Paying Managers to Be Babies: Why?

Last week, I went to a fashion show at the Dream Downtown in NYC. The week before, I'd personally modeled in a show there for Wicked Threads, a great brand you may want to check out. The designer is awesome & those shows have been some of the easiest I have done due to the lack of pressure and stress involved (at least as non-stressful as being a model in a fashion show gets). I personally had no problems and saw no issues with the venue; in fact, it's a very classy looking and gorgeous venue with ambiance & views. The ladies room is also one of the nicest I have been in NYC.

That week was part of my 4 days of crazy busy since I was in another show the next night at the Empire Hotel, was doing a TV appearance the next day, went to see Bayside! The Musical! that night (it was hilarious but oh, so wrong; don't go if you're easily offended or toting young kids/people who have zero sense of humor) & then had my photo shoot to finally do my comp card. After all that, I decided to take a bit of a breather & no one had asked me to model or posted anything saying they needed models so I decided to go to a fashion show that Friday as a spectator. I'd also known about it in advance & when you tell me about something in advance, I'm far more likely to make an effort to attend.

My husband also had an event to go to (and ended up networking; I told him I think my influence rubbed off on him) so no reason for me to sit at home. Plus, I've been going to events to try networking & build contacts.

You know what's great about going to fashion shows if you're a girly girl? You can get away with a lot as long as your outfit is semi-dressy. I also decided to try putting my hair up & didn't totally screw it up even though I'm nowhere close to good at creating an updo. Since I love a free opportunity to dress up, my going to fashion shows just makes sense for that alone. I also knew someone who was modeling in that show & worked with one of the designers before so I wanted to attend to support these people.

Other people I knew were in attendance so I talked to them & even met some new people. One photographer I hadn't met before actually came up to me & asked why I wasn't modeling that evening. I said "Nobody asked me," which was true.

Turns out it may have been a good thing I wasn't modeling that night. The show I was at was shut down by the venue's manager in the middle of the second show.

To put this in some context, the show that was interrupted was a swimsuit show. Lingerie & swimsuit shows are apparently more attended since people (men, in particular) like to see attractive young women in less clothing. The fact that I have worn less clothing in shows I've done is a compliment in my book since if I didn't have the body, no designer would want me going out on the runway representing his/her brand (especially in underwear or the like). There are also quite a few drinkers in the fashion world. Getting free drinks is a major issue after a show & I've seen people get mad if you aren't doing that for models and people involved in the shows.

Not to mention that fashion people have contacts, looks & some even have money. That would be the crowd any high level venue would want to attract & keep as customers. I don't recall hearing about Studio 54 being horrid to fashion people though they built their business around keeping people out & being exclusive. I have been to a number of fashion shows in my time (even before I was modeling in them myself) & that has never happened at any show I went to or participated in.

Well, for whatever reason, the manager at the venue we were at decided to curse out the designer, shoved a model, banished all the photographers (and I knew at least one who was there) & open the curtain where models were in stages of undress. Apparently, the night crowd was more important than this fashion show or maintaining goodwill at this high level event. I saw the organizer of the event later on (who is a Facebook friend I hadn't previously met in person) & told her if they wanted to look into legal action to contact me since I know a ton of attorneys and happen to be an entertainment one myself.

I also made sure to mention this little failing on Yelp and on their Facebook page along with telling the model I knew that if the girl who got shoved or anyone else wanted to pursue legal action, they could contact me. That really pisses me off since I have modeled myself & this jerk easily could have tried that with me. If he had, he'd have lived to regret it & I surely would have told him he just shoved an attorney.

