Wow, Seems OU is Finally Doing Some Things Right

Oglethorpe University: it's the school I got my college degree from. You can probably tell I have a mixed relationship there. My history was not so great in some major aspects. As I mentioned in that last post, I went to an alumni event I was invited to on Monday.

My expectations weren't very high & I wasn't sure I'd have a good time. I was concerned, for one thing, about having to deal with the bitchy attorney who pretty much told me I had no chance in Hell of ever getting to live out my dream of being in New York City (at the time, I didn't know there was such a thing as being an entertainment lawyer).

I was also concerned it was going to be a big "give me money" fest. That was a huge thing when I was in undergrad; every time you turned around, you were being begged at for money. Even in my senior year, I remember being accosted to contribute to the Senior Gift (which I did not contribute to due to the total lack of support I got in terms of financial matters & feeling like the institution was sabotaging me). I remember them asking me to give money mere months after I graduated.

You know, maybe we should institute some rule that says schools you graduate from can't ask for money until you've been out for at least 5 years. For law schools & professional programs, let's make it 10 years.

Turned out it was a good thing I went because of a great many things:

1. People were nice to me. In fact, one girl I knew recognized me instantly & gave me a hug. She told me I looked great. So did she. She was a member of Chi Omega, which had a HUGE chapter at my school; in fact, their chapter was the oldest one there. I told her about being mistaken for a member of Chi Omega (this was when I was a freshman & we were doing Greek Week) & she said "That's because you're cute." I had to tell her what Psycho Boy told me about how I was the prettiest of our founding members, though it was not my intention to diss them in that story. I was simply sharing an anecdote. The first thing she does is tell her husband about how I founded a sorority chapter. Chi Omega was definitely known for having hot girls; I had kind of hoped Psycho Boy would just meet one of them & not bother me anymore when he was getting too carried away w/me but sadly, that didn't work even though he'd not been a fan of redheads before me.

That made me feel really good considering it felt like us against the world when I was there. It also gave further validation of my no longer being an ugly girl.

I also no longer get to diss Chi Omega though believe me, there was dissing going on & probably among all 3 sororities. I don't think I really have a personal beef with them; maybe it was more akin to sorority rivalries.

At this time, I learned about a website called "Chi Omega Secrets" where this former member who'd had a very bad experience in her chapter decided to create a website revealing all of Chi Omega's secrets. To my knowledge, that site's long gone but if you saw it, you would believe that Chi Omega is akin to the Wall Street bankers or the Freemasons in their evil doings & that all the members have hearts as black as Satan himself. Heck, you'd probably hate all sororities if you'd seen that one. The book Pledged probably also killed us though none of that happened in my sorority experience. Don't know if that's because of the circumstances in which I came into my sorority or not but it is the truth.

After all, could you imagine someone like me putting up with hazing? You can't haze people who hold lifelong grudges. They'd eventually kill you or not save you if you were in trouble.

I just felt sorry for the members having to live up to this lofty standard to belong & likely not getting to just relax and be themselves. Many of the founders in my own chapter were not friendly with folks in Chi Omega & preferred the girls in the other sorority on my campus (at that time, Sigma Sigma Sigma).

Oh, and if you question people remembering me I had someone who graduated the year I came in who knew who I was. I didn't recall him & he wasn't a friend of mine or anything but he'd worked at the Admissions Office and said he remembered my coming in. If that guy could remember who I was after not seeing me in a good 10 years, that tells you something & gives me credibility to get pissed if you forget who I am.

2. The President of the university came up & spoke to me directly. I didn't know who he was when he approached me since I'd be talking to someone else before that & he just came up. We started talking and then I was like "I don't believe I caught your name," then learned who he was. He said to me "I think I got there after you left." I said "Yeah" and mentioned I'd been there when Larry Large was President (if you think that sounds like a porn actor's name, you're not the only one since my classmates certainly joked about it on a regular basis including some of my sorority sisters; I wonder if there are any real porn actors named Larry Large).

He then went to speak at our event & basically, I got a very good impression of the guy. He struck me as being the opposite of Larry Large since he mentioned the school making in roads in the community and asking for money from people who could well afford to give it & were their "best friends." He also told me about how they did allow productions to film there (since I think I told him about having my entertainment company) & I mentioned how when I was there, I always heard about the school rejecting those offers.

Plus, having met & spoken to Larry Large as an undergrad I don't recall him being the sort of guy who'd just come up and talk to you at random like that. He also gave me more of a pretentious & unfriendly vibe.

From what I heard, it was like "I wish that had happened when I was there." For instance, now they've got a scholarship for kids who are the first in their families to go to college (totally would have helped me if it had been an option). There's no more racist frat. I hope the business community had some sway in that one since I know that as a business owner, I would be wary of helping a college that had the incidents this school did; I know my company would have said "no way" to helping the OU I graduated from in 2003 & I think many wouldn't want their name associated with such things, even in the South. You are talking about Atlanta, after all & that's a major city.

3. Other people felt the same way I did about the presence of that racist frat & other crap I saw. I told some folks about it since they were close in time to my graduation year & I did mention that I'd not been to any alumni events or given a dime to the school b/c I couldn't in good conscience. After all, I explained, my company was at one time minority owned & is woman owned (majority ownerships, you understand).

It seems a lot of other people hadn't been to alumni events either so glad it wasn't just me who'd been a long ago graduate who'd not bothered. A girl who'd graduated a few years after me told me it got worse & apparently one frat whose house my chapter got was also involved in some racially discriminatory stuff (though they'd not done that when I was at Oglethorpe & had always been nice to us; at that time, they were more known for their legendary parties).

