress as great as I want, I'm a happy camper.
Another thing I think would be truly interesting: a wedding soundtrack of Prince songs (up to mid-90s or so). A lot of songs from Purple Rain would be the least appropriate wedding songs on Earth but you could put in "The Most Beautiful Girl in the World" for the bride coming down the aisle.
I'm not enough of a Prince fan to do it myself but I'd want to go to that wedding since I love a couple that doesn't take itself too seriously + shares my appreciation for the non-traditional. Bonus points if they use "Darling Nikki" or "Sex Shooter" by Apollonia 6, two totally unchaste songs. I'd be all for it, especially if I had to wear high heels. In case you can't tell, I did see Purple Rain not long before leaving for this wedding.
My dress had a very long hem so I had 4 inch silver heels. Really nice, though along with my super cute updo. I walked with confidence and awesomeness despite all the bullshit I had to deal with beforehand, including attempted copying of my hair by the other matron of honor.
I'm going to wear that style for future events when I have $ and know of a good hair place that will earn their rate for doing it. Me not having my hair down is truly unusual. I even took pics of it as a souvenir since who knows when it will happen again & I certainly can't do it myself.
Pics on some of this will be forthcoming, though none of the wedding since that's a personal thing. Fight totals will be posted in the second installment since it was shockingly shorter than I thought it would be.
Friday, December 17, 2010
Extra Gig #2: Driving Through Brooklyn, Freezing My Butt Off & Another Nail in the Ugly Girl Coffin
While still waiting to hear about the job opportunity (as of this moment, I STILL haven't heard anything though as of yesterday they are still interested in talking to me & my calls have been returned when I wasn't around), I saw an extra gig seeking "attractive news reporters w/cars." Since my car was not one of the undesired colors or styles, I decided to submit myself for the sake of having something to do as well as getting exercise for my car.
* When the car battery dies if you don't run it for 2 days, you tend to get concerned about making sure it gets some movement. *
So, I get selected for this role. It requires me to drive 15 minutes from home into an area of Brooklyn that's fairly decent. This time, the show was Law & Order: SVU. If you see me there, again I'll be shocked. I haven't watched that one either, so this will be another instance where someone else tells me if I'm on there. Again, I was the only redhead & no one even came close to looking like me. There were also fewer people this time.
I would really like to find people living in my city who look enough like me to really pass for me (being a natural redhead w/my shade is a prime requirement); they would likely have the same problems I've had & might also like the idea of fooling folk by switching places.
In middle school, there was a redhead who wore her hair straight while I wore mine curly & longer. Her name also started w/an "M" and people were always mixing me up with her. This mistaken identity issue even came up years later when I was at the Senior Class Picnic & the DJ claimed I'd dated a guy that she dated. The guy was merely a friend of mine in middle school; seems he came out after high school but there was talk of him being gay in high school. I was like "That was the other girl, not me!" I'm sure there are still some things people will swear I did b/c rumors about me were so pervasive despite my trying to debunk them, I just played along after a while. Yes, I DID go w/that guy in middle school who never said a word to me & was popular while I was being harassed by the gossipy bitch girls!
If my middle school/high school life had been Hollywood, I was definitely a tabloid celebrity. I had to deal w/most of the same people so I didn't really get much of a chance at reinvention.
So, here's how experience #2 went (no episode secrets will be revealed):
A) When I went to the parking area before my call time, there was NO parking + I could not get to the street I needed to be on. I called up Central Casting to tell them about this. They alerted the powers that be. Eventually I did get to a spot & made it inside, though a little late.
I did apologize for my lateness & apparently many people had that particular problem. The on-set reps handling check-ins were very understanding. More examples of the professionalism I like to see.
B) I saw yet another actor from the whole previous TV network scam. Not just any actor, though. This was the infamous one who irritated people & pissed them off. Apparently, this individual also ticked off someone I know from another sphere.
I'll give this individual a few things though: I won't hear about this person sleeping w/anyone to get to the top or putting more importance on background work than needed. This person also took my advice & got an entertainment lawyer to help her. I do have slightly more respect for her than I did previously.
Why do I keep seeing people who know me from that on these gigs? Killing my whole mission here.
C) I decide to bring in my heels that I normally wear w/business suits, closed toe & very corporate looking.
Unfortunately, the front of my feet were only separated from the windy, cold weather in shooting with pantyhose (you'd have seen my tights). I was outside a good chunk of time & had to run for my role. My feet became blocks of ice, I had no hat or gloves due to wardrobe's instructions & I wasn't sure if I could sprint in those shoes w/cold feet.