This was far worse than what I saw when I did the show at the Empire Hotel the week before. That manager, a woman, apparently had a problem with the designer pulling out clothes to show models who were waiting outside the bathroom (since we were told we couldn't stay in the bathroom once we had changed & obviously couldn't go out where the general public was since you can't have people seeing your outfit before a fashion show). We end up getting moved to a darkened area with almost no lighting for anyone to see dresses & with no actual bathroom or formal changing area. There were gaps between this part & the part where we had to come out to model (which was quite lighted & filled with members of the general public alongside photographers, who we're used to seeing & aren't being a bunch of leering creepers trying to see naked ladies for sport). There wasn't really a changing area per se so we were getting dressed in this darkness near the non-curtained windows (though we were at the rooftop on a very high floor).

Now, one thing you should know about being a model is you can't be one of those super bashful girls when it comes to changing clothes. You're not likely to get a private changing area & junior high changing may not work for you depending on the outfit. I'm an expert in junior high changing (this is when you change your clothes in plain sight & do it without any glimpse of private parts) but there are garments you can't do that with. Sports bras are one of them. Pantyhose would be another.

If you've been to Joyce Leslie & tried anything on, you can't be bashful there either since they don't have fitting rooms but instead have one large room that women folk have to change in (at least at the one I went to near 8th Street & I was trying on a bra that day). Being in entertainment or going to Joyce Leslie should cure you of that bashfulness about changing in front of other women; you're too busy trying to get yourself ready & as others would point out "we all have the same stuff" so it's not worth freaking out over.

At the same time, there is a principle at work so I made sure to mention it to someone I knew. Still need to work on that Yelp review but been so busy lately with other things.

All these events irk me for another reason, though. Why in God's name are these managers being paid a salary by these venues to be shitty to guests? There are far more mature ways to handle a conflict than cursing someone out, shoving people, invading their privacy & so forth. I own a business & if I had a manager doing that in my business, I would fire their ass in a second. I don't know if they have contracts for the events but regardless, what about hospitality? These jerks are in the hospitality business; you're supposed to be NICE to people in it. If you hate people, don't work in that field. Come to think of it, there are lots of fields you should stay out of if you hate people. Not those who have done something to piss you off or are liars/jerks/etc.: I'm referring to hating people as your default position.

How many people are unemployed or underemployed in NYC? How many would do twice the work at half the pay & be damn appreciative and glad to have a job in the first place? What business owner would pay a manager to be a dickhead to people who are bringing crowds, alcohol sales & the like to their venue? What did I just say about fashion people & fashion shows? Why in the Hell would you want to alienate those people? You should be doing everything you can to make those people happy & get them to come back, invite their friends, talk you up & have a positive experience.

Not to mention the legal liability involved in making people change clothes in the dark, shoving women wearing very high heels & breaching contracts (oral or written). What if someone had gotten injured & ended up having to go to the hospital? Guess who'd be getting sued? The shitty manager might get named but the venue has deeper pockets so YOU owner(s) would be fucked over in that situation.

So along with bad PR, legal liability, potential backlash in desired demographics (I also don't advise pissing off photographers since they're actually fun people), high employee turnover (since God help the people who have to work for these assholes; the other staff members involved in these incidents were fine, including the security people) & creating a workplace where immaturity is allowed among so-called "professionals," why in the world would anyone with half a brain keep that kind of manager employed in their company? I, as a model, would certainly not feel comfortable modeling at the Dream Hotel Downtown if that asshole was in charge since who knows if that fucker would go invade MY privacy or lay a hand on ME? Where's the safety to models & anyone else providing entertainment at an event? If I'm thinking this, you know others have to be as well.

If someone told me "Oh, they were drunk," that would make me even less happy with a venue. How many episodes of Bar Rescue do you see where Jon Taffer is berating an owner for letting employees drink on the job & lecturing people about drinking at work? That's just announcing your workplace is unprofessional & a lawsuit waiting to happen.

The next day, still fired up from the Dream Downtown incident the night before, I went to Target & ended up calling up the manager to complain about a lazy fuck who refused to provide me with service when I asked for a rain check on an item. He apparently thought I was supposed to go get him an item number from a section when I don't work at Target, wouldn't know where the item number was & there's no real staffing in the section. He couldn't even be bothered to get a circular to look for the item! I would never have done that when I worked in retail & gee, we have phones so he could have called and tried to get the information but just wanted to be lazy.

