Paying for Sanity, The Incompetence After the Storm & Why Can't We Get Burlseque at the Bar?

This is a lesson I've had to remind myself of tons of times. As a frugal person by nature, I tend to be very picky about spending money & have refused to spend what I feel is too much on something. My husband has a similar attitude; that's probably one reason our marriage works so well. I don't have to fight with anyone who spends money like a drunken sailor who believes he's never getting laid ever again so has to spend a fortune on entertaining the hottest girl in the room so he won't die without having gotten that quickie along with getting that good, stiff drink since they're no longer making that brand of liquor. We're huge believers in frugality.

At the same time, though I've found there are times when it's okay to spend more money. One of those times was today for gasoline.

You may have read about NYC's gas lines & recent start of rationing. I was awakened Tuesday morning by horn honking from stopped cars that were in a gas line on my block. If they'd not suspended parking that day & my car wasn't already on the proper side to avoid being ticked, I would not have been able to move my car to the proper side. Those parking tickets aren't cheap.

I also saw the craziness in walking around my neighborhood & I'm having none of it. Fortunately, we had more gas in our car pre-Sandy that I thought we had. This meant the freedom of choice. I'd heard there were no lines in Connecticut or near a relative in New Jersey (where I understand gas rationing is still going on but has actually made a difference).

I decided to go to Connecticut to get gas & got up at 7 this morning to make that happen. Bear in mind that lately, I've been waking up around 12/1 p.m. (Sandy also screwed up my sleep schedule). I had to go today in order to be able to go on a trip that's been planned for months. Getting there & back was so much easier, let me tell you.

The station near my house had a line when I left for Connecticut & when I got back at around 9-9:15 this morning, the line had started to take over the main road I had to travel on. A normally 2 lane road was now 1 lane. I paid 50 cents more per gallon but I am more than happy to have paid it, for many reasons.

1. Not sitting in a 30 minutes if I'm lucky line. I'm not a person you want doing that since I've got a temper & if you mess with me, there will be problems. I also never claimed to be a paragon of patience.
2. Not paying increased tolls to get to New Jersey.
3. Not having to drive in Manhattan to go to that part of New Jersey. My route was all highway.
4. Being more familiar with Connecticut since I used to live there. I also know Connecticut doesn't have traffic circles or areas where you can't make left turns.

If this were a credit card commercial, it would end with Saving time & preventing unnecessary arrests: priceless. It's like "Wow, having lived in Connecticut for 3 years & driving around various areas of the state came in handy." That drive also helped me refresh my driving legs for the upcoming road trip & means we can actually take that road trip.

To avoid a gas line, you bet I'll do this. Essentially, it's paying for comfort. I found the same to be true when I took Amtrak on business class. That experience is why I'm not doing anything unless I can pay to get business class or not deal with crazy BS that's just going to raise my blood pressure & feel like Chinese water torture. Or for an analogy closer to home, maybe I should say I try to avoid situations akin to having a thong stuck in your butt & not being able to move it because you're at a work function or business meeting where there's no bathroom in sight or you're stuck with some irritating jerk you're just pretending to like who refuses to mingle.

I tend to resent paying more money for such things but today, I had no problem with it. Extraordinary circumstances & all. Can't believe Bloomberg claims this is going to continue for "a few more weeks." All I can say is he'd better be suspending alternate side parking restrictions while that's going on since I'm not waiting for a gas line to leave my block so I can move my car to the proper place. The street has enough room for one car on it so forget passing anyone; the only way you'll get people to move there is with a weapon or a death threat.

I'm also gratified to hear that people in Long Island started protesting at LIPA's headquarters because of the slow moving progress to restore power. My husband said LIPA is worthless & is glad he doesn't have to deal with them. Most people I know have either long since gotten their power back or never lost it in the first place (including in Long Island). I want their leadership to get nailed by the governor & hopefully forced to pay heavy fines. I'm sure those people without power would also like to see them serve some jail time.

You know, maybe the protestors without power should go camp out at the board members' homes & say "Until you restore our power, we're not moving." Might light some fires under a few behind if you did that, don't you think? Wouldn't it be ironic if they called the cops & the cops who showed up were also without power & sided with the protestors? Or maybe if the cops were human beings & agreed with this act? Gee, desperate times. Anyone get the memo on that?