However, when it was time to go I did rise to the occasion. I made it where I needed to & did damn good for my feet being ice blocks. Guess those days of wearing heeled shoes all the time in high school came back to me.
One of the fellow background actors was shocked I actually did it. Hey, I work behind the scenes & believe in doing unto others. Call it an endurance test.
This is nothing compared to what the lead actress had to do. Apparently, she had to be on a cold car hood in much less clothing for her scene. I, at least, had a coat & scarf + was wearing pants.
D) Our holding area was in a very cold warehouse. Everyone was bundled up while waiting. Taking your gloves off wasn't smart in that setting.
Near the end of the day when I was on a higher floor to make phone calls (as I had no cell reception in the holding area & the bathroom did have reception), I was telling a crew person that they are much better people than me for working in these cold conditions. They are, in fact.
E) My car came in for pictures that may appear in the program. You'd see me on my cell phone + my coat open at the wardrobe person's instruction. I followed my direction very well & as I was leaving to go back, I was picked up then told to wait somewhere else in the scene. Eventually, we were not used & I got to go back inside.
I made it back home a little after 10 & did manage to find parking in my limited parking neighborhood.
Now for the takeaway lessons (as I feel maybe once I've done about 4-5 & ideally on different sets/situations, I'll be done w/the learning & observations).
1. There are extra roles I will not consider or take. Some examples are:
* Prostitute, escort, stripper, other "adult" type parts. I don't want to have to explain that sort of thing to attorneys from the bar associations I belong to, investors & anyone else I have to interact with on a business basis. Let's not even talk about explaining that to my 7 year old nephew or my parents, in-laws, etc.
* Rape or slasher movie victim w/out some lines. Again, don't want to have to explain that one.
* "Ugly" roles. Let's fact it: Central Casting or whomever is responsible for background on these 2 shows has spoken otherwise as to my looks. I probably do look like the TV version of particular things but I don't think I can convince anyone I can play "ugly."
* Anything involving nudity, kissing others (male, female or anywhere in between), sex scenes, etc. Being happily married & business credibility cover those reasons nicely.
Let's add exterior shots to that list if I'm not wearing temperature appropriate clothing. I don't really have to do background work so there's no need for me to do stuff like that. Once is enough.
2. I can drive through Brooklyn just fine. I drove though some convoluted parts & if I've got GPS or good directions, I'm just fine. I hadn't done it before & wasn't sure I could but seems all that driving in downtown Atlanta came in handy.
3. My artistic dedication tends to lead to me shooting myself in the foot. That whole perfectionist streak has trumped my personal comfort more than once. People need to watch me on that & reign it in if necessary.
4. I'm never going to be a full time actor. I do not have the dedication you need for it & my limits aren't going to change anytime soon. Those actors wearing bikinis in freezing cold weather are far better people than I am. You deserve respect for that & if you work w/me, I'll be making sure you get it as long as you don't piss me off.
I'm also never going to have representation, one of the hallmarks of a full time actor. Why not, you ask? It's hard to get it anyway but most people aren't professional advocates working in the industry like I am. I don't have the experience for higher ups to consider me & I don't think the lower rung people are going to be any better at it than me.
To me, getting some lower rung agent is like having someone w/a lower class grade than me do my homework. If I'm making an A in Geometry, why would I let someone who's making a C do my Geometry homework for me (presuming I'm not trying to sabotage myself)? That's just stupid. You'd have to convince me you were at least as good as me & I don't see that happening.
To me, it makes that representation search a total waste of time. I can just ask a trustworthy attorney friend to be a go-between instead of gambling on a total stranger.
Since actors need that stuff & I have limits, I don't think I'll ever be doing it full time unless I got to say "No" to things.
Think I'm wrong about representation as it pertains to me personally? Convince me why I should deal w/some lower rung person who doesn't have more knowledge than me, won't work as hard as me & doesn't have anything that I don't. Remember that I interned w/a very established talent agent in the past so I know the score here.
* Oh, and I did make an A in Geometry; I was one of only a few people taking it as a 9th grader & even had a few seniors in my class. My academic record was a main reason I never cheated; who would I get to cheat for me & do better than I could? No one.
If I get this other job clenched, I'll have even more reason not to consider some lower rung agent since I'll be making more industry contacts.
5. Never let an attorney get frostbitten or injured. The job market for the field is in the gutter, I'd sue & I've got six figure loan debt to repay. I can be creative & come up with a high damages figure.
This goes for any attorney, not just me. Some are 1,000 times worse in this kind of thing & do not have souls or a conscience.