At the end of the day, my attitude is "I earned my position & had to work for my paycheck. You need to be doing the same or getting the hell out of the way so someone who gives a damn will actually do the job." You have no sympathy from me when you're being unprofessional, rude, nasty, etc. & you work in customer service or hospitality. Low wages, my ass!

I worked in retail for 7 years & I didn't take out my unhappiness or attitude about my employer onto the customers (I also didn't hate my job or take one I know I would hate 100%). It's not their fault YOU hate your life or your job. That's a problem YOU need to deal with. Either make an attempt to change your lot in life or accept it; regardless, don't come bitching to customers about it. They do not care. Why is it that I got this lesson at 15 while there are people far older than I am now who don't get it? If you are a manager & you try defending laziness/unprofessionalism/so on & so forth against me & mine, I will give you hell for it. Just a fair warning.

General Musings Part 20

Can't believe I'm at part 20 already. Okay then, sit back because there are a LOT of articles today.

First off, this author of this piece is a total tool. I saw nothing in here about improved public transit or any effort to increase it in light of $5 gas. As long as you've got oil lobbyists controlling government and getting tax breaks, there's nothing good about gas prices squeezing out poor people from mainstream society and turning the middle class into indentured servants.

Oh, and no one will have any money to shop locally when they can not get employment since all the jobs are located in areas where you have to drive & pay for $5 a gallon gasoline. These so-called "benefits" do us no good when the average person can't survive without becoming a beggar on the street.

Not to mention that it wouldn't change the existence of pedophiles, PC hysteria, helicopter parents, crime, etc. In fact, most people will still have to drive fuel inefficient cars because they will be less likely to have the money to upgrade to a car with higher gas mileage even if they want to.

So until you get the oil companies & interests out of government, invest in new technologies and put funding into public transit akin to that in Europe and Japan (which make NYC's subway system & Amtrak look prehistoric by comparison), stop being a pro-oil company profiteering cheerleader. It's unflattering, elitist and could get you lynched in some neighborhoods.

The lack of guaranteed efficient public transit improvement to all the boroughs (not just Manhattan) is also why I did not support the congestion pricing plan in NYC.

Seeing this makes me feel a little optimistic but the fact remains that entrepreneurs and small businesses are not being helped by this current government's regime. So many things need to be done to fix things, it's not funny but I'm sure people more knowledgeable than me can come up with the bulk of it.

One suggestion is not subjecting college students & grad students to non-discharegable loan debt that's as large as most home mortgages. There needs to be serious reform instead of making people debt slaves for the next 20+ years. If any of these politicians really valued education, they'd be pushing for that change & telling the banks to suck it. Maybe they'd think twice about who they gave student loan money to if this happened. Again, lobbyists & interests ruining everything.

But at least there is one instance of a government doing something right. Yeah, yeah, employers getting around it...blah blah blah. Thanks for saying something, though. Maybe it will make others follow suit, though I think the fines ought to be a lot higher (say $10,000 then $50,000 for subsequent offenses). That would get a point across. I don't notice small businesses doing this nearly as much as large, multi-million dollar corporations.

We also have an EEOC, employers. Read it, embrace it, love it. Because otherwise, it's just a matter of time before you get in trouble for violating it & I'd likely have zero sympathy.

Oh, but the BS! It continues!

Not sure if I've ranted about this particular interview question but employers, just give it up already. The "biggest weakness" question is nothing more than an attempt to learn how manipulative the applicant is & how good they are at reciting societal bullshit.

Seriously, if you're asking this question & expecting honesty, you're naive at best. You know you're not getting an honest answer to this one. If you get pissed by the "I work too hard" or "I'm a perfectionist" response, then you're an even bigger douchebag than you were when you asked the question.