I can't imagine the management there is sitting with no electricity at this point & I'd bet money they aren't.

Anyhow, another time I have to tell myself it's okay to spend money is if paying more means higher quality. There's also paying for things you don't already have or if you need a replacement. I'm very much of the school of using things until you can't anymore. I feel it's wasteful to get rid of something that still works or still fits you if it's not in disrepair. Had to reluctantly get rid of a rain coat I still can't find a viable replacement for due to it being in disrepair & despite my efforts in sewing up holes. I'd just get new holes in it. That still pisses me off & I can't find a replacement for it in my size. No one seems to have it & I adamantly refuse to get something that looks frumpy, boring or dull. Nor do I get things that look like what everyone else is wearing; kill me for having an aesthetic & caring about my appearance.

In other news, I got a part in the next City Bar show & guess what I'm playing: a "lady of the evening." I did get the one line I asked for & will get some solo singing in a song. This is probably the only venue where I can play that role without worrying about exploitation, losing credibility in my industry or getting a grievance filed against me. I also have to find out the time period of the show so I know how to do costuming. I have ideas; got the boots already though they aren't stripper heels. They come up pretty high on my leg & I've got lots of short skirts.

One thing I know is that I can't dress like I normally do. For one thing, no one's ever mistaken me for a prostitute (even in NC & Atlanta) & I've seen NYC prostitutes. They dress much more revealing than I do.

My husband's wary about it but I pointed out that I can't dress in something I'd wear normally (especially in the summer) since that's not honest to the role or the scene if it's present day. I most certainly will make sure nothing's going to be coming out unexpectedly (otherwise, I'd feel too self-conscious) & I've been on stage in all sorts of getup over the years. I've been in a swimsuit & reminded him that I did a song for my law school talent night one year in a lingerie top (a long camisole top that had a bra built in & was in the lingerie section of the store I got it from). We were dating at that time & he did not play Fashion Police over it.

If I get to dress as a modern day prostitute, I'll be thrilled since it will be an opportunity for rebellion. When I read the role, I was in immediately since I thought "In this stuffy forum, getting to do that & get away with it would be awesome!" Plus, no one would get to accuse me of hiding my body in shame or because I have scars or something that embarrasses me. I'm always trying to find ways to rebel in that atmosphere & man, if that's not the ultimate way to do so I'm not sure what is. There's also the stretch of my acting muscles if I get to play it honestly. If it's not present day, I'll have to buy stuff.

I've often thought about how cool it would be if we had burlesque at a bar association event; not all the shows involve nudity & most of the acts I've seen had zero nudity. It's also an art form & does require some talent I don't have. The outfit I have in mind would certainly lend to more clothing than most burlesque performers end up in at the end of their acts. Plus, burlesque is certainly not the same as stripping & only an uncultured idiot who doesn't know anything about it would say it was. There's a different format & tone in burlesque than there is a strip show. I also don't think a burlesque performer will give you a lap dance no matter how much money you offer her (or him, but mostly her). The men would probably still be titillated enough to show up though at the Liberty Belle Spectacular, it was mostly women watching the burlesque performances.

Now to fully enjoy Car 54, Where Are You? Hopefully, I'll be awake enough to watch Dobie Gillis after this. I like both of these shows since they are funny as hell & wish they had good DVD sets. If they did, we'd own them in a heartbeat. I'm sad that Car 54 had cruddy DVD sets. Why can't METv show their full schedule in my area?! I have it on DVD but I'd watch Get Smart on there or see about watching The Donna Reed Show since I've not seen it since the late '80s when we had cable & Nick at Nite. Why can't they show these programs at more convenient times than 2 & 3 a.m. on Saturday nights? I hate the stupid infomercials they show for half the day when we could be watching MeTV shows, considering we don't have Antenna TV.

How NOT To Run A Business...or How to Get on The Angry Redheaded Lawyer's Shit List

Well, at least in the doghouse. Not redeeming yourself pretty much means you'll be on the shit list. Being on my shit list means "Pray that I never hit hard times or you're going to need a 24 hour bodyguard & even that might not be enough."