Right now, I'm sick as a dog since I caught my husband's illness. Still had to go outside today, which sucked but at least I got my mailing done & the car started. Back to soothing a sore throat.
* When the car battery dies if you don't run it for 2 days, you tend to get concerned about making sure it gets some movement. *
So, I get selected for this role. It requires me to drive 15 minutes from home into an area of Brooklyn that's fairly decent. This time, the show was Law & Order: SVU. If you see me there, again I'll be shocked. I haven't watched that one either, so this will be another instance where someone else tells me if I'm on there. Again, I was the only redhead & no one even came close to looking like me. There were also fewer people this time.
I would really like to find people living in my city who look enough like me to really pass for me (being a natural redhead w/my shade is a prime requirement); they would likely have the same problems I've had & might also like the idea of fooling folk by switching places.
In middle school, there was a redhead who wore her hair straight while I wore mine curly & longer. Her name also started w/an "M" and people were always mixing me up with her. This mistaken identity issue even came up years later when I was at the Senior Class Picnic & the DJ claimed I'd dated a guy that she dated. The guy was merely a friend of mine in middle school; seems he came out after high school but there was talk of him being gay in high school. I was like "That was the other girl, not me!" I'm sure there are still some things people will swear I did b/c rumors about me were so pervasive despite my trying to debunk them, I just played along after a while. Yes, I DID go w/that guy in middle school who never said a word to me & was popular while I was being harassed by the gossipy bitch girls!
If my middle school/high school life had been Hollywood, I was definitely a tabloid celebrity. I had to deal w/most of the same people so I didn't really get much of a chance at reinvention.
So, here's how experience #2 went (no episode secrets will be revealed):
A) When I went to the parking area before my call time, there was NO parking + I could not get to the street I needed to be on. I called up Central Casting to tell them about this. They alerted the powers that be. Eventually I did get to a spot & made it inside, though a little late.
I did apologize for my lateness & apparently many people had that particular problem. The on-set reps handling check-ins were very understanding. More examples of the professionalism I like to see.
B) I saw yet another actor from the whole previous TV network scam. Not just any actor, though. This was the infamous one who irritated people & pissed them off. Apparently, this individual also ticked off someone I know from another sphere.
I'll give this individual a few things though: I won't hear about this person sleeping w/anyone to get to the top or putting more importance on background work than needed. This person also took my advice & got an entertainment lawyer to help her. I do have slightly more respect for her than I did previously.
Why do I keep seeing people who know me from that on these gigs? Killing my whole mission here.
C) I decide to bring in my heels that I normally wear w/business suits, closed toe & very corporate looking.
Unfortunately, the front of my feet were only separated from the windy, cold weather in shooting with pantyhose (you'd have seen my tights). I was outside a good chunk of time & had to run for my role. My feet became blocks of ice, I had no hat or gloves due to wardrobe's instructions & I wasn't sure if I could sprint in those shoes w/cold feet.
However, when it was time to go I did rise to the occasion. I made it where I needed to & did damn good for my feet being ice blocks. Guess those days of wearing heeled shoes all the time in high school came back to me.
One of the fellow background actors was shocked I actually did it. Hey, I work behind the scenes & believe in doing unto others. Call it an endurance test.
This is nothing compared to what the lead actress had to do. Apparently, she had to be on a cold car hood in much less clothing for her scene. I, at least, had a coat & scarf + was wearing pants.
D) Our holding area was in a very cold warehouse. Everyone was bundled up while waiting. Taking your gloves off wasn't smart in that setting.
Near the end of the day when I was on a higher floor to make phone calls (as I had no cell reception in the holding area & the bathroom did have reception), I was telling a crew person that they are much better people than me for working in these cold conditions. They are, in fact.
E) My car came in for pictures that may appear in the program. You'd see me on my cell phone + my coat open at the wardrobe person's instruction. I followed my direction very well & as I was leaving to go back, I was picked up then told to wait somewhere else in the scene. Eventually, we were not used & I got to go back inside.
I made it back home a little after 10 & did manage to find parking in my limited parking neighborhood.
Now for the takeaway lessons (as I feel maybe once I've done about 4-5 & ideally on different sets/situations, I'll be done w/the learning & observations).
1. There are extra roles I will not consider or take. Some examples are:
* Prostitute, escort, stripper, other "adult" type parts. I don't want to have to explain that sort of thing to attorneys from the bar associations I belong to, investors & anyone else I have to interact with on a business basis. Let's not even talk about explaining that to my 7 year old nephew or my parents, in-laws, etc.