4. It was kind of weird going to this one after having gone to so many lawyer & creative industry networking events. This one was definitely better than most lawyer networking events I've gone to. Now we'll just see if anyone writes back or reaches out to me. I gave out business cards (since they're the lawyer's MasterCard; you never leave home without them) & just had to put more in my bag for the start of NY Comic Con tomorrow.

So, even though I got into the LinkedIn alumni group of another school entirely at random (you could say they "adopted" me I guess though no one ever contacted me or asked me things from there) I feel I can claim Oglethorpe again. I still don't know exactly when the racist frat left but I do know it was probably after 2009 if Wikipedia can be trusted.

All in all, it was a pleasant surprise & we'll see how this whole thing plays out.

The Curse of the Tiny Fingers & Other Rants

Those of you who hate skinny people may get all bitchy & whiny about my conundrum. For them, I say that I have as much sympathy for your problems as you have for mine.

I have teeny, tiny fingers & wrists. Why is this is a problem, you ask?

It makes me keeping bracelets, watches & rings impossible. Try finding a ring in a smaller size than a 5: it almost never happens. I constantly get disappointed if I go to a street fair or any place with rings at an affordable price. Sometimes, I might find a 4 (the size I've worn since at least high school).

And now, a 4 doesn't even fit. Last night, I noticed my wedding ring was gone. I've been depressed and frantic about it since I noticed this. I don't even remember when I last had it on or if I lost it in my home or on the streets of Manhattan.

It's not the first piece of jewelry or ring I've ever lost. However, it's not replaceable. The cost really isn't the issue; it's more sentiment & the principle of the thing. My husband didn't buy it for me; it was a gift from my mom since she'd had the ring for a long time but could no longer wear it.

It's not even as though everyone I know has their original wedding ring. My parents haven't had any for ages. But I look at the relationship status of everyone I know with this little ring problem & it makes me feel it's a bad omen.

Here's a great symbolism story: I had this diamond chip ring in high school. I'd lost it for a couple years then found it when I was a senior. This guy I was dating at the time (who was completely eccentric) told me he liked it.

One weekend, I went to visit my undergrad in Atlanta on one of those college weekends. That weekend, I lost it God knows where.

Months later, after I graduated from high school, this boyfriend calls up & decides to dump me over the phone. He told me that the same weekend I was in Atlanta & lost that ring, he'd cheated on me. Honestly, I was more pissed that he'd cheated on me before my senior prom than that he cheated to start with. I was moving away for bigger & better things, after all.

My sister thought he was lying b/c he was NOT that attractive (if you saw him, you'd say "You could have done better.") but the symbolism of it all stuck with me.

Is my husband now going to cheat on me or just get tired of dealing with my BS? He says he won't & said he'd get me something new. But....

I just can't help but get depressed. I know we can't afford it & forget getting ME a diamond. I'll just lose it unless it's a necklace or earrings. At least I don't lose those so much. I'm told gold bands aren't much but I don't really care for that. I'm more of a white gold or silver person so I'd want a band with white gold as well or maybe a second ring like an onyx or something not too pricey or traditional that I like.

I'm not a materialistic whore & I think the whole ring thing is a needless expense but I don't want the world thinking I'm single either.

There was the suggestion that I get this wedding ring as a piercing on my bellybutton or my nipple so I'd not lose it. Nipple piercings hurt, though. I know someone who got that done. I wanted a bellybutton one years ago but not sure I'd be able to maintain it. Maybe I should just get a tattoo but then that brings up the problem of divorce.

Now, if you think that's bad try finding me a TOE RING. Unless that toe ring could be a gnat's hula hoop, it won't fit my miniature toes.

So the next time you think it's so fun being skinny, try shopping for jewelry. I have to get bracelets & watches altered to not fall off my tiny wrists + get this for rings. I just hope a 3 & 1/2 won't cut off my circulation; I like to take rings off if they're hurting my fingers or I wash my hands. I also don't want a green mark on my hand.

In other rants, I saw this article about tapping into your alumni network. I've tried it & it doesn't work in the legal field. That field's too "dog eat dog" & people either never respond or are total jerks like that one bitch from undergrad who tried to tell me to be miserable. I wait for the day to give her a freaking shock in not only making it to NYC but getting to work in a very hard to get into field.

I tried it with other law school alum and it doesn't work. I've had better luck directly talking to people in the entertainment field but that's not even guaranteed. These people may think I won't remember but they'll be in for a shock if I turn out to be the person who keeps them from working w/my company or for some friend of mine or even a friend of a friend who thinks their actions are stupid, distasteful or whatever.

Nastiness to me has repercussions & more professionals should note that today's youngster is the future. Tomorrow, that person could be the CEO of the next big thing or a trusted adviser who can put the nail into the lid of your professional coffin. That's why you should be polite to everyone & at least give the courtesy of a response to someone who takes time to write you. I consider lack of a response as a rude brushoff that will be handled when the person least expects it.

Finally, an interesting Craig's List ad that makes a point:

Film makers and actors
Date: 2011-01-13, 10:00AM EST
Reply to: gigs-saczr-2158118991@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

For all those postings looking for actors willing to work with out pay: ATLEAST give them a copy of their hard earned work!

It is not fair, unappreciative and extremely rude not to!

Actors spend a lot of money taking acting classes, headshots, sites, etc.

* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
* Compensation: no pay

PostingID: 2158118991

I agree to a point but think deferred compensation is better. I also think you'd better be open to beginners if you want to offer no pay for anything. Otherwise, you're just violating the law of economics.

The people who act entitled to getting my expertise for free make me want to punch them in the face. They should be lucky I have honest prospects in life or I'd probably go ahead & do it. Perhaps get it filmed & start a business around it. Who wouldn't want to watch a jerk get beaten up?

The real adage here is "You get what you pay for."