I don't put people on my shit list or in my doghouse for no reason. You don't get there by giving me a weird look or doing something small. No, you have to do something extreme, something that would make a rational person dislike you. Sincere apologies will also get you out of there.

However, I encountered more instances of appalling behavior that makes me wonder how these businesses & people are going to stay alive with good reputations.

First off, a warning about an entertainment scam artist. I saw the following Craig's List ad last week during my husband's vacation:

Prominent Management and artist development company is seeking interns (Midtown)
Date: 2010-07-09, 3:44PM EDT
Reply to: jasondivamaker@gmail.com [Errors when replying to ads?]

Prominent Management and artist development company is seeking interns to work closely with the Senior CEO on exciting Fashion,TV and Music accounts. 



The ideal candidate will have a strong desire to work in the Entertainment Business as well as a basic understanding of the public relations industry. 

S/he will be equally passionate about assisting in media pitching and planning major events. A positive, can-do attitude is a must, as well as strong writing ability. Previous internship experience is a plus. Must have reliable transportation and be able to work flexible hours 

Candidates without resumes will not be considered. Only those who fit our requirements will be contacted. Send inquiries to jasondivamaker@gmail.com with a PHONE number so you can be contacted if you dont leave a number we cant call you back. THIS IS A 4 MONTH NON-PAID INTERNSHIP AFTER YOUR 4TH MONTH IS UP YOU WILL START BEING PAID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SO IF YOU THINK YOU SHOULD BE PAID NOW AND YOU DONT NEED TO LEARN ANYTHING THEN YOU SHOULD NOT CONTACT US WE DO NOT WANT TO WASTE YOUR TIME THIS IS NOT FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!! 



Thank you for your interest! 
Lisa Rosenburg
310-6215857

* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
* Compensation: no pay

PostingID: 1834297844

Here's what I wrote in response to this ad, as someone who knows plenty of industry people & knows this isn't the normal sort of ad you'd see:

Sounds like you know nothing about business or the down economy. Furthermore, you apparently wish to insult people who have references & the people who work or worked w/them.

If you want the benefit of someone's prior experience, you need to PAY them. Otherwise, just take the newbies that you can get & pay for the training.

I'm also willing to bet that you're just trying to extract free labor for 3 months + make someone pay for their transportation to be at your beck & call only to say after the 4th month that you're broke or make up some excuse not to pay someone.

Do you work for a man named Bennie Barnes/Bennie Balbonie/Rico Barnes??? That's what this ad sounds like, especially when you get all demanding about a freaking INTERNSHIP. You should be running a law firm w/your unrealistic expectations & demands.

Rule #1 in good business: You NEVER pass up the opportunity to speak to someone w/experience. I have gotten many a gig & contact this way. Every legitimate business person I've met appreciates dealing w/people who have experience.

Not talking to them is the exact same thing as turning down an actor with years of experience to work with a total newbie. Or rejecting SAG actors for projects that are exempt from SAG coverage to work with a non-union actor without considering either person's resume. There's a common premise that union actors are more serious about acting + have more experience that non-union actors. Whether that's true or not is a different story.

But as a general life principle, experience trumps newbie, agreed?

So this is what I get in response to my rationally written, polite e-mail:

YOU SOUND LIKE ONE STUPID ASS BITCH THAT WHY YOUR STANK ASS IS ON HERE LOOKING FOR WORK AND NO I AM NOT THE PERSON YOU THINK I AM I WORK WITH PEOPLE THAT ARE CREDITABLE AND WELL KNOWN AND IT'S YOUR LOST STUPID AS DIDN'T P DIDDY WORK AS AN INTERN EVERYONE IS NOT TRYING TO GET OVER WE WERE HONEST WITH YOUR STUPID ASS AND TAHT WAS NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU SO FUCK U U DIRTY BITCH

The only other person I knew of who wrote e-mail in this way was my former scam artist boss whom I asked about in my e-mail. I noted the all caps, bad spelling & cursing; all signs of a scam artist.

Furthermore, how would this "jason williams" speak to one of his artists or their people? Try speaking like that to a music exec or one of their interns sometime & see where it gets you. I had to post this little exchange on Craig's List to warn potential interns that some people in this business have respect for their interns & employees + this screams "scam artist." Some do not behave like ghetto trash, which is what I consider this person to be based on that little exchange. Talking like that to total strangers is a good way to get your head blown off or become disfigured. For all this schmuck knows, I'm a raging lunatic who's been following him for months & just waiting to hire someone to kill him.