* Rape or slasher movie victim w/out some lines. Again, don't want to have to explain that one.
* "Ugly" roles. Let's fact it: Central Casting or whomever is responsible for background on these 2 shows has spoken otherwise as to my looks. I probably do look like the TV version of particular things but I don't think I can convince anyone I can play "ugly."
* Anything involving nudity, kissing others (male, female or anywhere in between), sex scenes, etc. Being happily married & business credibility cover those reasons nicely.
Let's add exterior shots to that list if I'm not wearing temperature appropriate clothing. I don't really have to do background work so there's no need for me to do stuff like that. Once is enough.
2. I can drive through Brooklyn just fine. I drove though some convoluted parts & if I've got GPS or good directions, I'm just fine. I hadn't done it before & wasn't sure I could but seems all that driving in downtown Atlanta came in handy.
3. My artistic dedication tends to lead to me shooting myself in the foot. That whole perfectionist streak has trumped my personal comfort more than once. People need to watch me on that & reign it in if necessary.
4. I'm never going to be a full time actor. I do not have the dedication you need for it & my limits aren't going to change anytime soon. Those actors wearing bikinis in freezing cold weather are far better people than I am. You deserve respect for that & if you work w/me, I'll be making sure you get it as long as you don't piss me off.
I'm also never going to have representation, one of the hallmarks of a full time actor. Why not, you ask? It's hard to get it anyway but most people aren't professional advocates working in the industry like I am. I don't have the experience for higher ups to consider me & I don't think the lower rung people are going to be any better at it than me.
To me, getting some lower rung agent is like having someone w/a lower class grade than me do my homework. If I'm making an A in Geometry, why would I let someone who's making a C do my Geometry homework for me (presuming I'm not trying to sabotage myself)? That's just stupid. You'd have to convince me you were at least as good as me & I don't see that happening.
To me, it makes that representation search a total waste of time. I can just ask a trustworthy attorney friend to be a go-between instead of gambling on a total stranger.
Since actors need that stuff & I have limits, I don't think I'll ever be doing it full time unless I got to say "No" to things.
Think I'm wrong about representation as it pertains to me personally? Convince me why I should deal w/some lower rung person who doesn't have more knowledge than me, won't work as hard as me & doesn't have anything that I don't. Remember that I interned w/a very established talent agent in the past so I know the score here.
* Oh, and I did make an A in Geometry; I was one of only a few people taking it as a 9th grader & even had a few seniors in my class. My academic record was a main reason I never cheated; who would I get to cheat for me & do better than I could? No one.
If I get this other job clenched, I'll have even more reason not to consider some lower rung agent since I'll be making more industry contacts.
5. Never let an attorney get frostbitten or injured. The job market for the field is in the gutter, I'd sue & I've got six figure loan debt to repay. I can be creative & come up with a high damages figure.
This goes for any attorney, not just me. Some are 1,000 times worse in this kind of thing & do not have souls or a conscience.
Right now, I'm sick as a dog since I caught my husband's illness. Still had to go outside today, which sucked but at least I got my mailing done & the car started. Back to soothing a sore throat.
Sunday, January 24, 2010
My Teen Years are Today's Norm?????
I read this story on MSN today.
To establish some background on why I'd have an opinion on this, I got a driver's license at 20. This was after failing the road test twice at 16, being told I'd have to get glasses for driving b/c of my cruddy vision (damn genetics) & the rise of graduated licensing laws in NC.
When I turned 17, I was required to get a Level 1 graduated license (w/more restrictions than I had on the Learner's Permit I had at 15). Under the law, they'd have to give me a regular license when I turned 18. Everyone I knew, including my LITTLE sister, got a driver's license before this law change.
After all this indignity, I decided that since I was going to college in Atlanta, I wouldn't need a driver's license & could just use public transit.
I'm not a fan of the DMV today but I wanted the one closest to my house to be blown up, I hated it that much. Oh, I should also mention that the first time I took the road test at that DMV I was driving a car I had driven all of once & the instructor told me to clean the windshield. I also wasn't told I'd be required to back up in a straight line so this was just another curve ball thrown at me.
Needless to say, my experience with driving was not fun. My sister got a brand new car (our parents paid) & had to drive me around when I was a senior. Know how humiliating that is, especially when you're supposed to be the more mature, intelligent kid? Granted, she got into a few accidents but it was irritating for me to be in after school activities & have to wait around 2 hours for my mom to get off work so I'd have a ride home b/c most people didn't care if or how I got home. My school was over 2 miles from home in an area without sidewalks + my mom would not let us walk that by ourselves. Taking the bus to go to AP classes off campus was also a pain in the butt since I had to wait around at least an hour before my first class started & had to return to sit around at school until 2:20 when I returned on that bus, despite my class ending at 1:50.