If you want a lesson on shortcomings & how one improved, why not just ask about that? Hmmm...that would be HONEST.

That would get the answer you're looking for.

That would save everyone the time of this little pretense & mind game.

Why the hell would you ask an interview applicant that one?!? Shouldn't you be asking their references or past employers about it? I think they'd be a tad more objective & have records in front of them to support the answer, don't you?

And what about people with delusions of grandeur or who are sociopaths? You're just discriminating against them by asking them about their weaknesses since they don't believe they have any.

They should form a class action & file a lawsuit against any employer asking this one. Being a sociopath is a mental condition, you know & people do seek treatment for that stuff. I'd like to see this one as an ADA discrimination claim; that would put this asinine question in the grave once & for all. Hey, if we can have some of the bullshit that has become lawsuits, there's nothing to stop this one from being a viable legal claim if you have the right plaintiffs!

I also saw this career article on what not to wear to an interview. Here's the simple answer, at least as I see it: anything reflecting that you have a personality. No, no don't show a personality. Be a robot!

Thank God I take steps to vet potential employers & avoid interviews for any job where I'm expected to be a robot. I simply ask what I should wear to the interview so I'm not overly dressy or intimidating since female lawyers have enough problems without me playing to stereotypes of being frumpy and fashion clueless.

Oh, and this is one more thing that irks me about the education system. I'm pretty sure the high school children have heard far worse at home or speak even more graphically in the hallways. For all you know, some of these children are already sexually active & you're going to fine this teacher for "using curse words in front of kids?"

Gee, I'd swear this happened in Mississippi or even NC instead of Manhattan. In some circles in the South, cursing is tantamount to treason. Using the "f-word" is as bad as murdering someone. I'm surprised no one's been incarcerated down there for saying it on the public streets; they probably would be if we didn't have 1st Amendment lawsuits on it.

More asinine censorship:

* A man in the UK was arrested for singing the song "Kung Fu Fighting" because some Chinese man & his mother were offended. If you'd have been "offended" in America (particularly NYC or more vocal places in the South), you'd have been told off by the audience & if the singer saw you, you'd be told to get over yourself (actually, it might be "Fuck you" in NYC or Jersey). Now if this singer were telling the crowd to murder Chinese people, that's a different story.

But singing a song you don't like? I just wonder when some whiny PC obsessed jerkwad is going to try that in America.

If we started going down that route, we'd have no classic cinema, music or anything else because racism has been alive and well since those long before those mediums were born. Oh, and everyone's offended by something. Live your life trying to find something to be offended by & you'll certainly find it. I'm offended by people who do nothing but bitch about everything & make zero effort to do something about it. I'm also offended by these busybodies daring to tell me what I can or can't hear, watch, read, listen to, whatever by filing lawsuits to suppress what THEY don't like.

If you want to live in a bubble away from mainstream society, I suggest you form your own religious community like the Amish or particular Mormon sects (or move to an island where you'll be the only one there, whatever).

Otherwise, get the hell over yourself and shut up unless someone attacks you or your loved ones personally (and I mean a real attack not "pulling the race card" bullshit). Get some earplugs, change the channel & go on your merry way.

* Fox is apparently not showing this hurricane themed animation block tonight because of the recent storms in the South. Thankfully, none of that hit my family members.

You know something, though? Maybe some of the people in the South who lost things might have appreciated some humor in their lives. It might have made them laugh and feel a little better. Did you ever think of that? I think this is just yet another instance of asinine censorship garbage that's catering far too much to the PC crowd.

Have the people who made this call ever watched these shows? PC they aren't. Why worry about offending anyone now considering some of the jokes on Family Guy? Can't speak for The Cleveland Show or American Dad so much since I don't really watch them anymore (stopped after 1 season) but yeah, this is just stupid.

If you'd be offended by that or think "oh, it's in poor taste" then you have never watched Family Guy in the first place & likely wouldn't start watching it anyway.

