After not really having an opportunity to wear my revenge outfit on an actual date, I thought to myself "Why not try this as a Halloween costume?" Figuring I could avoid being hit on for a night & donning an outfit that would be weather appropriate and certainly Mother approved (I think my mother would love it if I dressed like a frump and never, ever slept with a man again), I searched for foam pink rollers, a truly ugly mumu fitting of Thelma Harper or Moms Mabley, the proper slippers and the proper attitude/swagger. This outfit took major effort to find; when you're a skinny woman, all the mumu's are nice & fitted gorgeous stuff that simply wasn't working for my plans. My mother actually put our hair in pink foam rollers as kids complete with Dippity Doo & had us sleep in that so we would have curly hair for church on Sunday as well as school picture day. So these were definitely throwbacks/tribute to my Southern upbringing.
To avoid more people bothering me in real life, I donned sunglasses for this so I could post a pic in my blog but if you're a follower of Andy Troy's parties, you'll certainly see pics of me in the full outfit:
I wore this outfit to Andy Troy's Halloween Party since I had to test it out among industry peers (and I've heard Andy is one of my fans so I felt I should support him in kind) along with a single's Halloween party the next night & on my surreal adventure reviewing the Village Halloween Costume Party. I also really wanted to wear this on Halloween proper and no way was I getting to wear this for a court appearance like I did with my goth bunny costume last year. I was going to also wear it to a Halloween party at a strip club I'd been invited to but torrential rain thwarted that plan since I wasn't about to go out in bad weather wearing this despite the shower cap.
The shower cap and robe came about for practical purposes: the shower cap to keep my hair from falling out of the rollers and the robe to avoid freezing too death while traveling outside. It turned out that mumu was quite warm & at both Halloween parties from Friday and Saturday, I came home to find my shower cap doused in sweat from being in freakishly hot conditions. I actually had the robe since I think it was a gift from my ex's relatives & I got a bunch of shower caps to keep my long hair from getting wet if I wanted to shower sometime without having to go through the long hassle of drying my hair.
Okay, so the purpose of this getup was so no guy would be interested in me. I figured dudes would see this & run for the hills or just find it hysterical then run for the hills. The concept in my own head made me chuckle & if you know me, you know I NEVER do what everybody else is doing on Halloween; I get to wear sexy stuff all the time with the entertainment and fashion events I go to & in fact, it's sort of expected that you're doing it so I like to do something I don't normally do on Halloween (that whole "wearing a costume" thing since the sexy stuff is more my real self). I deliberately wore this to the single's Halloween party as the ultimate "I don't give a fuck" statement; that was the same reason I was going to wear it to the strip club Halloween party. I suppose it's my spirit of fun to not give a damn & definitely see if I get the same results as somebody who's actually trying & putting in effort to get things.
Turns out this outfit was a hit in more ways than one. I had my suspicions of it when I did my first hair test, saw my hair in the rollers, put on my getup and saw that I didn't look nearly as hideous as I expected to. I said to myself "This is why you are divorced." Even my deliberate worst is still gorgeous to the world at large!
As proof of this, I had about 3 different guys try picking me up at Andy Troy's party. One even wanted to walk me home to my home proper but he was not my romantic interest, I felt he was too damn pushy & he worked in my industry. That's a no go for me. Plus, I'd wanted to see this other guy who is my flavor that I'd hoped would be around later (he wasn't but I saw him a few days later).
Saturday night, I wore this to a single's Halloween party I paid for a ticket to attend. Normally, I like to save my $20 for more important things (I meet guys all the time without trying or putting in great effort) but the opportunity to try out this social experiment proved too enticing to pass up. We were given cards we had to match up to win a prize and like others at this event, I decided to affix my card to my name tag to make things easier. I also did some Facebook Live videos while I was there since it was my first singles event ever. Normally, I'm not the type to go to such things; I usually walk into the room and get swarmed or approached within 30 minutes of showing up (not necessarily by anybody I'm impressed with or find hot but it does happen). Natural redhead, baby! You never have to engage in cheap theatrics or put in tons of effort to get guys if you're in my tribe; we'd find it demeaning to bother in the first place since nobody wants a guy who doesn't see their value right away.