In college, I made my own choice to get a license but I did it after getting my own car & getting sick of taking wheeled suitcases to go to the grocery store + walking to the bank to deposit my work study paycheck. Things were fine after that.
So I have to wonder WHY, in God's name would some teenager not living in NYC or someplace with great public transit NOT want to get a license? The "too busy" excuse is weak since I knew people who were in AP classes, extracurriculars, held part-time jobs & "prepared for college" who STILL had licenses (and many times, cars).
Maybe cost would be a factor but it's never been cheap. I never even got to go on dates w/my high school boyfriend since neither of us drove & parents driving you on a date is intrusive. His parents driving us to the prom SUCKED, especially b/c we didn't get to stay out all night.
Do these people have stay at home parents??? My parents worked until late so my being in any after school activity was a pain unless a bus could get me home or I got a ride--that almost never happened. My mom was also alone later on in my high school years so I was stuck.
Do these parents just take their kids ANYWHERE?? Mine wouldn't have done that. There were limits & punishment in my home.
To put some perspective here, I'm not some old fart. I graduated high school in 1999 so there was some Internet & such at the time, though not at the levels you see today. If anything, social networking would have inspired me to get a car quicker so I could see friends living outside my hometown.
So any insights on this? I'm really stumped unless some college kids haven't had to get their own groceries yet or had the transit system shut down or close routes on them.
To establish some background on why I'd have an opinion on this, I got a driver's license at 20. This was after failing the road test twice at 16, being told I'd have to get glasses for driving b/c of my cruddy vision (damn genetics) & the rise of graduated licensing laws in NC.
When I turned 17, I was required to get a Level 1 graduated license (w/more restrictions than I had on the Learner's Permit I had at 15). Under the law, they'd have to give me a regular license when I turned 18. Everyone I knew, including my LITTLE sister, got a driver's license before this law change.
After all this indignity, I decided that since I was going to college in Atlanta, I wouldn't need a driver's license & could just use public transit.
I'm not a fan of the DMV today but I wanted the one closest to my house to be blown up, I hated it that much. Oh, I should also mention that the first time I took the road test at that DMV I was driving a car I had driven all of once & the instructor told me to clean the windshield. I also wasn't told I'd be required to back up in a straight line so this was just another curve ball thrown at me.
Needless to say, my experience with driving was not fun. My sister got a brand new car (our parents paid) & had to drive me around when I was a senior. Know how humiliating that is, especially when you're supposed to be the more mature, intelligent kid? Granted, she got into a few accidents but it was irritating for me to be in after school activities & have to wait around 2 hours for my mom to get off work so I'd have a ride home b/c most people didn't care if or how I got home. My school was over 2 miles from home in an area without sidewalks + my mom would not let us walk that by ourselves. Taking the bus to go to AP classes off campus was also a pain in the butt since I had to wait around at least an hour before my first class started & had to return to sit around at school until 2:20 when I returned on that bus, despite my class ending at 1:50.
In college, I made my own choice to get a license but I did it after getting my own car & getting sick of taking wheeled suitcases to go to the grocery store + walking to the bank to deposit my work study paycheck. Things were fine after that.
So I have to wonder WHY, in God's name would some teenager not living in NYC or someplace with great public transit NOT want to get a license? The "too busy" excuse is weak since I knew people who were in AP classes, extracurriculars, held part-time jobs & "prepared for college" who STILL had licenses (and many times, cars).
Maybe cost would be a factor but it's never been cheap. I never even got to go on dates w/my high school boyfriend since neither of us drove & parents driving you on a date is intrusive. His parents driving us to the prom SUCKED, especially b/c we didn't get to stay out all night.
Do these people have stay at home parents??? My parents worked until late so my being in any after school activity was a pain unless a bus could get me home or I got a ride--that almost never happened. My mom was also alone later on in my high school years so I was stuck.
Do these parents just take their kids ANYWHERE?? Mine wouldn't have done that. There were limits & punishment in my home.
To put some perspective here, I'm not some old fart. I graduated high school in 1999 so there was some Internet & such at the time, though not at the levels you see today. If anything, social networking would have inspired me to get a car quicker so I could see friends living outside my hometown.
So any insights on this? I'm really stumped unless some college kids haven't had to get their own groceries yet or had the transit system shut down or close routes on them.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