Rule #2: Use professional writing when you speak to anyone on a business matter. Otherwise, your scam artistry is not just showing but screaming at people. Legitimate business professionals do not curse at total strangers or send out messages like that one.

If this guy is legit, he will never last.

Aside from this little exchange, I'm also pretty pissed off at an attorney I contacted to see about interest in product placement. An attorney named Lev Ekster started a business called Cupcake Stop that just opened a location in Chelsea. Since I'm working on a project where I'd like to see about product placement but don't have $ to pay anyone for it, I wanted to see about a fellow attorney who is one of my LinkedIn contacts. Since I work in this business, I like to try helping people in my boat & who might appreciate more exposure.

So I decide to send an inquiry about it, figuring it couldn't hurt me to at least ask. He sets up a meeting w/me a few days later. I explain that I won't be available the next week b/c my husband will be out of work & I like spending time with him. Mentioned not having tried the product yet but that I'd explain why I contacted him in this meeting. Well, the meeting never happened. I was dressed in business attire, which I normally don't since no one's paying me the $ for it. I had to stop by the court house that day to investigate my former employer & make sure I couldn't continue working there.

Apparently, he got interest from the Food Network in getting a reality series about his shop. I read about the story through the ABA's website. Since I could care less about anyone's celebrity status & sort of fight that struggle myself, I'm the last person you'd call a Johnny Come Lately. If there's anyone who doesn't need to ride someone's coattails or won't bother groveling to you, it's me.

I've tried contacting this guy to no avail. His employee even got my cell number & business cards; I should have demanded his # & did ask for it as a fairness since I don't normally give mine out + was kind of forced to in that situation. I sent an e-mail + Facebook message yesterday asking point blank if he was still interested in meeting with me. I appreciate the free cupcakes I got but responsible business people follow up personally on things. He's yet to do so.

Quite frankly, that has me pissed. Does he think that now that the Food Network contacted him, he can treat me like shit? Better think again. Reality TV doesn't make you a real actor; I also think getting 2 feature films that will be in the marketplace THIS MONTH & my company getting more known before this reality show gets on the air means it might pay to be nice to me. That doesn't even cover other stuff that I do or people I know.

Oh, and being on a national show is not the same as being in an ABA story. MUCH bigger audience, more BS to put up with & unless you've had to do it yourself or had a stalker, you don't have a clue what it's like. I had local celebrity status, a stalker ex + an ex who made me apprehensive after the break-up.

I also know a bit more about this business & it benefits anyone who's not been in it to know someone w/that knowledge. Those people could use others to talk to who don't have an angle or want to ride coattails. Smart people would never want to be famous; they'd want to work behind the scenes.

Rule #3: You miss a meeting, it's your mea culpa. You'd better be doing everything in your power to rectify that situation or you're going to burn bridges.

Rule #4: If you don't want to do something for someone, tell them directly. Don't be a dick job interviewer who never follows up w/an interview candidate. That's something else I've told people off for.

This guy has simply confirmed why I don't give a shit about doing anything for attorneys as a group. If you're a friend or at least someone who has respect for creative types, I'm much nicer but that loyalty I feel to fellow creatives isn't one I share w/fellow attorneys. The ditching doesn't make me nearly as mad as the lack of follow-up.

So for any attorney entrepreneurs who don't already know me & get pissed b/c I dislike them on sight, you have Lev Ekster to thank for that. He's not the first attorney to piss me off but his acts have definitely added to my general dislike & lack of sympathy for attorneys as a whole. If he bothers to redeem himself to me, I'll be completely shocked.

He's also the one who friended me on Facebook after setting up this meeting he never showed up to or personally apologized for ditching but the fact remains: I didn't take shit from people in high school when I worked in retail so why would I do it now?

Honestly, I think that's why attorneys aren't getting sympathy when it comes to the loans & "law school scam". Maybe if some of you were more likable to the general public, they might give a damn. Most of you make me look like Simon the Likable from Get Smart & I definitely have my share of detractors.