* But here is much worse overly PC garbage. Apparently, you shouldn't call your dog or cat a "pet." Seriously, read this.

Yeah, my cat has never complained about being called a "pet." If anything, I think this encourages people to assign human qualities to their animals which is just as bad. A classic example of why this is bad is the show Fatal Attractions on Animal Planet. Stupid humans want to go around assigning human qualities and motivations to their dogs, cats, snakes, bears, chimps, tigers, etc. while ignoring the fact that you are dealing with a dog, cat, snake, bear, chimp, tiger, etc. They have instincts, drives and other characters that make up their species & will never be humans.

They don't want to go vegan, need to be entertained every 5 seconds, want to wear clothes, socialize with other animals (my cat, at least), or go to school to learn the alphabet. Treat the animal like its species: I love my cat dearly & let's face it, cats own you but I know he's a cat. I don't have to cook his meat or put him on a vegan diet. Cats are carnivores: vegan diets would hurt them. I'm not going to dress him up or walk him on a leash. You can bond with animals and mourn their loss as companions but stop trying to make them into furry humans! They don't want or appreciate it. My cat would be offended if I treated him like a human; he expects better than that.

My cat wouldn't give a damn if I called him my pet, critter, fuzzy beast, etc. As long as I feed him, let him snuggle on me, scratch his head & tell him what a good cat he is, he could care less what I refer to him as if I'm not directly talking to him. Yes, I've talked to every cat I've ever had & if you don't like it, piss off you animal hating jerkoff!

And he IS a fuzzy beast since he does kill things (which is one reason we love him). He's usually "Mr. Cat" or given deferential titles. I just think this article goes too far & encourages some other bad human behavior. Just makes you wish for a flaming stick to beat the offenders with.

Finally, I saw this article on supervised teen drinking. Personally, I think the drinking age should be lowered to 18 and we should have a more European attitude about the whole thing. This coming from the child of an alcoholic. I realize not everyone who drinks is an alcoholic & not all people who drink become fight picking jerks who put their fists into walls or throw things at people (yes, my father did do this stuff).

The reason I think that should happen is the high rate of binge drinking and the idea that if you ban something so hard, you make it that much more of a curiosity and alluring to the person who can't get it. How many stories are there about pastor's kids who are total hellions either as teens or once they get out from under their parents' roofs? I certainly rebelled some when I left home. It's probably why I dated in college and why I have different attitudes about sex than most of my family. If there isn't some balance in the home and some room to deal with kids rebelling, you're just going to have an out of control hellion on your hands sooner or later. So many people I knew who went to the religious private school I went to had their rebellious moments & many ended up in major life situations. If my mother had continued being as strict when I was a teenager, I'd have probably gotten a police record, become a teen mom, skipped school or God knows what else.

If that's not proof moderation is better than outright authoritarianism, I don't know what else you need. I think the drinking age should be 18 since if you can be drafted, go to college, etc. you can get alcohol from older friends anyway. Plus, tons of kids over 18 have opportunities to drink and it's foolish to think that they don't, especially if they're in college and living far away from home.

Otherwise, let's move the age of adulthood to 21.

I Got a Published Blog Post!!!

If you read this blog, you're not going to be all that shocked with it & probably read about it before but I feel it's a topic that is sorely ignored & really shouldn't be.

I actually saw 2 posts on this blog about unemployment & thought they were very well written, cogent and made fine points. Especially this one on how to solve unemployment in 4 easy steps.

This blog author & I have a lot of commonalities when it comes to that viewpoint. If Craig's List ads are any indication, I think respect for employees is sorely lacking among far too many employers. It also doesn't help when you read HR blogs & career service experts constantly espousing the exact opposite viewpoint to #2 in this list.

Now I don't really call myself a liberal or a conservative; I'm more of a free thinker. I won't tell you I'm a political expert or know a ton about economics but I definitely know shady behavior & BS when I see it. It's probably why I don't really "play nice with others" or sit back and let injustice happen.