Wednesday, September 29, 2010

General Musings, Part 7

The past few days have been eventful for me. First off, I was helping at a fundrasing event for the TV company on Sunday in Harlem (meaning I was gone almost all day). Started going home after it was close to 8 p.m. since I had an hour train ride & a hubby waiting for me. Those of you thinking being married sucks, it doesn't if you married the right person. If you actually like your spouse, you want to see him/her. I couldn't see staying married to someone if you don't even like being around him/her; I can hang around people I dislike anytime. It's called going to a big law firm & seeking out lawyers. Plenty of infuriating people there.

Second, I was getting sick the same day. On Monday I felt awful but still went grocery shopping w/my husband since I'm better at picking out vegetables. I love green pepper (even ate them as a small child) & had a traumatic experience when others selected some for me a few weeks back. I cut one open that was black on the outside. You don't want to know what I saw...I'm pretty certain I saw a living white maggot looking thing inside but I saw some movement, freaked out & threw it away before lingering too long on whether I saw what I did. Not even the worst traumatic experience I had with food but it ranked right up here.

Third, I accidentally lock myself out of my apartment when I go to see if I can actually move my car today. No one was home so I asked someone across the street outside if I could borrow a cell phone to call my husband. I ended up having to drive through Queens to his job to get his house keys. To make this story better, I had on pajamas, a robe & slippers. No purse, no money, no cell phone. I also don't drive around Queens that much so I only half knew where I was going & was freaking out about going the wrong way. FINALLY, I get home. It made me not want to leave my house for a while.

I thought "Thank God I don't live alone or I'd be waiting all day for my landlord, who may or may not have a set of keys to the apartment."

Before you think I'm an idiot, this is the first time it's ever happened since I lived in NYC. This is also only maybe the second time it's happened in my adult life. I've lived in NYC for over 3 years so this is hardly an everyday thing. Everyone's been yukking it up over this whole thing but I do know where to get off to turn around if you go the wrong direction on the Grand Central Parkway.

So I'm thinking w/all the ridiculous Craig's List job ads I see in the jobs & gigs section, it's time to create a feature called "Let's Laugh at This Ridiculous Ad." Maybe I could get readers to send me the links or text to good ones & I'll credit them if I post it. How about it??? Anyone interested?

A few points: The ads MUST be in the Jobs or Gigs section. It's way too easy to rag on personals & missed connections ads. Some service ads might also fit this. If it's just too hilarious to ignore, however, we can discuss it.

The purpose of this exercise, when I'm doing it at least, is to point out the utter stupidity and absurd conduct employers think the average worker is supposed to put up with. Like we're all supposed to jump for joy to slave away as law firm associates for 30K a year in a private practice law firm. Or submit photographs to work as Executive Assistants or jump through ridiculous hoops for a job having nothing to do with the hoop you're being asked to jump through. I see plenty of those in my city that I'd be shocked to see on a or some other legit job hunting site.

Also, tell me why I should give special attention to the ad. I don't know the standards for all industries in the world so enlighten me if something is tantamount to asking for sweatshop labor. I'd like to limit this to the US unless you wish to enlighten me on working conditions in your country & can tell me why the foreign country ad is appalling. Heck, if your labor practices are better & your country has decent paying jobs + both I and my husband are likely to get them, you might get asked to help me & mine get citizenship.

So another ridiculous ad I saw today:

Date: 2010-09-28, 11:47PM EDT
Reply to: [Errors when replying to ads?]

A paralegal intern needed for a busy Bronx law office. The intern should be enrolled in a paralegal program and able to obtain credit for this internship from their institution. If your most recent employment was working in Best Buy or a 7-11 you need not apply. I am looking for real office experience that means that you should be able to speak clearly, write well and legibly, follow instructions, use your own ingenuity, work individually and in group settings, multi-task, and have reasonable computer skills. The internship will be a non-paying internship until the end of your semester (April or May) with the possibility of full-time employment subsequent to the internship term. Intern applicants should be from The Bronx, Lower Westchester or Upper Manhattan. Applicants from Queens, Staten Island, Brooklyn, Long Island, and Michigan need not apply. The reason for this is simple, I want someone who takes this position to live relatively close to the office without the need for a long commute.

So if this post interests you and you feel that you are qualified based upon the qualifications listed above then send me a resume and cover letter for my consideration. Any e-mails coming from cutsy e-mail addresses will be discarded as they are neither cute or professional. Any applicants with resumes with more than one page will be discarded as clearly you are too over-qualified for this position.

* Location: BRONX
* Compensation: Internship for credit at your institution with possibility for full-time employment
* This is an internship job
* Principals only. Recruiters, please don't contact this job poster.
* Please, no phone calls about this job!
* Please do not contact job poster about other services, products or commercial interests.

PostingID: 1979209280

Oh, where do I begin?

First off, there's no need for a "paralegal intern." There are no special skills to learn in an internship to be a paralegal; there's no training to learn. This is simply an attempt to get free labor & violate labor laws.

Second, you want office experience for an internship. Chances are, the person will demand "law firm experience" & if you're supposed to be an intern that means NO PRIOR EXPERIENCE NEEDED!!! You LEARN the job in the internship.

Third, it's discriminatory to demand your applicants to live in a particular location. Sounds like implicit classism to me since most of these areas are in more affluent areas of town + the commute is the intern's problem, not YOURS employer. If someone lives far away & can show up on time to work, what's it to you? Are you just trying to weasel your way into demanding the intern to work as many hours as the typical law firm associate or paralegal (50+ per week)??

Oh, yes and I don't see a word about travel reimbursement so not only are you not paying a wage you are demanding someone to PAY to work for you.

Fourth, you're going to tell someone you refuse to check mail from "cutsy e-mail addresses." Very, very vague b/c what's your definition? Anything hinting at a personality of any sort? Clearly, you are one of those douchebag lawyers I would like to see die in some gruesome way rather than one of our beloved comedians.

Finally, I have a hard time taking someone seriously w/respect to e-mail addresses and so forth when the ad writer fails to use proper grammar. Can't spell cutesy & "too overqualified" is redundant. There's only "overqualified." If a secretary or unpaid intern wrote this, it speaks to the lack of quality in this law firm. If you don't care enough to use proper grammar, why should I care about meeting your asinine requirements??

I'm still sorely tempted to answer this one directly but I'll never use a real e-mail address since it's no one's business who I am. They just deserve to know that someone's calling them on their douchebag behavior & that sooner or later, someone else will be taking action.

I also read this article while I was dealing with my life.

This author tries to diminish the importance of networking but by the end, I felt he merely highlighted how important it is in getting a job. Most of the people quoted claim that it is indeed effective. So I'd say the answer to that question is a qualified "Yes." In the entertainment world, it's "Hell, yes!"

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