The guy I matched up with happened to be my physical type & intelligent so we got to talking and managed to hit it off. We went out last night & he was even nice enough to be in my second Facebook Live video of the evening though I told my viewers not to get attached to him since guys I do anything intimate with tend to have almost no longevity in my life. I have my reasons, a big one being I don't tolerate bullshit. We ended up leaving and going to a diner then were making out in front of a subway station at 2 in the morning. He was dressed as a cop so people kept yelling "Officer" at him. I had people compliment my costume while I'd explain where the concept came from; that outfit communicates a lady's anger towards a man far more effectively than yelling at him, don't you think? People commented to this guy that he was not supposed to be doing that while on duty (making out with me); I thought of responding that I was performing a public service so people wouldn't get accosted and minorities wouldn't be harassed. The scene just made me chuckle loudly on my way home and before I left my cop.
This brings us to The Village Halloween Costume Ball on Halloween night:
This was definitely the place to be if you wanted to see costumes that weren't “sexy” this or that which is NEVER sexy but simply created that way so women have an excuse to show off their assets for one night. It's one of those events that if you're going to attend, you should probably not have stuff to do the next morning. When I walked in at 7:40/7:45, I was treated to a drum performance. I also saw a number of creative professionals I know in the business, including one attorney I know whose show I stared in a while back (one performance actually was at Theater for the New City). I also saw someone who recognized me from Andy Troy's Halloween Party a few days back (since even among the creative costumes I saw at this event, nobody was going around in foam rollers and a mumu) & did some networking with new contacts while also getting raves on my costume. At one point I took this pic in my outfit for the readers and a professional photographer decided to take my pic, declaring me beautiful.
You had the option of hanging out in the lobby, the Cauldron where food and drinks were being served, the Ballroom later in the evening, taking a stroll through the Scary Room, going to The Womb Room or going to the Cabaret to see performers onstage. I saw John Grimaldi, a regular at Theater for the New City in the Cabaret and let's just say he is far more proficient in bubble creation than you mere mortals. He also did an act involving a real life fire baton (the first time I'd ever witnessed such a thing as I'd only heard about the famous fire batons Susanne Sugarbaker twirled in her pageant days) & managed to not harm himself or get distracted despite people walking in and out. It's not many performers handling such feats who could do that and maintain their focus.
I also saw a couple of performances in The Womb Room, where the show I'd been in had been shown. One play I saw was “Relationship Counseling” featuring a man who is dealing with a romantic relationship with a robot. The male actor was very good at falling from intoxication & making it realistic while the actress playing the robot was pitch perfect in her portrayal of the sensible, far more clever robot. The second performance I saw was by Lily Ali-Oshatz, a spoken word performer/singer who just brought us from a happy to a cryptic, disturbing place with her take on a young woman's experience with dating in the big city. I thought “Well, that took a dark turn fast.” If ever you wanted to get a grasp on the idea of date rape as experienced by a woman, you should have seen that performance since it took you there in an unabashed, direct way.
Perhaps it was fitting that the Scary Room was right near The Womb Room. I had to wait for a time before it was open but it was definitely more scary than any regular Halloween haunted house or even a religious “Hell House.” This room went into the damage resulting from global warming and climate change, leading to a post-apocalyptic nightmare world in the year 2037 where people have resorted to cannibalism, pollution and mutation are widespread and civilization as we know it has almost literally gone to Hell in a handbasket.
Had I been able to stay out longer, I would have hung out more in the Ballroom. The Ballroom was awesome and grand, I imagine like a dance way back when would have been like if a live orchestra was present. I did end up making a new potential business contact while I was in that room but no dancing for me and I had to get up early the next day for work + be mindful of subway schedules. Overall, I'd say it's definitely a Halloween event done right and if you went you'd definitely have a fun time since there's something for everyone there.
So, the results of this social experiment were "You can't make yourself look ugly; you're going to get hit on no matter what so embrace it, get the hell over it & stop letting assholes try to guilt you for admitting your beauty exists." It makes the idea of having attractive women cover up & be frumpy pathetic since you won't change beauty, you haters. I also have long since decided I would only wear makeup and dress up at my choice, not somebody else's. No guy has demanded things like that out of me & I never looked as bad as that costume even when I was a "housewife" as some people asked if I was supposed to be. I have more style than that, folks & fully intend to maintain it as I age. It's my contention at this point that me trying to deny having looks is like trying to deny the sky is blue or the grass is green. Others have to confront this in their own ways.
Sunday, November 5, 2017
My Epic Costume & A Surreal Adventure All Rolled Into One: My Halloween Adventures & The 40th Annual Village Halloween Costume Ball at Theater for the New City
Posted by Film Co. Lawyer at 1:20 PM
Labels: beauty, Designing Women, fire baton, foam rollers, John Grimaldi, Lily Ali-Oshatz, looks, Moms Mabley, mumu, Susanne Sugarbaker, Thelma Harper, Village Halloween Costume Ball
Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)
Post a Comment